EPA Administrator Proves Carbon Emissions Not Harmful By Inhaling Directly From Truck's Tailpipe

[Zorro]

WASHINGTON—During a press conference held in a D.C. parking lot, Environmental Protection Agency head Andrew Wheeler went out of his way Friday to show carbon emissions were safe by putting his mouth over the exhaust pipe of an idling Jeep Grand Cherokee and taking several deep breaths.

“Despite all the fear-mongering on behalf of politically motivated scientists, carbon emissions are not harmful in any way, as you can see,” said a coughing, unsteady Wheeler, moments before he was seen vomiting, losing his balance, and collapsing onto the pavement.

“They pose no threat at all to the American public, and any hysterical claims to the contrary have no basis in reality. Sure, it does burn the lungs a little, but it doesn’t cause any serious harm to internal organs—look, I’ll even take another puff. Oh, God. Oh, God. Someone help me.”

At press time, local authorities had confirmed Wheeler’s death.

https://politics.theonion.com/epa-administrator-proves-carbon-emissions-not-harmful-b-1836912751

[A HERETIC I AM]

1. The Onion has to go to greater and greater lengths to stay ahead of the idiocy.

[KT2000]

2. Remember the guy who drank pesticides

I wonder how he is doing. He was from Texas but can't remember his name.

[murielm99]

3. Maybe he will go ahead and do that for real.

I had to make sure this was The Onion. I can't tell any more.

[malaise]

7. or Borowitz

[lunatica]

8. I'm having the same problem.

[NBachers]

4. He needs to try the enema method.

[Vinca]

5. Satire is so difficult in the era of Trump. I immediately believed it.

[Wounded Bear]

11. Real life has become so absurd, satire is dying...

[Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin]

6. I knew it was The Onion

Still funny

[marble falls]

9. Actually he burnt his lips trying to blow up the truck.

[Historic NY]

10. I just tweet them to see what the freedback is...

[smirkymonkey]

12. Heh, heh!

If only! I love the graphic.