The homeless mother's child story was disturbing

[SHRED]

Trump never said what happened to the mother.

Sickening.

[Kali]

1. who cares - just an incubator for the nice cop family

[SHRED]

2. That was ugly wasn't it?

[Kali]

3. it was disgusting

the whole thing was

[bettyellen]

5. It was sooo disturbing- he ran home to tel his wife he could get them a baby easy and cheap I guess?

What the ever loving fuck? I hope someone does a follow up on the mom. Fuck those people.

[LeftInTX]

6. Sounds like something from the 1930s

He probably went the legit route, but Trump tells it like a 1930s movie.

[bettyellen]

7. They probably pressured the mom into it, agreed not to press charges and maybe get a

Friend to find her placement at rehab or a few grand to go away. Much much cheaper than going through normal channels. I guess the wife had enough after pushing out four of them. And yeah, it’s like the depression when people sold their kids.

[SHRED]

8. I want the back story to this apparent kidnapping

[writerJT]

11. Easy enough to find

https://www.cnn.com/2017/12/15/health/police-officer-adopts-opioid-newborn-next-chapter-btc-beyond-the-call-of-duty/index.html

[bettyellen]

15. So, his first instinct was to take the baby. And he needs to keep in touch until the adoption is

final. While it’s nice he’d like to adopt, it’s not cool that it’s an addict he’s personally putting pressure on and supporting. If she’s not being bribed, I don’t know what else to call it. If he really had hoped for the parents he’d be fostering, I think.

[writerJT]

16. Amid the opioid crisis

what we definitely need is criticism of people attempting to help the victims of addiction. Great job.

Or maybe you can present facts that she was pressured and bribed. Go for it. That is, if you have time while fostering children of people recovering from opioid addiction.

[bettyellen]

17. His first thought of concern was for the baby- he admittedly hated the poor he worked among....

So forgive me if I don’t think he cares about that couple nearly as much as he does their signatures on the papers later in the year.
There are certainly many people who have been wait listed for babies for adoption, so it is hinky that this man who’s admitted first thought was “gimme that baby” was able to jump the line. It’s bizarre. And yeah, I doubt he became a good man overnight after literally hating the folks he worked for- especially at such at young age. He sounds like quite an asshole.

[writerJT]

18. Okay.

So your basis for that belief is that this is...”hinky.”

And your contribution to the opioid crisis is confined to sniping at people who are actually doing something.

Got it.

[bettyellen]

19. Oh please, that man is as self serving as they come. He needs them around to sign papers.

Just days before meeting them he thought they (and all like them) were the scum of the earth. Sorry, but I wish the cold was going to someone with an actual history of compassion- not this convenient little bit of generosity he’s got going that serves to get him what he wants.
When people tell me who they are- selfish and misanthropic in this case- I believe them.

In this case you know nothing about me, so screw off w your judgement of me. Save it for church, buddy.

[writerJT]

21. Strange discussion here.

You’re making stuff up with absolutely no basis in fact. That much is clear.

What’s not clear is your motivation for those baseless, hateful comments. Whatever the reason, it certainly doesn’t have anything to do with the facts presented in the stories about this case.

[bettyellen]

22. He admits to hating the public he worked for. He says his first reaction was to think of his own

family and bring the idea of adoption to his wife.
He claims to have compassion for the couple and has helped stabilize their situation, but you know they do need to be somewhere he can find them to complete the process. I think his admitted hateful mindset toward humanity and first reaction are telling things- the rest is boilerplate generous stuff people do for couples they’re trying to adopt from.

The difference is usually those adopting out have a representative looking for families. It’s not people directly approaching the pregnant woman with interest in the baby. There are good reasons it doesn’t usually work that way.

[rusty fender]

23. Local Albuquerque news

has been all over this story. The mother was a heroin addict. She told the officer that she wanted to find a good home for her baby, but was afraid that she wouldn't be able to. The officer told her that he could provide a good home for her child. The officer helped her and her partner get into rehab.

