What do you when your father invites you out to dinner and you're held hostage

[no_hypocrisy]

while he spews about how much Obama makes him sick, that he can't bear to watch him on TV but he's all over the place? You want to enter into a spirited debate but the location is just wrong. And you'll never win the argument even if the time and place were right. It's like having FOX on TV but you can't change the channel. What do you do under these circumstances?





You order the most expensive thing on the menu, that's what you do.

[porphyrian]

1. With no expression on your face, walk up to him and urinate on his leg.

Without saying a word, when you finish, leave.

[no_hypocrisy]

4. Considering everything, I think my choice of the venison medallions was the better choice.

[porphyrian]

10. To each their own. n/t

[RedSpartan]

13. This exchange ^^^

Made me laugh so hard my side hurts. Hilarious.

[porphyrian]

20. ...

[likesmountains 52]

38. and order a second entree to take home for later..

[CrispyQ]

53. ~lol.

My Mom did that once when I took her out to lunch. It was just three tacos, but when we got home, she fed them to her dogs! My husband & I still laugh about that.

[Blue Idaho]

2. Stand Up - Walk Out

Do not participate in his child abuse if you can help it.

[TheMadMonk]

40. Order the most expensive thing on the menu THEN get up and leave. /nt

[GoCubsGo]

50. Also, the most expensive bottle of wine on the menu.

And, when it comes, don't share.

I'm really lucky. Dinners with my dad are a lot like that, except that he bitches about republicans.

[mazzarro]

54. D-I-T-T-O!

I will not allow myself to be abused that way, without showing any clear disapproval.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

3. Refuse to go. Period.

[catbyte]

5. order 2 lobsters, lol

I feel your pain.

[MindMover]

5. Sounds like you experienced the same thing Obama did ...

except Obama probably went back to the hotel that night and got laid .... better than a dinner ...

[LiberalAndProud]

7. Good plan.

What was the most expensive thing on the menu? I'm hungry.

[no_hypocrisy]

8. I had to choose between the quail and the venison. I chose the latter.

[LiberalAndProud]

15. I hope you remembered to thank him for dinner.

And try not to be mean to him when Obama is elected to a second term. It will be painful for him.


I'm still hungry. Were the medallions tasty?

[no_hypocrisy]

39. Extremely tasty, thank you

[Kookaburra]

23. I hope you ordered drinks

AND dessert. You deserved them.

[Indpndnt]

29. Lol! Should've ordered both. And dessert.

And lots of drinks. Doesn't mean you have to drink them.

If he complains about all the food you ordered, remind him that, according to him, the economy is bad. You're just storing food away for hard times. Then tell him he should sign up for Arabic classes at the local college before there's a waiting list. He'll need to learn the language when Obama wins and we come for his guns, bible, Christmas nativity scene, and money. His ability to reason for himself we'll take care of in the re-education camps.

[DrewFlorida]

9. "Dad, I am a staunch supporter of Barrack Obama, stop spreading false information about him.

Honesty is the best policy! If nothing else your Dad will know where you stand, and then choose to respect your position or not.

[whistler162]

11. Before or After I get over the fainting spell

from his ashes reassembling themselves and coming back to life?

Ask him to cut the politics so you two can enjoy your time together, and order something expensive.

[Skip Intro]

12. You realize you should be thankful for the time you have

with your father, and find a way to change the subject if it bothers you that much.

That's what I'd do, anyway.

[flamingdem]

14. Tell him you have just a month to live

and would rather not discuss politics

[Bucky]

59. Whoa, if I only had a month, I'd try to hang on until early voting started.

But seriously, as ironic as it sounds, lying is not the best method to worm your way into a Republican's heart.

[Mz Pip]

16. Don't engage in the conversation

And don't respond to the monologue. He probably already knows how you feel and just wants to push you buttons.

That's what I would do on a public place. Just ignore it and try to enjoy the food.

