David Gergen-- "great men have affairs" ---Fuck you David!

[trumad]

Yeah Dave---fuck the wife and kids in the background who have to endure the public embarrassment because the errrrrr Great Men can't keep their dicks in their pants. Mr. Gergen---you win the Douchebag of the Week award!

<snip>
David Gergen — a friend of Gen. David Petraeus as well as the woman he reportedly had an extra-marital affair with — said on “Face The Nation” this morning that great men have affairs — and that those relationships can be very important to them in difficult times.
http://www.salon.com/2012/11/11/david_gergen_great_men_have_affairs/

On edit: This is what he said about the Clinton affair:

"We have our own set of village rules," says David Gergen, editor at large at U.S. News & World Report, who worked for both the Reagan and Clinton White House. "Sex did not violate those rules. The deep and searing violation took place when he not only lied to the country, but co-opted his friends and lied to them. That is one on which people choke.

"We all live together, we have a sense of community, there's a small-town quality here. We all understand we do certain things, we make certain compromises. But when you have gone over the line, you won't bring others into it. That is a cardinal rule of the village. You don't foul the nest."
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/politics/special/clinton/stories/quinn110298.htm

[CakeGrrl]

1. The Adultery Apologist.

That'll go over well.

[redqueen]

4. I wonder how many will silently agree...

too cowardly to admit they think this way.

[psychopomp]

94. Not I

Considering that this quote is taken out of context, I will take it on what it says: Significant, or powerful men have lovers outside of marriage. I think that is probably true: power is a terrific aphrodisiac for many women and men who stand far out ahead of the pack often have more than one woman at some point.

I will go so far as to say that humans are not, by nature, monogamous. If a couple can each go with having only one sex partner during the course of a lifetime--say, fifty years of marriage--more power to them. I would hazard that the vast majority of people do not do so and we had best not impose unnatural moral values on them.

I do not care that Clinton messed around, nor do I care that the general did so; my issue is that they did so (apparently) in a deceitful manner towards their spouse. Who knows, there is the possibility that their wives tacitly accepted that their men would mess around and only did not want it to become common knowledge and thereby become an embarrassment.

[marions ghost]

105. A sense of entitlement

and lust for power is what drives these high-profile affairs more than sex. You're mixing this up with the argument that humans are not by nature monogamous. That's a whole other debate IMO.

[Whisp]

2. freaking asshole Gergen. how Great are you then, Davie?

David has something to hide.

[psychopomp]

96. Gergen is a first-class NWO mouthpiece

but I respect him for speaking his mind. I am quite sure that, being none of your business, his sexual history is nothing that needs to be hidden. It is, by nature, something so private that nobody has a right to know its minutae. As is mine, yours and that of everyone else.

[Whisp]

97. Gergen is a gurgling shill and deserves no respect.

he works for CNN. enough said.

[Zoeisright]

3. There's "repuke family values" for you.

In a nutshell.

And btw, Gergen, you fucker - did you say the same thing about President Clinton?

[Kaleva]

9. or LBJ or JFK or Ike or FDR.

[demmis19566ie]

12. Very true

And this guy is a disgusting pig.

[Honeycombe8]

60. Apparently he did. He made a good point about Clinton.

Clinton's big mistake was not his sexual flings. It was, as is so often the case, the coverup. Bringing other people into the lies, lying under oath, lying to the general public on TV. And, of course, having a fling with a barely legal subordinate. That's a no-no.

As far as great men having affairs (on the supposition that it relieves stress, I guess?), you don't have to be "great" to have an affair. Don't stats show that MOST men have affairs? That means that most of the men on TV talking about this are having affairs of their own.

Of course, women have affairs, too.

But when you're in a delicate, high level, nat'l security position, the rules are different for you. You can't just go out and tie one on, for example, pole dancin' and such, just 'cause you feel like it.

[Sekhmets Daughter]

5. And here I thought he was a good family values

republican....These people are truly amazing.

[hobbit709]

50. Being a hypocrite is one of their family values.

In fact it's the mainstay of their values.

[BainsBane]

6. the truth is lots of men have affairs

great and small.

[Kaleva]

14. Yes. It's not restricted to men in power.

[Fumesucker]

32. It's not restricted to men, either

Both parties in the Petraeus matter are married to other people.

[Kaleva]

42. It does take two people to have an affair

[loli phabay]

36. the truth is lots of people have affairs some with permission some without

Its probuably a lot more common than you would think.

[seabeyond]

69. truth be told, it is a small minority of people, both genders, that lack character.

has nothing to do with great or not, man or woman.

and it is not as many people as the cheaters like others to believe.

