On growing older:

[leftyladyfrommo]

I had the biggest shock a couple of days ago.

I'm 65 and still really healthy. I don't take anything for anything except acid reflux.

And I feel about 45 inside. And I guess I still see myself that way,too.

A friend of mine posted a picture of me on one of the boards I frequent. What a shock. I looked old in that picture. It was a bad picture from a weird angle. But still. I just don't feel old but when I look in the mirror there is this kind of old face looking back at me.

The other thing that is so odd is look back which I think older people tend to do. Where did the time go. It was gone in a flash. And when I think about the last thirty years its like no time has passed at all. It was just a flash in the pan.

It's kind of fun to play around with this stuff. But it is weird how we perceive the passage of time.

[pscot]

1. Don't look back

Something might be gaining on you.

[BlueToTheBone]

3. Yes, Death.

Mortality is shocking to say the least.

[liberalmike27]

47. My Saying is

You always see your age in your old friends.

That said, aging gracefully involves giving up some things you used to do. But then, it's up to any individual whether they want to age gracefully or not. It might be painful if you don't.

[BlueToTheBone]

50. Yes, because ultimately, we give up everything

including our old friend, our bodies.

[valerief]

27. I look back. Reckless tailgaters are always there. nt

[yesphan]

2. Reminds me of the saying

Do not regret getting older. It's a privilege denied to many.

[leftyladyfrommo]

108. And here's my thought for the morning.

Rage, rage against the dying of the light. (Dylan Thomas)

So far my light is still strong. My determination is still strong. I love the animals that I work with every day.

Have a great morning everyone! Go do something outrageous!

[Wounded Bear]

4. Time flies like an arrow....

Fruit flies like a banana.

[RC]

5. The disparity gets worse as you get older.

Been there, still doing that.

[Scuba]

6. This thread is useless without pictures.

[Voice for Peace]

20. you're right

[Neoma]

7. Good book:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0062225200

I think it's very important to not go, "well I can't do this because I'm not young." Can't dance in the street? Why the hell not? Know what I mean?

Also to keep in mind, parts of your body is younger than other parts of your body. You might have the brain of a 45 year old and the skin of a 65 year old. Or the hips of a 85 year old, and wrists of a 26 year old.

Time is a funny thing. I think the way to stretch it out is to stop watching television.

[monmouth3]

8. And get a good-looking young stud to ..... take you out or something...

[Neoma]

13. ...I'm married.

[MuseRider]

31. Oh yeah

like THAT will help anything? WTF is right.

[liberalmike27]

49. You Know a Guys Solution to Anything?

"You just need to get some." (ha) I know liberal women just love hearing that one. Or probably conservative ones too.

Personally being out of that game is one of what I consider the benefits of old age.

[leftyladyfrommo]

89. Me, too.

I haven't been sorry to see all that stuff go away.

Relationships can really drag you down - especially if you are like me. I always had the worst taste in men. Now I don't have any taste for men at all.

[raccoon]

111. I second that. I like men, but haven't been in a relationship for a long time.

I don't have the greatest taste in men either.

[90-percent]

9. I'm 59 and wondering what the hell happened

I just hope my past doesn't continue to dictate my future. All my friends looked about the same for thirty years, now we're all turning into old people.

I have to refind the drive that got me through college and off on a good career 37 years ago. I am way off my game and my wife has a serious illness. It can suck getting old, but it doesn't have to. I'm doing it wrong.

-jim

[MuseRider]

11. Please share if you find that way.

I will share if I do. It is so odd when it all of a sudden hits you that you are getting REALLY old, not just getting old but really getting to the latter years. I too am doing something wrong, it sucks for sure. I KNOW it can be done the right way but I guess we each just need to find what that is for ourselves. I don't want to be one of those 65 year old 120 year olds, know what I mean?

[MuseRider]

10. Getting ready to turn 60 in December.

I have never been freaked out by my age in years but my body is beginning to freak me out quite often. Too many changes, things I have fought for years are winning now and I look in the mirror and expect to see my 17 year old face (because I really am still that 17 year old with a little more sense) and the face that looks back at me reflects the years but it is not a pleasant reflection. I wish I could learn to grow old gracefully when it comes to my body image. I have apparently been so suckered by advertising. I accept who I am and how old I am and I am really not at all upset about any of that but damn, that face and body is not the one my mind easily accepts. I want to really and truly own those wrinkles and I do love the tiny bit of grey I have but I can not, no matter how hard I try, find a comfortable way to live in this skin. Maybe that will come with some more time.

What a life, huh? It is so long but gone by in a flash.

[calimary]

62. A step ahead of both of you. I turned 60 a few months ago.

I never looked my age before. Until lately. Mercifully, my skin's been great throughout, with very few wrinkles that are easy to spot.

But since I turned 60, all of a sudden - who the hell is that looking back at me in the mirror? Fuck!!! What's with that neck????????? (I believe the late great Nora Ephron wrote a whole book on that kind of thing...)

I also have just recently lost about 40 pounds. That plump neck that was a diagonal line from the tip of my chin down to the notch in my neck has now shriveled. I now have a discernible jaw line once again, but shit!!! There's this saying among women (certainly fits men, too, of course) that as you age you have to choose between your face and your ass. Well, thereya go. My face is not winning anymore. Btw - my husband and I are on the same diet, and it seems he's had to choose between his gut and his ass - Holy Cow, the deflation!!!

I remember during the reagan years, Nancy complained about her much-snickered-about fat ankles. She also said she exercised as much as she could but it didn't seem to make much difference anymore. And she was in her 60s at that time. Hated her husband but as far as that aspect, I did feel for her!