The local tv station also reported that the baby had a difficult time adjusting to being in the light; perhaps as a result of being addicted

[bettyellen]

26. I know many childless people wait years for babies- even one with problems

It seems really improper that a public servant would be making a direct deal with a sick woman like this. I know from other adoption stories that if you’re dealing with homeless or transient people, keeping tabs on them till papers are signed is a huge concern. I could deal with it better if the story wasn’t presented as if he is some sort of savior. Maybe it’s becasue he was so contemptuous of the poor, but also the self serving acts are painted as pure charity, when they are obviously not.
Just omitting the month we from the telling tonight chilled me.

[MichMary]

28. Why the hatefulness???

Just because this story was part of tRump's speech?

This guy did something 99% of people wouldn't do, and if you read the article you will find the truth about everything, including his continuing efforts to help the couple.

Baby Hope now has a future to look forward to. If not for this cop and his wife, she would probably be DEAD.

FTA:

"He's my personal angel on Earth here," she said. "I don't know where he came from, but I'm really happy, I'm really happy he's here."
Holets refuses to give up. His ultimate goal from the moment he offered to adopt baby Hope was to get her parents sober and in a recovery program. He says he won't abandon them and he won't walk away.

The encounter also changed HIS life, and he acknowledges it.

I guess you think everyone in this story would have been better off to have remained as they were before meeting.

[dumbcat]

30. That's probably it

Why the hatefulness???
Just because this story was part of tRump's speech?

[bettyellen]

31. Perhaps because the man admitted his heart was filled with hate? They never mentioned the mother?

There’s a few reasons, a third being I am cynical.
Somehow this angry st life cop with four kids is going to be a great human being once he has five? I’m not a fan of fairy tales, and when they’re told the way they were last night it pisses me off.

[LeftInTX]

9. Sounds really hinky....

I worked newborn nursery and this is just really weird. I've never heard of signing away parental rights as a way to avoid charges. That would not be acceptable.

The system does not want parents being pressured into giving their baby up. A parent may voluntarily terminate their parental rights. But it would be very unethical to pressure the parent. Voluntary termination with no strings attached. (Usually child is adopted by another family member) The state cab also order termination of parental rights. This usually occurs after multiple drug pregnancies and/or unsuccessful parent/child unification.

It is weird that she gave her kid to a cop that she met. It's hinky.

[womanofthehills]

25. The parents were planning on giving up the baby according to the Albuquerque paper

The birth mother was eight months pregnant with a needle in her arm shooting up heroin when the cop came across her and the father behind a convenience store.

Sixteen years ago, a heroin addict just gave my neighbor her newborn daughter when the baby was a few days old. Out of the blue, my neighbor who had 2 little girls of her own says I'm getting a baby tomorrow and we all thought she was lying. No papers, no adoption - she just raised the child with the blessing of the birth mother. I remember her freaking out about how she was going to register her daughter for school. Might not be as unusual as you guys think.

[anneboleyn]

42. She would have zero legal rights to that child if the birth mother ever returned. I have no idea

why a person would raise a child in this manner, over so many years, without pursuing any legal protection (your neighbor could have done this despite time pressure issues — yes help the newborn and take her in but for god’s sake contact a lawyer who specializes in adoption to protect both the new parent and the child). There are so many ways this could become a disaster without legal sanction. The relationship could be terminated in a moment due to its illegality.

There is a reason why babies/very young children can’t LEGALLY just be handed over without any trace. The problems are many, and they obviously get very dark indeed.

Yes, of course, adopting the child is a very noble act — but she didn’t follow through with ANY of the legal issues whatsoever? I can’t imagine doing this as I would never want that child taken away from us due to a technical legal issue. We saw this happen to a stepfather when the birth mother was a severe, abusive alcoholic (so was the biological father but he had vanished years earlier). He had never legally adopted the children. It was brutal.