[no_hypocrisy]

17. Exactly

[LittlestStar]

18. I have the same issue with my mom. We have just politely decided not to discuss politics.

Doesn't sound like that's much of an option with your dad though. If I was you I would say "No more political talk since we have a massive, insurmountable disagreement" and I would add that you would like to remain on good terms with him but that listening to his rants makes that extremely difficult. Hopefully he will realize you are more important than his rages.

I miss my dad so much! He was a liberal and a huge Clinton fan.

[darkangel218]

26. Im so sorry about your dad LittlestStar x

[LittlestStar]

37. Me too, and thank you.

[HipChick]

19. Order the 16oz Filet Migon and Lobster tail

Expensive wine, and dessert...

[begin_within]

24. Best answer

[RKP5637]

28. Damn that sounds good! Makes the hamburger I just had crappy! n/t

[awake]

21. my Dad who is now 92 and had never voted for a Dem. in his life voted for Obama

last time. He use to watch fox news all day but no more, he will vote for Obama again, so there is always hope. Hang in there and don't give up. Good luck

[LaydeeBug]

22. Nope. Respectfully add facts into the mix and pick up the check. nt

[Hoyt]

25. Tell him if he keeps it up he'll be talking to "empty chair."

I also agree with poster above - be glad for time you have with him if he's otherwise a good dad.

[RKP5637]

27. If you have to endure it, might as well eat exceptionally well and enjoy the meal! n/t

[Peepsite]

30. If he's rich,nod and agree. If he's not, start looking for a long term care facility.

[MH1]

52. ^^^ This is actually excellent advice. Well, the last part anyway.

If you really can't stand your parent(s), make sure there's a plan for when they can't take care of themselves.

I think "nod and agree" might only be good advice if a) the listener is poor and b) there is a reasonable expectation of extracting money from the dad. Still, I probably wouldn't go for it myself.

[geckosfeet]

31. You're right. Most expensive items (one for tonight, one for tomorrow) on the menu - TO GO PLEASE!

[OldDem2012]

32. Now you know how the President felt the other night....

....just by his facial expressions I could tell Obama wanted step over and kick Mitt right square in the nuts.

Many years ago I went through the same process with my WWII veteran Dad over the Vietnam War. I never responded to him in public, but I did let him know pretty forcefully how I felt in private. Let me tell you, those were some heated discussions!

A few years later, after my first year in college, I told him I was going to enlist in the Navy because so many of my friends had been drafted and I felt bad about them going to war and me sitting back in college. To my complete surprise, Dad told me from what he was hearing that the Vietnam War was really screwed up and he didn't want me going. He told me he had fought in WWII, and Vietnam was not that kind of war. He convinced me not to enlist, even though I did go into the military after I finished college.

I guess what I'm trying to say is time softens a lot of personal beliefs and political positions. Don't let any of that get between you and your Dad.

[JoeyT]

33. You could always do what I did to mine.

Every morning for a while my dad looked like he informed on a mafia don and was hunting the pipe bomb that would keep him from testifying.

What he was actually hunting were the Obama stickers that kept popping up on his truck. He finally got the hint and doesn't pester me about politics.

I gave up on convincing him Obama isn't a terrible dictator early on, so I settled for annoying him until he left me alone about it.

[Indpndnt]

35. About this...

Oh, well done!

[Robyn66]

43. That is awesome

i could enjoy two things he hates, Obama and bumper stickers

[tavernier]

34. Next time at dinner...

Tell him that you have meditated on his wise words and have decided to follow his example. Tell him that you have joined that NRA and are building an arsenal in your back yard to protect you from the liberal hordes that are trying to take over our country. You've constructed a bunker and are stocking it with rifles, hand grenades and a variety of miscellaneous artillery. Be sure to wear camouflage pants, a wife beater shirt, and a Rambo head band. Give your waiter suspicious glances and ask dad, "What do you think? Is he one of them?" Then make a Dirty Harry gun gesture and whisper, "Pow!"

That ought to do it.

[Zalatix]

36. I'd get up and walk out.

[Robyn66]

41. Hello long lost sibling

My father is exactly the same way, although I don't even get a free lunch out of him.

