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Fawke Em

(11,366 posts)
Mon Dec 17, 2012, 10:00 PM Dec 2012

I'm the mother of an extremely bright male who loves video games.

He plays some violent ones, some sports ones and some figure-em-out ones.

He does NOT have a personality disorder. He is NOT diagnosed with any disorder, physically or mentally, of any kind. He IS a child of divorce, but now has a father-figure in my second husband; however, my husband is bio-polar, but treated.

My son is only 13 and I've read that personality disorders don't show up until the late teens and/or early twenties.

I don't want to alarm myself, but I don't want to be uninformed. I've done some Google searching, but can't find a website that tells me - or at least informs me - about what I should look for later on... or even if I should worry (at this point, I don't, but information and education is key).

Any DUer know of any sort of in-depth article?

I am not one to apply things that don't exist. I just want to be aware.


(BTW, we have no guns in the house, despite the fact that my husband was in the Army, which was, thankfully, where he was diagnosed and has been properly treated, even after his service).

44 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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I'm the mother of an extremely bright male who loves video games. (Original Post) Fawke Em Dec 2012 OP
Because when I think unbiased, nonhysterical information about mental illness and violence Codeine Dec 2012 #1
... leftstreet Dec 2012 #2
LOL. I get ya. Fawke Em Dec 2012 #4
+1 n/t lumberjack_jeff Dec 2012 #5
Your son is fine. Odin2005 Dec 2012 #3
I'm trying not to. Fawke Em Dec 2012 #6
I played Doom and Mortal Kombat as a kid. Odin2005 Dec 2012 #10
Wanna hear something funny? Fawke Em Dec 2012 #14
LMAO! Odin2005 Dec 2012 #27
I'm bipolar and raising 2 teen boys, 13ish and 15ish. They love the GreenPartyVoter Dec 2012 #7
Thank you! Fawke Em Dec 2012 #16
There are a lot of people in the world who want to tell us how much we suck at raising our kids, but GreenPartyVoter Dec 2012 #18
If your kid was a potential Adam Lanza maxsolomon Dec 2012 #8
Your son is fine nadinbrzezinski Dec 2012 #9
and for the link Livluvgrow Dec 2012 #30
You mean from one of the many nadinbrzezinski Dec 2012 #31
People like me Livluvgrow Dec 2012 #34
It's the same pattern. nadinbrzezinski Dec 2012 #38
One thing is certain. There is no harm if he does NOT play violent video games. Honeycombe8 Dec 2012 #11
So what about all the violence before video games? Confusious Dec 2012 #13
You'll have to ask the scientists and doctors that. I just quoted them. Honeycombe8 Dec 2012 #15
I looked the "banning" up once Confusious Dec 2012 #17
The banned violent video games in Australia: Honeycombe8 Dec 2012 #21
That would be the brazil list Confusious Dec 2012 #24
Yes, I saw that. But it concluded there is a link. That's the point. There are NO studies... Honeycombe8 Dec 2012 #22
Here's the problem Confusious Dec 2012 #26
I read some of this, but... my son is not Fawke Em Dec 2012 #19
The studies concluded that violent video games are a strong predictor of future violence... Honeycombe8 Dec 2012 #23
Study: no link between violence and video games Confusious Dec 2012 #28
What you should do is spend public interaction time with your son. bluestate10 Dec 2012 #12
We do this. Fawke Em Dec 2012 #35
Does he have friends? Barack_America Dec 2012 #20
Follow Aristotle's advice... moderation in all things. Even video games. reformist2 Dec 2012 #25
Mine is now studying computer science, because he liked video games jberryhill Dec 2012 #29
I love the Laughing Cow Fawke Em Dec 2012 #37
It used to scare me when I was little jberryhill Dec 2012 #40
Why? Fawke Em Dec 2012 #41
The danger signs are exactly the same with or without video games jeff47 Dec 2012 #32
My son would DIE before he'd harm an animal. Fawke Em Dec 2012 #36
This is very rare in the entire scheme of things. dkf Dec 2012 #33
I read that on Sunday. Fawke Em Dec 2012 #39
I imagine it's easy to be bored if you have already gotten beyond that level. dkf Dec 2012 #42
So was I. Fawke Em Dec 2012 #43
It wasn't the parents, but the school systems and their lack of rigidity. dkf Dec 2012 #44
 

Codeine

(25,586 posts)
1. Because when I think unbiased, nonhysterical information about mental illness and violence
Mon Dec 17, 2012, 10:02 PM
Dec 2012

I think DU!

