Lab technician found drunk, partially nude, with monkeys on the loose

[marmar]

A Georgia Health Sciences University lab tech was jailed this week after he was found intoxicated with his pants down in a campus locker room, a GHSU spokeswoman said Friday. Two lab monkeys were found outside their cages, authorities said.

According to a GHSU Police Bureau incident report, a co-worker discovered Coley Mitchell, 32, partially unclothed in a locker room in the Sanders Research and Education Building about 10:30 p.m. Monday.

Campus police said Mitchell, a Lab Animal Services technician, was intoxicated and seated in a chair with his pants half-down.

The spokeswoman said two monkeys were found outside their cages in the lab but were confined to the room. .................(more)

The complete piece is at: http://chronicle.augusta.com/news/crime-courts/2012-08-17/ghsu-lab-tech-found-drunk-partially-clothed-monkeys-police-say

[Enrique]

1. he got caught releasing the monkey

[fascisthunter]

2. sounds like the GOP!

[dimbear]

3. And you were wondering how "Planet of the Apes" got started. n/t

[Hassin Bin Sober]

42. First they learn how to "roofie" their captors. Then it's on to clubs and guns.

It was only a matter of time.

[undeterred]

4. Were the monkeys clothed?

[Xipe Totec]

5. Pfft! Is that all?

I had a coworker taken by police one time.

Found buck naked on top of a female coworker's desk, playing with his monkey.

They had to take the desk out to get cleaned, or burned. Can't remember which.

[treestar]

32. Reminds me of that story where the guy was

having relations with the picnic table.

[Xipe Totec]

46. Members of a splinter group, perhaps... nt

[treestar]

47. lol

[TheCowsCameHome]

6. Is there a three-way GOP primary race in that area?

That could account for his behavior.

[mysuzuki2]

7. Come on folks, let's not get all self-righteous here.

After all, haven't we all, at one time or another, been drunk, and naked with a bunch of monkeys?

[LiberalCatholic]

38. love it!

[alcibiades_mystery]

8. "Nobody ever told me that this sort of thing was frowned upon..."

[redqueen]

28. That can't be an actual quote related to this incident.

I'm choosing to believe it's a movie quote.

Like this one: "It's got electrolytes. It's what plants crave."

[arcane1]

34. I believe it's a Seinfeld reference

From when George was caught having sex on his desk with the cleaning lady

[redqueen]

36. That's a relief. nt

[Liberal_in_LA]

9. poor monkeys

[nanabugg]

35. LOL!!! nt

[steve2470]

10. something about spanking comes to mind....

[RKP5637]

11. LOL

[Canuckistanian]

12. Whew

Been there, done that.

[longship]

13. Ahh! Hot monkey love!!

OMG! OMG! OMFG!

Sorry about that.

[Poll_Blind]

14. I'm going to pretend like I didn't just read that. nt

PB

[derby378]

15. Hoo boy...

[randome]

16. First they coerce us to party. Then they take over.

It's Escape from the Conquest of the Battle Beneath the Party Planet of the Apes!

(In Technicolor.)

[Initech]

17. On the next episode of NBC's "Animal Practice"...

[cliffordu]

18. I didn't know grantcart got a real job.....

[grantcart]

20. I told them it was part of the job interview process

Hey atleast I didn't put anybody's eye out.

[cliffordu]

21. Well, there's that.....

[MrScorpio]

19. He was just monkeying around. nt

[CatWoman]

22. I don't know why this headline made me LOL

[madinmaryland]

23. He was just spanking the monkey.

[zonkers]

24. Best story all week. Kick.

[hifiguy]

25. There has to be a fascinating and

very funny backstory there!

[formercia]

26. I'm sure he's suffering considerable embarrassment at the moment.

The boy needs a date.

[UnrepentantLiberal]

27. Best headline ever.

Sounds like a few of my lost weekends.

[bigtree]

29. that's as good as nude

. . . with his monkeys loose and all.

[dawg]

30. Did I do wrong?

Sometimes, you just have to let your monkeys out of the cage!

[John Frum]

31. Who hasnt?!?!

I mean...come one.

[lumberjack_jeff]

33. Dude! "Spanking the monkey" is a euphemism. n/t

[mac56]

37. Gets the funniest looks from everyone he meets.

[cynatnite]

39. george bush is a lab tech? n/t

[tama]

40. Jokes are OK

But I'm very much against the incarceration and torture of our cousins.

[ronnie624]

41. *

[Bosonic]

43. Forwarding story to...

[redqueen]

48. Oh, yes...

[PD Turk]

44. That's odd

I didn't think the GOP convention was supposed to start until next week

[FirstLight]

45. thanks, i needed that!

best story of the week... so many naughty thoughts from the headline alone

[zonkers]

49. kick. I just like seeing the silly headline.