The lack of civility in this country has risen to the level of international embarrassment

[mnhtnbb]

broadcast around the world on live television at the Oscars last night.

It's been going on for years now. 'Karens' rudely confronting people of color, or gay, or speaking a language other than English. Racists or misogynists or elder abusers hitting people on the street, pushing people off subway platforms into oncoming trains. MAGATs hurling insults at people for being in favor of various civil rights. Stalking and killing physicians who provide abortions.

Last night was a symptom of the disease that has infected our society. The joke Chris Rock told last night at Jada Pinkett Smith's expense would have been ok if she had told it on herself. If she'd said, 'don't I look like I could play the next GI Jane?', it would have been funny. But that isn't what happened. Instead, Rock insulted her, and instead of Will Smith inviting Chris Rock to take it outside or meet him at dawn with pistols as he would have in days gone by, he just immediately acted on his anger.

What happened last night was a tragedy and represented a true fall from grace. On a night when Will Smith was recognized by his peers for his performance in a film as being the best from any leading actor in any other film all year, he chose to let his anger destroy the beauty of that moment. That is a true tragedy.

It's a symptom of the breakdown of our society. We have lost our ability to react reasonably to any kind of slight or to tolerate people with whom we disagree. Frankly, I don't see how we are going to come back from this and that represents a national tragedy.

[CurtEastPoint]

1. a friend and I were JUST discussing this. When did it start? With the appearance of that Orange

Fucker. He opened the floodgates to rudeness and hatred.

[Rebl2]

40. Yes

[BlackSkimmer]

2. What's really sad is how it overshadowed the true class and graciousness shown by Lady Gaga

to Liza Minnelli. Any other time, that would have been the story.

But the actions of this pathetic, wee, insecure man managed to overshadow all the people who should have been the real news.

[mnhtnbb]

6. Yes. I had no idea that Liza Minnelli had become so frail.

[BlackSkimmer]

11. I didn't either. I was very touched by how Lady Gaga interacted with her.

What a wonderful woman she must be. And Liza is a true legend.

What a contrast to the sad and childish behavior of earlier in the evening.

[mnhtnbb]

12. Did you see the Special that Lady Gaga did with Tony Bennett?

They were fabulous together.

Cabaret is one of my favorite films. I went to see Liza Minnelli in concert at the Universal Amphitheatre in the '80's when I was living in L.A. What a show she put on. Fabulous.

[BlackSkimmer]

13. No, i have to admit I didn't even know about it.

Wow, how lucky you are to have seen Liza in concert!

[mnhtnbb]

14. There's a link for the Lady Gaga/Tony Bennett special

https://www.cbs.com/shows/one-last-time-an-evening-with-tony-bennett-and-lady-gaga/

[BlackSkimmer]

15. Thank you!

[moonscape]

42. Never forget when Gwen Verdon

was out sick and Liza Minelli stood in for her in Chicago in 1975 when I was living in Manhattan and got to see her. Fantastic, memorable performance!

[1WorldHope]

36. Pathetic, wee and insecure...

Unfair. It may have been pathetic moment in Will Smith's life, but it should not define him as a human. You don't know him.

[BlackSkimmer]

38. I have been a fan of his for years.

He showed who he is last night.

I’m older than Will Smith and somehow have managed to live all this time without feeling the need to sucker punch/slap anyone. Ever.

[happy feet]

46. I agree

I read this is the 2nd time Chris made a joke of Jada's bald hair coupled with the fact of thewir 'strange' marriage which has made them the joke/gossip of Hollywood for a long time. I think lots was going on with Will inside and he lost it after seeing look on Jada's face.

Before others jump on me. IN NO WAY AM I CONDONING WILL SLAPPING CHRIS. Au contraire, WILL WAS WRONG TO SLAP CHRIS and it took away from the recognition of others the rest of the night.

Just showing some empathy towards Will who is known as a 'good' egg in general. Good people do 'bad' things sometimes and bad people do 'good' things sometimes. It's unfair to judge one's overall character from a single event vs. totality.

My respect for Chris went up last night (I also like Chris Rock) in the way he handled it and continued on with his responsibilities rather than stooping to the low of Will's actions.