Fawke Em

(11,366 posts)
4. LOL. I get ya.
Mon Dec 17, 2012, 10:07 PM
Dec 2012

But, there are some thoughtful folks here.

I can suss out the difference between crap and education. Which is actually my problem. The only thing I've been able to Google is crap.

Fawke Em

(11,366 posts)
6. I'm trying not to.
Mon Dec 17, 2012, 10:09 PM
Dec 2012

I read some of the anti-video games shit at lunch and thought: "Um, my kid plays those, but he also feeds and waters two of our five dogs every day, twice a day and gets hurt when he hears of small children and animals who are abused."

I know he's normal, but I'm a Mom... I'm entitled to worry... just a bit.

Fawke Em

(11,366 posts)
14. Wanna hear something funny?
Mon Dec 17, 2012, 11:34 PM
Dec 2012

So did I.

My son thinks I hung the moon because I know what Mortal Kombat is and how to spell it.

GreenPartyVoter

(72,381 posts)
7. I'm bipolar and raising 2 teen boys, 13ish and 15ish. They love the
Mon Dec 17, 2012, 10:15 PM
Dec 2012

violent games. Can't get enough of beating on zombies lately.

I am not worried about the effect on them because my bro and hubby and I all have:

Played video games since Pong.
Played D&D.
Listened to heavy metal music.
Seen a pile of Hollywood's greatest shoot 'em up flicks.

We are all fine upstanding citizens and have never hurt a fly. I am on meds. Sometimes those meds don't work and make things worse. I still haven't killed anyone, I just hang in there, go off the meds, and try something else.

I would be far more worried about what my boys would be like if they joined the military and ended up in a war zone than I am about games and movies. I think PTSD from seeing real violence, from really killing people, is the real horror but we never talk about that. Just how scary fake violence is. *scratching head*

Fawke Em

(11,366 posts)
16. Thank you!
Mon Dec 17, 2012, 11:40 PM
Dec 2012

I love the zombie games, too!

And, my hubby's bi-polar. Take your meds, you're OK. I have allergies. I neglect my meds... then I'm worthless. Take my meds... I'm OK. Why is there some difference?

My question was, I guess, that I'm supposed to feel bad that my perfectly, normal, adjusted son plays violent video games, when I know that was a stupid premise.

GreenPartyVoter

(72,381 posts)
18. There are a lot of people in the world who want to tell us how much we suck at raising our kids, but
Mon Dec 17, 2012, 11:42 PM
Dec 2012

I think most of us are doing ok. (And the fact that you were worrying a little, tells me you probably are too.)

maxsolomon

(33,400 posts)
8. If your kid was a potential Adam Lanza
Mon Dec 17, 2012, 10:32 PM
Dec 2012

You'd know it by now. That kid was fucked up from the start - didn't feel pain, flat affect.

Manic depression is still possible. My ex brother in law had his 1st manic episode at 17-18.

 

nadinbrzezinski

(154,021 posts)
31. You mean from one of the many
Tue Dec 18, 2012, 12:11 AM
Dec 2012

Non conclusive studies?

You know, people like you blamed comics for all evil in the 1950s. So while you blame video games, what about that gnarly 90 capacity drum used at Sandy Hook?

Livluvgrow

(377 posts)
34. People like me
Tue Dec 18, 2012, 12:23 AM
Dec 2012

have we met? I think the issues faced in this country are much larger than just comics from the 1950s, or violence in our multimedia, or lack of gun control. You know one issue I notice though is the gaming folks are no different then the gun folks. It is about the individual not the collective and they are not even willing to entertain the idea that there are issues that should be looked at. I guess with that logic porn doesn't create negative treatment towards women. I guess certain rap music doesn't create a negative stereotype either because I was able to listen to easy e and NWA and I was certainly not mean to women. Were others though hmmmmm?

