UPDATE - This week's FLORIDA MAN

[underpants]

Florida man with machete cuts neighbor, threatens to 'kill'em with kindness"
http://www.wtxl.com/news/florida-man-with-machete-cuts-neighbor-threatens-to-kill-em/article_0df5c88a-15f4-11e9-b200-a3b1da944d34.html

Florida Man Decapitated By Helicopter
https://week.com/news/top-stories/2019/01/11/florida-man-decapitated-by-helicopter/

Florida Man, Woman Charged with Having Sex in the Middle of the Road
http://www.thedrive.com/news/25909/florida-man-woman-charged-with-having-sex-in-the-middle-of-the-road

Florida man arrested for throwing pizza at father after finding out his dad helped birth him
https://www.abcactionnews.com/news/state/florida-man-arrested-for-throwing-pizza-at-father-after-finding-out-his-dad-helped-birth-him



Florida man arrested after argument over cheesesteak, deputies say
Joseph Lagana angry about receiving sesame seed bun, affidavit says
https://www.clickorlando.com/news/florida/florida-man-arrested-after-argument-over-cheesesteak-deputies-say

[dalton99a]

1. Machete that had the word "kindness" written on the side

[krispos42]

10. *snicker*

Good one!

[ProudLib72]

2. Florida woMan

Party pooper? Florida teacher accused of spreading feces to ruin principal's party
SARASOTA, Fla. - A Florida substitute teacher accused of spreading human feces on tables and grills at a park where a principal was set to host a birthday party told deputies she was "displeased" with how the principal was handling a professional issue.
https://www.clickorlando.com/news/florida-teacher-accused-of-spreading-feces-to-ruin-principal-s-party

I don't usually become displeased. But when I do, I prefer to smear poo!

[underpants]

5. That's one way to handle it professionally

[malaise]

8. This calls for a

Holy Shit!!

[Siwsan]

3. I might have to side with the Cheesesteak guy

First of all, IMHO, the only legitimate argument over a cheese steak is whether you prefer 'Geno's or Pat's King of Steaks'. None the less, he may be in Florida, now, but may actually be from Philadelphia, so those sesame seeds may have sent him to his breaking point.

[underpants]

4. Well, the quality of flea market cheesesteaks ain't what they used to be

Yes at a flea market. This was pointed out to me on another thread.

[Iggo]

6. Sesame seeds. At all. Ever.

Just no.

[Blue_true]

7. I have to admit. If someone tried to serve me a cheesesteak on a sesame roll, I'd fight too. nt

[3Hotdogs]

9. --- Florida Man sure gets around.

[Initech]

11. How do you get decapitated by a helicopter?