BROKEN: Memo from Pentagon to Donald J. Trump

[MineralMan]

Mr. President,

Due to the COVID-19 pandemic, we will be unable to provide you with the traditional presidential farewell ceremony on January 20. All such events are cancelled until all personnel receive both COVID-19 vaccine injections. Unfortunately, not enough vaccine has been available to immunize all personnel. The pandemic is adversely affecting readiness, so we are taking all possible precautions. We know you will understand.

We will, of course, provide necessary services to speed you on your way to Florida.

[malaise]

1. I wish I wish I wish!

[Budi]

2. Wish it wasn't a joke post. 🥂

It is what they SHOULD tell him.

21 gun salute & a Red Carpet extit is what he requested as of this morning.

They should just call Jared to come pick him up at the side door of the WH. 🤬

[DBoon]

6. i'd go with a 21 gun salute

If they used 21 fart blasters as the guns:

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

3. I wish they'd FedEx him to Florida in a crate.

[MineralMan]

7. A Capital Idea!

[Mopar151]

4. What is he departing on?

Is his own plane picking him up😋

[MineralMan]

8. Maybe they'll fly him in a jump seat on a very noisy cargo plane.

Offer him a cold bologna and cheese sandwich in flight. That's what I'd suggest.

[captain queeg]

5. If he is planning on flying away on AF1 better get there by noon

If he is in route at time they should just land at the nearest airport and kick his fat ass out on the tarmac. I'd pay money to see that.

[MineralMan]

9. Wouldn't It Be Nice?

[Takket]

10. they also attached this gif.......

[MineralMan]

11. Perfect!

[BobTheSubgenius]

12. It seemed just a smidgen too flippant to have come off the desk of a Pentagon general.

Story checks out, though.

[George II]

13. Wouldn't that be great?