When you get really angry at someone do you use the N-word or say Faggot?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

It was implied in the the thread about Sean Penn's son that the paparazzi had it coming. And maybe the paparazzi is annoying, however no matter how mad i am or how much someone else deserved it, i have never used those words as a weapon.

I just assumed non-racist non-homophobic people did not.

So when you are angry do you say these words? If you do, do you think its justified because the other person is an asshole?

I decided eventually to spell out faggot, because i dont want people to confuse it with Fuck or something else that is not bigotry-loaded

47 votes, 1 pass | Time left: Unlimited
	Saying the N-word in anger is ok, so long as the other person deserved it
	0 (0%)
	Saying the word F*****t is ok, so long as the other person deserved it
	0 (0%)
	Saying both these words are ok, so long as the other person deserved it
	0 (0%)
	There are limited circumstances (specify below) where use of these words are appropriate
	1 (2%)
	No one should utter these words as weapons against others, no matter what
	46 (98%)
	1 DU member did not wish to select any of the options provided.
Show usernames Disclaimer: This is an Internet poll

[jollyreaper2112]

1. I use both

I call him a numpty fuckwit.

[treestar]

2. I thought you mean Fuck it

But now I see what you mean, so my vote is wrong.

There is no excuse for these words at any time. Hopper should have been raised better than that. In fact, seeing who his parents are, it seems he picked this up from the brats at school.

[UnrepentantLiberal]

91. You can change your vote.

[treestar]

101. Cool

Changed

[justiceischeap]

3. Hey SampleGirl, calling someone a Fa**ot is never okay. nt

[kestrel91316]

53. Her only post in 3 months is to say that it's ok to call someone a faggot.

I sent her a private message demanding that she apologize to DU and change her vote.

Effing hater.

[choie]

4. There are so many other

words you can use when you're angry - I believe you should NEVER, EVER use the words mentioned in the above no matter how angry or how much of an asshole the person is...

[HappyMe]

5. It took me a little while

to figure out the 'f***t' thing. I was thinking 'fuck it'.

[Scuba]

6. When I'm really angry I say nothing.

I've never regretted this habit.

[NCTraveler]

25. I cannot tell you how well this has served me.

I learned it at an early age. Walking away or taking some time to cool of before speaking when angry can do a lot of good. Words brought about from anger rarely bring about positive results.

[mythology]

117. Is there a trick to getting the idiots in your life to leave you alone when you're angry?

I try to walk away, I do things like put my head phones on or read a book, and yet the same blithering idiots who pissed me off don't quite seem to get that leaving me alone is a good idea. Fortunately I have one friend who has taken it upon himself to physically step between me and other people me when I'm in an emotionally bad place. In some ways he's kind of the George to my Lenny.

[dimbear]

136. I get speechless. I guess it's a weakness, but what can I do? I just walk away.

Not a choice, just the way I am.

[madinmaryland]

7. I don't condone the use of either word. I can understand that someone pushed to the brink

using the most vile and disgusting words, but that does not make it right. Actually what Elton John called someone a few years back ("vile, filthy pig&quot works for me.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

20. i dont know that i understand being racist because i was pushed to the brink

really, i dont get it

if say a black man was stalking me and i was insulting him, there are many many things i would say, but i wouldn't say n*. it's just not what i can access when i am angry

[cali]

8. Never. And I'd like to add that there are lots of perks to being famous

Lots. Far more perks than drawbacks. Learn to deal with the drawbacks gracefully.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

21. SO fucking true

[vi5]

9. 43 years old, never uttered either word.

Not once.

[MotherPetrie]

32. I'm over 60, and ditto!

[forestpath]

100. +1 And I wouldn't have anything do to with anyone who did.

[pnwmom]

97. Never. And I can't remember the last time I heard either word

except for in the movies. In the 1960's, I do remember old people using the N word. The F word, I can't even remember hearing it from anyone I knew.

[Skidmore]

127. Approaching 60 and I've never used them either. Not once.

[JohnnyLib2]

10. I don't, but hear and see both way too much--

angry or not, kids and many adults toss the words around in many situations.
Tough to change....

[Trajan]

11. It's pretty sad that you ask this

I am 56 years old, and I've known for 50 years that the n word must never be used, ever ...

I don't care how angry someone is; using either term is unacceptable ...

