Words hurt. The sticks and stones thing is bull.

[Srkdqltr]

Words hurt.

The sticks and stones thing is bull.

Laughing at someone elses problem is the sign of a sick mind.

If a person laughs at their own problems that is fine but when someone else makes fun it is cruel.

There is way to much cruel in the world..

[LastDemocratInSC]

1. You are correct.

Words can inspire and heal, no doubt about that, but words can also convey cruelty that causes deep harm.

[Blues Heron]

2. Does not justify a physical assault though

that what the old saying is getting at (and our laws)

[DinahMoeHum]

4. I'm sorry, but there are some times it IS justified.

There are some places you just. don't. go.

[Blues Heron]

5. I know - Ive heard that talking point since this happened - its wrong

Its a misdemeanor assault on live TV

[Lunabell]

15. Yep

I think "slap a nazi" or "slap a bully" should be a tik tok challenge, lol.

[USALiberal]

20. Bullshit!

[USALiberal]

25. Just. Don't. Punch. People.

[Mrhyde719]

43. The correct response should have been just to get up and walk out

And perhaps a couple of finger salutes

[uponit7771]

51. You've never been shot at

[BlackSkimmer]

68. Amazing people have restrained themselves through all the awards shows of the past then.

All the roasts, all the comedy shows.

Smith is an insecure, immature bully. He’d never have done that to a larger man. Wonder what he’d have done if a woman had made the joke?

[meadowlander]

71. Good luck with that line of argument in court.

[bucolic_frolic]

3. Got that right: "Laughing at someone elses problem is the sign of a sick mind." Sociopaths! /nt

[ripcord]

98. It is freak show level amusement nt

[WhiskeyGrinder]

6. I'm fine with someone standing up to protect a disabled Black woman.

[USALiberal]

23. Standing up to you means punching them in the face?

Standing up to you means punching them in the face?

[WhiskeyGrinder]

24. Sometimes, yes. Sometimes it means a slap.

[USALiberal]

26. And hopefully it mean to jail for the puncher.

[WhiskeyGrinder]

27. Lol

[USALiberal]

28. Bully growing up??

[WhiskeyGrinder]

32. Honestly, yep, a couple times. Bullied and was bullied, as were many kids.

[fishwax]

46. I am too. But he wasn't protecting her.

[oldsoftie]

50. Shes not disabled.

[BlackSkimmer]

69. Disabled?

I have alopecia.

It is not a disability.

[meadowlander]

72. Exactly.

"The ADA defines a person with a disability as a person who has a physical or mental impairment that substantially limits one or more major life activity."

Alopecia is a medical condition, not a disability.

[BlackSkimmer]

81. Exactly.

And Jada is not bald. She’s chosen to shave her head.

I’m not bald either; my doctor and hairdresser are the only people who even know.

[Javaman]

82. same here. hell, if it were considered a "disability" give me the benefits. Hell I'll just take the

handicap sticker for my car. Sweet parking spaces LOL

[BlackSkimmer]

84. Lol, I'll have to remember to ask my doc for one of those stickers next time lol.

She’ll probably crack up laughing.

[BlackSkimmer]

70. Jada Pickett can stand up for herself.

What if a woman made that joke? Would it be ok if he slapped a woman?

And what’s her race got to do with it? Last time I checked, Chris Rock is a black man.

[BannonsLiver]

89. Well there's one vote for violence equals love

Not at all surprising either.

[TNNurse]

7. I would rather he took him down with words.

I see posts about how Smith was acting for himself...I truly believe he was totally defending his wife. What Chris Rock said was tasteless, thoughtless and needed to be taken to task. Words would have been a better option.

I cannot however imagine how Will Smith's emotions were sitting in that room wondering about his possible part in the ceremony.
When I lost my hair to cancer (which was temporary), I did not go out in public without my head covered. It was a big step for her to do that and he was aware.

[AllyCat]

8. I didn't watch but what you just said summed things up for me.

Physical violence is almost never the answer, even when Rock was being a real arse.

