More Things You Have To Believe To Be A Republican Today: Dog Days of Summer Edition
More Things You Have To Believe To Be A Republican Today: Dog Days of Summer Edition
I was going to call it "Dog Days of Summer Edition" even before Mister Tangerine Man used the term to refer to someone he absolutely loved and adored back when she was working for him and kissing his ass. But what an...interesting synergy it has now, huh?
Time for another look into the doublethink of people who think Barack Obama was a deranged, narcissist Muslim and Donald Trump is a humble, thoughtful Christian: You know, "Truth Isn't Truth" and all that...
(No. 34 in an occasional series)
Updates:
The border "Zero Tolerance" situation reminds us:
* Valid for Hitler Comparisons: A black man wants to make health care more affordable to more people. Not Valid for Hitler Comparisons: A bombastic bigot with a bad haircut wants to stop immigration, persecute believers of a religious minority, torture people, demand loyalty oaths, punish those who criticize him, build internment camps for children, and refers to other human beings as "animals" (#23, July 2016) .
Add Jim Jordan to an evergreen list...
* Degenerate Perverts Unfit For Office: John Conyers, John Edwards, Al Franken, Elliot Spitzer, Anthony Wiener,
Great Americans Who Deserve A "Mulligan" or Two Or Three: Joe Barton, Larry Craig, Will Gardner, Newt Gingrich, Eric Greitens, Jim Jordan, Nathan Larson, Rush Limbaugh, Vance McAllister, Roy Moore, Bill O'Reilly, Mark Sanford, Donald Trump, David Vitter (#32, Feb. 2018)
All-New More Things You Have To Believe To Be A Republican Today:
* You blast the patriotism of football players who kneel during the national anthem but never bothered to learn the words to "God Bless America"
* Canada is a greater national security threat than North Korea because the UK burned down the White House during the War of 1812
* The best way to keep America safe: cozy up to autocrats like Vladimir Putin and Kim Jong Un while alienating democracies and long-time allies like Canada, France, Germany, and the UK
* The best way to stop gun violence is not to create new gun laws, but to enforce the ones we already have. You don't even actually care about enforcing the existing gun laws.
* We can impose tariffs on other countries by arbitrary whim, but it's completely unfair if other countries respond with tariffs on us!!!
* "Supporting the troops" = Covering up water contamination at military bases
* "Supporting the troops" = Letting them get ripped off by payday lenders
* Businesses have the right to refuse service to homosexuals, but not members of the Trump Administration.
* Things that anger you: Refusing service to members of the Trump Administration. Things that don't anger you: Children in cages.
* Breach in civility: Refusing service to members of the Trump Administration. Not a breach in civility: Bragging about grabbing women by the pussy; making fun of the disabled.
* Compromise: A bill that addresses the concerns of both far right hardliners and far far right hardliners
* The party of Donald Trump, the Mercers, Rupert Murdoch, the Koch Brothers, and Sheldon Adelson can criticize a Democrat for being rich.
* "We put America First and take great pride in selling 100% Made in the USA products to our supporters throughout the country." = Manufacturing your campaign flags in China
* You hate the poor and sick so much that you'd rather go to jail than help them
Three I admit to blatantly swiping from Hunter on Daily Kos (Who is awesome)
* Good: People with Lipton tea bags tied to their hats holding up signs accusing the then-sitting president of being a secret Kenyan in league with terrorists. Bad: Educating children.
* Good: Donald Trump rallies regularly descending into demands that his political opponents be "locked up" for still-unspecified crimes. Bad: Employers paying employees enough money to allow them to continue living.
* Good: Constructing tent cities for ten year olds on the premise that elementary-aged students may in fact be hardened gang members for a gang with no significant presence on the southern border to begin with, giving speeches declaring that Europe and America are being undermined by non-white invaders; going on Fox News to sweatily demonize entire religious groups. Bad: TALKING ABOUT ANY OF THIS.
And back to mine:
* People flooding a government comment system to speak in favor of net neutrality = "Hacking"
* You think Omarosa Manigault Newman is a lowlife reality show star who was obviously unqualified for a government position . You support Donald Trump
* The real villain of Watergate weren't the burglars who committed the crime or Nixon who covered it up, it was John Dean, who helped expose the crime and cover-up.
= new reply since forum marked as read
It has to be a real mind fuck to try to square with all the bullshit conseяvatives are told to eat every day. May their minds melt to mush and they be left drooling on their pajamas in their old age.
King Donald Version......supersedes King Shrub Version.......
... including a lot of made-up shit that never happened.
But now that Cheeto is doing far worse, real criminal stuff ... crickets! Some are even cheering.