On the other hand, I finally gave up on my hair. It's been wanting to turn white since I was in college. For a long time I plucked out the offending hairs but soon it became a race I couldn't win anymore. So I started having it colored - a little lighter with highlights overall, sort of a mask-and-distract strategy. But I wouldn't be able to make time for regular hair appointments - which, with what I needed, quickly became way too expensive both in dollars and time squandered. Three or four hours at a shot! I have thick, heavy hair so it always takes me longer. I'd go so long between appointments that I'd start looking like an interstate highway with the gray roots rushing in. Finally gave up. My hair's gone all white. It's been fun! I took a photo with two longtime friends who are Latino and very dark-skinned. They're both shorter than I am. It looked like they were two normal people standing on either side of the abominable snowman!

The only advantage: unlike with my face - I absolutely LOVE my hair! Shoulda done that 30 years ago!!! Maybe my answer will be - growing out the bangs all the way and just hiding under it all the time! I'll look like a bleached-out Cousin It.

Btw - be sure you're taking your calcium/magnesium and glucosamine/condroitin supplements!

Aging sure isn't for the faint of heart.

[MuseRider]

64. :-)

I would LOVE for my hair to go all the way grey. It is so fine that it looks often like I might be going bald if it is caught in the right light but I am not, it is just lots of really fine hair. BUT the grey hair coming in is beautiful! Not my normal mousy brown that I had loads of fun coloring over the years but it is shiney, even sparkly silver and much stronger and thicker than my usual hair. It just will not come in! Grrrrr.

The neck. If there was ever anything I wanted done it is that wobbly thing that is showing up on my neck. I don't care if my eyelids droop so much I have to tape them up to see but that turkey neck is making me really upset. I somehow doubt that in the real scheme of life I really care enough to do anything about it but you never know. If anything goes it will be that.

LOL bleached out Cousin It. Love it and why not, you have earned it right?

We have lived in interesting times.

[calimary]

71. I think it was on the "M*A*S*H" TV show that one of the characters was talking about a woman with

a wrinkly neck. Something like - "she's got such a crepe-y neck she has to hide during Thanksgiving!"

Btw - I actually enjoyed the white hairs that went "SPROINNNGGGG!" from my scalp while the rest of the hair was still dark brown. They caught the light really nicely - and sometimes it looked like I had strands of silver in my hair - as though I'd spent a lot of time in the ol' salon. Too cheap to do that back then, though.

[eridani]

68. If my hair went to a nice relatively uniform silvery white, that would be fine

Unfortunately, light brown hair with some grey just looks like dirty brown hair, so I'll be sticking with Clairol Medium Golden Brown for a while yet. I'm lucking out with my face--turns out there is a flip side advantage to enduring an adolescence as a one-woman oil factory. Much less oil after menopause, but enough to keep things comparatively wrinkle-free.

[calimary]

70. Well, I live under my own personal white haystack!

I hope you stay that way, facially. My skin is just now starting to give up the ghost. But when it does, my skin and I both will be hiding under my hair!

[malaise]

83. Great post

Love my silver hair - see my mother's face in the mirror and am simply letting gravity take charge.
I exercise five days a week, have always been careful about what we eat and am enjoying the process. We either age or die so I'm making the most of this process. don't know if I'll have the same view when the old age pain begins.

[calimary]

104. Yeah, I know what you mean about "simply letting gravity take charge."

Every time I find myself looking in the bathroom mirror and pulling my checks back a little to tighten things up, INVARIABLY I'll see an older woman in the neighborhood, just a few minutes later, who's had too much work done. The skin is artificially tight over the old facial bones, sometimes it's shiny and too ruddy in spots. Sometimes you can see very tiny, fine broken capillaries in the cheeks. It just doesn't make sense. Maybe in the first few months after a facelift you're fine, but time marches on and your skin elasticity starts to give way again, and then you start looking like some strange bird-ish gargoyle. So, how ever much I was tempted, that temptation was short-lived. And hey, if I'm too busy and too cheap to stay on top of my spreading gray/white roots every six weeks like you're supposed to, how on earth would I ever keep up with something like that?

When I was a reporter, one of the things we covered every year, along with events like the Oscars and stuff, was the American Film Institute tribute to some leading Hollywood light, who was given a lifetime achievement award because he or she usually had a LOOOOONNNNG list of accomplishments spanning many years - to earn the right to be an honoree. The AFI tributes always brought out Old Hollywood. MAN we would see such eye-brow-raising raised eyebrows and other assorted eye lifts! And facelifts. And chin lifts. Male and female versions. And neck jobs and boob jobs, toupees and hair transplants. You name it. We always had fun with this one, in the press area along the red carpet which is where you covered the arrivals. Always made me think it just wasn't worth it to have to keep pouring all that money down a bottomless pit of surgical upkeep. 'Cause regardless whatever work you had done - then you have to maintain the damn thing so you don't start getting saggy again and you stay pert and perky-looking. Costs a bundle or three. And eventually it just doesn't work anymore. For example, I think Demi Moore has taken it as far as it'll go without just totally blowing it. Which is really a shame! She was simply glorious-looking when she was younger!!! On the other hand, I just saw Judy Colllins in a PBS clip, with her white hair pinned up in a bun. She's gotta be, I dunno, in her 60s or even maybe 70s (?) and she IS glorious-looking!!!

[malaise]

109. I'm not lifting a damn thing

We can use that money to travel, buy fresh fish or help some kids get an education.
Judy Collins must be in her 70s and yes she does look great.