 

nadinbrzezinski

(154,021 posts)
38. It's the same pattern.
Tue Dec 18, 2012, 12:28 AM
Dec 2012

Blame fringe culture for the problems.

Look, the clearest tie between video games and an actual crime was one murder in a single year. That is one out of 34000 murders. You think video games have anything to do with gang wars too, or murders due to robberies of store clerks? How about suicides, this is the number one cause if gun related death.

Here

The search for meaning is a natural response to any tragedy, and the latest U.S. mass shooting is eliciting questions about, among other things, the potential role of violent video games. After all, with kids and increasingly teenagers spending so much time hammering away at simulated shooters, is it any wonder when they pick up actual guns? Obama campaign adviser David Axelrod lamented on Twitter, “In NFL post-game: an ad for shoot ‘em up video game. All for curbing weapons of war. But shouldn’t we also quit marketing murder as a game?”

But it turns out that the data just doesn’t support this connection. Looking at the world’s 10 largest video game markets yields no evident, statistical correlation between video game consumption and gun-related killings.

It’s true that Americans spend billions of dollars on video games every year and that the United States has the highest firearm murder rate in the developed world. But other countries where video games are popular have much lower firearm-related murder rates. In fact, countries where video game consumption is highest tend to be some of the safest countries in the world, likely a product of the fact that developed or rich countries, where consumers can afford expensive games, have on average much less violent crime.


http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/worldviews/wp/2012/12/17/ten-country-comparison-suggests-theres-little-or-no-link-between-video-games-and-gun-murders/

Honeycombe8

(37,648 posts)
11. One thing is certain. There is no harm if he does NOT play violent video games.
Mon Dec 17, 2012, 10:50 PM
Dec 2012

So you start with that knowledge, and work from there. QUESTION: Aren't violent video games age-rated or something?

His brain is not fully developed. He is very impressionable. He doesn't have an adult's life experiences or judgment about things. That's why there are laws protecting minors.

But that doesn't mean that violent video games WILL be harmful to him (and by extension, the family). You know how it is that some people can be exposed to, say, divorce, and have it not affect them much at all, but it deeply affects others. People are different.

Here's an article: EFFECTS OF VIOLENT VIDEO GAMES ON AGGRESSIVE BEHAVIOR, AGGRESSIVE COGNITION, AGGRESSIVE
AFFECT, PHYSIOLOGICAL AROUSAL, AND PROSOCIAL BEHAVIOR: A Meta-Analytic Review of the Scientific Literature
By Craig A. Anderson and Brad J. Bushman
Iowa State University

www.soc.iastate.edu/sapp/videogames1.pdf

This paper was done in 2001 because, as the paper says:
Paducah, Kentucky. Jonesboro, Arkansas. Littleton, Colorado.
These three towns recently experienced similar multiple school
shootings. The shooters were students who habitually played
violent video games. Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold, the Columbine
High School students who murdered 13 people and
wounded 23 in Littleton, before killing themselves, enjoyed
playing the bloody video game Doom. Harris created a customized
version of Doom with two shooters, extra weapons, unlimited
ammunition, and victims who could not fight back—features
that are eerily similar to aspects of the actual shootings.


I can't get the link to that to work, but you can Google it.

Here's another news article:
http://articles.cnn.com/2008-11-03/health/healthmag.violent.video.kids_1_violent-video-video-games-game-genres?_s=PM:HEALTH
In every group, children who were exposed to more video game violence did become more aggressive over time than their peers who had less exposure. This was true even after the researchers took into account how aggressive the children were at the beginning of the study -- a strong predictor of future bad behavior.