Yes, I’m sure it would have been difficult, but situations like this are very troubling for the family court system. Addicts HAVE historically been forced and/or strongly pressured to give up children; also, they are not in a good position to make such a life-changing decision without any help. The mother could get cleaned up and return for her child. This is precisely why there are legal protections in the first place — children need to be protected as much as possible. Being given away like a dog or cat and in very difficult situations is dangerous (for example in terrible situations in which the person taking the child doesn’t have good intentions or is not a capable parent). The birth father also has rights as well — and so does the child herself in this situation.

It doesn’t matter if it isn’t “unusual” — it’s not legally sanctioned, and yes there are good reasons for requiring paper work in these matters.

[Proud Liberal Dem]

45. Exactly

I work in the child welfare system and terminating parental rights on abusive/neglectful parents requires due process, isn't easy, it's not meant to be easy and, frankly, it shouldn't be easy.

[writerJT]

10. The story

https://www.cnn.com/2017/12/15/health/police-officer-adopts-opioid-newborn-next-chapter-btc-beyond-the-call-of-duty/index.html

[writerJT]

12. CNN has been following it

Here’s one story

https://www.cnn.com/2017/12/15/health/police-officer-adopts-opioid-newborn-next-chapter-btc-beyond-the-call-of-duty/index.html

[MichMary]

27. There is nothing "easy"

or "cheap" about adopting an addicted baby. Have you ever done it? Or known someone who has?

The problems don't necessarily end after the whole withdrawal thing, you know. Learning problems, behavioral problems, etc.

Give this guy and his wife a little credit. With four bio kids, adoption had probably never even occurred to them. They saw a need and they met it. The bio-mom's concern was for finding a home for her child. Sounds like she found a great one.

[bettyellen]

32. When he talks about his hatred for the community he works in, it chilled me. Sorry

But I think he needs some therapy and community engagement and not a fifth child of his own. He sounded downright scary and way too jaded for a man his age.
He could have helped her through social services without the added pressure on her - or himself. If he truly believed in this woman he’d be offering to foster. That said I have no doubt there were childless couples with more love in their hearts waiting for a baby passed over.

[MichMary]

33. Did you even read the article?

Bio mom WANTED to find the kind of home for her child that she knew she couldn't provide. She didn't want to put her kid in a foster home. Where did you get the idea he put any kind of "pressure" on her? He saw a need, and he met it.

Do you really think the baby would be better off born addicted, to a homeless, heroin addicted mother, who herself probably has a severely limited life expectancy? Do you have any idea what her life and her future in that kind of a situation would be?

As for his feelings about the community, the guy was probably burned out in his job. That says nothing about any lack of "love" in his heart. It says something about a high pressure job.

I think you're biased because he was featured at the SOTU of a president you despise. That's sad.

Just wondering--are you anti-adoption in every case? I know that I've seen a post from someone here who feels that way.

[bettyellen]

38. Im not anti-adoption at all. I think the circumstances here are strange and that

The man self admittedly sounds like he had severe issues. Way too young to be that burnt out. He should be in therapy and looking for a more suitable career. A man with that kind of hate in his heart for the very people he is supposed to be protecting is scary as hell. I think the baby would have been better off with a formal placement with people who really wanted a kid and did not have mental health issues like that man. A baby is not the cure for stress and lack of empathy and it disturbs me to see it presented that way.

[StevieM]

50. Just because it was said that the bio-mother wanted an adoption that doesn't mean it was true.

They should have tried to get her some help and back on her feet. And they should have tried to preserve the biological family.

[hunter]

48. Or known someone who has? Yes.

Cousins, nephews, nieces, and friends.

Complicated, and open, and very, very, very, messy sometimes. That's life. Sometimes bio-mom is a package deal with the kid. Sometimes even the dads.

No volunteers to be Trump Tools.

[Blue_Tires]

49. +1

[bullwinkle428]

4. NAILED IT. I said the very same thing as the story played out.

[Leith]

13. I Wondered the Same Thing

for all the viewers know, the child's biological mother is still out on the street.