LOL re the ladies with too many lifts - a lady I know saw me recently and asked why why I don't dye my hair since I would look younger. My simple response was - I love my silver hair and you don't look younger. She had no come back for that.

[calimary]

116. Neither am I! What's the point?

You get onto a downward slope as droopy as your jowls, and you just can't fight Mother Nature for long. No way to hold back those floodwaters! What's the point? Besides, I can think of tons of ways to use that money better and in much more long-term satisfying ways! Hell, I'd probably just channel it into my son's band.

[ananda]

12. I hear you!

I'll be 65 in October. I just got my Medicare card, waiting for the
next step for the Advantage part. My monthly premium goes down
$100 just as my rent has gone up some, so that's good. I can live
off my pension if I need to.

I agree about the time part. Sometimes my old memories feel like
yesterday.

Another positive is that I'm so happy and content with life now. I
think that's because menopause has been fairly easy, and the old
PMS was awful... meaning my emotions are on more of an even keel.

Well, it's also because I don't have to work unless I want to, so I
don't feel so much like a wage slave. Lol

The only negative is the physical part. I have occasional back trouble,
and I can't exercise as much as I want to. I also have cataracts, which
my eye doctor will have to keep an eye on.

Otherwise I am very healthy. My blood pressure read 112/75 last week,
and I don't take any meds at all except the occasional willow bark capsule.

Life is good at 65, at least so far!

[spanone]

14. i'm with ya...

[lins the liberal]

25. Advantage plans or supplements

I will also turn 65 very soon, and my husband turned 65 a few years back. So I've spent a great deal of time studying the government website regarding medicare, medicare supplements and Advantage plans.

Supplements you only have 6 months to take out a supplement plan after you turn 65. After that you can be turned down for pre-existing conditions. I thought Obama care might change this, but apparently not. Right now the Advantage plans are great, but most of the cuts to Medicare to help finance Obamacare are to be in the money the government pays insurance companies who offer Advantage plans. A few years ago I believe it was $800 a month being paid to the companies for each person. And it was costing the government more than traditional medicare. With big cuts to the Advantage plans, it is possible that the cost will increase dramatically while benefits will fall. So the safest thing is to go with a supplement even though they generally cost more. The better plans also cover more than the Advantage plans. Also the government website lays out the plans that companies are allowed to sell as supplements. So you know exactly what coverage you are getting. Where as the Advantage plans are all a bit different and it is impossible to tell exactly what they cover.

[MindPilot]

15. Trees seem to grow faster these days.

I rarely ride the bus, but I had to go downtown. I can never remember if the fare is $2.50 or $2.25, so I ask the driver "two-fifty or two-and-a-quarter?" She looks up and me and as if she were explaining a new concept to a four-year-old says "sir, it's a buck-ten for seniors."

[riverbendviewgal]

16. you made it to 65

Me too. My young 26 year old son and 54 husband did not get there, nor did many of my young friends. I thank each day I made it. I say this when I see myself in the mirror when I feel a little shocked to not see my long black hair but short silver hair with a face of wrinkles. I am fortunate.

[MissDeeds]

21. Lovely response

I am so sorry for the loss of your son and husband. I'm sure they would be proud of your resolve.

[calimary]

63. Jonathan Winters once said - "sure beats the ol' dirt nap!"

I interviewed him once, when I was still working. That quip just stuck like glue - I thought it was the greatest thing! And as I age, it has new meaning for me every day. We had a neighbor across the street who had her own version of it - "any problem on this side of the dirt can be fixed."

[DebJ]

114. LOL thanks what a fantastic quote! n/t

[Thor_MN]

17. As one gets older, a year becomes an increasingly small percentage of total life experience

A year when you are a child is forever compared to what went before. When you are older, the weather warms up and then turns colder and a year is gone.

[raccoon]

112. Exactly. When you're 5, a year is 20% of your entire life.

When you're 60, a year is 1.7% of your entire life.

[The Wizard]

18. As we grow older

time goes by faster because it takes us longer to do everything.
Thus spaketh The Wizard.

[B2G]

19. I turned 50 this year, so I can relate

It helps to remind myself that Brad Pitt and Lisa Kudrow are 50 too. Lol.

What's working for me:

1) Drink 8 glasses of water a day. It's essential.
2) Don't be cheap with moisturizers. I love L'Oreal Youth Code. It works.
3) Take supplements. B complex, fish oil are a must.
4) Take a brisk 30 minute walk at least 4 times a week. Force yourself to get out. It makes a huge difference in how your body and mind feel.

There are obviously cosmetic proceedures if you have the inclination. The one that produces the most dramatic results is an upper eye lift if your lids are beginning to sag. I can't afford the 2K right now, but I'm saving up and it will be my 55th birthday present to myself!

[SalviaBlue]

32. Good suggestions, I do all of those things.

I will say, at 50 I was thinking "This is not so bad, I'm holding up pretty good."

At 57, the age is showing much more and no amount of water, vitamins, walks or moisturizers is going to change that. On the other hand, a face lift.... that would be a nice luxury to have the choice to go that route.

[Skittles]

81. I live in a town full of gals with the money for cosmetic procedures

many of them look utterly ghastly, much worse than if they simply had some wrinkles

[leftyladyfrommo]

86. well, and something else.

I saw a group of older women who were all having lunch together. They all looked about the same age. But one woman obviously had had procedures done. She was botoxed to the max, as my friend said. And she looked completely out of place.

[Skittles]

88. I'll take a wrinkled smile over a frozen pillow face any f***ing day

those gals look RIDICULOUS

[leftyladyfrommo]

90. They certainly look stiff.

I don't want to make fun of them. People do all sorts of crazy things trying to stop that ole clock. Doesn't work.