Here's another one:
http://voices.yahoo.com/does-violence-video-games-cause-violence-real-11644776.html?cat=5

While the APA admits that some scientific studies show very little connection between video games and violence, it notes that an overall analysis of all relevant studies demonstrate that video games are violence are related. In fact, the APA goes as far as to conclude that "violent video game effect sizes are larger than the effect of second hand smoke on lung cancer, the effect of lead exposure to I.Q. scores in children, and calcium intake on bone mass." Furthermore, the APA states that everyone can be affected by playing violent video games, even those who are supposedly less at risk of being influenced. Therefore, the APA concludes that violence in video games is a significant risk factor for violent behavior.

Confusious

(8,317 posts)
13. So what about all the violence before video games?
Mon Dec 17, 2012, 11:20 PM
Dec 2012

I'm pretty sure video games weren't around during WW1, WW2, Korea, Vietnam, the gulf war I.

I'm also sure that Mass Murders happened before, oh, let's say 2000, that's when the pretty realistic shooters started coming out.

Surprisingly, children getting into trouble has gone down since the introduction of video games.

Just another thing that some people don't do so they want to blame it.

"Rock and Roll will lead to the breakdown of morality!" remember that guy? you're him.

Honeycombe8

(37,648 posts)
15. You'll have to ask the scientists and doctors that. I just quoted them.
Mon Dec 17, 2012, 11:35 PM
Dec 2012

Vegetables are good for you. Too much sugar is bad for you and your teeth. Can you grow up healthy without eating vegetables and with eating too much sugar? Sure. But studies say there is a relation between those things and good health.

It's the same thing.

Were kids unhealthy before processed foods, when they ate vegetables and didn't have access to refined sugar? Of course. Why...I don't know. You'll have to do research on that, and use your noggin.

I think you may be in denial. You don't like what the research shows. It shows a strong link. It does not show that kids will become murderers, though.

If it were my kid, I'd play it safe and forbid violent video games. There are video games that are not violent, and plenty of other things to do (like playing outside or sports, and getting some exercise). Just like I'd play it safe and make him eat vegetables and curtail the refined sugar. Just to have more sureness of a healthy mind and body. But that's me. I don't pay attention to all studies, but there are a lot of studies out there; they seem pretty conclusive. Maybe they'll change in the future.

Some countries have banned them outright, or just the bloodiest ones. In Australia you have to be 18 to buy one of the lesser violent ones; the more violent ones are banned outright and cannot be brought into the country. (Mortal Kombat is one of those.) Australia had a mass killing problem, so it addressed assault weapons and violent video games. It seems to have worked.

Confusious

(8,317 posts)
17. I looked the "banning" up once
Mon Dec 17, 2012, 11:42 PM
Dec 2012

Very, very, very few are banned. 1 a year MAYBE. So no dice there.

They can't be sold in stores, but they can be ordered online, so again, no dice.

The studies aren't conclusive, they're bullshit for a new round of morality crusaders.

Oh, and about that study you quoted:

Video games have been studied for links to addiction and aggression. Before this meta-analyses were conflicting. A 2001 study found that exposure to violent video games correlates with at least a temporary increase in aggression. A decrease in prosocial behavior (caring about the welfare and rights of others) was also noted.[1] Another 2001 meta-analysis using similar methods[2] and a more recent 2009 study focusing specifically on serious aggressive behavior[3] concluded that video game violence is not related to serious aggressive behavior in real life. Many potential positive effects have been proposed.[4] Recent research has suggested that some violent video games may actually have a prosocial effect in some contexts, for example, team play.[5]

It has been argued there is generally a lack of quality studies which can be relied upon and that the video game industry has become an easy target for the media to blame for many modern day problems.[6][7][8] The most recent large scale meta-analysis, examining 130 studies with over 130,000 subjects worldwide, concluded that exposure to violent video games causes both short term and long term aggression in players and decreases empathy and prosocial behavior. However, this meta-analysis was severely criticized in the same issue of the same journal for a number of methodological flaws, including failure to distinguish clinically valid from unstandardized aggression measures and for failing to solicit studies from researchers who have questioned whether causal links exist, thus biasing the sample of included studies.[9]


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Video_game_controversies

I think you may be in denial. You don't like what the research shows. It shows a strong link.