[JVS]

12. I don't. On the other hand, if someone else is looking for something nasty to call...

someone then I certainly can't say I'm shocked when they don't pull punches when it comes to selecting an insult. Those are well known to be hurtful and insulting words, which are exactly the kind of words people look for when they go off on someone.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

14. honestly, in my life i have only heard someone using the n-word as a insult once

and the guy was a racist (i mean, even aside from using the word)

People around me do get angry, yet never say the n-word

[JohnnyLib2]

24. Plus, using them casually is a sort of practice for heated situations

[JVS]

29. As a tactic, I think it works rather poorly to use some slurs. The last thing you want to do when...

an asshole cuts in front of you in the line at subway is leave her feeling like Rosa Parks because you chose the wrong insult. But if I employ a string of words that involve extreme sizism, lookism, and sexism (see if you can reconstruct it from the isms ), then I can rely on it to actually hurt her feelings.

[OriginalGeek]

13. Since you specified "as weapons"

I voted that way. I will never use those words as weapons and/or out of anger.

It does not bother me if I overhear two black people calling each other that - I do not have any idea what's in their hearts and the relationship between these two sample people is none of my business. Same with gay people.

I will not use the words because where I was raised the only way I ever heard them was as a vicious, hateful slur and I don't want any part of acting that way. But that's just for me.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

16. i definitely meant as a weapon as opposed to an ingroup honorific

[OriginalGeek]

30. My wife and I go play cards/games/party with our son and DIL often

they have a couple gay couples who are good friends that also come play and they use that and other words with each other all the time. I know they are trying to be funny and maybe they are trying to let us know they are "OK"...but sometimes I wonder if they feel like they "need" to do that or if they just really go home and call each other that anyway.

Are they putting on a show for me and my wife? I don't want to accuse them of that but it would kind of make me sad if they felt like they need to do that. One couple we've known for years and the other just in the last year and they are more likely than the first couple to use those words. I wish there was a way I could let them know that - if they were doing it on purpose to fit in or whatever - they don't have to. My wife and I love them and want them to feel completely and naturally comfortable.

I guess the best course for me is to simply continue being their friend and as we get to know each other better they will come to know that they have an ally here.

[JanMichael]

15. No-- but-- my wife has a good friend

an African American male librarian....they were in the car one day on the way to a class on antique books, and a car full of young (eighteen y.o. or so) African Americans pulled up beside them at a stop light. This was a college town, with two large state universities in the area, so cars full of teenage boys was normal, and constant-

Their music was blariing....that "thumpa thumpa thumpa" music teenagers love to blast-

The friend rolled down the windows and yelled "N*****s! Turn that shit DOWN!"

My wife freaked out because they looked like typical college students to her, and she assumed that she might be seeing them in the library-

But, her friend didn't have a problem at all with it, AND the young guys turned their music down.

So...my question is....is the use of that word OK in certain circles, and used by African Americans?

We would not use it...ever, under any circumstance-- period.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

18. because african americans haven't lynched each other using that word

or deprived each other of jobs. there is context and a long violent oppressive history as to why whites can't say it

reclaiming a word, maybe a politically strategy some people believe in and others dont, however history & context is something everyone can believe in

[bettyellen]

34. perfect explanation, thanks Pri!

[La Lioness Priyanka]

49. i teach psychology of stereotyping and discrimination

where this question comes up a lot

[Cleita]

104. I think it's okay for AF. Amer. to call each other that name, but no one else.

I mean hip hoppers do it all the time to each other, but I don't think David Letterman should do it to a hip hopper he's having a friendly conversation with on his show, if you get what I mean.

[magellan]

17. I learned to cuss with the best of them when I was in the military

But those two words are not part of my vocabulary. The 'n' word is one I've never used. I probably used the 'f' word as a child forty odd years ago before I was old enough to know better.

When I hear someone use either word now, I think "asshat".

[kudzu22]

19. The only times I've ever used those words are in quoting someone else

and even then it's uncomfortable.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

22. agreed

[Starry Messenger]

23. Samplegirl samples:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x8010451

Someone who should have been offloaded from here years ago.

[bullwinkle428]

38. Damn- that thread makes me sad. Lots of really good DUers

attempting to counter the bullshit posted in the OP, who are no longer around.