You just have to flow with it and enjoy yourself - be confident in your own skin.

[Borchkins]

45. Happy to you!

I turned 50, too, a month ago. My husband is eight years younger, and my kids are 9 and 11. I don't have time to feel old, even though let my hair go gray in anticipation of turning 50 and I look old!
B

[MissDeeds]

22. I'm right there with you

I think I've held up pretty well until I see a picture of myself in a photo. It's humbling...and it hurts like hell. There are relatives I haven't seen in years, and I dread encountering them now. I used to be a size four and played tennis four or five times a week. I looked great; now I see my face sagging and my once svelte figure expanding. I want to avoid anyone who knew me in my "glory days". I know it's vain and shallow, but that's how I feel.

[leftyladyfrommo]

38. Aw. Fuck em!

And they have all aged just like you.

[MissDeeds]

39. Thanks

I needed that!

[magical thyme]

23. I'll turn 60 on mischief night...

I have a wonderful mirror in my bathroom that hides the wrinkles. I still look 50 or so in it, except the hair has lost its color in the last couple years. Then I go into the bathroom at work, and don't recognize myself.

But I feel much younger. I have been been blessed with mostly good health. My most serious health problems to date (knock wood) were actually back in my early 30s. I think I'm healthier now than I was back then, although I still need to replace 4 inches of fat with an inch of muscle on my waist. I'm determined to do it by my birthday, or bust! The most medicine I take is occasional tums (great for charlie horses too, btw) or aspirin or allergy pill if I can't sleep.

Last year, I started my young arabian mare under saddle, after a several year hiatus from riding. Getting back on her this year was tough...on what was to be our last ride before winter, she turned rodeo bronc and left me eating dirt and cussin'

But I did it and she's back under saddle! I'm dreaming of getting a 2nd horse for my birthday/Christmas. Dahli's done quite well since we lost our herd leader, Algiers, but horses are herd animals and a companion for her would be a good thing. I may get another arabian, but right now I have my eye on a draft pony that rides and drives. I'm thinking that way driving will be there for me if and when I start feeling too old to ride.

I've spent some time this summer looking back and working through old issues. Now I'm looking forward. I'm looking forward to retiring and spending all my time in my garden, training my horse(s), taking the dogs swimming, rescuing dogs, whatever. I'm looking forward to being able to have 1 part time job instead of 2 of them, and then not needing that either. As much as I can, while I can.

If I'm able to sell this place I can replace with a cottage with more land and less house plus maybe squeeze in another bit trip or two. I've been whitewater rafting through the grand canyon and through westwater canyon, and been to Mexico. Now I'm thinking maybe Iceland and/or Costa Rico on horseback.

Time will tell...

[ruffburr]

24. There was a Time-

When age was respected for the wisdom gained, Now once one passes 50 one is cast aside as so much trash, Screw wisdom one is too much risk and not of any value to society or a burden so hurry up and die, Welcome to the new values, At 59 i've seen enough and when my time comes it will be fine by me, The new world of crap can go on without me and kiss my ass.

[The Blue Flower]

26. I have the greatest role models imaginable

Just turned 64. I volunteer at the food bank alongside three 90 years olds who still move heavy crates around, go up and down ladders, and whose minds are sharp as tacks. The secret is that they were active when they were younger and never stopped. They read and keep up on what's going on in the world. They have a sense of purpose and feel that they're contributing to the community. I started volunteering there 12 years ago and can lift and bend better than I could when I started. Each time I'm there I get an amazing workout all over. And I look at the wrinkles and white or bald heads of my 90-year-old friends and see how beautiful they are. I've earned my wrinkles and am proud to be one of the tribe.

[MuseRider]

33. That is beautiful and great advice.

[tblue]

56. DING DING DING!!! We have a winner!

Best answer. Groom yourself the best you can and then go help somebody. Everyone ages, unless they die young, right?

[abelenkpe]

28. Still pictures

Still images are deceptive. How you move illustrates more about a person. If you still have a spring in your step, smile frequently and move with ease you will feel and appear younger.
I'm in my early 40s. In photos I can see every line every scar every bit of evidence of the passing years. But I don't feel any different than I did in my 20s. I'm still healthy (luckily) swimming, running, hiking and playing with my young kids as much as possible. Don't let a bad photo change your impression of yourself! 

Time does pass too quickly though. My baby turned nine years old today.  Guess he's not a baby anymore....

[Flatulo]

29. For me, having a child planted a stake in the ground

from which all subsequent events are measured. He's all grown up now, but I still reckon time from his birth. Lets see, when did I have my appendix out? Oh yeah, when Chris was 9 years old.

The last few years have been cruel to me. What used to be episodic back pain has become a crushing disability. I can't sit, stand or walk for more than 20 minutes or so, so I spend most of my life on my back. I was always very active, so this has been a major disappointment and readjustment.

I remain upbeat, though. I find enjoyment where I can - with family and friends, reading, playing online Scrabble, and a dozen other things one can do.

I'm also hopeful for a treatment to repair my flattened and torn discs. My pain doctor tells me that within a few years there will be a protein injection that restores the discs to most of their former thickness, helping to return the spine to its normal geometry.

[Nay]

59. I'm in a similar position. You have my sympathies. I'm 62, have been healthy all my

life, and then got broadsided at age 59 with diabetes and at age 60, Stage 1 breast cancer. I have the diabetes under great control; I had surgery and 16 days of radiation for the cancer and now seem cancer-free (you can't ever tell if that's really true; could come back). For a short time there, I felt like things were "getting back to normal" but now, bang, I've got something wrong with my knee, and will be seeing the doc next week. I can't even take my daily walks without aggravating that knee. Damn.

