Coatless Jim, Republican Corruption Fighter
Coatless Jim Jordan, Republican Corruption Fighter
http://www.smirkingchimp.com/node/87446
We've all seen a lot of Jim Jordan over the past several months. Many would say they had seen far too much of him. If you don't recognize the name, you'll know who I mean when I mention that he's the guy--a former wrestling coach--who always appears without a coat. A Republican wrestling coach in the U.S. congress? With a scandal around him about sexual misconduct with student wrestlers involved? Haven't we seen this movie before? Does the name Dennis Hastert ring a bell?
But Jim Jordan's troubles on that front aren't the issue here. I'm concerned about his coatlessness.
Perhaps we need to take up a collection to buy this pathetic specimen a coat. He's adopted this coatless look as a kind of bid for attention, a trademark, a "look," and it does set him apart from his scummy colleagues a little, but without allowing him to be distinctly different from any of the venal clowns and corrupt "conservatives" whose only claim to conserving anything is their laser-like focus on conserving most of the loot for the robbers who fund them and run them and pay 'em off. Coatless Jim has enough money to buy his own coat, of course, but Christmas is coming up and it might be rather liberal of us if we bought the son of a bitch a coat.
<<snip>>
But ya know, I think God may have given normal people a hint as to who and what Jim Jordan is. In fact, it seems to me that most all of these Republicans come wrapped in flesh that has been molded almost as if it were God's plan to tip us off to how rotten they are. Take, for instance, Stephen Miller. How could anyone miss the frank declaration of vileness his face proclaims? How would it be possible for anyone to misread the character of Mitch McConnell, a man with a face that screams out the word "corrupt"? What about that vile visage of shitty sanctimony stamped on Mike Pence's sycophantic mug? And is there a face from hell more obvious than the one we recognize as Kellyanne Conway,s? Really now, can you name a Republican who doesn't look like they'd been chosen by the world's best casting agent to portray concentration camp guards, quislings, thugs, or shysters in the ugliest movie ever made? They just look like what they turn out to be. Sean Spicer looks like a fool. Scaramucci looks like a slimeball. Sarah Huckabee Sanders looks thick and impenetrable. William Barr looks shifty. Jeff Sessions looks like he'd be the racist in a movie set in the south in the 1950s, though perhaps too on the nose. And what could I possibly say about what Rudy Giuliani's looks that his gargoyle face doesn't reveal about his character? C'mon, people, God or nature is trying to help us here. It's our job to just fuckin' look. They say, and it's surely true, that you can't tell a book by its cover. Except sometimes you can, and sometimes it's obvious. The trash tends to look like trash.
Nonetheless, we're mostly good liberals here, so let's get on that project of buying a coat for Coatless Jim. Maybe if he weren't frozen to the heart, he'd be less inclined to be such a prick.
= new reply since forum marked as read
That's exactly right!
Thanks for the laugh. I needed it.
we was...
jack it off in the gym!
