Post-Roe Job Ads of the Future

[ck4829]

Cashier: Minimum wage, zero benefits, PhD required.
Pro-life conservative comment: About as sad as being a bartender, they have no value, let's move on...

Debt Collector: Hunt down debtors who violate the sanctity of profits with lethal force.
Pro-life conservative comment: Sounds fun, get to carry your own guns!

Human Sacrifice: Train and study for years and then throw your body into the abyss to ensure the Dow's profits for another day.
Pro-life conservative comment: Every life is sacred, but so are profit margins!

Russian Shield: Russia needs bodies around its tanks as it liberates more and more of the world from tyrannical liberal concepts such as individual rights and presumption of innocence. Finland is expected to fall at the end of the year, you can be a part of that!
Pro-life conservative comment: Wow, they must really love the leader as he got 100% of the vote!

Servant of Billionaires: Billionaires are not supposed to touch the ground, someone must put their backs between their feet and the dirt to keep them in a job-creating mood! Billionaires will also need servants of the stool in their most private moments! Make 3 peanuts instead of 2.
Pro-life conservative comment: Hey, they earned that inheritance!