To grown men who sexually harrass teenagers:

[Quantess]

I got sexually harrassed a lot, for years and years. It was the worst when I was a teenager and in my 20s.
You want to know what it's like? IT'S FUCKING ANNOYING!!! And you can't really do much about it when it's drive by, passers-by on the street.

I have never been bullied, I have never been sexually assaulted, and that is probably because of this giant reserve of anger I have within myself, and I am NOT afraid. I have always DESPISED coward sexual harrassers who pick on the convenient targets.

Again, to those FUCKING COWARDLY CREEPS out there in cyberspace: YOU ARE GROSS!!! GO FUCK OFF!!!! I DESPISE ALL OF YOU DISGUSTING FUCKING ASSHOLES WHO SEXUALLY HARRASS TEENAGERS!


This anger is directed at a very small percentage of men who sexually harrass teenagers. I wish the "nice guys" would listen to me and not tell me I'm lying.

[mike_c]

1. I understand your anger and frustration...

...but why broadcast it here? Has someone been harassing teenage girls on DU? Or is this about some recent event in the news that I haven't heard about yet?

[Quantess]

2. Regarding my latest hidden post.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1114&pid=10037

[Comrade Grumpy]

5. You were a juror on your own alerted post? How did that happen?

Or am I misunderstanding something?

[Nye Bevan]

9. Nope. Someone alerted on Doctor_J's OP.

Quantess was Juror #5 and voted to hide, but the jury went 3-3 and so Doctor_J's post stayed. But then Quantess posted this jury result as reply #13 in Doctor_J's thread, and a different jury (not including Quantess) voted 4-2 to hide, based upon Quantess's comment as a juror.

This stuff can be a bit hard to follow, sometimes.

[BuelahWitch]

13. Thanks, you described it better than I did

[mike_c]

29. ah-- thanks....

I had no idea what the context was.

[sufrommich]

34. Not the least bit surprised to see such a

vile OP there.Sorry the jury let it stand.

[hunter]

37. I was juror #4, I voted to hide the post. I thought it was creepy.

I don't visit the "Men's Group." Many posts there are creepy.

[KamaAina]

48. I had no idea we even had a Men's Group.

That doesn't strike me as very progressive. Would we have a "Whites Group"?

I once proofread a manuscript of a "men's movement" book way back in the '90s, when "Iron John" was all the rage. I put it down as soon as I came to the chapter titled "My dick speaks". Srsly.

P.S. I am a male. And a feminist.

[intaglio]

53. It is a similar crowd to the "Gungeon"

So avoid reading and posting, just let them fester in their own bile

[KamaAina]

58. I will say one thing for it

Unlike the Gungeon, I have never been on a jury resulting from it. Otherwise, I'd have known about it.

[Warren DeMontague]

88. It's full of people who advocate for things like satanic human sacrifice, and cannibalism. Honest.

Plus I heard one of the hosts faked his birth certificate to cover up the fact that he was really born in Kenya.

[NuclearDem]

91. And serve roasted baby on Mondays.

[Warren DeMontague]

92. It's the Group W Bench, is what it is.

[KamaAina]

93. Only Mondays?

[intaglio]

108. No, but there are plenty of rape apologists

and many more who think that women finally obtaining their rights somehow oppresses them.

Too often participant read like little boys screaming because mummy won't let them play like they want too
WAHHHH!

[Warren DeMontague]

109. Please prove your allegation with links.

There are people on this site who make up all kinds of egregious shit and ascribe it to members of that group. I've seen it happen over, and over, and over again. For instance, we had several weeks in meta of outrage over "defending rape jokes in the mens group", remember? People who admitted they'd never actually gone in to the group, went on about how terrible it was that they're "defending rape jokes over there".

One little problem, no one there actually did that. At all.

So i'd be extremely interested to see a link to an actual post which you consider "rape apologia". Anyone who actually does that, it's not okay. But you have to excuse me if I request some actual proof.

We used to have a particularly unpleasant person who posted here, she claimed to be a lawyer and she always accused people who said stuff she disagreed with, of "slander"... Like they were in court or something.

I dont believe you can "slander" a screen name on a website, but people sure seem to come close with some of the members of that group. So. Please, link.

[intaglio]

111. The forum itself is evidence

I'm sure you can find your way there

[Warren DeMontague]

112. yeah

that's what I thought.

[intaglio]

114. Oh, you don't read critically?

The complaints about false rape allegations (less than 6% of the total if you accept LE figures - which I do not).