[old as dirt]

3. Symptom of the disease that infected our society from top to bottom. Here's the bottom.

[Traildogbob]

25. That was worthy

Of a full swing slap to that arrogant mug. God I hate that ass deep in my bones, in every individual cell of my marrow. He is a pure DUNK! A combo of a Dick and a “C” word without using that disgusting word. A pure fucking “DUNK”!

[heckles65]

4. Sorry, I thought Rock's joke

was pretty mild. Be linked Demi Moore at the height of her career? Is that really so bad?

[mnhtnbb]

7. Being bald is not Ms Smith's choice

and presumably she's not ready to laugh at her situation. So unless she makes the joke about herself, it is bad. Try substituting some other unwanted disfigurement or disability and see how it plays.

[questionseverything]

34. She has talked about her hair loss on many occasions

Do you think if she had worn a wig, she would of been the only one in the room?

She created a pod cast to talk about their open marriage so I don’t think she is as delicate as folks are portraying her to be.

[Rebl2]

43. Yes she seems

to be a strong woman. Doesn’t give someone the right to joke about her alopecia in front of millions of people. Just like tfg had no right to make fun of a reporter’s disability.

[ecstatic]

51. A lot of people didn't know she had alopecia, and even many who did

had no idea what alopecia means. Not everyone is caught up in celebrity news/gossip.

[pinkstarburst]

52. Women are not typically bald

Just like you would not expect to see a child who is bald.

Anyone who is not howl at the moon stupid understands that when you encounter a bald woman or child, there is usually a reason for it, and it is not a happy reason.

Cancer. Alopecia.

So you don't crack a joke.

Just like you don't see someone in a wheelchair and say are you just sitting there for fun?

Unless you're just really stupid.

Who knows. Maybe Chris Rock is just that dense.

But I do not write someone a pass for not having been expressly told about a medical condition when anyone should have been able to infer that sort of thing because women and children are not usually bald.

[ecstatic]

53. My sister just shaved her hair off

It's fairly common in my community. And because soooo many wigs are stylish and easily available (and are regularly worn by both women with no hair and women with hair down to their butt), there's almost no link between diseases and wearing no hair/very little hair. Just offering a different perspective, I know things are different in other communities or parts of the country.

[ripcord]

8. Humor has sunk to the point of mocking appearances and medical conditions

If things keep going like this maybe we can bring back freak shows to really entertain the masses, they can laugh at all kinds of conditions and deformities.

[mnhtnbb]

9. Is it a coincidence that the remake of Nightmare Alley was up for several awards last night?

[tinrobot]

16. Freak shows? Like "My 600 lb Life"? "Hoarders"?

It's been happening for a long time. Nothing new here.

[Boomerproud]

28. They still get away with calling it The Learning Channel.

[Traildogbob]

27. As trump does

That shows how classless it is. Both men crossed a line.

[Metro135]

37. If she had cancer

would he make a chemotherapy joke?

Ms. Smith's condition must have caused her a good deal of stress and most likely continues to do so. That said, her husband's behavior was inexcusable, a textbook example of a populace that must act out and cannot control its emotions. Will Smith should have taken Rock aside after the Oscars and, to make his anger known, should have relayed it to the media in no uncertain terms. What he did was show anyone watching that violence was acceptable as a way to express your feelings. It is not.

[Irish_Dem]

5. A friend and I were just talking about how rude and mean people have become.

[Chainfire]

17. Lack of civility did not start with Trump

It has been carefully nurtured since at least the beginning of Rush Limbaugh. I remember his hate filled rants from the mid 90s. Trump was just the crowning achievement, the voice of power and authority that normalized idiocy and meanness. At least, I hope that he was the crowning achievement. Who knows? We may come to a time where we look back at Trump with longing...

I look around our country today and hope that it is me that has gone mad and that the country is still rational, practical and run by honest, hardworking national servants who have our best interests at heart. Maybe DU is a figment of my demented imagination...it is either that or the rest of you are somewhat crazy too! Perhaps the right has been right all along.

You lock the lock and throw away the key,
There's someone in my head but its not me.

