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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsThe First Social-Media Babies Are Growing Up--And They're Horrified
How would you feel if millions of people watched your childhood tantrums?https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2023/05/parents-posting-kids-online-tiktok-social-media/674137/
https://archive.is/eJuaq
My baby pictures and videos are the standard compendium of embarrassment. I was photographed waddling in nothing but a diaper, filmed smearing food all over my face instead of eating it. But Im old enough that the kompromat is safe in the confines of physical photo albums and VHS tapes in my parents attic. Even my earliest digital activityposting emotional MySpace photo captions and homemade music videostook place in the new and unsophisticated internet of the early 2000s, and has, blissfully, been lost to time. I feel relief whenever Im reminded of those vanished artifacts, and even more so when I see pictures and videos of children on the internet today, who wont be so lucky.
In December, I watched a TikTok of two young sisters named Olivia and Millie opening Christmas presents. When the large boxes in front of them turned out to contain two suitcases, Millie, who appeared to be about 4 years old, burst into tears. (Luggage, unsurprisingly, was not what she wanted from Santa.) Her parents scrambled to explain that the real presentstickets to a four-day Disney cruisewere actually inside the suitcases, but Millie was too far gone. She couldnt stop screaming and crying. Nine million strangers watched her breakdown, and thousands of them commented on it. This is a great ad for birth control, one wrote. (The TikTok has since been deleted.)
Two decades ago, this tantrum would have been just another bit of family lore, or at worst, a home video trotted out for relatives every Christmas Eve. But now, thoughtless choices made years agoa keg stand photographed, a grocery-store argument tapedcan define our digital footprints, and a generation of parents like Millies are knowingly burdening their children with an even bigger online dossier. The children of the Facebook erawhich truly began in 2006, when the platform opened to everyoneare growing up, preparing to enter the workforce, and facing the consequences of their parents social-media use. Many are filling the shoes of a digital persona thats already been created, and that they have no power to erase.
Caymi Barrett, now 24, grew up with a mom who posted Barretts personal momentsbath photos, her MRSA diagnosis, the fact that she was adopted, the time a drunk driver hit the car she was riding inpublicly on Facebook. (Barretts mother did not respond to requests for comment.) The distress this caused eventually motivated Barrett to become a vocal advocate for childrens internet privacy, including testifying in front of the Washington State House earlier this year. But before that, when Barrett was a teen and had just signed up for her first Twitter account, she followed her moms example, complaining about her siblings and talking candidly about her medical issues.
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honest.abe
(8,556 posts)There are so many parents publicly exposing their kids on Youtube and other social media. It cant be good in the long term. I will never do that to my kid no matter how much money I can make doing it. It almost feels like pimping them.
Sympthsical
(8,936 posts)I understand something like Facebook, where you're sharing with friends and family. I love seeing my friends' kids, etc. But the parents pushing their children on the general public on YouTube and TikTok are another breed. It is always about the parents, their craving for attention, and - tantalizing - the potential their darlings will bring in a bit of cash.
I love ASMR. So relaxing. And sometimes . . . like a 10 year old shows up in the algorithm. No. NONONONONONONONONONO. Stop stop stop. Get your fucking kid off the internet.
One thing I think a whole lot of parents need to hear in our digital age - they're children, not accessories. Oh, they're a reflection of you, all right. Just not in the way you think.
Solly Mack
(90,740 posts)roamer65
(36,739 posts)K&R
GhostHunter22
(95 posts)We have a five year old and a seven year old and I've posted many, many times with them as the subject - but, there are things that don't belong online of my children that are funny/embarrasing that I've shot and will be appreciated/laughed at by them when they're older - offline.
The article mentions that Caymi also posted freely about her life and medical issues on Twitter so I'm not entirely sure why she feels like it's OK for her to do it but not her Mother and feels the need for 'Children's Internet Privacy'.
Anyhow, her generation and those that follow (my kids) will be the most photographed and videoed in history thanks to the iPhone and other smart phone devices, and I think that's great. I would kill to see me taking my first steps or of hearing my tiny three year old voice (which we have of our kids).
But again, parents need to weigh what things should go online and what should not.