The complaints about how modern laws oppress men.

The complaints about denied access to family.

The whining about laws being prejudiced against "men".

What rights should men have that they do not have already?

You go to there, I got sick after my first 3 or 4 visits

[Warren DeMontague]

115. One rape is too many, I'm sure we agree there.

And for the record I support the OP in telling catcallers and street harassers to "fuck off".

However, I don't look at TMG and see this cavalcade of whining, and I certainly don't see people making "apologies" for things like rape. Remember the Duke LaCrosse case? There were people here who desperately wanted to shut that discussion down when it became apparent that it involved a false allegation. Except, the facts don't change just because they don't fit a narrative.

I most certainly don't believe there is anything like some epidemic of false rape allegations, I believe ALL rape allegations should be taken VERY seriously by Law Enforcement... but I haven't seen any actual apologia for rape, which was what you suggested. If it's there, again, in a specific post, I'd be happy to call that poster out. But I haven't seen it.

[BainsBane]

161. That health insurance was unfairly expensive to men

because women cost more due to childbirth. Mind you they have children themselves, and no baby can be created without a man somewhere in the process, but the costs of giving birth to those children are the fault of women.

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

141. Pffft....who cares about that????

They talk about celebrities they want to see nekkid and stuff!!!!! NOW THAT SHIT IS OVER THE LINE!!!!

[Squinch]

144. I like to keep them where they belong: on ignore.

[polly7]

66. There is a Women's Rights & Issues group.

Also, a Feminism and Diversity, Feminists, and History of Feminism group. I don't understand the objection for men to have a group to discuss issues that mainly affect men.

[seabeyond]

67. i dunno. asking how young one can sexualize a girl seems like it pretty well is effecting the girls

more than the men. but wtf....

[polly7]

68. Wtf are you talking about? nt.

[nomorenomore08]

113. A creepy OP in the Men's Group which I believe has now been deleted...

[polly7]

156. How was that a response to my question to the poster I asked it of?

[nomorenomore08]

157. The original OP came off as creepy, even if the poster's intentions may have been relatively benign.

I mean the one in the Men's Group, asking how young was too young RE: sexual attraction. And I don't want to get into a big argument with anybody over this, but clearly some were bothered by the thread, and I don't know the OP's intentions well enough to tell those offended that they're wrong. Like I said, I just don't know...

[polly7]

158. Yeah, I get that.

I was asking someone (not seabeyond) about men having their own group.

[nomorenomore08]

159. For the record, I tend to bounce pretty freely between the Men's Group and HoF.

In both cases there are aspects I like and don't like, threads I do and don't agree with. But as with my occasional postings in the LGBT Group, I do my best to be respectful and not leave a mess, sort of like visiting somebody else's house.

Don't mean to babble on though...

[polly7]

160. lol you're not babbling.

Everyone should have a place to feel safe and discuss things that are important to them as a group without being made uncomfortable for it ... I wouldn't go into one and intentionally cause problems either.

[BainsBane]

149. best thing that ever happened to me

was being banned from that place.

[hunter]

152. My nickname in middle school and high school (before I quit) was "queerbait."

I think that gave me an unusual perspective as a male.

[seabeyond]

153. sigh... ya know.

i am sorry and hope it is in its place and you are way beyond that ugliness.

[pintobean]

50. Sometimes you just have to do

what needs to be done, and let the chips fall where they will. Good for you.

[Stargazer99]

3. because its time people get their rear tail feathers out of that place

and start giving a damn about others and doing something about it
There is so much damage individually and socially
apparently this culture can't seem to deal with it.

[Stargazer99]

4. it is broadcast here because it is political

don't you get it?

[Quantess]

7. It isn't exactly political, except it COULD BE

since women get no respect from republicans, and what I am talking about in my OP is regarding zero respect for women.

This has gone on for way too long! Oh well, humans are just primates, right? Act like monkeys flinging shit at eachother, act like monkeys sexually harrassing teenagers just because it's convenient for you. You subhumans should be ashamed of yourselves. Low IQ

[Harmony Blue]

8. Yeah that is sad that they are doing that

but what you will learn though is that many men are not raised properly to act like men but more like overgrown adult boys refusing to take responsibility.

[Squinch]

38. I love your OP, and your hidden post, but I disagree on one thing: I think it's very political.

I think all the politicians who feel that they have the right to access to our uteruses are cut from the same cloth as any man who sees a child as a sex object.

