What you have to say about your Trump-voting friend may not be popular here, but it needs to be said.
One of the most awful aspects of the whole Trumpist mind set is the division of human beings into "us" and "others". It is, as some have pointed out, a primal thought-process based on fear and it is so, so easy to sink into.
Right now, we here in this forum are banded together as an "us" who oppose Trump. Some of us have gone farther to paint anyone and everyone who has ever supported Trump with a broad brush of paint that covers all those human beings in a thick layer of disgust.
The painful fact is that decent human beings can have ugly aspects to their personalities. Furthermore, there are those who are deeply ugly in their souls who manage a veneer of approved political ideas when in the appropriate company.
I have family members who voted for Trump. Every once in a while, I would hear ugly epithets and truly stupid ideas coming out of their mouths. That doesn't change the fact that they are hard-working, giving people.
The problem is that they are convinced that they (and others just like them) are the only hard-working people around. And their generous, giving natures are limited to what they perceive as their own kind.
Without going into details here, I have some insight into the insecurities and inner pain that fuels their prejudices. I am not an expert on what it takes to affect real change in people, (I'm still working on myself.) but it can happen.
I had heard my mother use the N-word on the rare occasion while growing up. Three months before she died I heard her say that the newly-elected Obama sounded "wise", further noting that he "was going to be fair."
The two family members to whom I referred earlier have become grandparents to an adopted mixed race child. If they were truly deplorable and unredeemable, they would have refused to accept or even acknowledge this child as a member of their family.
It may not be much, but I have a feeling that the next time the one of them who uses the N-word may be met with some censure from the other. "That's our little Suzie you could be referring to," might be the thought that crosses her partner's mind.
Yes, it's pretty annoying that some people don't open their eyes unless a given problem starts to hit pretty damn close to home. Unfortunately, a lot of the human race is that way.
In the meantime, I suggest we look to a very wise man and remember to be fair. We can disagree with people vehemently and oppose their positions at every turn. We cannot, however, take a page from their own playbook and declare anyone who thinks differently than us as a worthless, monstrous "other" whose presence must be eradicated.
We must teach where we can, censure when necessary and work towards legislation that furthers the vision set forth in our founding documents--no matter how flawed the writers of those documents may have been.
Sometimes I want to cry when I hear or see my family members saying or doing something kind and thoughtful. I juxtapose that against other things I hear coming out of their mouths and I don't understand how they can miss the disconnect. Alas, human beings are complicated--as is life, politics and government.
One of the worst problems about our opposition is how simplistic their thinking can be. That's one of the main reasons that they follow the lead of such a simple, shallow man. They want things easy. But it is never easy to love complicated, mixed up people. That's the lesson I keep learning when I look at my country, my family and myself.
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