"I have a nightmare!" Please come CAPTION Fox's Doug McKelway!!!

[skip fox]

Doug ("The only good dream ends with you having to change the sheets&quot McKelway is saying: "Yes, Greg, it was fifty years ago today when Dr. Martin Luther King gave his historic 'I Have a Dream' speech which helped usher in bills protecting minorities and promoting racial equality as well as initiating a culture of dependence and fatherless homes which has spread to Europe and now threatens modern civilization itself. . . . So you're right in claiming Dr. King's speech has had significant national and international implications. . . . It's truly heartening, Greg, to see the outpouring and love for him five decades later!"

[rurallib]

1. "Who am I you ask. I don't even know"

[skip fox]

2. A letter from my mother. Deepest regrets.

Aug. 25, 2013

Dear Democratic Underground:

My son, the CAPTIONer of the OP, admitted to having plagiarized the above CAPTION from real life. He has confessed to me that, in a period of extreme laziness, he merely streamlined and tweaked what Mr. McKelway actually said. The evidence against him can be seen in full at the following Fox site:

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2013/08/24/march-to-focus-on-continued-fight-for-civil-rights/

He humbly begs your forgiveness for this act of plagiarism, realizing it could impinge upon his retention at CAPTION College and that his plea (“Sometimes it’s impossible to satirize these freaks!!!”) cannot excuse his actions nor should it alleviate your distemper.

He has been severely punished by his father and herewith begs re-admission to CAPTIONing classes.

He will spend 200 hours in the following year painting and refurbishing our home as an act of contrition.

Shamefully but sincerely,

Ms. Fox

[GeorgeGist]

3. "I like to keep a low profile ...

but yes I am Hans Solo".

[rug]

4. "I put the less in clueless."

[skip fox]

5. "I thought I'd try to start a movement to change the name from Martin Luther King Day

DAY to Entitlement Day and for some reason the crowd got mad at me and called me a racist. . . . I can't figure it out."

[sakabatou]

6. "Mmmmmm blue raspberry is my favorite."