Too bad Paul Lynde is gone. He could have been Mitt's debate coach. Maybe We could at least have some laughs.
Some examples:
Peter Marshall: Will a goose help warn you if there's an intruder on your property?
Paul Lynde: There's no better way!
Peter Marshall: In "Alice in Wonderland", who kept crying "I'm late, I'm late?"
Paul Lynde: Alice, and her mother is sick about it.
Peter Marshall: In the Middle Ages, Paul, people in convents were not allowed to eat beans because they believed something about them we now know isn't true. What?
Paul Lynde: Well, I know they took a vow of silence...
Peter Marshall: Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?
Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.
Peter Marshall: According to the French Chef, Julia Child, how much is a pinch?
Paul Lynde: Just enough to turn her on...
Peter Marshall: True or false, the navy has trained whales to recover objects a mile deep.
Paul Lynde: At first they tried unsuccessfully with cocker spaniels...
Peter Marshall: When you pat a dog on its head he will usually wag his tail. What will a goose do?
Paul Lynde: Make him bark.
Peter Marshall: Is it possible For the puppies in a litter to have more than one daddy?
Paul Lynde: Why, that bitch!
Peter Marshall: Paul, is there such a thing as a female rooster?
Paul Lynde: Yeah, they're the ones who just go "a doodle doo!"
Peter Marshall: Paul, true or false. Occasionally, a bull moose will hear the horn of diesel train and will run to it thinking that it is its lover?
Paul Lynde: And heaven help the conductor!
I will end with a political one:
Peter Marshall: Now listen carefully, Paul...during the time of the hula hoop, the yo-yo, and Davy Crockett hats, who was in the White House?
Paul Lynde: I'll say the yo-yo.
Happy Monday morning, DUers!
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