[Jetheels]

22. Trump normalized it, weaponized it, brought it to a national level.

For everyone to see. And showed that he could get away with it. With anything.
He brought the bottom to the top.

[Tumbulu]

54. You expressed my perceptions of it all perfectly

I have a farm and I just never want to leave it. I fear that things will get worse and hope with every cell in my being that I am wrong.

And it started with Limbaugh. And just got amped up by him and his buds over the decades.

[FakeNoose]

55. The rude bullying of Newt Gingrich actually predates Limbaugh by almost 10 years

In my mind, it started with him. However the obvious point is that all the rude bullies have been Repukes.
Every single one.

[IbogaProject]

18. She was wearing a Green Dress, along with the very short hair.

She was wearing a green ball gown that went all the way up to her neck like a uniform would, and he may have had a slot in his prepared notes to find one outfit or such to make an on the spot joke. It's likely Chris hadn't done his research and didn't know the health reason for her short hair. I believe it was an off the cuff add-lib. I am biased as I like Chris's work much better.

[cab67]

32. Hate to say it, but as a fellow Chris Rock fan -

There’s zero chance he didn’t know the back story.

I like his work, too, but that was a serious lapse in judgment. He mocked someone for her medical condition. He should acknowledge this.

I’m not, in any way, condoning Will Smith’s actions. I think they should both be ashamed of themselves.

[IbogaProject]

57. I have a theory

I have a theory that Mr Smith had said to Chris that if he ever mocked his wife he'd slap him and they had a back and forth. Therefore when he went up Chris knew he'd get slapped and didn't avoid it. Nothing else really explains the situation as well.

[Snackshack]

19. Agreed

Smith was way out of line and should be held accountable. What we saw last night is the same thing we saw during the 2016 campaign rallies where a candidate was openly telling attendees to assault others and that he would pay for the lawyer fee.

[Kaleva]

20. Lynching blacks and massacring Native Americans was pretty bad.

But apparently not as bad as one man slapping another on tv.

[mnhtnbb]

29. I'm in the middle of reading The 1619 Project

and was thinking about film in relationship to our origin story yesterday. TCM showed Gone With the Wind at 4 pm Eastern, and it was still playing as all the celebrities were arriving on the Red Carpet. Hattie McDaniel was the first Black person to win an Academy Award for her role as Mammy in GWTW. Lupita Nyong'o was sitting right behind the Smiths. She won an award for her role in 12 Years a Slave several years ago, which told quite a different story about slavery than the nostalgic, romanticized version of GWTW.

And then last night, before Will Smith wins for his role as the father of Venus and Serena Williams, he goes and changes the focus of the entire evening by assaulting another performer who makes an ill conceived joke about his wife.

Look at the distance the film industry has traveled from 1939 to 2021, from Gone With the Wind to King Richard. That should have been the focus last night, and instead it was lost because of the equivalent of a saloon fight, without the guns.

[Jack-o-Lantern]

21. Some people are now saying the Oscar punch was all part of the show,

that the punch was fake and never landed.Such buffoonery.

Anyway, who really cares.

[Chakaconcarne]

30. Yep, I think it was fake as well......

There was a lot of weight behind that slap.... No watering of the eyes, no discoloration in the cheek... recovery from Rock was immediate. Rock didn't act surprised.... Smith smirked as he turned around and had the look of someone who wasn't pissed... I think it was scripted, but Smith ad-libbed the cursing part and that is what drew silence and that is what the Academy is trying to address..... how they handle the messaging and aftermath.

Smith's wife did not look super pissed... she rolled her eyes.... Will Smith was initially laughing.... Rock didn't press charges....

I think it all adds up to a staged event.

[sop]

39. I agree, it was a put-up job.

[dwayneb]

56. Ditto - looked staged to me

And then Smith's comments afterwards, tying his action to protect of his wife to the theme of King Richard.
Smells like a con job to me. We'll see.

[BannonsLiver]

41. They're saying that because they're obtuse and in many cases, just plain dumb.

[blue sky at night]

23. Oh gee a comedian made a joke...

that's why they have them on the show. We had a saying when I was growing up...Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke! What a snowflake, I used to admire Will but after last night see above! Will just fucked himself royal and for once I couldn't care less.