[Emile]

9. Being compared to Demi Moore is not hurtful.

[LisaL]

10. Well, great.

Are we then allowed to smack people who say things that upset us?

[Wahyee]

35. +1

[heckles65]

11. " Being compared to Demi Moore is not hurtful."

I agree. The joke was rather mild.

[LiberatedUSA]

12. I bet the right would like this concept.

Attacking people for saying things they don’t like.

[dumbcat]

39. Exactly!

If some MAGAt gets really, really upset by us making some progressive point, it's justified for him to smack us? I think that thread would go in a different direction.

[Srkdqltr]

13. There have been times I would have liked to do what Will Smith did to hurtful people. I lack the

Physical strength to do it. This had to be done in the moment. Bullying is difficult to combat. Too many people enjoy others being bullied.

[ChazII]

14. Stick and stones

can break your bones but words can break a heart.

[Lunabell]

16. I'm on team Will and Jada.

It was the heat of the moment. Chris Rock learned the hard way that you shouldn't make fun of someone's medical condition. He didn't press charges. Let's move on.

[cemaphonic]

76. It wasn't the heat of the moment though.

Smith laughed at the joke, then walked up to the stage. It wasn't some reflexive reaction (which still would have been unjustified) - He had time to consider his actions.

[Srkdqltr]

17. I bet everyone who has been the butt of others "jokes" was cheering.

And folks who think making jokes about others is funny are all up in arms to justify.

[fishwax]

48. you'd lose that bet

Not everyone who has been the butt of others jokes thinks that violence is the answer

[kcr]

88. Wrong

[Act_of_Reparation]

18. Yes, they do.

And punching people ain't the proper or constructive response to hurtful words.

[Auggie]

19. IMO both of their behaviors were an abomination

The joke was inane, unoriginal, and thoughtless. The assault and battery was reckless and uncalled for bravado.

[ForgedCrank]

67. I think

you nailed it.
In addition, a real man would have done the deed off camera and never spoke of it again if his intentions were pure.
By what he did, he forced every person in attendance, and every person watching on TV to be a participant in an extremely uncomfortable situation.
I won't condone violence as a general rule, but if you insult my wife, that could happen depending on circumstances. I'm just not going to make a public spectacle out of it, especially after I just laughed at the joke myself. It shows signs of instability and a lack of impulse control. What we witnessed was your classic dick waving contest due to an injured ego.

[Auggie]

74. +1: "Classic dick waving"

[Evergreen Emerald]

21. Where do you draw the line?

What is acceptable? Slap? Kick? Slug? Shot?

When is the above acceptable? Anytime someone says something YOU believe is offensive? Is there criteria?

The idea that Will Smith's actions are acceptable is appalling.

[Wahyee]

36. +1

[Baltimike]

56. This. You have to give weight to those words...they don't HURT like a physical assault. nt

[meadowlander]

73. Even if someone physically hits you, you can't hit them back except in self defense.

So that's the line justifying hitting someone else.... not "he made me feel bad".

[PatrickforB]

22. Like the Chris Rock thing at the Oscars? Or Trumpy mocking the reporter with disabilities?

Yes. There is never a need to be cruel.

[SYFROYH]

29. I don't think Rock was making fun of problems.

[ECL213]

30. Jada Pinkett Smith may have alopecia...

But she is not bald because she has alopecia. She shaves her head. As a Southern black man, the only one of those two who deserved a slapping was Will Smith for his borderline racist impression of a Southern black man foe which he won the Oscar. Venus and Serena should slap the shit out of him.

[neohippie]

37. You know this how?

So you know this how She may have shaved her head because of hair loss, and just decided it was a better look than patches of lost hair, but you know her personally and she told you that was not the reason?

In this case, Chris Rock may have not known about her condition, and the joke was potentially hurtful. Was Smith's reaction appropriate, no, a better response may have been to bring up her condition and the pain that was potentially caused by the joke, but all of us have shown our worst sides at one point or another in our lives.

