Fauci Urges Americans to Use COVID as Excuse to Skip Thanksgiving with Horrible Relatives
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—As an event dreaded by millions draws near, Dr. Anthony Fauci is urging all Americans to use covid-19 as an excuse to skip Thanksgiving with horrible relatives.
Speaking from his office at the National Institutes of Health, Fauci said that the covid-19 excuse could help prevent a seasonal surge in exasperation and seething rage associated with the Thanksgiving holiday.
“Covid-19 could get you off the hook this year,” Fauci said. “Consider this a doctor’s note from me.”
By using the pandemic as justification for skipping Thanksgiving, Americans can spare the feelings of relatives they despise, the esteemed virologist said.
“Tell your aunt from West Virginia that you’ll miss her, but you’ll look forward to reading her QAnon theories on Facebook,” he advised.
For his part, Fauci said that he intends to employ covid-19 as an excuse to exempt himself from other unpleasant activities. “I plan to use it to avoid seeing Rand Paul,” he said.
Short article, no more at link: 
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/fauci-urges-americans-to-use-covid-as-excuse-to-skip-thanksgiving-with-horrible-relatives
= new reply since forum marked as read
That's how he's manages to persevere despite all the crap he's gotten from Rand Paul and the anti-vaxxers.
Thx for sharing!
I do not think I could spend a day with anyone who actually supports Trump. Yikes! Good luck... 
Restrict the discussions to food. 
And we have "Americanized" all kinds of food from different cultures, including the attempts at replicating what was supposedly eaten at the First Thanksgiving. And we see it every day, canned Chow Mein, frozen pizza, boxed Mexican food kits, and even frozen varieties of the pierogies that my Polish grandmother used to make - which aren't even close. 
And my aunt learned to make them from her Russian mother-in-law and then taught her 3 kids. I was told that the Russian variety traditionally contains potatoes while the Polish variety is usually sauerkraut. I can remember my grandmother making them, rinsing and draining the sauerkraut (and we kids liked them!). They were boiled, then fried in butter with bits of salt pork. She also made a kind of sweet bread that contained what she called "pot cheese," but that wasn't available here, either, so she used collage cheese which she drained overnight using cheese cloth. I wish I'd been able to learn how to cook from her, she made everything from scratch and never used any recipes. *sigh*
And of course we like Dr. Fauci...