[Starry Messenger]

39. Same here.

Lots of good folks no longer around anymore.

[In_The_Wind]

26. I never use those words.

I will not tolerate it anywhere.

[UnrepentantLiberal]

27. Never have, never will.

I'm very good at pissing people off when they piss me off without using a word that is going to make me feel like a fucked up piece of shit.

[BlueCaliDem]

28. No. Never. Both of those words leave a bad taste in my mouth.

Just as they should with everyone.

[Glaug-Eldare]

31. I have, and probably will again, but I know it's wrong.

Bigotry exists deep down in me, and I know it, but my intellect and compassion normally prevent it from affecting my actions. Extreme anger makes me stupid, and has occasionally allowed horrible thoughts to bubble up and express themselves. I've never said "nigger" to another person in anger, but I did once call a gay man a "faggot" when he was persistently harassing me and I was trying to find a way to hurt him back. It's never acceptable or appropriate, but perfection is something I have not been able to achieve. There wasn't an option for "yes, but it's wrong," so I passed.

[Glaug-Eldare]

99. Maybe I'm the only one?

Either I'm a remarkably shitty person, or I'm the only one willing to admit this particular fault on DU!

[Bandit]

33. I find myself more and more using Republican as the ultimate derogatory term.

When someone would cut me off in traffic I used to call them asshole under my breath. Lately though I have been substituting Republican, and I find it fits every single occasion...

[Agnosticsherbet]

35. The N-word, I've used when discussing the utter inappropriateness

Last edited Fri Mar 29, 2013, 05:39 PM - Edit history (1)

of uttering the N-word.

The word faggot, I've uttered allowed when reading a poem from "The Hobbit" where it is used to mean a "bundle of sticks" used for burning, and its related to the word "fascism" from Latin.

[LWolf]

36. Hate speech of any kind is never okay.

Words are powerful. I try to be conscious of how I use them.

The first priority of every moment for me: do no harm.

I can be pretty brutal when angry, but I don't hate, and don't use hate speech. I generally don't talk at all, face to face, when I'm angry. I'm blunt enough when I'm not. I do my best to process that anger before I talk about it.

[loyalsister]

107. I have no impulse to use those words

I do use plenty of available profanity when I get angry. There are a lot of creative uses of those word which was also available to Penn.

[Blue_Tires]

37. I did frequently in my younger and dumber high school days

Grown up since then...

[MrScorpio]

40. Nope, I don't

"Asshole" is perfectly suitable

[hobbit709]

41. I usually call someone a fucking asshole when I get pissed off.

[99Forever]

42. Your premise is false.

But I guess when you are so morally perfect so as to have never have said something you regretted in the heat of the moment, you can do that.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

43. LOL. just saying my premise is false doesnt make it so.

[99Forever]

45. Perhaps not, however...

... pretending to know someone else's "intention" would seem to call for some actual hard evidence to back it up beyond your "feelings." But if all you have is unfounded assumptions, then that says everything that is needed to know.

Have a nice day.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

48. we express out intentions through behavior. its the only way to

when you behave in a racist way, esp one that is easily recognizable, your displaying racist intent

[99Forever]

55. What?

Allegations with zero specifics? Good grief, that's lame.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

57. i think you have a reading comprehension problem. nt

[99Forever]

65. A personal insult now?

I wish I could say I didn't expect that. I know what I don't expect, is honest discussion or any evidence of your false premise.

Good bye, I don't have any interest in further conversation with you.

[Skittles]

122. SHE WON THAT ONE

AND YOU KNOW IT

[LanternWaste]

93. Those things we say in the heat of the moment aptly illustrate both who we are

Those things we say in the heat of the moment aptly illustrate both who we are, and the content of our character.

It does not take moral perfection to deny yourself the utterance of particular words as you believe... merely tolerance and discipline.

However, I do realize that many people deny the first to rationalize the second.

[Skittles]

103. WTF

I'm a hothead and often explode with profanity-laden tirades but not once have I EVER used a racist or homophobic term when I was hollering - only racists and homophobes do that

[99Forever]

108. If only everyone was just like you!

[Skittles]

115. non-racists and non-homophobes ARE like me

!!!!!!

[99Forever]

120. You truly are awesome!

Given your extensive experience with successfully dealing having paparazzi invade your privacy for so many years, perhaps you should consider teaching others how to achieve your very superior moral disciplined methods.

