Florida man arrested in Capitol riot said he was breaking into White House

[Rustyeye77]

A family member turned in an Ocala man who went to Washington D.C. “knowing full well they were going to break in” to the U.S. Capitol on Jan. 6, according to the U.S. Justice Department.

Kenneth Kelly, 58, also sent text messages saying he entered the Capitol by breaking windows, an affidavit said. He turned himself in Friday at the Middle District of Florida U.S. Attorney’s Office in Ocala. He’s facing charges including disorderly and disruptive conduct in a restricted building or grounds and disorderly conduct on Capitol grounds.

Pictures from surveillance video and text messages provided to the FBI show Kelly inside the Capitol, which he kept referring to as the White House, the affidavit said.

“Inside the White house via breaking in windows,” a text message said. “Tree of liberty was watered today.”

https://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/breaking-news/os-ne--20210424-7mmtlfn5rrcqjioccfrqyvbnra-story.html

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#1. Real einstein....." I dought iI wuz in da white houz"
#2. His familly turned him in ??
#3 At least it will make the other prisoners laugh for a while

[Hortensis]

1. Sounds like he was one of those who peed on the floor in an excess of patriotism.

[Baitball Blogger]

5. The same image came to mind.

I don't know too many living things that thrive on urination. But, it does have a nifty ring to a Republican utopia. We'll call it, Yuri-nation, since they do seem to have a thing for Russia.

[Hortensis]

11. :) Their Yuri-nation and defecation are ancient hostile behaviors.

Reminds me of one of the less stupid looking insurrectionists yelling at others in the chamber to stop what they were doing and remember they were supposed to be patriots.

[RandiFan1290]

2. Heard many others say this as well.

They had no idea where they were.

Most of the morons that broke into the Senate were bragging that they "sat in Pelosi's chair"

[TheBlackAdder]

18. So these dumbasses were actually trying to attack Trump, after being at his White Power Party?

[RandiFan1290]

21. They don't know the difference

Big white building = White House.

Brawndo has what plants crave.

[intheflow]

3. Hi family turned him and he also turned himself in?

Proofreading and coherent writing are lost skills.

[csziggy]

7. I suspect that the family identified him to authorities

Then when he found out he had charges pending, he turned himself in to those authorities.

So his family ratted him out and he or his lawyer got him to the authorities.

[RussellCattle]

12. "His" family.

[Irish_Dem]

4. He didn't know the difference between the White House and the Capitol building?

Some of these people are not bright or educated.

[Zambero]

8. Yes, and also unable to differentiate shite from shinola

Not too bright and not quite right. As Trump himself has said, he loves his uneducateds!

[Warpy]

19. You're dating yourself

Few of us remember the Shinola cans on Gramps's dresser.

I looked them up, they're now a company making watches, sold at Nordstrom among other upper middle class places.

[Kingofalldems]

37. I used Shinola.

[Warpy]

39. My dad was a Kiwi man

I used gesso and a little gloss medium on white hospital shoes in the mid 60s. I wore running shoes in the 80s-2000s and the occasional trip through the wash did it for them.

[Rustyeye77]

9. I *ALMOST * feel sorry for him.

Going thru life that stupid must be difficult.

[rickford66]

13. Actually it's very easy apparently.

[bullwinkle428]

6. This kind of shit will put "The Onion" and Borowitz out of business!

[keithsw]

10. That's how fucking stupid

These Moron's are. I guarantee 90% of them thought the same thing

[Captain Zero]

15. Anyone think he could pass a citizenship test?

I'll bet the rent money against it with this guy.

[Progressive Jones]

16. The level of stupidity on the Right Wing never ceases to amaze.

[ancianita]

17. Anyone complicit with planned sedition conspirator of sedition. These damn charges are too soft.

disorderly and disruptive conduct in a restricted building or grounds and disorderly conduct -- those are bullshit misdemeanors -- reflecting the pro-white Republican bias of the Ocala US Attorney, Ocala being the KKK center of Florida.

Not a goddam thing is going to happen to Florida insurrectionists.

[Warpy]

20. I find this appallin level of ignorance common among conservatives

and they wonder why we think they're stupid.

It seems the only freedom they want to preserve is the freedom from knowing anything that doesn't make them money.