I don't call or deal with him at all right now. The president is the root of all evil to him. He believes that there are death panels and he has been subjected to them he believes Obama has cut his social security, is at fault for every job lost every lay off. Funny story, my husband's company had a lay-off. This was a real studied surgical lay off where the real dead wood was removed so the company could do its best and keep everyone else employed. So these folks had over a year's warning about their job performance being substandard and they still weren't doing the job. Well according to my father, this was Obama's fault too.

So if I am in the unfortunate position of having to talk to him and he starts, I very firmly say I am not going to discuss politics, and if he continues, I get off the phone. And if I was in person I would just say, "You know what Dad, you have a right to your opinion but I strongly disagree, so you either let it go or I am going home."

Then I just don't answer the phone if he calls.

There is no "debate" with my Teabagger Glen Beck loving father who refers to the president as "That N-" So I keep my visits few and far between.

[no_hypocrisy]

44. Isn't it awful? He believes everything he hears on FOX.

Actually I had stereo at dinner: my BIL wholly agreed with Dad.

[Robyn66]

61. What strikes me is that during their lives

they had to use some form of critical thinking. Yet their common sense has left them. Plus I think the racism componant is unavoidable.

[Barack_America]

42. "I'd rather not ruin our dinner together with politics".

And THEN you order the most expensive thing on the menu!

[a la izquierda]

45. Sorry friend...

My family is very conservative, but they don't like debating the professor. I'm a history prof, but they know I take politics seriously and have time to read and watch widely.
My mom will make digs at the president, but usually one verbal evisceration brings the conversation back around to sports or something else.

[newspeak]

69. my family loves debating

but we're all democrats. However, my dad and I butted heads when I was younger over vietnam and civil rights (he was more of a democrat for labor rights). he'd spew these off the wall percentages and I'd calmly ask him where he came up with the numbers and it would be from some magazine or paper he couldn't remember. if you're dealing in facts, it's easy for someone to change the subject when they have none; however, complete unfocused, emotional prejudice; well, it's hard to change a feeling.

I would inform him that you want to enjoy your time with him and have a good meal; not be bombarded with such vile emotion.

[B Calm]

46. Should have changed the converstion to Wall Street

and asked him how his investments are doing since Obama has been in office, compaired to how well they done under republican presidents.

[Are_grits_groceries]

47. If you still have a decent relationship with your Dad politics aside,

I would order the most expensive thing on the menu and keep my mouth full. Then I would just mumble nonsensical answers.
If he is at all amenable, you could try to bring him around on a point or two. If not, don't bother. It will just give you heartburn.
If Faux News is ever on at some place such as the Dr's office, I zone out.
An alternative is to lie and tell him you have seen the light and have switched parties. That brings another set of challenges.

[no_hypocrisy]

48. You must have been sitting at our table. That's exactly how it played out (the first scenario).

[lynne]

49. Change the subject and be thankful that you have a father -

- who is alive and wants to spend some time with you.

While I didn't agree with my father on politics, I'd give most anything to have dinner with him one more time. He's been dead 11 years this month.

[no_hypocrisy]

51. I'm sorry for your loss. My father and I don't enjoy a close relationship.

[Caretha]

55. Timing is everthing.....

Order the most expensive thing on the menu (doesn't matter if you like it or not). Go to the bathroom and call a friend on your cell phone...explain to them you need them to call you away for an emergency in say 15 minutes, or when you think your meal will be served.

Go back, and just listen to him rant on. He believes that by buying you dinner & because he's your father he has a captive audience, and you owe him. You don't. When your meal is served take a bite out of everything and mess up your plate. When the call comes from your friend, say...OMG....I'll be right there! Wipe your mouth, stand up and say, "Dad I have to go immediately, a friend needs me right now....I'll explain later". Night & thanks for dinner."