[On the Road]

87. It's Not Just the Cheaters

Kinsey estimated that about half of married men cheat. Unlike some of his other findings, this one has held up and been confirmed by more recent studies:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17951664/ns/health-sexual_health/t/many-cheat-thrill-more-stay-true-love/
http://www.catalogs.com/info/relationships/percentage-of-married-couples-who-cheat-on-each-ot.html
http://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/five-myths-about-cheating/2012/02/08/gIQANGdaBR_story.html

If you believe that everyone who has an affair "lacks character," then you have to apply that to Martin Luther King, Franklin Roosevelt, John Kennedy, and whole host of other liberal icons and people who are otherwise great human beings. You might be in the minority on this.

It is true that some people have no moral bounds, but a lot of people overstep their bounds when they are confident, sanguine, and full of life. It is not inevitable, nor is it excusable, but it is human nature.

[seabeyond]

91. cheaters like to believe everyone does it. ya, about character.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=1778119

[On the Road]

113. That is Interesting

I had no idea the estimates were so divergent. I have seen several studies reported in the 50% range, but the study you cited is very respectable.

There is obviously nothing wrong with condemning infidelity. My point was when you characterize half the population as having no character, you have to reexamine the question. You can say it's a flaw or a sin, but if it's that widespread it looks more like a matter of human nature.

[seabeyond]

114. a person is making the choice to hurt another person.

we do, or we dont.

it is a process. once you step over the line of can i.... it is a matter of convincing yourself you can. then comes excuses and validations in committing the behavior that will hurt another. it is a process. but, process it is.

it really bother me when people say, we are all capable. ya, we can all do it. doesn't mean we all would ever do it for any reason.

no different from when someone hits another. and they say, he/she lost it. not really. ever. their is a point when one decides.

i think it is about character.

i looked for a study that i had read recently where they exactly said, not about gender, about character. they had other indicators for strong character and lack of character. i couldnt find it.

but, just recently there was a study saying the majority of people that cheat, also had a parent that cheated. that is validation for behavior thru example.

it is like saying that 75-92% (depending on study) of women that get into prostitution were sexually abused as children.

not all that are sexually abused get into prostitution. but the vast majority in prostitution were abused.

the same with this. not all who had parents cheat. but, the majority that cheat had at least one parent that did.

i do not look at it as a moral issue. or religious right or wrong.

pragmatically.

[leftstreet]

7. Isn't Gergen the CNN guy who looks like Elmer Fudd? n/t

[regnaD kciN]

8. Gee...I guess I'm not a great enough man...

[BainsBane]

10. But if I were Mrs. Gergen

I just might hire a private detective.

[Enrique]

15. exactly

David might as well scream his confession from the rooftops.

[Lefta Dissenter]

67. Bingo! (n/t)

[struggle4progress]

76. +

[frazzled]

11. That's what he said about Clinton, right?

Oh, wrong. That's not what he said. He talked about "fouling the nest."

"We have our own set of village rules," says David Gergen, editor at large at U.S. News & World Report, who worked for both the Reagan and Clinton White House. "Sex did not violate those rules. The deep and searing violation took place when he not only lied to the country, but co-opted his friends and lied to them. That is one on which people choke.

"We all live together, we have a sense of community, there's a small-town quality here. We all understand we do certain things, we make certain compromises. But when you have gone over the line, you won't bring others into it. That is a cardinal rule of the village. You don't foul the nest."

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/politics/special/clinton/stories/quinn110298.htm

[trumad]

16. LOL

I just posted the same thing above in my OP a minute after you did.

[CTyankee]

31. Oh, yeah, I remember the "village rules." Cokie Roberts used to cluck about that too...

Now it is all so different...

Gergen needs to GO AWAY!

[PoliticAverse]

13. I wonder what percentage of the 43 US Presidents have had affairs while in office. n/t

[BainsBane]

17. a majority

Obama and W are probably exceptions. You know Obama hasn't. That would be running 24/7 on Fox.

[ForgoTheConsequence]

52. Carter

Something tells me he wouldn't.

[NoPasaran]

54. Carter proclaimed he had committed adultery in his heart

I always thought he was a bit of a prig.

[jberryhill]

83. That's because it is a Bible verse he was referring to

[NoPasaran]

88. Yes, the great Jimmy Carter

The man who brought nutball religion to the national political stage. We have yet to recover.

[jberryhill]

101. Jimmy Carter was hardly the first president to quote Bible passages

[NoPasaran]

112. He was the first to yack about that "born again" foolishness

He opened the floodgates and the Republicans out-Jesused us.

