General Discussion
Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region Forums#secondcivilwarletters is trending on Twitter. There are some good ones!
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Leghorn21
(13,520 posts)Not really
Yeah, really
Nah
Thanks for putting this post together, In!!!
Iggo
(47,487 posts)I was going to type the same thing.
#SecondCivilWarProblems
1. Everyone is just holding up their phone and recording each other. This is how its done, right?
2. Cant we just Snapchat the other side? Im trying to not get my nails dirty.
Tipperary
(6,930 posts)This makes me want to go on Twitter lol!
brer cat
(24,402 posts)Dear Ma,
We defeated the red hats today by accurate bombardment of correctly placed apostrophes onto their misspelled signage. They retreated in confusion and some shame. #secondcivilwarletters
lapfog_1
(29,166 posts)ehrnst
(32,640 posts)Pacifist Patriot
(24,647 posts)dixiegrrrrl
(60,010 posts)My love,
My battalion, the 22nd feminazis, have taken many nazi red-hats hostage by promising to take their virginity. Instead, we torture them by doing yoga while free bleeding.
They asked for a red wave, and they got one
Pls. send more yoga pants.
Coventina
(26,874 posts)This is another great one:
Our unit is being held as POWs in a Waffle House just outside Raleigh NC. We speak to each other via our heroic code talkers, Jose & Carlos. Fortunately the Red Caps do not seem to understand Spanish. Or irony. Or sarcasm. Or grammar.
Your,
Joe
dixiegrrrrl
(60,010 posts)Great minds.....
Pacifist Patriot
(24,647 posts)Fucking awesome!
Link to tweet
I stared at the dying soldier, his Alt-Reich Douchestaffel uniform covered in blood.
He gripped my arm, eyes wild with fear of impending death.
"One question..." he gasped.
"Anything," I said.
With his last breath he sighed, "What is a clitoris?"
#secondcivilwarletters
eissa
(4,238 posts)LMAO, best one yet!
PunkinPi
(4,870 posts)NewJeffCT
(56,827 posts)Link to tweet
Pinned down by heavy crew-served weapons fire by a Trumpistani unit intel missed, our squad had only one hope.
SGT Ramirez distracted the enemy by yelling, "Free Oxycontin!" The numerically superior Trumpistani unit surrendered immediately.
#SecondCivilWarLetters
Link to tweet
Colonel:
During the 3rd Battle of Charlottesville we captured enemy caches of citronella oil, Tiki torches, and Japanese pornography.
Also, Trumpistani leader Richard Spencer was captured as he attempted to escape into a local Walmart dressed as a woman.
muriel_volestrangler
(101,154 posts)Link to tweet
Dear Jeb,
Our depleted ranks grew when a yankee, one Mr. Dershowitz, was shunned from the evenings repast and defected to our side. Alas, he will surely starve before deigning to partake of our crackers dressed with cheese from the aerosol spray can. #secondcivilwarletters
Tatiana
(14,167 posts)Wilson does have a way with words...
lillypaddle
(9,580 posts)backtoblue
(11,323 posts)These are pretty darn funny!
llmart
(15,501 posts)Gotta get our laughs somehow these days and if it's at the expense of the trump nutjobs, then yeah.
No doubt in anyone's mind that Democrats have amazing senses of humor and Republicans have zero.
Initech
(99,915 posts)handmade34
(22,755 posts)is one reason that I am a democrat... our humor is soooooo good!! these have to be put in a book
not fooled
(5,791 posts)so donnie's good for something--serving as the ample butt of jokes.
Coventina
(26,874 posts)Dearest Marie- We have surrounded the Luftwaffle at their headquarters. It will take our most heavily armored vehicles to break through the line of waifu pillow reinforcements. But with Gods help, we shall be victorious.
GoCubsGo
(32,061 posts)They're even funnier, but only because they're so pathetic.
lame54
(35,139 posts)revmclaren
(2,488 posts)The color of the day is puce.
roamer65
(36,739 posts)I have some loonies saved up, so I am ready for the switchover.
superpatriotman
(6,232 posts)juxtaposed
(2,778 posts)roamer65
(36,739 posts)He had better pray that it isnt my brigade that captures him.
Scurrilous
(38,687 posts)uponit7771
(90,225 posts)... are off the charts funny.
muriel_volestrangler
(101,154 posts)I've arrived at the outpost. No one seems to be here. Are you sure you sent me the right coordinates?
Awaiting further instructions.
I'm so lonely.
#secondcivilwarletters
Link to tweet
Gothmog
(143,999 posts)lapfog_1
(29,166 posts)We encountered General Kellyanne on the field of battle today...
we all ordered corndogs and cokes and she was too busy to actually have an organized thought.
Not clear if ordering the corndogs caused this situation.
The battle is won!