[slackmaster]

56. My dad had much better manners than to ever do such a thing no matter how badly we disagreed

[Aerows]

57. You argue with him vehemently

until he backs of on his position, and then every time you see him afterward, you argue with him vehemently every time he brings up politics, until he stops bringing up politics. I worked in my family. Nobody wants to discuss politics with me anymore because I've eviscerated their arguments enough times that they have figured out it is pointless.

Other than that, you can also state plainly "I didn't come out tonight to discuss politics, I came because I wanted to spend quality time with you, and enjoy a meal with you. If that isn't what your goal is here this evening, then I will be happy to call a cab and leave you to your dinner."

[Bucky]

58. No one can win a debate against their parents. Who the hell would want to?

If you did win, you'd probably feel worse that if you lost.

The best response is to say, "Oh, you know that's not true" and change the subject to why you haven't given him any grandkids yet. I mean, what the hell are you waiting for?

[Aerows]

60. It's a form of trying to bully you

into accepting a political position that you disagree with. "I disagree" and letting the conversation move on is one thing, but some folks won't leave it alone and try to badger you.

I endure that ONCE. I was at dinner with my aunt and uncle and parents, and my uncle came up with every vile thing imaginable to say about gay people, all the while knowing that I'm gay. I said nothing. I swore to myself once that dinner was over that it was the LAST time I would ever be subjected to listening to someone disrespect me merely because they held me hostage to politeness.

That was 18 years ago. I haven't done it since, and I won't do it now for anyone. It doesn't mean you be rude, it means that you be assertive that you will not be badgered on your positions for the sake of "keeping the peace". It's not peaceful whatsoever for the person that endures such badgering.

[treestar]

62. I recently had one similar experience

Said it's always rude to bring up politics, as people don't agree. Talk about something else. Especially now that we have the internet, where one can discuss politics and gets one's fix on that without having to annoy people in face to face conversations.

[Aerows]

65. Religion and Politics

are two conversation topics that nobody can ever agree on, and I've always shunned discussing them, especially at the office or places where I don't know people very well.

It's guaranteed to piss someone off, and change no one's mind.

[treestar]

66. True and that's been known to be the case for ages

In my general experience, liberals recognize that and respect it. This election especially, right wingers can't seem to keep it in.

My sister was stuck in a car with our aunt for a long drive and trapped there listening to her right wing rant. This particular woman must be crushed to have a black President and she trashed him for a long ride.

Yet we are so polite - that's why I spoke up. Now if they are going to annoy me by bringing it up, I at least let them know they are not going to bully me into their one sided lectures. If someone on Facebook "likes" Rmoney, I "like" an Obama post.

[progressivebydesign]

63. Frankly, I'd walk out. If a parent can't act like a decent person during dinner... you just leave.

Then you tell them that if they want to spend time with you again, NO politics. Then I'd get a DNA test.

[Glitterati]

64. Refuse any more dinners

I worked for years and years to establish a family tradition around the holidays, cooked for days, had sleepover with the little ones to teach them how to bake and decorate holiday goodies, put on a huge spread.

Until I just had enough disrespect. You don't show up late to dinner. You don't show your ass just because everyone is there. You don't disrespect your host.

And, they did it all.

But, when they sat down at MY table and started a political argument, that was THE END.

They can take THEIR disrespectful BS and shove it.

[Honeycombe8]

67. "Dad, this is an inappropriate discussion for dinner. You know you and I don't see eye to eye

on politics. So why don't we agree not to discuss things that we know will cause strife, and stick to more pleasant, less controversial topics?"

You'll look like the adult. He'll look silly. You win.

[Ikonoklast]

68. I feel for you. When I go over to Mom and Dad's I can't get my Dad to stop complaining

about what a rich turd like Romney knows about having to actually work for a living, never having to struggle to pay one bill his entire life, Romney will destroy Medicare and throw every retired person into bankruptcy over medical bills, how he and that punk Ryan's only real plan is to steal every single thing that isn't nailed down in this country from the poor and working people and give it to other rich guys like themselves...


I mean, it gets tiresome.

I can only say, "I know Dad, I know..." so many times in one evening.