It shows nothing of the sort, and all the studies have flaws. You are a case study in conformation bias if I ever saw it.

Like I said, you are the anti-rock and roll morality crusader of our time.

Honeycombe8

(37,648 posts)
21. The banned violent video games in Australia:
Mon Dec 17, 2012, 11:47 PM
Dec 2012

All violent ones are rated age 18. The more violent ones are banned outright. Here's a list from Wikepedia. I'm sure the list is changed as new games come out. It's not the # of games. It's the fact that Australia did in fact change the ratings on lesser violent ones, and banned the bloodier ones, in an effort to deal with mass killings. Their efforts seem to have worked.


Blood

Banned because of high impact violence.



Bully (including Scholarship Edition)

Banned for showing violence and harassment in a school setting.



Carmageddon

Banned because of high impact violence against pedestrians.



Carmageddon II: Carpocalypse Now

Banned because of high impact violence against pedestrians.



Counter-Strike

Banned because of high impact violence. The ban was later lifted and game is now being sold once again. However, Retail sales of the game are still strictly prohibited.[7]



Doom

Banned because of very high impact violence and offensive depictions of cruelty.



Duke Nukem 3D

Banned because of high impact violence.



EverQuest

Banned because of X18+ references.[8]



Grand Theft Auto

Was banned because of high impact violence. This is only to the original GTA, and is no longer banned (save for the music-related Barueri ban of Episodes of Liberty City)



Grand Theft Auto: Episodes From Liberty City

Banned because it uses music by the Brazilian composer Hamilton da Silva Lourenço without permission. Also applies to DLC that use that music (the stock IV game does not feature the track).[9]



Mortal Kombat

Banned because of high impact violence and depictions of cruelty.



Requiem: Avenging Angel

Banned because of high impact violence.



Postal & Postal 2

Both banned because of high impact violence and offensive depictions of cruelty.

Confusious

(8,317 posts)
24. That would be the brazil list
Mon Dec 17, 2012, 11:55 PM
Dec 2012

I noticed because it had Everquest on it.

A. Brazil's violence is horrendous, even with the bannings.
B. Everquest is the most innocuous game ever. There's another reason then violence for some of those bannings.


It's the fact that Australia did in fact change the ratings on lesser violent ones, and banned the bloodier ones, in an effort to deal with mass killings. Their efforts seem to have worked.


Really. Would you happen to have a link for that, or are you just going to expect me to take your word for it? I usually don't do that, you see, or else I would be sending a lot of money to Nigeria.

Honeycombe8

(37,648 posts)
22. Yes, I saw that. But it concluded there is a link. That's the point. There are NO studies...
Mon Dec 17, 2012, 11:51 PM
Dec 2012

that conclude there is no link. Every single one I ran across concluded there is a link. That's pretty strong.

That was a 2001 study. There have been others done since then.

I'm just saying. We go by fewer studies than that to conclude that lack of calcium affects bone mass in children.

I'm not going to argue. The studies are there. Other countries have based their policy on it, and more importantly, in at least Australia, it worked. That's the point, right? To lessen the mass killings.

So I'm sure we all want to approach it from every reasonable angle. Not just the method (guns and ammo), but also the causes (exposure to violence, mental problems, drugs, etc.).

Confusious

(8,317 posts)
26. Here's the problem
Tue Dec 18, 2012, 12:00 AM
Dec 2012

They have to do their studies in a way that rules out biases.

Those studies have not done that, so their conclusions are bullshit. But you see them and you agree with them so to you, no matter how flawed, they are gospel.

Other countries have based their policy on it, and more importantly, in at least Australia, it worked. That's the point, right? To lessen the mass killings.


I'm all for that, but not just doing shit to do shit. THAT IS THE COMPLETELY WRONG WAY TO GO ABOUT THINGS.

Again, do you have a link showing the reduction in violence due to banning video games.