[ForgoTheConsequence]

111. He wasn't the first to bring in religion.

And I would rather have a "love thy neighbor" "my brothers keeper" Christian than the Jesus was a homophobic free market capitalist Christians that run rampant in politics today.

[BainsBane]

110. Agreed

He "lusted in his heart," if you'll recall. So no, he didn't, at least not while in the White House.

[WinkyDink]

18. It's not a nice thing to endorse, but it seems to be not a huge exaggeration.

JFK. Ike. Clinton. FDR. Jefferson. Tiger Woods.

Hahahaha! Just thought I'd throw that one in.

[Archae]

22. Warren Harding sounds like he was the worst.

He conceived a kid in a White House closet!

[Ikonoklast]

86. "Ma! Ma! Where's my Pa?"

"Gone to the White House, haw haw haw!"

Grover Cleveland.

[kskiska]

104. Grover Cleveland was single when he fathered the child

He married for the first time during his second term.

[a kennedy]

19. Small dicks, leading BIG DICKS.....

Ugh....I'm so sick and tired of "leaders" whomever they may be being lead around by their lust of women.....UGH..... I just can NOT deal with it. Am I the only one that feels this way???

[CTyankee]

39. It happens but the David Gergens of the world are even worse. They GLORIFY and RATIONALIZE

it!

It's a total disgrace. Gergen should go away...

[seabeyond]

74. it is all about the ego. nt

[Blue_Tires]

20. Gergen -- "Pimpin' ain't easy?"

[BeyondGeography]

21. David Gergen on sex

Is anyone else thinking bestseller here?

[BainsBane]

23. David Gergen and sex

are not words that go together in my mind.

[vankuria]

25. Almost puked on my keyboard

[butterfly77]

26. Lol!

[LeftInTX]

24. Steamy...

[geardaddy]

27. Ewww, Gergen's gherkin.

[Whisp]

30. must be one of those mini dills.

to match his mini brains.

that's what they say, you know.

[moondust]

28. Good soldiers are disciplined.

Petraeus certainly knew an affair, if discovered, would cost his top secret clearance and career yet he didn't have the discipline to resist. And somebody that public will have trouble hiding everything.

Civil servants and military don't get the same treatment as elected officials in such cases but I don't know the details. Look at all the congressmen and senators and at least one President who remained in office after extramarital activities became known.

[ljm2002]

29. Typical patriarchal BS...

...where "great men" are allowed their peccadilloes, or their harems... The reason it did not apply to Clinton, of course, is that in Gergen's world Clinton was not a "great man". But the neocon general Petraeus, of course he's a "great man" and we lesser beings should not be allowed to sit in judgment. And too bad about wifey, but you know, women exist primarily to serve their mast... er, their menfolk. And the deal you make as a wife is, he supports you financially and you support him in everything else without question.

Well guess what Mr. Gergen: Petraeus used piss-poor judgment at the very least, as evidenced by the classified materials that were found on his lady-love's computer. So while I don't give a damn about his personal life, I do give a damn about how he conducts himself when he's the general in charge of our entire operation in Afghanistan, and then when he becomes the head of the freakin' CIA!

[bongbong]

33. Gergen is just stating one of the standard rules of DC & the MSM

IOKIYAR

[nadinbrzezinski]

34. Mr Gergen you are aware

That adultery is subject to the UCMJ and both parties wore, one still does as a reservist, wear the uniform of the US Army?

[CTyankee]

40. I am sure Mr. Gergen isn't aware since I am sure he never served in the Armed Services of the U.S.

[stevenleser]

35. I've got two problems with this.

1. Great "Men" have affairs.
No, a large percentage of ALL people, male or female, rich or poor, famous or not, have affairs. Do I think most of them should lose their job for it? No. Nor does it make someone 'great' to have an affair.

2. Gergen did not say the same thing about Clinton when the same thing was going on.

[Douglas Carpenter]

37. Oh REALLY!!??

Name one

[hrmjustin]

38. One thing we know is that David Gergen is not a great man.

[Initech]

41. And then these assholes have the balls to tell us who can and cannot get married.

Fuck off if you're an adulterer apologist like that.

[Major Hogwash]

43. Gergen is just another rightwing cork soaker

And I think it is sofa king funny that he thinks his opinion means anything anymore.
Honestly, I don't pay any attention to him when he is talking about ANY subject.

[jillan]

44. Everyone wants to cheat BUT it takes a strong person to stay faithful.

[seabeyond]

99. i have never had a desire to cheat. and never will. please do not give it to "everyone".

[jsmirman]

45. Jesus, I knew his daughter well in college

A) a feminist

B) a great person and

C) a great writer.

