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fleur-de-lisa

(14,627 posts)
Thu Sep 20, 2018, 03:50 PM Sep 2018

Kurt Eichenwald (NYT) reveals he was raped as 20 year old, urges support for Dr Ford

Kurt Eichenwald ✔ @kurteichenwald (New York Times) 8:24 AM - Sep 20, 2018

1. It keeps being asked: Why would anyone wait decades to publicly disclose sexual assault?

I know why. I can write this cause I wrestled with disclosure in years of writing my book A Mind Unraveled. Rather than wait til October book release, as Dr. Ford is slammed, I tell now..

2….I was raped in my twenties while incapacitated after an epileptic seizure. The injuries required me to seek medical attention at a hospital. The period in the emergency room was an emotional blur, of shutting down, of focusing on anything other than the attack…

3…in the fantasy version invoked by no one ever attacked, I should have reported the crime to law enforcement. I could not imagine doing so. This was before DNA, I could not identify the perpetrator because of my state when the attack occurred, and I couldn't handle it…

4…I wanted nothing more than to get out of the hospital, to make the whole experience go away. And I did an excellent job of burying the emotions for years. Even while seeing a psychologist, it took me forever to disclose. I just didn’t want to feel the emotional pain…

5...I didnt want to think about it at all. Because thinking meant feeling, and feeling terrified me. I told my wife around 2004 – after 24 years of marriage and about 30 years after the attack. She could not have been more supportive. She urged me to get....

6...counseling to help me work through the emotions I had buried for so long. Again, it took me a long time to tell the counselor. When I was writing my book about my experiences living with intractable epilepsy, I wrestled with disclosing this publicly. I decided I couldn’t…

7…my wife convinced me, if I was going to write about myself, I had to tell the truth. The whole truth. She told me I had nothing to hide, no reason for shame. I cried, repeatedly, just thinking about writing about it, almost 35 years after it happened…

8…I hoped to use my adult children as an excuse not to disclose. I told them what had happened, and asked if they would be embarrassed if I revealed it in my book. They all offered me endless support, and urged me to do so….

9. …Perhaps the most stunning thing to me was that both my wife and my oldest son told me they knew long before I told. There was nothing I said that gave it away, but they both could tell I was keeping something terrible hidden…

10…Even now, knowing that this assault will be disclosed in a few weeks in my book, I struggle with writing these tweets. Does it make sense to those who have never been through this? For many, no. Does it make sense to those who have? Almost certainly yes…

11…this is not a political statement. I do not know what happened with Judge Kavenaugh. But I do know that Dr. Ford deserves her allegations to be investigated, that a sexual assaulter – no matter how long he committed the act – should never serve on the Supreme Court...

12...and that such a possibility is of such enormous consequence that it must be investigated. Attacking Dr. Ford - without investigating her allegations - for not publicly disclosing demonstrates a decided lack of empathy, a lack of understanding...

13... a selection of politics over humanity. If I knew who my assaulter was, if I knew I would be ripped to shreds by powerful people for politics, I would never disclose. knowing – KNOWING – that the politicians ready to pounce had no interest in finding out the truth, only...

13... a selection of politics over humanity. If I knew who my assaulter was, if I knew I would be ripped to shreds by powerful people for politics, I would never disclose. knowing – KNOWING – that the politicians ready to pounce had no interest in finding out the truth, only...

15...being communicated is that all sexual assault victims must immediate shove aside the emotional trauma, run to the police, or shut up forever. That is how child molestation occurs. That is how rapists get away with their crimes. That is how allegations of criminal activity...

16...go uninvestigated for political purposes. We are being told, even if we manage to navigate the agony to disclose, we will be attacked. The fraud being perpetrated by insisting that this must only be a he-said-she-said, that no other witnesses will be called, that nothing…

17...is more important than rushing through confirmation, that this might not be investigated communicates a terrible message: our pain is inconsequential, our perpetrators had the right to violate us, and politicians consider victory more important than allegations of assault.


38 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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Kurt Eichenwald (NYT) reveals he was raped as 20 year old, urges support for Dr Ford (Original Post) fleur-de-lisa Sep 2018 OP
This is an incredibly courageous statement. Peace, Mr. Eichenwald, peace. nt Hekate Sep 2018 #1
Amazing respect for Eichenwald... He's been so abused recently by Trumpster a'holes trying to hlthe2b Sep 2018 #2
How brave to come forward and share his trauma. FM123 Sep 2018 #3
This is bravery right here superpatriotman Sep 2018 #4
Staggering. Needs to be widely seen. JohnnyLib2 Sep 2018 #5
K&R PatSeg Sep 2018 #6
Disclosure of such an emotionally-charged and personal assault is courageous, to be sure. Atticus Sep 2018 #7
Thank you Kurt,for being so courageous. True Blue American Sep 2018 #8
Thank you Kurt Eichenwald for your courage, perseverance, and honesty cp Sep 2018 #9
Damn SallyHemmings Sep 2018 #10
Tweet #14 royable Sep 2018 #11
Wow. Thanks for saying this Kurt Eichenwald. iluvtennis Sep 2018 #12
Wow! nt LAS14 Sep 2018 #13
Powerful nature-lover Sep 2018 #14
Predators are almost incomprehensible. nolabear Sep 2018 #15
Wow. Silver Gaia Sep 2018 #16
Thank you, Mr. Eichenwald. Solly Mack Sep 2018 #17
I hope talking and writing about this attack helps you heal. blueinredohio Sep 2018 #18
Reality is populated with an inordinate number of monsters. dchill Sep 2018 #19
Strength and honor. WheelWalker Sep 2018 #20
I'm sorry for the pain and trauma MontanaMama Sep 2018 #21
Thank you, fleur-de-lisa, for posting all of that! Ilsa Sep 2018 #22
That is so important to put out there...this happens with both sexes. BigmanPigman Sep 2018 #23
Heartbreaking MaryMagdaline Sep 2018 #24
He got me tearing up at the end there. n/t BlancheSplanchnik Sep 2018 #25
Damn malaise Sep 2018 #26
K&R for visibility & thanks. nt tblue37 Sep 2018 #27
My GOD. forgotmylogin Sep 2018 #28
And the right is mocking him about it. BlueTsunami2018 Sep 2018 #29
K&R betsuni Sep 2018 #30
Mahalo, Kurt Eichenwald Cha Sep 2018 #31
He was attacked by some nogoodnik who posted some strobe effect that, when clicked on, calimary Sep 2018 #32
I have read Kurt Eichenwald's Haggis for Breakfast Sep 2018 #33
Wow. That took guts to describe. Heartbreaking. SunSeeker Sep 2018 #34
Thank you for sharing, Mr. Eichenwald. You have done us all a great service. Nitram Sep 2018 #35
I want to stand and applaud! jimlup Sep 2018 #36
K&R... spanone Sep 2018 #37
K&R for visibility and sheer guts! meow2u3 Sep 2018 #38