[Skittles]

121. MOST stalked people do not resort to RACISM AND HOMOPHOBIA!!!!

because MOST OF THEM are not racists and homophobes!!

[99Forever]

123. Really?

You have talked to everyone that has been stalked and gotten a consensus from them? You of course can provide the documentation to back your claim, correct?

[Skittles]

125. yeah, OK

[99Forever]

126. Oh noes!

Not the dreaded laughing emoticon!


Have you no mercy?

[orleans]

143. what are you talking about? false premise?

she asked a question.

[99Forever]

147. This is the premise:

"It was implied in the the thread about Sean Penn's son that the paparazzi had it coming."

Prove it.

[Mr Dixon]

44. meh!

I try not to let people get my angry enough for me to call them names, however my chosen word would be stupid –azz or you dumb bit@h. Not very proud of that but meh! shit happens.

[Tikki]

46. Never....

Tikki

[Myrina]

47. When I'm really angry I just use G'damned A-hole. It's non specific.

n/t

[Sheepshank]

50. I'm a hot head and when I get angry, I will speak out.

But it has never ever occured to me to use either of those terms.

I prefered the non denominational, non gender speficic, all around inclusive, "Fucking ass wipe" of "Fuckwit". But that's just me.

[Politicub]

51. What?! People who use either word when angry have racism and homophobia in their heart

That's the way they feel inside. If they become so angry that their hate causes them to spew bigoted slurs, they are responsible for their behavior.

Chalking racist behavior up to feeling incensed sounds like someone saying, "the devil made me do it."

[La Lioness Priyanka]

59. that's exactly what i think

[Sissyk]

52. Those two words are never

used by accident, even in a fit of anger.

They are either in your vocabulary or they are not.

[kestrel91316]

54. I will confess to having muttered the N word under my

breath a few times, always in response to some news report or another about truly egregious criminal behavior involving violent street gangs. I would NEVER use it in conversation or direct it toward someone. And f---t isn't even in my vocabulary.

And in fairness, I do mutter equally bad words about such behavior on the news involving other races.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

58. are you black?

[Number23]

134. Really?

I will confess to having muttered the N word under my breath a few times, always in response to some news report or another about truly egregious criminal behavior involving violent street gangs.

Do you bust out with "cracker," "snowflake" or any of the slew of pejoratives towards whites when you see news items on serial killers, mass murderers, or meth dealers?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

135. that was almost exactly what i was going to write (i was going to

say when you see some white guy shoot up little kids in a school, what do you say under your breath to him?)

[Number23]

141. Exactly. I was hoping the poster would have an answer by now, but I guess not.

[samplegirl]

56. Sorry I did not read it right...........

my mistake!

[StrongBad]

60. A genuine question regarding the use of "Faggot"

What are your thoughts on this Louis CK bit?

If one's meaning and usage of "faggot" is not related to or intended to denigrate homosexuality, is it wrong to use the word?

Since language changes and evolves over time, is it wrong to assume the use of the word is an affront to homosexuality?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

62. yes, it's still wrong because the underlying assumption is still homophobic

He may personally as a child not have known that gay=faggot but the words were created in that spirit, and you cannot separate it out at will.

there is no way to separate faggot from gay men no matter how many mental contortions louis ck makes

annoying whiney men are faggots to him and underlying this is still bigotry towards gays.

It's not ok. When an overwhelming part of an oppressed community tells you that it's not ok, it's not ok.

[StrongBad]

76. Fair points

As a follow up, do you feel it's wrong for him to use it within the context of artistic expression in his performances too, or just in "real life"?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

77. my answer to that is i am not sure. really. i am not sure how i feel about it.

the using it as a insult part bothers me, this is know. the using it in art i am conflicted about

[LiberalFighter]

61. I still think it and then realize that it is wrong

Wishing there was something else I could use

[La Lioness Priyanka]

64. there are thousands of insults that are not race based or bigotry based

but i think if you acknowledge its wrong, then you know it's wrong. it the excuses to make something wrong and turning it into something acceptable that really annoys me

[RC]

63. DU is the only place i hear/see those words used.

Maybe it is because I don't hang out in seedy bars or something. I'm thinking maybe some people need to get some new friends if they are hanging with bigots.