I can't even imagine her listening to him say that.

[Shilo]

46. We all have difficult times---sheesh---

if this is the criteria David you are setting the bar very low, stupid man!!! Didn't know I was supposed to be having affairs during difficult times in my life. Boy I've been missing out

[Jack Sprat]

47. One thing for certain.

Gergen doesn't have to worry about having an affair. It just ain't happening for him. Only his Mom could go for that wildass comb-over.

[Matariki]

48. Rules of The Villiage?

Um, David - who is Number Two?

[union_maid]

49. These pundits and their man-crushes

Gergen is a bit of a tool, but he's far from alone in that.

[liberal N proud]

51. No Mr. Gergen, Truly GREAT men can keep their zippers closed!

Weak men let their little heads do the thinking and therefore have affairs.

[Cicada]

53. I don't care about their sex lives

If we didn't care blackmail would be less effective. I figure about 75% of our leaders have affairs and I don't think it relates to job performance.

[HappyMe]

55. People have affairs.

'Great' men and women and your average men and women. I'm not willing to place more blame on one gender or the other.

[wilt the stilt]

56. I actually think this is complicated

David Petraeus is the same age as me. 60 is an odd time in life. We are close to the end of our virility and we know it. After 40 years of marriage let's face it there is not the same sexual attraction as there was. Probably for David and Holly they were having relationships maybe 2-3 times a year. Tops 6 times a year. It just happens. Life has moved on for them. He meets a women who makes him feel wanted and special. He is getting attention like he hasn't had in years and even though he knows it is wrong he breaks down mentally. Sex like hate, greed and love and is very hard to control.
Many men and women in their fifties just want to be considered attractive and when a young women comes around and pays attention to you it is very difficult not to feel it. The same goes for women and if a man makes them feel attractive that is why that have affairs. It just a difficult time in life.

[union_maid]

58. Possible, or..

He could have been nailing everything he could from the his first deployment on.

[trumad]

59. It's not complicated at all...

Act like a fucking Man and keep your dick in your pants.

You want to play, then you pay.

If he was errrrr so lacking attention---then ask for a divorce and have at it.

He's a world class hypocrite who most likely signed off on many being discharged for the same behavior that he just got busted on.

[wilt the stilt]

62. Trumad

I don't think you are 60 but if you are and it's easy for you great. However for a lot of sixty something's I think it is a tough time.

[union_maid]

64. I'm kind of with Trumad here

I'll be 63 in a month and so will my husband. I think if you reach the age of 50, never mind 60, and still feel like being attractive to the opposite sex is the be all and end all to the point where you'd take monumentally stupid risks then there's a problem. Male or female. We're supposed to grow up at some point.

[wilt the stilt]

66. ask your husband

if what I say doesn't have some truth to it. I bet he says I am accurate. We all don't grow up the same. Men love their virility and we don't have menopause that signals an end. 60 is complicated for men. As much as we hate "trophy wives" it is the feeling of being viral that plays a great part in the action of divorcing and going with someone half their age.

[union_maid]

70. I know it is, but I still think it's dumb

People can still think. Women go through plenty of that at the age where they become "invisible" to men their own age, which is usually much younger. But if you let it go, it's kind of liberating. Hell, even among the single people I know who are my age, the ones in pursuit of validation from the opposite sex do not seem nearly as happy as the ones who don't worry about it much.

[wilt the stilt]

79. dumb and sex

can easily be tied together. Let's see did you ever have unprotected sex or sex in a car? How many people our age got pregnant in high school. Dumb but when sex is involved people are dumb.

[seabeyond]

77. of course it is hard. getting old is hard. it is about the ego. some people grow out of their ego

and that ego does not control their life. others need that ego stroked to feel their worth.

it is about character.

to the world petreaous looks like a foolish old man. not a way to end his public life.

[trumad]

89. No I'm 55 and been married 21 years.

It's an easy choice for me... Lie to my wife, kids and friends and pretty much humiliate them----orrrrrrrrrrr---- listen to my dick and not give a shit.

Again---if it's ohhhh so miserable and you just can't take it anymore,,,,, be a Man, ask for a divorce, and then have at it.

That's being a MAN!

[Ganja Ninja]

57. People like sex, sometimes in groups, sometimes with people other than their spouses.

Especially in the Military where spouses are away for long periods of time.

[trumad]

61. Nothing to do with what Gergen said.

[Bosso 63]

63. Affairs are wrong.

But, as a culture, I think it would be better if we moved toward the "French" side of the continuum and away from the "Puritan" end.

[trumad]

73. Really?

Lying to your spouse and family...?