We are all capable of bad choices especially in a heat of a passionate moment. I think it is up to the two people involved to decide how to move on from this moment

And for all of those commenting about punching someone is never acceptable, who threw a punch? It just goes to show you how perceptions of events get very distorted.

[AlexSFCA]

31. one thing people seem to miss is that smith laughed at the "joke"

and only when he saw his wife was upset, he overcompensated for laughing and punched rock. The lesson here - don’t insult people with autoimmune desease or you will get punched in the face.

[Srkdqltr]

40. Good lesson to learn. Keep it in mind. People don't like being made fun of.

[Wingus Dingus]

33. Well that's not true. I would think Ukrainians, for example, would rather be offended

than bombed.

[Srkdqltr]

59. The Ukrainians are being bullied, they have every right to fight back.

Actually being invaded is the ultimate bullying.

[nowforever]

34. Trump needs at least 1000

At minimum there's Gen. Kelly, Nancy P., Ted Cruz, Pence and all the women and minorities in this country....that should do it.

[Traildogbob]

38. For the it was out of love crowd.

Women in abusive relationships and stay, getting the shit beat out of them, say the same thing. And are told to them by the abuser to justify beating them.
Believe me, very few would love to take that swing with a closed fist at trump, Jr and every damn one of the SC hearing howling Monkey crowd than me. But ya know what, there are laws in a civilized society. Sure seems like that is becoming no longer a thing here in MurKKKa, or world wide. We are heading into….Fucked.

[Wingus Dingus]

42. Yep. Lack of civility on display. If you don't like what someone says,

you deal with it in a proper way.

[Traildogbob]

61. With the hair trigger

Outrage out of control, ya add in unlimited semi auto killing machines, no training required and zero permits, we are heading into unlimited deaths. Self control may save your own life in the world we are in today. And after Rittenhouse, your death may be absolutely legal.
Chill pills people! Right wing media is pushing kill your neighbor. Heard a few blurps from the Georgia Klan jamboree, and not just trump, but his costar puppets like MTG had the words kill, death, lay down your life, ( not his) throughout their rants.
Bad days ahead.

[rictofen]

41. People better not watch Comedy Central roasts!

Whew boy.

[Srkdqltr]

44. Personally I don't find those things funny.

But... people know and can take part or not. It's the meanness that I don't understand.

[Jetheels]

45. Except this is Hollywood. Not real world living.

Everyone attending this event is well aware that there will be a comedian hosting the event and anyone could be a subject of their jokes. And they are well compensated for their work earning millions of dollars in a few months what the rest of us don’t earn in our entire lifetimes so they might have to suck up a thing or two here and there in their chosen public lifestyle. Pay me 30 million a year and call me whatever you want.

Whether or not the joke was in good taste or poor taste could be seen both ways. Some see it as an attack on someone’s looks / disease. Some see it as comparing her to Demi Moore. One is denigrating, one is elevating. These people all live a life of privilege most of us have no inkling about.

Most of us will be insulted many times in our lives. No one’s going to notice or give a fuvk.
These privileged few will go on talk shows and be paid even more money to go over how terrible their lives are and how awful they have been treated. And then go back to their 300 acre properties, jets, limos, Scientology classes, open marriages, Betty ford clinics, whatever, etc….
while the country is being reduced to a Jerry Springer episode.

[uponit7771]

49. +1, I am blown away at the tacit support of violence in the place of maturity in the face of words

[Jetheels]

60. Actors are the most coddled species on this planet. When they are on set there is an entire

cadre of workers at their disposal; makeup people, wardrobe, dressers, lighting…..they are the center of the universe, everyone is completely dependent on their every whim mood desire…. So they often have the maturity of baby.
When have any of us had someone putting out clothes on, ironing our clothes, putting on our make up, doing our lighting. These people do not live in the real world.

Maybe because they’re “stars” people accept their behavior. Idk. But good point, maturity is very lacking.

