Ryan: nomination is "my greatest triumph since winning the Tour de France"

[pokerfan]

NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—Fresh from the 2012 Republican National Convention, Rep. Paul Ryan (R-Wisc.) today called being nominated for Vice President his greatest personal triumph “since I won the Tour de France, in 2006.”

“That feeling of adrenaline when I was onstage with Mitt,” he told reporters on the campaign trail. “It felt exactly like that when I crossed the finish line in Marseille.”

Read more http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/borowitzreport/2012/09/ryan-calls-nomination-greatest-triumph-since-winning-tour-de-france.html#ixzz25FJuCwft

[geckosfeet]

1. "It felt exactly like that day when we liberated Paris on August 25."

Liberation of Paris

... an enormous crowd of joyous Parisians welcomed the arrival of the 2nd French Armored Division, which swept the western part of Paris, including the Arc de Triomphe and the Champs-Élysées, while the Americans cleared the eastern part. German resistance had evaporated during the previous night. Two thousand men remained in the Bois de Boulogne, 700 more were in the Jardin du Luxembourg. But most had fled or simply awaited capture.

The battle had cost the Free French 2nd Armored Division 71 killed, 225 wounded, 35 tanks, six self-propelled guns, and 111 vehicles, "a rather high ratio of losses for an armoured division" according to historian Jacques Mordal.

Due to American pressure for a white-only liberation force, black French troops were excluded from the triumphal return to Paris on the 25th. << major WTF

The first armored vehicle to enter Paris was the M3 Halftrak named "España Cañí"[citation needed] It was part of the 9th company in the 2nd Armored Division. That company was known as La nueve, Spanish for "nine", because many of the members were Spanish soldiers who fought with the Republicans in the Spanish Civil War, and were exiled to France because of the dictatorship of Franco. The first allied troops who entered Paris were Spanish soldiers, fighting under French flags.

"That feeling of adrenaline when I was onstage with Mitt," he told reporters on the campaign trail. "It felt exactly like that when I marched into Paris with the Free French army."

[pokerfan]

6. Shameful

De Gaulle was against it – he did not separate his men by race like the Americans did – but he had little choice.

Most of De Gaulle’s divisions were about 40% white. The whitest one was 75% white - the 2nd Armoured Division in Morocco. It would be hard to move it into position for D-Day because of all its tanks, but it was the only one that could be made all-white in time. But even as it was, many of the “whites” were not French at all but Spanish, Syrian and North African.

But why did the British and Americans want an all-white division? They said it would be better for propaganda and French morale – as if they knew more about French morale than De Gaulle himself.

http://abagond.wordpress.com/2010/06/17/the-liberation-of-paris-whites-only/

[Make7]

2. "... in under three hours." ( n/t )

[alterfurz]

3. "I worry that the story of Paul Ryan lying about his marathon time will overshadow the fact...

...that he's a sociopath." -- Andy Borowitz

[BlueJazz]

4. Only thing Paul Ryan has created that was pretty cool was when he invented C=MC2.

...and wrote a book called "War and peace".

[central scrutinizer]

5. yellow seems an appropriate color for his jersey

yellow-bellied chicken hawk