The well-known billionaire---let's call him "Richie Rich"---eagerly donned a sterile gown, surgical
mask and latex gloves in order to enter the innermost laboratory of the most exclusive medical facility in the world. "And, here, we have what we like to call 'the merchandise'" intoned the salesman in a proud but solemn voice. "If you are in the market for a superior transplantable brain, sir, you are looking at the world's very best selection".
"I am, indeed, in the market" replied Mr. Rich. "Every now and then, I am struck by the possibility that I might not truly be---you know---the smartest person in the room. I don't like that feeling. I am here to 'trade up'! What are my options?"
"Well, sir, that tray just in front of us contains some of the finest CEO brains ever collected. Only the most successful corporate leaders are included. A steal at only a half million dollars per ounce. The average human's brain weighs three pounds, so---". Here, Rich interrupted impatiently, "Yes, yes, 24 million dollars, but cost is no object! Don't you have anything more exciting? More---exotic, shall we say?"
"Of course," the sales pro assured him, " this tray contains Pulitzer Prize winner's brains at one million per ounce; this one holds Nobel Prize winner's at two million per ounce, and here" he concluded with a flourish "at ten million dollars per ounce, we have Trump voter's brains!
"Wait", said Mr. Rich, "Trump voter brains cost ten million per ounce? Five times more than Nobel Prize winner's? How in the world can you justify that?" he demanded.
The salesman was ready for that question. " Have you ever stopped to consider how many Trump voter brains you have to gather to get an ounce?"
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I think he got his brain from Abbie Normal.