It beats being 6 feet under, but I understand how aging can depress a person.

[Flatulo]

66. Congrats on beating the cancer. There's a lot of diabetes in my family history, so I'm

very careful with my diet, especially since I'm so sedentary now. The only exercise that I can participate in is light swimming, and fortunately for me there's a local competition pool, so I try to get there every night.

I'd certainly like to live another 20 years, but not like this. Pain 24/7 sucks.

Good luck, and I hope you can keep the diabetes in check. That's another really shitty disease; it just chips away at you.

[Koios]

30. It happens ...

... seems being born is not without certain drawbacks.

For me, the trick is not overthinking it. It's just life. We're no different than other living organisms, except in addition to doing what we're supposed to do as prisoners in the system of reproducing and mutating, we evolved rational thought. Cool, except that suddenly we start thinking we have meaning, beyond simply perpetuating our species.

So one need not welcome death, nor fear it. It comes, and if we're lucky, it'll come about the time we tire of being alive. It's all good.

[spooky3]

34. Warning: Do not view yourself on your computer's camera

If you think you look bad in good camera photos, you are in for a shock on a webcam/computer camera.

Or maybe it's just me!

[shanti]

65. ain't that the truth!

one reason i avoid skype i thought i'd love being able to talk to family ftf in a phone call. in theory, it sounds great, but not in action!

[MuseRider]

35. This is a nice thread.

I am going to bookmark it because as time goes on many or most of us will have down times as we age. This thread has some very nice thoughts and philosophical ways of thinking this stage of life through (or not ).

Thanks for this. When life is hard, and lately it has been quite hard at times, this is a thread I will revisit to keep myself looking up rather than down.

[leftyladyfrommo]

97. It's just a given that life

is really sucky sometimes.

By the time you get our age everyone has been through hell and back. I can talk to my older friends about stuff that I never could have when I was younger. They know just what I'm talking about and what I'm feeling. They have all been there, too.

And that is a really nice thing.

[MuseRider]

103. It is indeed. :-)

[hfojvt]

36. are you old enough to remember Pong?

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023295291

[malthaussen]

42. Bah, I hated Pong.

And Space Invaders. I loved pinball. I remember when the arcade started getting in those video game-thingies thinking that they were going to ruin the world. And I was right!

-- Mal

[hfojvt]

44. everybody hated pong

it was like the ultimate combination of lame and cool.

My grandfather had an old-style pinball game, run with just springs and marbles. His grandchildren thought that was the coolest thing ever. I still think that games like that would sell.

[arely staircase]

105. I'm 45 and remember Pong well.

Last edited Thu Aug 8, 2013, 01:52 AM - Edit history (1)

[Laurian]

37. I turned 65 this year, and it just about did me in.

The anxiety and depression that I'd kept at bay all my life totally overwhelmed me. The gloom and doom was everywhere. I finally saw a doctor and with the help of modern pharmaceuticals, I am able to live in the here and now and am actually happy for the most part. My new philosophy: It Is What It Is.

Since I can't change it, I've made a conscious decision to enjoy the rest of my life.....however long that may be. I can choose whether to be a miserable old grump or not, so I choose to not be that.

[olddots]

40. i stopped looking in the mirror 30 years ago

fuck youth ,it's over rated and over hyped .

[leftyladyfrommo]

85. Really. I'm much happier now than I have ever been.

I am so thankful to have good health. My mother and I never got along. But she did give me the gift of a robust constitution. She lived to be 94. Her younger sister is now 96 and still lives by herself in an apartment.

[leftyladyfrommo]

41. I just think time is such a weird thing.

When I'm in the now time seems like a flat plane the stretches out in front of me forever.

When I try to get ahold of it the past passes into the future so fast that it's impossible to grasp that second that is "now."

And when I look back it was all just a flash, almost an illusion. Where on earth did 30 years go? When I was young the time forward just was endless. 30 years was just so far off in the future.

I do get a lot of glimpses into past things that I didn't realize I even remembered. Stuff just pops up in technicolor - scenes from 40 years ago or 30 years ago.

I really wish I could take what I know now and go back and try it all again. I would do a much better job of it than I did then. Some of my mistakes are embarrassing to even think about. Others are just funny.

It's just such an interesting concept.

[MuseRider]

61. I just got back into the house.

I went out and mucked out 4 horse stalls. It is a cool, cloudy day of 77 but post storms the humidity is 88% and it is a nasty soup out there. I can do it, like I used to do it. I do the same things but my body has not responded the same way, it seems to tend to fat now no matter what I do. Keeping that down is a full time job

Funny this thread interested me so much because these things have been on my mind a lot lately because I was so ill over the winter and have yet to fully recover.

Your description of time in this one post is exactly the way it seems. I guess life now is like looking at one of those funny geometrical pictures that seems to breathe if you look at it one way or change somehow. It is funny and interesting and we all gotta go there so it is a very interesting thread I would have probably saved if I was 30.

Thanks again, I was hoping for something that was not so politically contentious to be a part of today.

[raccoon]

113. That happened to me about in my mid 50's.

"I do get a lot of glimpses into past things that I didn't realize I even remembered. Stuff just pops up in technicolor - scenes from 40 years ago or 30 years ago."

I wonder if it happens to everybody?