[LittleBlue]

66. I use the N-word

but only when muttering lyrics to old rap songs from the 90s, never around people.

[olddots]

67. I have a hard time sayin them in my head .

[Beacool]

68. Nope, I never even think them in my head.

I despise them as much as I despise the "C" word used against women.

[Cleita]

69. No. I prefer calling them assholes.

It's non specific and satisfyingly offensive even though it's insulting to rectums everywhere.

[fizzgig]

70. there were five people who said it was ok to use those words in limited circumstances

but no explanation from any of them.

those words are never acceptable for me to use.

[Apophis]

71. Hell no.

[Lizzie Poppet]

72. Not okay.

I can't imagine a circumstance in which I'd find it acceptable to use either of these terms in anger. Hell, I'd have trouble using them in jest, even with very good and dear gay and black friends who I know without question wouldn't misunderstand the humor. It just wouldn't feel right. I have an, um..."colorful" vocabulary. If I need to insult someone, I can do it without resorting to a broad slur.

[RobinA]

73. I Say Neither

but I checked that I didn't want to check available options. I personally think those words should be used early and often. Those words are given too much power and using them will render them meaningless.

[Kalidurga]

132. Back in the days of lynching and gay bashing (actual bashing not insults)

The terms were used quite frequently by the people that murdered black people and gay people. I don't think those words actually lost any power back in those days when they were used as a matter of course.

[Bluenorthwest]

74. The thing is this: it is incredibly common to hear vicious, casual homophobia from actual adult

sports celebrities that it is really hard to keep count. And I never ever see posts calling out their parents. Ever.
"“I don’t do the gay guys man, I don’t do that. Nah, we ain’t got no gay people on the team. They gotta get up outta here if they do. Can’t be with that sweet stuff. Nah, can’t be in the locker room,” Culliver said.
He was not angry, not stalked, he just said this stuff all chuckles and grins. And where were the DU posts blaming his Dad?

"In a case of atrocious timing, Knicks superstar Amar’e Stoudemire chose Gay Pride weekend to hurl a homophobic slur at a fan on Twitter.

Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/amar-stoudemire-tweet-nasty-slur-gay-pride-weekend-article-1.1101663#ixzz2OwsGilLs

A grown up superstar casually using one of the words cited in the OP. Again, his parents were not called out for it. He kept his job as they all do. The fans cheer for them, no liberal sports fans object or boycott, nope.

So I do not get the double standard. Seems homophobic slurs are allowed for some adult millionaire celebrities without much reaction and that no one ever calls their parents out for raising bigoted, foul, casually vulgar pieces of shit. I could list them all day long. There has never been an organized objection to the stream of faggot shouting jocks. We read lots of material here claiming sports are just wonderful, an art form even. But no one says 'I get sick of the Superstar Millionaire Bigots and the Parents who raised them'. Nope, they laugh it off and buy season tickets.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

75. which is why i think the faggot part of that encounter didnt shock me as much as the use

of the n-word.

I really just dont see how anyone can see that as acceptable under any circumstances

[Bluenorthwest]

79. People sure as fuck think the one is acceptable, and once you accept the one, the rest will follow.

And I do not understand why one is accepted at all. Why don't people call out the parents of the homophobic hate speaking Superstars of Sports?
No one hires, praises, nor defends Hopper Penn. The same can not be said of the Bigots of Sports, who get raises when they say faggot.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

80. there was a lot of defense of hopper on that thread because apparently the paparazzi deserved it

anyway, i was shocked that he said these things when knowing he was being recorded and i am pretty shocked that people defended it

[aristocles]

78. There's never an excuse for bad manners n/t

[edbermac]

81. Never used N word but iffy on F word.

Am a big fan of late comic George Carlin. On one of his albums he talked about growing up using fag more of an expression of a guy being a sissy as opposed to using it as a homophobic slur. I would refer to Limbaugh or Beck that way but not as a description of their sexual preferences. Just that they are cowards hiding behind a microphone.

I usually use asshole as a slur nowadays. Fits everyone regardless of race, creed or sexuality.

[FreeState]

112. Sissy as a basis for f*ggot is still homophobic

As a gay man that grew up in the 80s let me assure you "sissy" was used as a homophobic insult and still is. Its used to show that men are really women or acting like them, not only is it homophobic its sexist.

