General Discussion

The DUzy Awards

(120 posts) Sat Jan 7, 2012, 10:01 PM Jan 2012

The DUzy Awards for the week of January 6, 2012 - Part 2

Last edited Fri Jan 13, 2012, 11:57 PM - Edit history (1)

[center][big][big][big]WELCOME to the NEW and IMPROVED™ DUZY AWARDS[/big][/big][/big]

Your (occastionally twice) weekly collection of LOL, WTF, *facepalm*, FAIL, ROFLMAO, and OMG that shows that DUers spent their alcohol dollar on quantity, not quality, over the New Year’s holiday!

This week’s improvement: easier-to-read format using nested excerpt boxes!

Note to the readers: do to a busy week, a LOT of nominations, and the discovery of “Canyon Defender 2” on the internet, this week’s awards will be a two-parter.

Note to mods: Your powers are still useless against me! Bwaa-ha-ha-ha-ha!

Note to Admins: Hey, since my real account has a star, can’t this one have one too?

[div class=excerpt style=background:#AFEEEE]In an original post by elleng

[big] Turnips: Versatile and Nutritious in Any Season[/big]
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/01/02/health/nutrition/turnips-versatile-and-nutritious-in-any-season-turnips-versatile-and-nutritious-in-any-season.html?src=twrhp

[div class=excerpt style=background:#FFFFFF][font color=#800080] eppur_se_muova [/font]
[big] 2. Aye, stock yer neeps in time for Burrrrrrns Night ! [/big]
http://www.google.com/search?q=neeps_and_tatties

Cooking & Baking, Jan 2, 2012
http://www.democraticunderground.com/11573017

[div class=excerpt style=background:#AFEEEE]Original post by [font color=#800080] pacalo [/font]

[big]*knock, knock, knockin' on Elad's door*[/big]

Elad: Ye-e-e-s-s-s?
pacalo: Now that the new year is about to begin ... ... will we be able to use our personal avatars ...:sofehide... in just a few more hours?

Elad: I just happen to be going through the components I might need to finish up that very project. There are only _ hour(s) left.

The shadows thank you.

H&M-D, Dec. 31, 2011
http://www.democraticunderground.com/124019067

[div class=excerpt style=background:#AFEEEE]In an original post by LoZoccolo

[big] I was next. (You Could Be Next Part 8)[/big]
This comment was seen in a jury decision that was made today. The post to which it applies, and the ultimate decision made by the jury, is perhaps a topic for another thread, but I want to focus on the case that they make for letting every personal attack stand, no matter what the nature is. The case made is a general case from the general behavior seen on DU, and does not make reference to the particular post in justifying the general abandonment of enforcement of standards against personal attacks.

Juror #6 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE and said: There was a time when personal attacks were considered bad form on DU. Not so much anymore. I've seen many personal attacks stand under the new jury system. If it is all about what kind of community members want then petty and personal back and forths from members who do not like each other or members who want to attack but not be attacked seems to be what many are aiming for with their constant tit for tat. So be it. Let it stand. This is not anyone's proudest hour.

This may illustrate that the behavior I forecasted, where people object to personal attacks, but let them go intentionally. It's not stated explicitly, but one could see that this decision is consistent with letting more ruckuses form on DU, in order that the incivility crescendoes and afterward, people have more respect for their responsibility to protect each other from personal attacks.

To pre-empt what is perhaps an inevitable objection to this thread, I will state ahead of time that I am not the "juror #6" who posted this, but rather the person who made the alert. I was next.

[div class=excerpt style=background:#FFFFFF][font color=#800080] Ohio Joe [/font]
[big]13. "This may illustrate" [/big]
Or... It may illustrate that abusing the alert system does not always get the results you want.

Or... It may illustrate a cherry picked quote.

Or... It may illustrate the proper way to cook a fish.

H&M-D, Jan 3, 2012
http://www.democraticunderground.com/124020457

[div class=excerpt style=background:#AFEEEE]In an original post by UrbScotty

[big] CAPTION: A hug from Rick Santorum![/big]

(Oh, and what the hell is with that stare from that guy in the red?)

[div class=excerpt style=background:#FFFFFF][font color=#800080] Skittles [/font]
[big]1. .[/big]

GD, Jan 3, 2012
http://www.democraticunderground.com/1002113951

[div class=excerpt style=background:#AFEEEE]In an original post by Kadie

[big] Female sea lion helps clean her room - pics[/big]
[font color=#FF0000]Cute pic of a seal holding a garden hose for her trainer[/font]

Female sea lion Sarasa helps a trainer to clearn her room at the Shinagawa Aquastadium aquarium in Tokyo on December 28, 2011. The aquarium is carrying out year-end general cleaning of their facilities.

[font color=#FF0000]Two more adorable pics of the seal with the hose[/font]

[div class=excerpt style=background:#FFFFFF][font color=#800080] Bucky [/font]

[big]1. This is bad [/big]
That dude is training his own replacement. Soon the sea lion will learn how to clean up without him and that lazy bastard MBA who's running the zoo will fire the human and make the sea lion work for free.