Fawke Em

(11,366 posts)
19. I read some of this, but... my son is not
Mon Dec 17, 2012, 11:43 PM
Dec 2012

aggressive.

I smoke, btw, but outside, never inside, and my son is extremely tall and his bones are massive. Not sure what that has to do with anything.

Honeycombe8

(37,648 posts)
23. The studies concluded that violent video games are a strong predictor of future violence...
Mon Dec 17, 2012, 11:55 PM
Dec 2012

even when taking into account the agressiveness (or nonagressiveness) of the children at the beginning of the study. In other words, if a child is totally passive at the beginning, and he participates in violent video games for a certain period of time, the doctors can predict that he will be more violent in the future than children who did not participate in violent video games.

You have a right to raise your children how you want, though. Eat vegetables or not, eat candy or not, participate in violent video games or not, participate in sports or not, read books or not...whatever. You wanted information, so I posted some things. I could not find a study giving parents the clear go ahead on it...that concluded there was no link.

bluestate10

(10,942 posts)
12. What you should do is spend public interaction time with your son.
Mon Dec 17, 2012, 10:51 PM
Dec 2012

Go to a sit down eating place with him where waiters or waitresses have to serve you. Take him to places where he has to interact with other people that he does not know. Silently watch how he interacts to people and situations, without correcting him OR passing judgment. What you notice will tell you a large amount about what type of person your son truly is. If you see him react badly to other people, or make paranoid comments, you have problems and need to start figuring out stuff. Keep taking him out regularly and observing him as he becomes a teen and go through the teen years, those are the toughest years. Don't explain why you take him into the situations above other than explain to him as he grows older you want to spend more time with him before he leaves home to start his own life. BTW, just observe, don't smother him as Moms are tempted to do. He may get to the age where he gets a girlfriend and want to cut down on the public outings with you - but by then, you should have known a lot about your child and would be able to decide that butting out some is ok.

Fawke Em

(11,366 posts)
35. We do this.
Tue Dec 18, 2012, 12:24 AM
Dec 2012

We go to college football games and movies and restaurants.

I do spend time with him. But, again... oh... nevermind. I'm being a paranoid, worried Mom.

jeff47

(26,549 posts)
32. The danger signs are exactly the same with or without video games
Tue Dec 18, 2012, 12:13 AM
Dec 2012

Harm to animals is usually the first major danger sign.

You could also find out some more of what actually goes on in those video games. Virtually all first person shooters these days actually don't glorify violence - they are variations on "war is hell".

But much more importantly, you could watch him play. Find out what's actually going on in the game he's playing and talk to him to find out what he thinks about it.

Heck, earlier in the thread, you mentioned playing games back in your youth. So play with him. Let him have his own time, but set up a night when the two of you play together.

Fawke Em

(11,366 posts)
36. My son would DIE before he'd harm an animal.
Tue Dec 18, 2012, 12:25 AM
Dec 2012

I guess we're OK.

(He helps me feed and water five dogs and one cat daily)

Fawke Em

(11,366 posts)
39. I read that on Sunday.
Tue Dec 18, 2012, 12:29 AM
Dec 2012

I wondered why they didn't care when their intelligent son stopped liking school.

 

dkf

(37,305 posts)
42. I imagine it's easy to be bored if you have already gotten beyond that level.
Tue Dec 18, 2012, 12:53 AM
Dec 2012

Steve Jobs and Bill Gates both learned more from not being in class than being in class. But they also needed access to tools and equipment. Einstein also found his own way. All report being "bored" iirc.


Fawke Em

(11,366 posts)
43. So was I.
Tue Dec 18, 2012, 01:16 AM
Dec 2012

And I give my child challenges.

It's not that hard. And we're not rich like Jobs and Gates' parents.

 

dkf

(37,305 posts)
44. It wasn't the parents, but the school systems and their lack of rigidity.
Tue Dec 18, 2012, 01:38 AM
Dec 2012

Steve Jobs adoptive parents were middle class, no college degrees. His father was a mechanic his mother an accountant. Yes he doesn't generate much of a fuzzy feeling here, but what an interesting guy.



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