[trekbiker]

43. the trick for me is

I dont look in mirrors. Sounds silly but if I catch a reflection by accident it puts me into a depression for an hour or two. And I was a good looking guy once upon a time, where did all that hair go? Only time I ever see myself in a mirror is after my morning shower and somehow my brain has tricked me into being ok with that. I've gotten real good at looking at photos off center when friends and relatives just have to show me the pictures they took of me, etc. But the damn DMV ambushed me last month when I opened the letter containing my new driving license with the photo updated from the one that was 20 years old... that was painful.. ahahaa

Looking back and time is compressed, where did it all go? Staying active and looking forward is much more enjoyable. I retire in a year at age 56 after a very rewarding career as an engineer. What will I do? Dont need to work, good health, good pension, tons of money saved more than I'll likely ever spend, no wife... complete freedom. Cant sit around, never have, dont even watch television. But I've had a plan for many years to start my second career as an artist when I retire from engineering. I had a lot of talent as a kid, have taken a few workshops over the years and the talent is still there. I figure the next 25-30 years I can maybe really accomplish this goal. If I end up on my death bed and never gave my art a serious try, that will have been a life half lived....

[leftyladyfrommo]

74. Hey! All Right.

Go for it.

I got forced out at about 57. I didn't do well sitting around. I tend to worry overmuch. So I just started my own pet sitting business.

I'm busy. I don't have to put up with anyone I don't want to. I don't have to contend with that
God awful corporate mentality where if you dare have a personality you are painted as a rogue employee. I never had the right personality to work in business but that is where I was stuck all my life.

Work at painting just like you would a job. Get training. Set up a place to work. Work every day. But take time out to do things that are fun, too.

[CrispyQ]

46. Life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer you get to the end, the faster it goes.

My dental hygienist shared that with me on my 40th birthday. That was 16 years ago, or rather, just a few spins of the roll.

I gained a lot of weight between 36-40 & didn't take it off until 2 years ago. I lost 50 pounds & look better than I have in years. That said, even though I'm svelte again, the skin is crepe papery, the face is sagging a bit, & the head is sprouting some wild white strands.

Mostly I look back with recognition & humility that I have lived one of the most privileged lives of all humans that have ever existed. It is boggling.

[DainBramaged]

48. We are privileged to grow old while many never achieve that status

[Egalitarian Thug]

51. Young people just don't understand that, on the inside, we're the same as we

were 20 or more years ago.
& R

[LibDemAlways]

55. Absolutely. I was on a sailing excursion while on vacation

recently and one of the 20 somethings commented loudly ,"I was so bummed when I saw all the old people getting on. Fuck that." No one on that vessel was over 60 and most were in their 40's.

[leftyladyfrommo]

76. I never felt that way about older people but

kids are just kids. They are just naturally very self centered. And I'm sure we seem so old to them. But they will figure it out one day, too.

[Skittles]

52. you want I should kick some bad angle photo ass, leftyladyfrommo?

F*** that - everyone takes bad pictures sometimes, and you are an awesome progressive gal!!! YOU GOT THAT OR DO I HAVE TO KICK YOUR ASS TOO???

[leftyladyfrommo]

77. It was such a bad picture.

I didn't have makeup on and I hadn't had any sleep the night before. And the angle was such that it cut off my chin so I looked chinless. And I was looking up at the camera so my eyes looked all weird.

Didn't think it was possible but it was worse than my driver's license.

I'll never go out without my makeup on again.

[Skittles]

79. what's with your friend posting that pic?

should we kick THEIR ass?

[leftyladyfrommo]

84. I know. What was she really thinking?

She was posting pictures of my new puppy and I just think she didn't really look at the picture. She was looking at the puppy.

He's very cute.

If your life is getting too boring get a puppy.

[LibDemAlways]

53. I turned 60 last year and avoid cameras at all costs.

I am the least photogenic person I know. I always look horrible in pictures - not so bad, though, when I look in the mirror. (It's a shame, too, because I have been on some pretty good vacations and there's no photographic evidence that I was there.) I feel about 30 by the way.

As for the passage of time, the speed as you get older is just ridiculous. My daughter recently turned twenty and it seems like yesterday she was an infant. I know exactly what you mean

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

54. "Who the hell is that old bat in the mirror?"

[thecrow]

99. This thread reminds me of a favorite song by Stan Rogers....

Last edited Wed Aug 7, 2013, 09:19 PM - Edit history (1)

"LIES"

At last the kids are gone now for the day.
She reaches for the coffee as the school bus pulls away.
Another day to tend the house and plan
For Friday at the Legion when she's dancing with her man.
Sure was a bitter winter but Friday will be fine,
And maybe last year's Easter dress will serve her one more time.
She'd pass for twenty-nine but for her eyes.
But winter lines are telling wicked lies.
All lies.
All those lines are telling wicked lies.
Lies all lies.
Too many lines there in that face;
Too many to erase or disguise;
They must be telling lies.
Is this the face that won for her the man
Whose amazed and clumsy fingers put that ring upon her hand?
No need to search that mirror for the years.
The menace in their message shouts across the blur of tears.
So this is Beauty's finish. Like Rodin's "Belle Heauimiere",
The pretty maiden trapped inside the ranch wife's toil and care.
Well, after seven kids, that's no surprise,
But why cannot her mirror tell her lies.
All lies.
All those lines are telling wicked lies.
Lies all lies.
Too many lines there in that face;
Too many to erase or disguise;
They must be telling lies.
Then she shakes off the bitter web she wove,
And turns to set the mirror, gently, face down by the stove.
She gathers up her apron in her hand,
Pours a cup of coffee, dripps Carnation from the can,
And thinks ahead to Friday, 'cause Friday will be fine!
She'll look up in that weathered face that loves her's, line for line,
To see that maiden shining in his eyes
And laugh at how her mirror tells her lies.
All lies.
All those lines are telling wicked lies.
Lies all lies.
Too many lines there in that face;
Too many to erase or disguise;
They must be telling lies

P.S. Stan Rogers died in a plane crash in the 80's... he was young, but he really understood the human soul. JHis music goes on.