[Bosso 63]

75. What part of "wrong" isn't clear?

[seabeyond]

81. the french is just an older more true patriarchal system where women have to allow and accept a man

screwing around, cause their society says so.

it is wonderful for the men. like affairs were accepted much more readily from men in the past in the u.s.

not so fair to the women.

ask those sophisticated french men how they feel about their women having affairs. not so much.

yes, a man is always pointing to the french, or the italians.

bet in todays world, women in france are not nearly so accepting just like women in american.

[Bosso 63]

85. Well then let the stoning begin.

[seabeyond]

90. wow... i guess you prefer repug argument. no thanks. nt

[Bosso 63]

100. I don't think having an affair should in and of itself, erase all the positive things that a person

their life. I think Bill Clinton did a crappy thing, but he also did positive things. If that is agreeing with the "repug position", then I'm guilty as charged.

Just to be clear, I think its WRONG to have an affair. My point is that human beings make mistakes, and if you see that then I don't know what to tell you.

[seabeyond]

102. the repug argument is not addressing what was actually posted, but addressing it with an absurd

conclusion. that is the fail.

like, questioning going to war in iraq. the repug will say. so you want all the muslims to come over here and kill us all.

and it absolutely is about character.

[Bosso 63]

108. Read the article.

[RandiFan1290]

65. David "Bohemian Grove" Gergen??

Nooo! Can't be true!

[seabeyond]

68. first, was she a great woman just having an affair? or does that excuse not fly for a woman. or

her part insignificant, jsut a use for that great man.

and am i getting this right? the problem is the friends being lied to? fuck the mates being lied to. but the problems is the friends?

wow

[HappyMe]

72. There's really no excuse for

his or her behavior. They ruined their spouses lives with their selfishness. There's nothing 'great' about either of them at this point.

[seabeyond]

82. i couldnt agree more. leave then play, or dont play. nt

[MoonRiver]

71. Some men have affairs.

We just hear about them when those men are "great."

David Gergen

[get the red out]

78. And Newt Gingrich keeps getting trotted out

The Today Show interviewed him yesterday about the Petraeus deal. OMG! Insane.

[hlthe2b]

80. Typical Rethuglican misogynist...

which might give any male DUers thinking similarly some pause....Is this really an attitude you'd like to share with RETHUGs? (hopefully they are infinitesimally few and far in between)

[no_hypocrisy]

84. Does that mean that Mitt Romney isn't/wasn't great?

[rsweets]

92. No David, dumb asses who don't realize their going to get caught

have affairs ...

[Anthony McCarthy]

93. From above

The truth is lots of men have affairs

And they mostly have them with women who are having an affair too.

The affair is a private matter, the world of military adulation that this exposes and possible impact on public policy are dangerous.

[Sivart]

95. Gergen looks like Roger

I think Gergen looks like Roger...

[link:|

[Horse with no Name]

98. It's not the sex. It is the security breach that is the issue

You cannot have secrets and be the top Spy at the CIA.

It compromises you.

End of story.

I don't care where ANYONE puts their dick--as long as it is in a consenting adult.

But this shit is not what is important.

He fucked around. His girlfriend got into his computer....and there was a massive breach of security.

The fucking is incidental.

[AngryAmish]

103. I know a fair number of men who have received money and power

The people out after power are by and large weirdos for whom every relationship is transactional. They tend not to have friends, more like people who can get them things. Their married life is like that too. They tend to marry young to a daughter of a rich guy/daughter of a powerful guy. Think Blago. Actually Petreius also I guess. Later in life they feel entitled to cheat since their marriage is strictly transactional and the wife spends all the money - really, they think like this. Again, they are weirdos. This is why I think politicians should be despised.

The people who are suddenly wealthy can still be normal. They have a better car and nicer vacations but the family is still important. Or they start screwing the secretary.

Short versions: People with more options cheat more.

[seabeyond]

106. i think you are correct. users. users tend to be more successful and they use thru out life

it works for them, in gaining things which validate their life from their perspective.

[Odin2005]

107. A Puke cheats, it's OK; a Democrat cheats, and he gets impeached.

Fuck you, David!

[global1]

109. What About Gergen's Ties To Bain And Broadwell?....

Oh the strange webs we weave.

Check out this post and read about Gergen, Bain and Broadwell and check out the pic of Broadwell with Rove.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10021798317

Anytime something strange is going on in government circles - think the Valerie Plame outing - Rove just happens to be involved like Forest Gump.

Is my tinfoil hat on too tight?...... Hmmmmm........

[Tierra_y_Libertad]

115. And, so do a helluva lot of not-so "Great" men....and women.