Congrats you have been picked to write Romney's sppeech for the RNC Convention...

[LynneSin]

post your distorted truths and made-up facts here!

If I'm elected I promise that we will finally land a man on the moon!!!

Women will finally have the right to vote if I'm elected president!!

[hollysmom]

1. I am not worthy and I decline the nomination.

[nolabear]

2. A chicken in every pot and a dog on every car!!

[11 Bravo]

3. Just like I saved the auto industry, I will continue to uphold the centuries long tradition of ...

Republicans defending Medicare and the entire social safety net.

[1StrongBlackMan]

4. Gopers, Teapartiers, christians and conservatives ...

lend me your ears ...

You have been test subjects in an experiment.

The HowDumbAreThey Research Institute commissioned me to run my campaign in a manner designed to test the bounds of rwing lunacy.

By my advancing to this point ... My being offered the largely uncontested nomination to be the gop candidate, after running a campaign where I took no stands on any issues ... where I advanced blatant and provable lies as facts ... where I refused to provide even the most basic personal information about myself ... and most pointedly, where I literally told America people that my plans for America was 'none of their business'.

Based on this study, we can clearly conclude that America is in deep trouble.

Good evening and Good Bless The United States of America."

[Blue Meany]

5. I guarantee that if you vote for me, you will all become as rich as me...

but not in this life. You see, this planet can only support a handfull of people as rich as me, and I got here first. BUT if you convert to Mormonism, you will get your very own planet populated with your own minions right after you die. I know that many of you will want to escape to your own planet ASAP, so please remember to make me your sole heir before taking your life. Details about how to make our your will can be found at: http:Romney.org/very_own_planet_scam.htm

[Lucy Goosey]

6. "This whole thing is beneath me!"

"Frankly, it's embarassing that I have to get up in front of the country and explain to you people why you should vote for me. I'm awkward talking to you people, because I really don't want to talk to you; why should I waste my beautiful mind explaning myself to common people? I mean, I'm a ruggedly handsome, able-bodied, straight, white, son-of-a-Governor billionaire, fer cryin out loud. Haven't you people noticed that my opponent is black and only just barely a millionaire? I am ENTITLED to your votes. I don't ask nicely that you people please consider voting for me; I TELL you to vote for me, you do it without question, and you THANK ME for the privilege. That's how my whole life has worked! I GET WHAT I WANT without explanation or negotiation, gosh darn it! You people should be bowing down and crowning me your KING! I am going to be a God on my own planet after I die!* I am your superior in every way!"



*Actual Mormon belief

[librechik]

7. As I wrote this speech I realized I had nothing but lies and division to offer the country

All of my accomplishments are based on phoniness, cronyism, and things that would cause the US to fail. I therefore resign this nomination, and wish the Republican Party, which has extorted and distorted my native beliefs far too much, godspeed. Thank you America, and good luck.