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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsTexas Bans Consensual Sex
AUSTIN, TXJoined by Republicans from the state legislature in a highly publicized ceremony, Texas governor Greg Abbott signed a law Thursday banning consensual sex.
Im proud to sign this bill into law today making all consensual sexual acts punishable by a minimum of 10 years in prison, said Abbott, who was applauded by religious and other right-wing interest groups for standing up for traditional family values.
Consensual sex has always been immoral, and now its finally illegal, too. Enthusiastic, continuous, specific, freely given, and clearly communicated sexual consent will not be tolerated in Texas. Any person who sets up two friends on a date who then go on to have a consensual sexual relationship will also be held responsible and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.
At press time, the U.S. Supreme Court had issued a ruling declining to block the new law.
https://www.theonion.com/texas-bans-consensual-sex-1848631845
Flaleftist
(3,473 posts)And not clicked on the link wondering what fucking ridiculous shit Republicas are doing now.
smirkymonkey
(63,221 posts)Usually, I could tell right away, but I honestly wasn't sure this time. Which is really scary.
brush
(53,467 posts)Last edited Sun Mar 13, 2022, 05:50 AM - Edit history (1)
Abbott was running neck and neck with DeSantns in my mind as the craziest governor but now he's pulled decisively ahead.
What are they smoking? I kept reading for the hook..like the new law was banning consensual sex between LGBTQ people, or transexual people as that's a big thing now in winger Texas, or maybe between progressives or Blaci people...but no, it's banning consensual sex between everyone?
What did I miss? A married couple can't consent to sex? What, they just have to shut up and do it, or not do it because it's against the law?
What a crazy state to live in.
Beto better grap this and run with it 24/7 in his campaign against Abbott as this is cray-cray.
elias7
(3,976 posts)Life is imitating satire so closely now (the author of the ectopic pregnancy bill in MO doesnt even know what ectopic means)
brush
(53,467 posts)in the post. It seems deceptive tuck away way down there.
DemocraticPatriot
(4,170 posts)not the Onion. It is rather a sad commentary on the crazy state of the nation, when one believes satire to be truthful.
However, recent observation of our resident fascists shows that there is no depth to which they are incapable of sinking.
Witness "Florida Freedom", which means, taking away the rights to free speech over a broad spectrum with a new law which is very clearly unconstitutional.
11 Bravo
(23,922 posts)AllaN01Bear
(17,355 posts)and yet again the scoutus has shown its colors .
OAITW r.2.0
(23,812 posts)monthly pregnancy checks mandatory? How can you protect a blastocyst, if you don't know it exists?
These newly elected Republican legislator's sure like legislating laws that they like. Will the voters keep voting them back into office?
Sugarcoated
(7,707 posts)Deuxcents
(15,776 posts)Always check the sources ✔️ Satire is fun 🤩
Response to Deuxcents (Reply #6)
jfz9580m This message was self-deleted by its author.
Karma13612
(4,527 posts)Check any link in the body of the OP first to see if its from the onion.
And I agree that a snark tag in the title would be MUCH appreciated.
johnp3907
(3,723 posts)I usually guess right!
krispos42
(49,445 posts)Then as I read it, I was waiting for it to be a legit story about a ban between unmarried people having sex.
*shrug* It's Texas. They mandate teaching theocracy-approved alternatives to science, history, and general reality; crush teacher's unions: and then wonder why they have a teacher shortage.
ShazzieB
(15,952 posts)Texans wonder why they have a teacher shortage, while their lawmakers ignore all the reasons you mentioned, as well as the lousy teachers' salaries in that state.
As this article shows, Texas teachers have many reasons for wanting to hit the road:
*snip*
When the teachers were asked what would make them stay in public education, 45% said they want pay incentives (retention bonus, pay raise), 35% said they want changes to workload (fewer responsibilities) and 8% said they want workplace safety improvements.
https://www.khou.com/article/news/education/texas-aft-survey-shows-66-percent-of-teachers-consider-quitting/285-d898251b-c3c8-4780-a386-8b505c64805e
Imagine those wacky Repugs down there being willing to actually spend money to fix those problems. (I know, I can't, either.)
krispos42
(49,445 posts)That seems to be the plan
SergeStorms
(18,882 posts)The asshole in the Governor's mansion is crazy enough to do something like this, but just to be sure........and sure enough, The Onion.
I have to learn to trust my instincts better.
Deuxcents
(15,776 posts)Aristus
(66,080 posts)Deuxcents
(15,776 posts)betsuni
(25,122 posts)walkingman
(7,507 posts)jeffreyi
(1,934 posts)You can sue them! After turning them in to the authorities, of course.
IngridsLittleAngel
(1,962 posts)Texas: Where Reality Is Even Darker Than Your Jokes
JohnnyRingo
(18,581 posts)...hate sex.
At least that's what his wife and every other woman he's been with tells him.
Response to Zorro (Original post)
YoshidaYui This message was self-deleted by its author.
Grokenstein
(5,707 posts)YoshidaYui
(41,759 posts)I WAS pissed about this till i realized it was a joke,,,not much of a joke if you are gay or lesbian.
TlalocW
(15,358 posts)Missouri passed a bill about sex that was so convoluted with "fancy words" form lawmakers trying to show off that professional linguists were brought in to decipher the bill, and they concluded it outlawed sex.
TlalocW
czarjak
(11,191 posts)keithbvadu2
(36,360 posts)Wonder how Abbot is making progress on eliminating rape in Texas.
Emile
(21,888 posts)you almost never know.
DemocraticPatriot
(4,170 posts)the position of General Santa Anna...
As it turns out, he may have fought to enforce 'freedom', since the Mexican government had outlawed slavery-- and the rebels in Texas were firmly in favor of fighting for the 'freedom' to have black slaves...
Yes, Santa Anna was no flower, but on the one issue which seems to have been the primary grievance of Texicans who rebelled against the Mexican government, Santa Anna was right, and the Texicans were wrong. The defenders of the Alamo may have accomplished a tremendous feat of arms against hopeless, overwhelming odds-- (and strictly as a military feat of arms, without examining the cause, their defense was admirable, although ultimately unsuccessful), their motivations were depraved. Their 'line in the sand' was the line between supporting black slavery, and freedom for all people in Texas-- and they ended on the wrong side of it.
Today, the powers-that-be in Texas continue to line up on the wrong side of the line-- against freedom.
rownesheck
(2,343 posts)I have lived in Texas my whole life and I assure you, we were never taught this in school. We were taught that Texans wanted independence from Mexico and that was it. I never knew the real reason for it. It makes me sick thinking about it. Sam Houston and all those Alamo fuckwads are celebrated as heroes, and that's what we were taught.
The US should have told Texas to go fuck itself rather than allow it to become a state. The country would have been better off.
Zorro
(15,691 posts)In it he asserted that the admission of Texas as a slave state was THE root cause of the Civil War.