[The2ndWheel]

57. Worst inventions?

Clocks and calendars.

Hearing the ticking of time pass by. Or, more recently, the relentlessly silent forward motion of digital clocks.

At least with the circular clocks, there's a sense of a sort of balance. What goes around, comes around. The circle of life. With clocks on a phone or a screen, it's just the next number. All the time.

Give me a world without clocks or calendars and I'll be alright.

[WCLinolVir]

58. I agree with everyone who said to keep moving.

It's never too late to lift some weights either. It helps maintain bone density which is so important. I have 6 bad discs and I just work through the pain. I know that once you give up your mobility, it's all down hill from there. I do use aids when walking a long distance if need be, and there is no shame in that. Your body will respond much differently to injuries when you have healthy supportive muscle memory.

[Javaman]

60. I just hit the half century mile stone...

where, indeed, does the time go?

Just last week I was slam dancing to The Ramones and couple of days ago I was working on a commercial as a cinematographer.

And now, I'm not. How did that happen?

I think of the line from that Talking Heads song, "How did I get here?"

It's a weird concept to think that, statistically speaking, I have lived longer now then I have time remaining on the earth. Yet, at points I wonder about what I have actually accomplished? I have done a lot of things, traveled to a lot of places, met interesting people, dined on amazing food and yet, what's it all mean?

It's the journey, so I am told and the journey only ends when you give up. There is still so much yet to do and experience that I feel that I won't have enough time. Isn't that the mortal rub of it all.

Have we loved enough? Have we shared enough? Have we smiled enough? But the bigger question is: what is enough?

My personal belief is that this is it, we only get one shot and we are through. Yet, in the deep recesses of my mind, I enjoy the what if of; that our mortal coil is nothing but a holding spot for a better us on the other side. As a caterpillar turns into a butterfly, we are to be transformed into something different. Something indescribable to us. Matter can neither be created or destroyed, so what becomes of the electrical impulse that we all have within us?

I'd like to ponder that all of this would eventually mean something, that there is a gigantic depository at the end of the universe for the accumulated knowledge to be stored.

But alas, I breath, I love, I eat and I experience.

We are born alone and die alone but along the way, we push the ball forward for others to have a better life.

And here we are.

[leftyladyfrommo]

78. I really believe in reincarnation.

I'm just hoping I will be able to wiser next time around.

You should read this book called Dharma Road. Can't remember the author. It's so good.

[thecrow]

101. What a beautiful post, Javaman

Thank you so much!

[Warpy]

67. It's a little disheartening

to be walking through a department store and spot some old harridan with a face that scares little children, only to realize it's a mirror and that's my reflection.

I do my shopping online these days.

[leftyladyfrommo]

80. Oh. Go on out there.

It's not important how you look. The important thing is to enjoy your life. Live it. Enjoy all the little miracles going on out there.

The good think about old age is that it's very freeing. I think most of the time I'm pretty invisable to other people. Just another old lady walking along.

It makes me laugh.

[TBF]

69. I am in my late 40s

and diagnosed w/arthritis a few years ago. I married later and have young children so folks often think that I am younger. I don't feel older until I look at photos of my old high school friends with their grandchildren - then I wonder where the time has gone.

((Hugs))

[leftyladyfrommo]

82. I wonder where used up time goes?

Now what I seem to have left of the past are just these odd memory pools. I get caught in them every so often. Or the memories are just like wisps that float by.

All that past is really just gone. It doesn't exist anywhere and all that is left is memories of it.

You know what I remember? I remember things like the tall slippery slide we played on in the park. We had to use wax paper on it to make it slippery. I was maybe 4 at the time.

It's just these odd bits and pieces. Really, it's kind of amazing.

[KoKo]

72. My Mother-in-Law and her sister both in their Mid-80's

were visiting us years ago. I went to get something out of the hall closet and overheard one saying to the other: "You know Jen...I look at myself and I think...I look old...but, I don't feel any older inside that when I was in my 20's." Her sister said...I know ...I don't either, I always expect to see myself young when I look in the mirror and then I get the shock!" They both hooted in laughter.

They both traveled all over the world in the years after both husbands died, signed up for "Elder Hostels" all over the USA where they would stay in College Dorms in the Summer and take classes on interesting topics by Professors who were involved in the program. They went on a sailing cruise up the East Coast in their early 80's and loved a good meal with a couple of glasses of wine to top it off. (They were very lucky not to have any debilitating diseases or other circumstances that allowed them to keep going the way they did. Good Genes, I think since their own mother lived to be in 90's.)

They were lively and funny...but, as I've gotten older what they said about "feeling like they were 20 inside" has stayed with me. I still feel like I'm the same person I was...but, it's hard not to notice that one only looks 20 something...when they really ARE 20 Something. But, keeping "young at heart" is a goal I hope to have even if I make it to their great age. They both died in their mid-nineties. I miss them much. They were what I'd hope I can aspire to be.

[young_at_heart]

73. I take off my glasses when I look in the mirror

Soon I'll be 74 and just can't really process that! You are so right.....where did the time go? I still feel 'youngish', not the least bit elderly, but I guess I need to face reality and put on my glasses.