[BGBD]

24. A joke about his wife's appearance and health

It's what Ted Cruz should have done to Donald Trump.

[cab67]

33. He made a joke in very bad taste.

He mocked a woman for a medical condition that affects her appearance. It wasn’t funny, and Rock should have walked it back the instant he saw the look on Jada Pinkett Smith’s face.

[Grumpy Old Guy]

26. It started with the concept of "political correctness."

The concept of "political correctness" is something the right came up with as a means to excuse their bad behavior. According to them, treating people with respect was "politically correct," and something to be ridiculed.

[lunatica]

31. Someone needlessly hurt his wife

who perhaps is having a difficult time going through her disease. He simply saw it as cruel and hurtful to her, and instinctively reacted to defend and protect her. She obviously didn’t like the joke. My view is that it’s best not to laugh at people’s maladies because it’s an extremely cruel thing to do in most circumstances.

[Mr. Evil]

35. The way I see it is,

be it that the joke may have been in poor taste (that's for each individual to decide), I'm afraid that all Will Smith accomplished is now anyone that is offended by a joke will physically attack the comedian in question.

He could've easily waited until after the bit or during the next commercial break and said, " Man, that wasn't really cool." I'm sure Chris Rock would've immediately apologized to him and Jada.

[DET]

44. Much Ado About Nothing

That joke would have gone completely unnoticed if Will Smith had kept his cool. Personally, I had no idea that Smith’s wife had alopecia, and I’d never even heard of GI Jane. I suspect that most of the audience outside that room were equally uninformed.

Whatever we think of Chris Rock’s joke, Will’s behavior was completely uncalled for and is symptomatic of the increasing coarsening of our culture. It’s also reflective of the ‘it’s all about me’ mindset personified by Trump. It’s especially unfortunate that it detracted from the incredibly touching interchange between the ever gracious lady Gaga and a schockingly frail Liza Minnelli.

[KentuckyWoman]

45. Nearly every day my local news reports on a fight/shooting between strangers in public

A few days ago we had one over who was next in line at the dollar store. 2 women decided to duke it out.

Honestly I can't tell if things are actually any worse or if the rude is just getting more visibility . I grew up in a day when adults could take it out on their children and spouses and most get away with it. It seemed like everyone had a bully to contend with but it was mostly under the radar. Society changing and social media have changed the dynamic.

From childhood I distinctly remember 2 ladies rolling about the shoe store snatching at each other's hair. My mother grabbed us and got us out of there. I had to put my shoes back on outside. There was certainly a lot of whispering about it but never on the news.

[Evolve Dammit]

47. It's here to stay. We are in a Drumpf stoked civil war; started with Raygun and 40 years of Rushbo.

[LuckyCharms]

48. Excellent post. n/t

[pinkstarburst]

49. You only got it half right

The joke Chris Rock told last night at Jada Pinkett Smith's expense would have been ok if she had told it on herself. If she'd said, 'don't I look like I could play the next GI Jane?', it would have been funny.

Chris Rock told a nasty, misogynistic joke that demeaned Jada Pinkett Smith because of her medical condition.

It wasn't funny. Making fun of people with medical conditions, whether it's cancer, or alopecia, or Trump mocking a reporter with physical disabilities on TV isn't funny. It's also a symptom of the breakdown of society, as you put it.

The joke itself was as much a problem as Will Smith's reaction to the joke.

Neither part of what happened was okay. One does not excuse the other.

Both men behaved badly.

[Tree Lady]

50. It bothers me also that Will just blew what he did off

and happily danced the night away. The tears showed he knew he did something wrong but the way he blew it off was like he was saying to the whole world oops sorry my bad its okay to hit someone in front of the whole world on live tv.

It wasn't' like a simple mistake where its okay to say I'm sorry. If Chris had chose to press charges he would have been criminally liable for what he did.

I personally think he snapped in fear of losing his wife when he saw how the joke affected her and was afraid she would say, you just let men talk about me like that!!

I have seen men rage and minutes later act as if they never have done a thing. It's very worrisome.