[uponit7771]

62. +1, and there were people hugging his ass and shit afterwards. Commit an act of violence that

... could easily escalate to other bullshit and get hugged ?!

Naw, hell now

[Jetheels]

64. Oh yea the Vanity Fair party.

I felt more embarrassed for Will Smith than he felt about himself, tbh.

[uponit7771]

47. Starting violence is ***NOT*** the mature way to handle words that hurt

[LizBeth]

52. We know this to be true in so many ways. Until it is a joke we want to laugh at or a

sexist slur we want to use.

[Duncan Grant]

53. Contextualizing violence isn't helpful. It's wrong.

Nothing I saw of Will Smith’s behavior can be excused or explained. There’s no “under the circumstances, I understand why” argument to be made.

Will Smith trespassed, intimated, slapped, assaulted and screamed at a comedian in front of untold millions. In my mind, that’s the real issue, not words or “comedy”. The sick minds thing? That was Will Smith believing he had the right to beat down a comedian at the Academy Awards.

I understand you found the words cruel. That is difficult. I simply find the physical violence and its subsequent “let’s pretend it didn’t happen” response to be appalling and unacceptable. Some corrective action needs to be taken.

[Goodheart]

54. No excuse for physical violence in response to words.

[58Sunliner]

55. I find it amazing that people don't consider the implications of a woman being humiliated in public.

Please don't tell me CR did not know about her condition. The joke was not vetted, apparently, or it would have been out. I wish WS would have taken the option to publicly inform the public how ugly his comment was and that women's looks should not be subject to ridicule. Women face a constant barrage of judgment from men based on their looks. That she has a medical condition that he was ridiculing makes it that much worse and shows a nasty character. The comment from CR creates the type of environment in which women are harassed and abused. I'd like to see the acknowledgment that being a comic does not give you license to play into the misogyny.

[treestar]

86. How to be sure it was ridiculing?

I doubt CR wants to ridicule anyone specific - why would he do that on purpose? How was he making fun of the condition, especially if he did not know about it? Making fun of the hairstyle, which some women do - I have seen women who are not ill choose that hairstyle of just shaving, then wearing a lot of make up and big earrings. It's not unheard of.

[58Sunliner]

94. Straw men don't count. Please don't try to tell me he did not know.

I won't be responding.

[treestar]

96. How would you know any better than I what he knows?

I am as good at reading his mind as you can be.

[Hieronymus Phact]

57. One of my favorite quotes from Eleanor Roosevelt:

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."

[treestar]

87. People need to remember this one more

there's so much out there about not hurting people's feelings - and it is possible to do it unintentionally and it does seem to be getting extreme. ER was right. You don't have to worry about what people say - they don't know all the facts. And why let those people who are trying to put you down succeed?

[nowforever]

58. Chris Rock needed that

His remark was made at another human being's expense. It drew all the focus to her and for what purpose so it could generate a laugh. That is the lowest form of humor and encourages that behavior. It is demeaning and he received the appropriate response. If Will Smith had wanted to he could have leveled Chris, he chose to give him a physical reprimand that then made Chris the focus and the object of ridicule. Every bully needs that lesson because verbal correction does not reach their brain. Consequences need to be immediate and it was. Guarantee Chris Rock will think before he derives his humor at the expense of another. I just wish when Trump was a youngster he was taught that lesson but unfortunately his father was a practitioner.

[Duncan Grant]

63. You're advocating for physical violence. Not a good look.

Nothing Will Smith did was chivalrous or excusable under any circumstances. It was a public assault. Smith should have been detained and arrested, just as any member of the public would have been. The entire episode is a travesty from start to finish.

I’m stunned anyone would be a cheerleader for physical violence here at DU.

[Jedi Guy]

65. You shouldn't be stunned.

There have been plenty of people here on DU advocating and/or cheering on violence on a number of occasions. This is just the most recent example. As long as the target of the violence is an "acceptable" person/group, then violence is fine and dandy to these DUers.