[edbermac]

116. True, good point.

[arely staircase]

140. i think some of this is regional

I've been called a faggot but never a sissy. I have never thought of them as synonyms. Alexander the Great was not a sissy but Rush Limbaugh. I think of sissy as cowardly, not necessarily effeminate.

[Little Star]

148. Yep. Those type words hit two birds with one stone, gays & women. Many hate us both.

[cbdo2007]

82. I only use the N word when quoting Chris Rock.

[backscatter712]

83. My nasty-knob goes to 11!

And I can express my heartfelt fuck-yous without using racial or anti-gay slurs.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

85. me too. i am fine with insults just not bigotry

[just1voice]

84. How about the DU posters whom "hate old white guys"?

Let's discuss their usage of hate speech, weeeeeeeeeee!

[La Lioness Priyanka]

86. dude, you can pretend as much as you want that we live in ahistoric acontextual world

where hating men=hating women, hating blacks =hating white and hating straights =hating gays, but those of who live in a historic & contextual world see the difference.

[LanternWaste]

96. Which specific word is hateful, "old", "white" or "guys"?

Which specific word is hateful, "old", "white" or "guys"?

As I've never written anyone up for any of those words being used at work, but I have in fact, fired a person for saying "faggot".

As I obviously have a difficult time realizing the vulgarity of any of the particular words you've chosen, you could then, elucidate us as to malicious content expressed within each word, yes?

Or (and I find this more likely...) is it necessary for your phrase to first be qualified with the word "hate" (as you did) to make the implication more clear... that same qualification which is most certainly not needed in either "nigger" or "faggot" to clearly imply that same hatred?

[aint_no_life_nowhere]

87. I've never used either word in my life and I was born in 1949

I used to get angry at times, especially while driving and shout obscenities at drivers who cut me off. But that was when I was young and had hot-tempered moments. But I've never used these words, following the lead of both my parents growing up. Nowadays I've become pretty mild mannered and almost never get angry like I used to.

[av8rdave]

88. There have been times, when really provoked, where I have likely uttered something vile, but...

Those words just don't come to mind.

They are nothing but proof of bigotry.

[dawg]

90. That is never okay.

Plus, it's dumb.

[bluedigger]

92. I can't say I never have, but it's been decades.

I grew up.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

94. that's fair

[get the red out]

95. No, I prefer "dumbass"

It's all purpose and generic.

[David Zephyr]

98. I get angry when I hear someone use those horrible, hurtful words.

.

[Squinch]

102. Nope, never. I don't shoot them either.

[arely staircase]

105. the n word offends me

[quinnox]

106. No, but I do curse them using ancient and strange

sorcerous rituals, involving the dark arts and pentagrams and other weird artifacts.

[tularetom]

109. I seldom get really angry

and when I do it's usually at my wife and in 50 years of marriage I have never used either of those words.

[Lil Missy]

110. No, and that's never even crossed my mind. n/t

[La Lioness Priyanka]

111. thats part of my point. without underlying bias, why would these words cross your mind

when you are angry. it makes no sense to me

[Glaug-Eldare]

113. I'm curious what your conclusion is about people like me.

I'll admit without hesitation that I'm a prejudiced person. From time to time, I have prejudiced thoughts about ethnic or religious minorities, homosexuals, people with different appearances or positions, etc. I have spoken extremely hateful slurs to myself when my clarity of mind was impaired, usually by anger. However, I recognize that these emotions and prejudices are false and hurtful, and I strive to never give them voice.

But I still have them, and I have expressed them under stress. I know myself well enough to predict that, at some point in the future, I will be angry enough to do it again.

Am I a bad person?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

118. what does bad mean? are you generally bad? how should i know?

i can say that anger makes it more likely that we use mental shortcuts (like stereotypes) however doesn't create the prejudice. you admit yourself that you are a prejudiced person, hence when you are angry, you can monitor this prejudice less well and it surfaces.

this is not my personal opinion by the way, it's supported by research

so i dont know if you are bad, i do know as i was told by you that you are prejudiced.

[Matariki]

114. You forgot the "NO! HELL NO!" selection.

[Courtesy Flush]

119. Never. Not even in private.

These are not words I would whisper. Nor think to myself. I'm from the deep south, and I have used those words too much in my youth. I wish I could say I've eliminated all bigotry from my heart, but I cannot. I have made a sincere effort, though, and that includes never belittling people with hate words.