The Lounge, Jan 2, 2012
http://www.democraticunderground.com/101822926

[div class=excerpt style=background:#AFEEEE]Original post by [font color=#800080] salvorhardin [/font]

[big] The wombat’s cubic poop is one of nature’s weirdest superpowers[/big]
Wombat poo contains only "the finest grass particles."

My next business shall be selling a natural remedy made of cubic wombat scat. I shall call it John Cuscat. A CGI Scatman Crothers will be my spokesman.

Every evening, your average wombat deposits 80 to 100 dry, cube-like droppings around its territory. This nocturnal marsupial unloads four to eight of these 2-centimeter wide feces every time it pauses to excrete.

This panoply of square droppings isn't just evolution evincing a sense of potty humor. No, the wombats' many odiferous turds help the animal mark its territory and recognize new, potential mates. So yes, wombat's mating process is not unlike some of the most frightening pornography on the internet.

...

And here's a lovely video courtesy of Robyn Lawrence, who created a model of a wombat's digestive tract and colon. In her demonstration, she squeezes jelly wombat turds out of the artificial organs in an attempt to explain how the marsupial's anatomy produces this square scat. I'm guessing that fake wombat colon is a real smash at dinner parties

Link: http://io9.com/5872472/the-wombats-cubic-poop-is-one-of-natures-weirdest-superpowers

[font color=#FF0000]I’m not going to touch this with a 10-foot Pole… or a 12-foot Lithuanian, for that matter. Everybody who replied gets a DUzy and a wet-wipe![/font]

Science, Jan 2, 2012
http://www.democraticunderground.com/1228876

[div class=excerpt style=background:#AFEEEE]In an original post by Dragonbreathp9d

[big] I am currently in th Ron Paul headquarters in Austin[/big]
Watching the caucuses and making waves- sharing my beliefs (and the Daily Kos Ron Paul Hates You piece). Twil be interesting

[div class=excerpt style=background:#FFFFFF][font color=#800080] Fire Walk With Me [/font]
[big] 9. I'm in ur headquarterz, stealing ur nominashunz[/big]

GD, Jan 3, 2012
http://www.democraticunderground.com/1002114239

[div class=excerpt style=background:#AFEEEE]Original post by [font color=#800080] EarlG [/font]

[big] Pic Of The Moment: GOP Frontrunners Make Closing Arguments In Iowa[/big]

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10164637

Video&Multimedia, Jan 3, 2012
http://sync.democraticunderground.com/10174378

[div class=excerpt style=background:#AFEEEE]In an original post by Fire Walk With Me

[big] Caption this pic of Perry:[/big]

[div class=excerpt style=background:#FFFFFF][font color=#800080] KansDem [/font]
[big] 7. "...And my head I'd be scratchin', While my thoughts were busy hatchin', If I only had a brain." [/big]

Video&Multimedia, Jan 4, 2012
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10174719

[div class=excerpt style=background:#AFEEEE]In an original post by laconicsax

[big] ATTN: Juror #5[/big]
Juror #5 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE and said: so the person called the other guy a shit for brains asshole. i dont see the big deal.

[div class=excerpt style=background:#FFFFFF][font color=#800080] pintobean [/font]
[big] 16. I've had issues with Juror #5 [/big]
on many occasions. Both as an alerter, and as a fellow juror.
[div class=excerpt style=background:#FFFFFF][font color=#800080] MilesColtrane [/font]
[big] 18. Perhaps the Admins can make is so that every Juror #5 is preemptively banned upon selection. [/big]
View profile
...as an example to the rest of the Jury.

You know, just to keep their asses in line.
[div class=excerpt style=background:#FFFFFF][font color=#800080] scarletwoman [/font]
[big] 20. Banning seems a little harsh. Maybe they should just be made to wear a scarlet #5 on their sig line. [/big]

H&M-D, Jan 3, 2012
http://www.democraticunderground.com/124021248

[div class=excerpt style=background:#AFEEEE]In an original post by Festivito

[big] I had trouble getting DU3 to work tonight. DU2 worked, with some problems.[/big]
After trying another reload, DU3 started working again, just this minute. Here's a link to my DU2 troubleshooting in case it might be helpful:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=439x2473663

Good night.

[div class=excerpt style=background:#FFFFFF][font color=#800080] Behind the Aegis [/font]
[big] 3. Thank G-d for free gay porn sites! [/big]
Down for an hour and 20 mins for me.
[div class=excerpt style=background:#FFFFFF][font color=#800080] Dead_Parrot [/font]
[big] 5. Surely you mean "up for an hour and 20 mins", then? [/big]

[div class=excerpt style=background:#FFFFFF][font color=#800080] Behind the Aegis [/font]
[big] 6. I didn't say it was good porn! [/big]

H&M-D, Jan 4, 2012
http://www.democraticunderground.com/124022400

[div class=excerpt style=background:#AFEEEE]In an original post by HipChick

[big] What is wrong with McCain's face?[/big]
I noticed today that the right side of his face is all red..anyone know what happened?