These are no doubt the same folks who will call for people to be jailed for making remarks they don't like, such as the people here who consistently call for "hate speech" to be criminalized. The only difference is that they're advocating force/violence perpetrated by the state in the latter instance.

[Duncan Grant]

83. Saw my pride flag, eh?

I don’t agree with your framing that legislating hate speech is equivalent to state sanctioned violence/assault on an individual. Enough said, AFAIC.

[Jedi Guy]

85. I didn't see your pride flag since I was posting from my phone.

Legislating hate speech is 100% equivalent because force is being employed in response to speech; the only difference is the actor employing the force. In fact, it's arguably worse. In this instance, Smith responded to Rock's speech with a slap. It stung for a moment, no doubt, but then it was over. If the government arrests someone and throws them in prison because they engaged in speech that's proscribed under "hate speech" laws, that's far more serious than a momentary sting on the cheek and has a far greater impact on their life.

[58Sunliner]

95. Your remark sounds remarkably like a right-wing talking point.

"These are no doubt the same folks who will call for people to be jailed for making remarks they don't like, such as the people here who consistently call for "hate speech" to be criminalized."

[Jedi Guy]

97. Calling for people to be jailed for speech one dislikes happens quite frequently here on DU.

It's 100% an authoritarian response. Suggesting that someone be jailed or otherwise punished by the state for engaging in "hate speech" runs directly counter to the First Amendment, as it protects even the most abhorrent speech as long as it doesn't cross very well-defined lines. It's behavior that the right also engages in. The only difference is the nature of the speech in question.

[live love laugh]

80. Violence is unjustified here.

While Rock’s remarks were unfortunate they were not violent.

There were so many other options available. Smith could’ve used the pulpit to respond or confronted Rock privately.

What Smith did was unacceptable.

[BannonsLiver]

90. What a ridiculous, uninformed point of view.

Violence = love in your book.

[Catherine Vincent]

66. Comedians do it all the time

And get rich by it. Making jokes is fine but don't make it personal.

[gulliver]

75. If Chris Rock didn't know about the alopecia, would that make a difference?

I find it very hard to believe that Chris Rock would deliberately make fun of someone suffering from a disease, mocking a symptom of the disease. That just doesn't fit with my experience of Chris Rock.

Both Will Smith and his wife should have assumed Rock didn't know. Indeed, if Rock didn't know that the situation was something besides Pinkett Smith sporting a daring look, then he might in fact have been wanting to give her a gentle "roast" and "name check" good publicity.

If Smith knew 100% that Rock was deliberately making fun of his wife's medical condition, he could have confronted him verbally. Smith's later speech shows that he has the ability to use words.

But if Smith didn't know 100% that Rock was deliberately being cruel (and that is what I suspect), then what Smith did was, unfortunately, completely insane and rotten. Denzel Washington's warning may have come too late.

[live love laugh]

78. I agree. I didn't know. I thought it was a choice.

[treestar]

92. Yes, motive

Why would CR deliberately insult her at that moment in that place? There would have to be a history of bad blood between them, bad enough for CR to do that.

[live love laugh]

77. Trump proved that.

[SYFROYH]

79. Normally I would say yes, but these folksare professionals attending an event where the comedians...

Last edited Mon Mar 28, 2022, 04:08 PM - Edit history (1)

...skewer the attendees. This is normal at the Oscars and Golden Globes

[BGBD]

91. Everybody has a point where they will react

And if you think they don't then they are lying to themselves.

[cksmithy]

93. I don't know if anyone

has said something similar to this, apologies if they have, I don't want to be repetitive/redundant. I wish a person had walked onto the stage and got in tfg drump's face with a raised hand and maybe slapped or hit him, when he mocked the handicapped reporter by making fun of the reporters movements. I don't see what Chris Rock said as being different from what trump said. Chris Rock was making fun of someone with a medical condition that is totally not their fault. Maybe Chris will research his targets before he makes jokes. It was like making a ms joke, not ever funny. My sister had to endure people laughing at how she walked while she was still working. They knew about her condition, but they still mocked her.