[etherealtruth]

124. I have a filthy mouth ....

I frequently drop the F-bomb and other assorted expletives ... i can honestly say those are words I do NOT ever use ... I also do not use words that are racial, ethnic or religious slurs

[wyldwolf]

128. I just say 'dumbass.'

[Iggo]

129. I do not.

Never used the first one.

Grew up using the second one and it took a lot of work to get past it.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

131. yeah, i get the thing about f-word which is why when he said it

i wasn't horrified. but i was literally horrified at the N-word. like really, he didnt know that wasn't ok to say? seriously.

[Warpy]

130. I don't use those words because they're low class, tacky words

but that's just me and I might mumble them into my pureed peas at the old folks' home once I lose the marbles I have left.

So I never say "never." Or try not to, along with hard fighting racist or sexual slurs.

I don't make the rules for anybody else.

[4 t 4]

133. I grew up in Oak Park Illinois (very liberal,jewish,polish,irish,hispanic,asian ect...)

and I was never subject to those kinds of words/ never!! I also was told as a kid " don't you dare ever make fun of anyone, anyone no matter what". I don't think those words have ever been part of my thinking, really ever- kid, teenager, really never. Very thankful for that!!

[Warpy]

137. My later childhood was spent in Dixie.

'Nuff said, really. If you weren't a WASP, preferably a Southern Baptist WASP, you heard pejoratives a lot.

I wasn't a WASP.

[Jamastiene]

138. When words like those are used in anger/as a weapon, it IS the very definition of a slur.

If you are pissed off because a person did a specific thing, tell them why you are pissed off and make sure you say why. Calling a person degrading, offensive names like that says more about the person using the slurs. It makes one wonder who is really the asshole.

[arely staircase]

139. "They're only words. It's the context that counts. It's the intention behind the words that makes

them good or bad. The words are completely neutral. The words are innocent. I get tired of people talking about bad words and bad language. Bullshit! It's the context that makes them good or bad. The context. That makes them good or bad. For instance, you take the word "Nigger." There is absolutely nothing wrong with the word "nigger" in and of itself. It’s the racist asshole who’s using it that you ought to be concerned about. We don’t mind when Richard Pryor or Eddie Murphy say it. Why? Because we know they’re not racist. They’re niggers! Context. Context. We don’t mind their context because we know they’re Black. Hey, I know I'm whitey, the blue-eyed devil, paddy, o-fay, gray boy, honkey motherfucker myself. Don't bother my ass. They're only words. You can't be afraid of words that speak the truth, even if it's an unpleasant truth, like the fact that there's a bigot and a racist in every living room on every street corner in this country. "

George Carlin RIP

[Mira]

142. That never occurs to me

and I'm quite serious

[La Lioness Priyanka]

150. agreed.

[DiverDave]

144. It is NEVER "O.K" to use those words

NEVER

[Prism]

145. The sign of true rage

MF'er comes flying out of my mouth. Racial/gender/orientation slurs, not so much. MF'er captures my feelings quite nicely.

[PotatoChip]

146. No, never.

I can't think of any context in which using these words would be useful... Except in the OP, in which LLP had to for the sake of this particular discussion.

[Little Star]

149. No, never, along with Bi*ch, Wh**e, Sl*t, etc. n/t

[brewens]

151. Their was a day when I use the F-word as applied to gay men but I don't

think I ever actually called a gay man that. I know better now. Usually it was directed at an asshole I wanted to start something with, that being likely to get the proper response.

I don't ever do it, but I would say using the N-word in the context I think of, would be appropriate. IMO, there are more white N-word's than there have ever been black ones. It's more of a state of mind or something you allow yourself to be. Since people wouldn't usually get that, I don't use it.

[Vogon_Glory]

152. When I Swear At People, I'm Likely To Say Something Else

When I really get steamed at someone (In the privacy of my car or home), I tend to call the males (****)-suckers. I can't help but notice the irony. Since I'm a guy and (****) sucking is the sort of behavior I'd like to see encouraged and remain widespread, I can't help but acknowledge the contradictions.

[Rex]

153. No I say FUCK!

REAL LOUD! I only do this when I stub my toe or hit a digit with a hammer. When I get really mad, I get quiet.