[bahboo]

22. well..in his defense....

the Capitol building is white after all. I am of course, kidding...

[SergeStorms]

23. You had me at, "Florida man".

There wasn't any reason to read beyond that point, unless you wanted to know the specifics of the ignorance and depravity.

[2naSalit]

24. +1

[Traildogbob]

26. Really!!!

Nothing is surprising after a sentence starts with Florida Man.
I keep seeing these commercials for “Ultimate Disco Cruise com.” Leaving from Florida, the Petri dish of Covid.DeSantas wants all Florida Cruise lines fully operating. He is the “Ultimate Florida Man”
Disco Cruise????From Florida????what the hell could go wrong. End of Days, (for participants) Covid, Sea Sick, and...Disco!!!
😵😩😱😱
What foreign port would allow a ship full of American Maskholes into their country?
Full of Old Florida Men.

[mac2766]

31. I've lived in Florida for about 30 years now.

Are you talking about me? Are you calling me ignorant and depraved? You know... since I live in Florida and all.

[SergeStorms]

35. Have you ever had a news story written about yourself...

that starts off with "Florida man"? No? Then this has nothing to do with you. Surely you've heard the endless stories about "Florida man"? There's even a website or two devoted to the phenomenon.
My advice, calm down, and stop looking for things about which to be outraged.

[mac2766]

36. Not outraged at all.

You may be though.

You seem to be a bigot. "Florida Man", "Pollack", "N...", "G...", "T...", ... etc... Just group whomever you want to group together and take your shots. That's what you do as a bigot. It's not cool to take shots at "N's", or "G's", or "T's", but it's okay to take shots at "Florida Man" so you do. Stay alert, once "Florida Man" is no longer cool to take shots at, there will be some other group. You can take shots at the group once it's "okay" to take shots at that group.

It's all the same. "Florida Man" seems to be one of the latest groups that people believe it's okay to take shots at. It's just another group. You're no different than those that you believe are racist.

[SergeStorms]

40. Call the police....

because someone has certainly stolen your sense of humor. I've never seen someone make such a mountain out of a molehill. Have a nice day, if that's at all possible.

[Lochloosa]

42. I'm a true Floridian. 63 years. I know what "Florida Man" means cause I know plenty of them.

Hold my beer......

[Luciferous]

33. Lol

[lambchopp59]

25. When it comes to these "gimme liberty or gimme death" goofballs...

Methinks death has some catching up to do.

[BobTheSubgenius]

27. It's a wonder he found his way to DC.

Maybe a helpful friend pinned a note to his jacket.

[Pepsidog]

28. How do you fight this level of ignorance from a group of people who control the electoral map and a

majority of State legislative houses. We should be very worried because it’s these people who electing the Qgop and pushing oppressive state election laws. We all know how diluted the democratic vote is already and it will get worse unless we can kill the filibuster and fix the structural inequities that threaten to make permanent minority rule. We are not just fighting the poorly educated and ignorant voters, it’s the conditioning of their minds from 30 years of Fox and RW media. I live in NJ a solidly blue state and even here I run into quite a few fellow attorneys who are good smart lawyers but support Republicans. I ask them can’t you see how Trump is undermining our democracy and they just don’t get it. I remember being shocked at learning one of my attorney friends was supporting Romney over Obama. The first thing he said was Obama wouldn’t produce his college grades. I looked at him with disbelief and said you really are talking about Obama’s college records? That is an example of what Fox and Limbaugh has done to millions of Republican voters and how they have divided this country.

[catbyte]

29. LOL

Dear Traitor:

[DallasNE]

30. Why Would He Break Into The Whitehouse

At a time when Trump was the occupant? What a doozy loser this guy is.

[LetMyPeopleVote]

32. trump supporters are very very stupid people

[Rustyeye77]

34. Kelly is the one on the right

The guy on the left is his seeing eye dog.

https://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=&imgrefurl=https://deadstate.org/florida-man-who-stormed-the-capitol-thought-he-was-inside-the-white-house/&tbnid=bxKtkTtEXC6k6M&vet=1&docid=guJR3ARHe3GtCM&w=800&h=430&itg=1&hl=en&source=sh/x/im

[lpbk2713]

38. Kirk Douglas called.

He wants his chin back.

[Bucky]

41. Maybe he's preparing a "stupidity defense"