[OhioBlue]

14. According to the clip I saw on TV this morning, she and the bio father are in rehab

She was appreciative to the cop, credited him for supporting her in a recovery program.

[womanofthehills]

24. Unfortunately, many addicts will always be on the streets or crashing at other addicts houses

In one of the articles, the birth mother said she liked her lifestyle.

[arthritisR_US]

20. My daughter was really disgusted by the same.

[MichMary]

29. It's easy enough to find the whole story

including what happened to the bio-mom. Try Google.

What is really disturbing is that people here think that adopting a homeless couple's drug addicted baby is an act of selfishness.

What do you think would have happened to that baby if the cop hadn't taken her?

[WhiskeyGrinder]

34. If the cop hadn't taken her, an agent of the carceral state wouldn't have pressured a vulnerable

person into giving up her child directly to him. I mean this is fraught with ethical problems. Shame on anyone who thinks this is somehow a good solution.

[MichMary]

35. Where did you read that he "pressured" her?

Shame on me, then, for thinking her baby will do better with this family than she would if she were left to be born to a homeless, drug-addicted mother.

After all, the kid would thrive in the kind of environment her bio-mom could provide.

[WhiskeyGrinder]

36. You don't think there's a power differential between a cop and someone with a needle in her arm?

Huh.

[MichMary]

37. Sure there is

Again, shame on me. He should have left her alone. The kid would be dead now, but, you know, at least there wouldn't have been any "pressure" on the bio-mom.

[bettyellen]

39. Those were not the only two choices-but if cop cant have the baby, no one will is chilling enough

Interesting you’d see it that way. There’d be lots of interested families who don’t hate their lives as this cop did. The baby is a band aide. I hope he gets help too.

[MichMary]

41. She was 8 mos. pregnant

and no one else had stepped up.

[bettyellen]

43. He needed to help get her to social services- even if there was nothing in it for him.

The whole thing is tainted by his idiot idea that another baby is going to make him a better man. If he was under severe pressure and having bad emotional issues, taking on another baby is a very risky thing to do. I get that a lot of people want to gloss over this man’s problems- but he was admittedly a powder keg- a tragedy waiting to happen. Another baby is not the cure for so much stress and hateful attitudes. God forbid the baby isn’t as sweet and easy as it seems to be as a newborn.
He could have helped her find a placement without adding additional stressors to his troubled life. Bad judgement.

[MichMary]

46. If you want to see burn-out

go to a social service agency. I know that more than a few of them hate their clients.

[bettyellen]

47. Burnt out with a gun, hating those you are supposed to protect while only 25 yrs old....

You really want to gloss over that and pretend he’s a better person than those who chose to work in social services? Interesting comparison, becasue the social services people would not actually be taking the kid home- so it’s irrelevant. If this man had admitted his feeling to the department, he could loose his gun, and his livelihood. But, no additional stress there, right? Ugh.

[bettyellen]

54. Hes got complete control over the 25k hes raising for them on GoFundMe ....

And they “owe” him for the continued “good publicity” he’s drumming up to ensure the donations keep coming in. I’m going to guess they don’t get it all till they sign papers.

[MrScorpio]

40. This shit is normal when everyone who isnt a fetus becomes disposable

Women are just incubators to these people.

[bettyellen]

44. When I read he admitted he hated the people in the community he worked for - and he already has four

Kids at his young age... scary. I’m sure there were more suitable families for this child but they never had a chance.

[left-of-center2012]

51. Give me your baby and you won't go to jail

Good cop?

[bettyellen]

53. My feeling is, he gave her the idea she could do this with limited interference from the law...

And yeah, that’s undue pressure. I can’t see t as selfless. And with that guys hatred for the community the kid came from- ugh!- I hope to god he gets help to deal with the pressure. It sounds like he had no business being a cop, still does not respect the community.

[Motley13]

52. A benefactor is paying for both the mom & dad's rehab

they have been clean for about 40 days

The cop was on Chris Cuomo this morning