To my DU friends - people of color:

[cilla4progress]

this senior-aged white woman who's led a life of privilege in the US -

stands with and by you. While understanding you are individuals, and not a monolith of opinion, please tell me how I can support you. What is helpful? What is offensive? What posture or role feels right?

I have my own thoughts, and in order to be a meaningful ally, I need to understand your needs.

Though my Russian Jewish grandparents immigrated here escaping pogroms in the early 1900s, I cannot imagine your experience.

[WhiskeyGrinder]

1. Some ideas.

Check out Nice White Ladies on Facebook.

Follow leading black voices -- particularly women and femmes -- on Twitter.

Leverage your privilege. If you have the means, donate money directly to people who are doing the work of educating, marching, freeing people on the front lines. Donate to bail funds and abortion funds.

Call in your friends and allies. Don't be afraid to speak, but make sure you keep reading and listening.

If someone gives you feedback, listen. Then keep listening. Don't respond. Reflect.

[cilla4progress]

2. So helpful.

Thanks, WG.

[mcar]

4. I hope I'm a nice white lady...

thanks for this link.

[lunasun]

3. Do not remain silent when you hear evil . Speak up if only to let other silent people hear you

It doesn’t have to be about arguing in order to change minds at that moment . it can be about simply stating it is occurring and you are hearing /witnessing hateful comments in a group that you do not agree with. Let it be record among other whites who let this pass so as to not be rude, or agree with the speaker

If you are silent among other whites just to get along then you are looked at as going along with what they are saying to everyone listening not only to the one who is talking trash.

Same goes for any physical abuse that needs to be stopped but be careful they can turn on any defenders of truth.
Thanks for asking I think standing up or speaking out in white groups is important
We are at a limit to what we can do and imo white people need to stand up to those among them
They may listen or cease if you do , which they will not do for us ,as they have no respect for others they despise or want gone . If nothing else you spoke up against the racism and lies and feel good about forming it in to words

I don’t understand why more don’t do it but I’m sure many feel it’s not their problem so why stand up especially among co workers or to family

"There comes a time when silence is betrayal." "Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter." "In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends."
"Only in the darkness can you see the stars”
MLK Jr.
Shine brightly in this darkening world

[safeinOhio]

6. I agree with a lot of what you are saying, however

I take a little different approach. I'm an old White male and live in an almost rural area. Lots of racist and folks that aren't.
I find some folks just want to test me by making a racist comment and here is how I handle it. I give them a cold stare, look at my watch and say I've got to go, good bye.
My degree in psych focussed on the work of B. F. Skinner. Some may call it Radical behaviorism or operant conditioning. In short, reward good behavior and ignore bad behavior as the best way to change behavior.

My GF has a small dog that likes to scratch at the to get her attention to go outside. The problem is he does it all day when she is here. When I'm here if he does that, I get up and go into the other room. He no longer does it when I'm here.

This is what I do and it seems to work. I sure don't want to get into a fist fight or argument, I just give a quick stare and leave. The person is now conditioned to not bring that kind of talk up around me. Very simple.

I would hope this may work for others as it has for me.

[WhiskeyGrinder]

7. The person may change their behavior around you, but there is little to no self-reflection or

growth on their end.

[safeinOhio]

8. If more folks did that, it would.

I'm not going to stand around in a store and lecture someone on their racism. They already know it. For the most part they are just looking for confirmation from another person. Have you ever argued with a MAGA, good luck and that, the person just walks away thinking they really told me off.

I have, a few times spoke up when someone started in on Obama. I've told them "you are a racist and you don't like Obama because he is half Irish, well I'm half Irish too". They look like a deer in the headlights while I walk away. I've never got an argument saying that.

[UniteFightBack]

10. I think it's more important to speak up for others if you see they are being maligned. nt

[LiberalLovinLug]

17. "you don't like Obama because he is half Irish"

[safeinOhio]

18. For some reason, it leaves them

speechless every time.

[pnwmom]

16. Assuming they are now conditioned not to bring that up around YOU, what has been gained?

Not much if most people react by agreeing with them or giving them a pat on the back.

[onecaliberal]

5. K&R

[lostnfound]

9. Similar characteristics as you, and I for one cannot wait until POC "take over"

It can only get better. We are at rock bottom now with this group of GOP pols in office.

[UniteFightBack]

11. You could speak up if you see some bullshit in public. I practice what I preach. nt

[cilla4progress]

12. Yes,

I agree, critically important.

Thank you.

I believe we need a Truth and Reconciliation process here, as was done in S.Africa and led by Tutu and Mandela at the end of legalized apartheid there.

[BlueWI]

13. Thanks for the shout out!

Suggestions?

Share the mic.

Avoid using the opinions of one POC to talk over another POC.

Get to know us as individuals and get to know our struggles.

Be the voice of anti-racism as needed in white-only settings.

Be proud of yourself and let's stand together.

[cilla4progress]

14. Super -

Thank you!

[brush]

15. Thank you. Support reparations initiatives. Some don't like the word so let's just...

call it repaying a debt that's owed.

and it's not about cutting checks. It's job training programs, college aid, small business grants, community infrastructure improvement and development.

It's way past time. Something sure should be done or 100, 150, 200 years from now the racial divide will still be here and some will be saying we can't do reparations because it just can't be done. And the nation witll be no better off because we have refused since the end of enslavement and Jim Crow to tackle and make sincere efforts to address the most heinous wrong in the history of humanity—250 years of human bondage then just throwing miliions of people out into a hostile nation without a cent of compensation for 250 years of unpaid labor, stolen labor really.