[div class=excerpt style=background:#FFFFFF][font color=#800080] rug [/font]
[big] 4. It covers his brain. [/big]

[font color=#FF0000]More snark in the thread![/font]

GD, Jan 4, 2012
http://www.democraticunderground.com/1002120854

[div class=excerpt style=background:#AFEEEE]In an original post by Ruby the Liberal

[big] I Wanna Be Next (Part 42)[/big]
Okay, no hidden posts yet, so I need to step up my game because I am feeling left out and I want to be next.

Bigotry, sexism, racism, homophobia, general diversity, trash talking, generic flamebaits and callouts, transparency demands on suspected paid posts, the lack of a Buddhism forum - all are done. to. death.

I have never been juror #6 or 5, don't really care how many people sit on a jury for that matter, and don't currently use Ignore.

Help a girl out, fellow members - lets make this happen.

Where hasn't the H&M Fight Club gone yet?

[div class=excerpt style=background:#FFFFFF][font color=#800080] scarletwoman [/font]
[big] 55. "...Everyone was terrified of Ruby." [/big]
"I've seen grown men pull their own heads off rather than see Ruby. Even Dinsdale was frightened of Ruby."

"What did she do?"

"She used... sarcasm. She knew all the tricks, dramatic irony, metaphor, bathos, puns, parody, litotes and... satire. She was vicious."

H&M-D, Jan 5, 2012
http://www.democraticunderground.com/124023050

[div class=excerpt style=background:#AFEEEE]Original post by [font color=#800080] Warren Stupidity [/font]

[big] A JUrY LEts This Alone!!!,!!![/big]
Can you believes this?

REASON FOR ALERT:

This post is disruptive, hurtful, rude, insensitive, over-the-top, or otherwise inappropriate. (See <a href="http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=aboutus#communitystandards" target="_blank">Community Standards</a>.)

ALERTER'S COMMENTS:

We're allowed to use pancake monkeys as avatars now? What is wrong with you?

You served on a randomly-selected Jury of DU members which reviewed this post. The review was completed at Thu Jan 5, 2012, 5:27 PM, and the Jury voted 3-3 to LEAVE IT.

Juror #1 voted to HIDE IT and said: this is a tragedy. I wanted to go to Olive Garden and smoke immediately after reading this.
Juror #2 voted to HIDE IT and said: I've seen worse; I once saw a large dark shape. I don't know what it was.
Juror #3 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE and said: What is wrong with Juror #1?
Juror #4 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE and said: Thd idiot who alerted on this should go die in a pit of fire.
Juror #5 voted to HIDE IT and said: I agree with the alerter, this is not the type of thing we should be seeing on DU.
Juror #6 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE and said: if we ban pancake monkey avatars pretty soon we will be marrying penguins.

Link: http://www.democraticunderground.com/124023050

[font color=#FF0000]Everybody in the first 15 posts gets a DUzy! Especially enjoy the visual aids in the thread! [/font]

H&M-D, Jan 5, 2012
http://www.democraticunderground.com/124023092

[div class=excerpt style=background:#AFEEEE]In a locked original post by i was a cathar

[big] I never trusted him.[/big]
I have been vindicated. I knew I would be.

[div class=excerpt style=background:#FFFFFF][font color=#800080] grantcart [/font]
[big] 13. Another blind date with Cliffordu goes up in smoke. [/big]

GD, Jan 6, 2012
http://www.democraticunderground.com/1002130161

[div class=excerpt style=background:#AFEEEE]In an original post by CaliforniaPeggy

[big] There is a knee replacement in my not-too-distant future... [/big]
Went to see my orthopedic MD today for a routine check...

My left knee is bad, and not getting better.

He thinks it's time to replace it.

I agree.

Next week, I go see the surgeon...

Stay tuned.

A few vibes would be really REALLY appreciated!

[div class=excerpt style=background:#FFFFFF][font color=#800080] trof [/font]
[big] 42. Oh, so NOW you wish you'd taken better care of your knees, hunh? [/big]
But Nooooo, you just swanned about through life, abusing your knees as you liked.
No thought for the rest of us who'll now have to pick up the tab to fix YOUR precious knee with socialized MEDICARE.
And I'm sure we'll have to pay the freight for your lengthy frou-frou pampered 'rehab'.
Prolly lounging around in some ritzy Arizona spa.
Caviar and lobster fricassee.
A personal trainer.
Massages.
Harumph.

OK, freeper: off.
Seriesly sweetie, all the best.
You'll love your new knee.

I'm hoping mine outlive me, but you never know.

[font color=#FF0000]We all wish CaliPeg the best. My dad had it done November before last, and after a few months, he’s very happy he did it. But… it was a long few months!!![/font]

The Lounge, Jan 6, 2012
http://www.democraticunderground.com/101826354

Much thanks to: eridani, gateley, dixiegrrrrl, ScreamingMeemie, Fire Walk With Me, rocktivity, BlancheSplanchnik, pinboy3niner, scarletwoman, and hootinholler.

Annnnnnnd… I’m spent.

Submitted with my mom talking baby-talk to the cat on the bed behind me,

-Krispos42