hlthe2b

(102,317 posts)
2. Amazing respect for Eichenwald... He's been so abused recently by Trumpster a'holes trying to
Thu Sep 20, 2018, 04:06 PM
Sep 2018

trigger epileptic seizures with the GIFs they send to him via twitter and email. I guess all this goes under "what does not kill you (can) make(s) you stronger"

Kudos to your bravery, Kurt.

Atticus

(15,124 posts)
7. Disclosure of such an emotionally-charged and personal assault is courageous, to be sure.
Thu Sep 20, 2018, 04:28 PM
Sep 2018

But, making such a disclosure in defense of another alleging a similar assault is another level of courageous. I stand in awe of both Dr. Ford and Mr. Eichenwald!

cp

(6,645 posts)
9. Thank you Kurt Eichenwald for your courage, perseverance, and honesty
Thu Sep 20, 2018, 04:42 PM
Sep 2018

May you come to full healing. Thank you.

How Brett Kavanaugh deals with Christine Blasey Ford's pain now is a measure of his character. (Spoiler: I'm not holding my breath.)

royable

(1,264 posts)
11. Tweet #14
Thu Sep 20, 2018, 05:10 PM
Sep 2018

14...wanted to set up an attack, only wanted to violate me all over again, meant I would never speak. Just as they hope Dr. Ford won’t. If these allegations are treated as ho-hum, as a crime that happened decades ago, as unworthy of investigation, then the message...

nolabear

(41,988 posts)
15. Predators are almost incomprehensible.
Thu Sep 20, 2018, 05:22 PM
Sep 2018

A woman is drunk or drugged. A man is having a seizure. A person is ill or disabled...and what comes to mind is RAPE???

It takes someone profoundly broken to do that. I’d only trust them after years of admission, humility and actual reparation. And then only very cautiously.

We are so easily harmed. And so terribly brave.

MontanaMama

(23,333 posts)
21. I'm sorry for the pain and trauma
Thu Sep 20, 2018, 06:27 PM
Sep 2018

you endured, Mr. Eichenwald. You’re very brave. Your story, like most I’ve heard this week slays me.

Ilsa

(61,695 posts)
22. Thank you, fleur-de-lisa, for posting all of that!
Thu Sep 20, 2018, 06:50 PM
Sep 2018

The link to the primary tweet is available, and you copied the rest of the content of his continuing tweets. Brava!

Very insightful posting by Kurt Eichenwald.

BigmanPigman

(51,614 posts)
23. That is so important to put out there...this happens with both sexes.
Thu Sep 20, 2018, 06:57 PM
Sep 2018

Adult women and men sexually assault boys and girls, young men and young women. Sex and age and profession do not matter. Teachers, priests, parents, bosses, etc. It is all about POWER! It isn't sex and that is the big issue. Any person in a position of power and authority over another is capable of abusing it. The memory and pain is with you forever.

forgotmylogin

(7,530 posts)
28. My GOD.
Thu Sep 20, 2018, 09:39 PM
Sep 2018

At first, I thought he meant he was raped *in the hospital* while seeking treatment for a seizure...

BlueTsunami2018

(3,496 posts)
29. And the right is mocking him about it.
Thu Sep 20, 2018, 09:40 PM
Sep 2018

I see it all over Facebook. These are people without an ounce of empathy or humanity.

calimary

(81,365 posts)
32. He was attacked by some nogoodnik who posted some strobe effect that, when clicked on,
Thu Sep 20, 2018, 10:42 PM
Sep 2018

set off an epileptic seizure - as it did with him.

Undoubtedly some Russian troll or trump dirty trickster. Nothing any republi-CONS have ever indulged in, 'eh? They're as clean as a whistle in that department, 'eh? COUGH! Roger Stone COUGH! kkkarl rove COUGH! Lee Atwater COUGH COUGH!!!!

Haggis for Breakfast

(6,831 posts)
33. I have read Kurt Eichenwald's
Thu Sep 20, 2018, 10:51 PM
Sep 2018

work for years, always found him to be courageous, often willing to take a stand that he knew would have the RWers head's exploding and foaming at the mouth.

But . . . this . . . I am speechless.

Kurt, I hope you find peace on your terms.

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