[RebelOne]

75. I am 74 and am amazed that I have made to this age.

I have outlived a lot of friends and family. I am a smoker and have been since I was 16, so that hasn't killed me yet. Cigarettes killed my mother and my father; she had lung cancer and he had emphysema. I only stopped smoking twice in my life and that was when I was pregnant because cigarettes made me sick just to look at one. But I started smoking right after the babies were born to lose the baby weight. Now if I could find a way to trick my body into thinking it was pregnant, I may live for another 20 years.

[SoCalDem]

87. At 64, I don't care a lot anymore..

I came to term with my looks a long time ago.. My husband thinks' I'm ok, and I don't really care what other people think about my looks.. Small children do not run away in fright, so I'm cool with it.

I dress for comfort, and wear a bra when I have to

I keep the A/C cranking...life is too short to be sweaty

In my dotage, I have come to believe what I always told my sons.."People are too involved with themselves to really care all that much about what YOU are wearing or how you look ".

[leftyladyfrommo]

91. Really. Other people don't even notice.

I do have to wear support all of the time. My boobs got kind of really saggy. And I never had kids.

I don't really like looking at my naked self much.

[SoCalDem]

92. Gravity is a beast

and naked is ...well ...scary

[leftyladyfrommo]

93. In my case its just kind of floppy.

Not really scary.

I wish I could lose about 10 pounds but am having no luck with that at all.

[SoCalDem]

94. scary when hubby still has a pic of my 19 yr old self in a bikini in his wallet

kind of sad..for both of us

[lumberjack_jeff]

117. Trust me in this, that's how he still sees you. n/t

[life long demo]

95. I really love this thread, it really helps to read from

someone else, what my brain keeps telling me. I'm 70, and I think I went thru a time warp and lost 20 or 30 years. How could I misplace all those years. In any case have not accepted the face that stares back at me from the mirror. That can't be me. My body realigned itself. Had a bout with cancer and conquered it. All my sisters and brothers are still with us, 6 of us ages from 78 down to 60. Three of us conquered cancer. I guess all in all, luck has been with us. Thank God.

[leftyladyfrommo]

96. Wow!

You and your family are doing great.

[LWolf]

98. I saw myself on a webcam today.

I was horrified.

I know what I look like in the mirror, and it's never as faded and saggy as that.

I think I'd rather just go through life not knowing what other people see. While I don't feel like it any more, on the inside, I still see the trim, fit, firm, tight, 30-something I once was.

[leftyladyfrommo]

107. It's all in your mind's eye.

When I am with my friends I don't see old people at all. I just see my friends. I love those faces.

[KansDem]

100. I turned 60 in January...

My wife of 25 years and I have decided to split up just as soon as our finances are in order (maybe never?). Anyway, I'm really looking forward to my next "chapter" -- alone

I'm planning on getting a small room, maybe a small apartment or even a house (depends on finances). And I'm looking forward to peace and solitude living the life of a loner.

Clean, comfy surroundings. And I'll be alone....





...alone





...alone





...alone





[font size="1"]ahhhhh [font size="2"]

[virgogal]

102. I'm old enough to have been your babysitter.

[adirondacker]

106. I think what's remarkable about this thread is that I would have never guessed Anyones age.

I'm at the half century mark, and i visualize from many of the posts that DUers make, is that they are fairly young and intelligent. It's rather amusing to find out actual ages. Keep up the kindred spirit!

[B Calm]

110. Some days I look as I feel, which

is most of the time very old, unless i smoke some pot!

[leftyladyfrommo]

121. Yes. Everybody just get stoned.

Just tell em to roll me up and smoke me when I'm gone. (Not my quote)

[DebJ]

115. Here are two funny stories about aging from my husband and my parents.

My husband, when he comes across friends and acquaintances he met decades ago, always ends up saying
Gee why do they all look so OLD? He has lost almost all of his hair, and what he has left including his beard
is quickly graying, but he doesn't think he shows age at all. Of course, inside, he doesn't feel it.

My parents, shortly after retiring, went into a shopping center in the middle of the week one day, and my
mother asked my father "My goodness, what are all these old people doing here?" Then she laughed and
said "Oh my goodness, WE are old people!"

If you stop putting on makeup in your 40s, then when you hit the late 50s and 60s, you don't miss it.

I hate the way I look now, at 57 almost 58. But I realized when my children and grandchildren and I were
looking at recently-taken pictures, that they just see me as a Grandma, and I look like a Grandma, and that
is just normal and an 'of course'. I LOVE being Grandma, so that makes me feel better. That, and I haven't
REALLY looked in the mirror in many years. Looking doesn't make things better.

[kentuck]

118. Mortality catches up with all of us...

If we hang around long enough.

My theory is that we go from really huge orbits when we are young, to really small orbits as we get older.We still orbit the same sun and everything else - we just do it much quicker. Time actually goes quicker as we get older.

[SiobhanClancy]

119. Reading this thread has been very helpful..

Many thanks to all who've posted on it I rarely post about anything,but this really resonates with me. I turned 60 last September and here it is almost September again and I'm still reeling from reaching that milestone! Turning 30,40,and 50 didn't phase me,but this one was an "OMG!" moment. I have so many regrets about things I wished I'd done(or didn't do!) My health is not great,due to previous thyroid cancer and disc problems etc. I have a job that is somewhat physically demanding and it scares me that I can't do it too much longer and then no one would hire me because of my age. The one positive thing is the knowledge...and perhaps a tiny bit of wisdom....that I've acquired over the years. I'm going to try to take that,and some of the insight I've gained from you here,and try to find a more positive outlook. Thanks again!

[leftyladyfrommo]

120. You might as well have a positive outlook.

Your attitude is one thing that you really can control.

Life is so much better and happier if you are optimistic. It's so much more fun and interesting.