The attitude that any female is a thing whose most important function is to be there for men's use affects every area of life, and it isn't just Republicans who are holding the attitude.

[Nay]

154. A big plus 1000 for this. nt

[pnwmom]

12. self-delete (dupe)

[pnwmom]

16. Why the hell not broadcast it here? With all the men on this site, don't you think

at least some of this might learn something from this post?

And don't you think some women and girls would like to know they weren't alone in feeling like the OP?

[mike_c]

27. thanks for answering....

You seem to think I was objecting to the OP. I was not-- I was simply curious about what provoked it.

[SwampG8r]

101. yes

I agree with you
drag it out here if its something that's defendable then defend it
it its something you are going to be ashamed of don't say it in the first place
I have a wife and a daughter and consider myself feminism friendly turn men into eminists
daughters turn men into feminists
I learned something from this post
and we don't agree enough in most discussions to where I can cast aside an opportunity to agree with you openly and for all the world to see!

[pnwmom]

102. I've noticed the same phenomenon of daughters

turning men into feminists.

Having sons also opened my mind, but in a different way. Growing up surrounded by girls, I had no idea how vulnerable boys can be.

[seabeyond]

103. Oh, so right on. Now, I have had a lifetime of mostly boys and men.

I have had very few women/girls in my life so I was always well aware of that vulnerability. But that is what bothers me so with all these defining roles. They are just wrong and hurt the spirit of who we are.

[BuelahWitch]

11. It was about an OP regarding finding young females sexually attractive

"How old must a female be so that finding her sexually attractive is not creepy?"

http://www.democraticunderground.com/111410022#post1

Somebody alerted on it. The poster who wrote THIS OP was one of the jurors. She later posted in that thread and her post was hidden for basically stating it was a creepy post (which I agree)

[Precisely]

15. except to women

[pnwmom]

18. Do you really need a list of all the ways men sexually harass girls on the streets?

They can honk at them, whistle at them, make kissing noises at them, follow them while doing all of the above, grab them, poke them, bump into them . . .

Get the idea?

It's not flattering. And to the youngest girls -- 11 year olds and 12 year olds, it's actually scary.

[upaloopa]

55. I am an older man and I feel no man has the right to

invade a young girls space or life. She should be able to grow up happy and unafraid but I can see where that is not the case when people like many of my sex don't care.
I am sorry that we do that.

[pnwmom]

56. People in our generation can help just by making our sons and grandsons and brothers aware.

It's just not acceptable.

[cali]

10. no offense, but your "giant reserve of anger" is not likely the reason you were

never sexually assaulted. why don't you just consider yourself lucky and not make such bullshit claims?

[Quantess]

14. Calmly stated: what causes you to say these are "bullshit claims"?

Edit to add: never mind. I know what you are about. You are one of these women who say "oh, she's bragging" when someone complains about sexual harrassment. I have a middle finger waving in the air to people like you, as well.

[cali]

41. LOL. hardly. I got a lot of attention from men

well into my forties- both appreciated and not so appreciated attention.

what I'm saying is bullshit is your claim that you weren't sexually assaulted because of your attitude or anger as you put it. Lots of tough women have been sexually assaulted.

[Quantess]

65. What it is you are complaining about, exactly?

Would you like to backpedal some more?

[Precisely]

17. why so hostile?

not needed

[pnwmom]

21. What bullshit claims? Are you suggesting that sexual harassment on the street isn't real

or that the OP doesn't have the right to speak out about it?

[cali]

42. no, I'm suggesting that the poster's claim that she was never sexually assaulted

because she had a deep reservoir of anger, is bullshit.

[laundry_queen]

54. I disagree

men who are likely to harass a teenager will usually look for an easy target (shy, submissive). If there's a teen that looks as if she will remove their lungs with a spoon, that teen is less likely to be victimized. It's predator 101 stuff. You might think the claim is over the top, but there may be something to it.

[bettyellen]

131. yes, she is completely off base. while she is correct that tough women also get attacked and

harassed, they are much less likely to than women with a more submissive or relaxed demeanor.
It's not a blame the victim thing, it's something long known about predators.

[Precisely]

85. you missed "probably." and the context

and the point. and the comment about bullies.

[Logical]

19. You need to talk to someone about this anger I think. Not healthy. n-t

[pnwmom]

30. Getting in touch with her anger about this could very well be healthy.

And it could be very healthy for some men to get in touch with their guilt.

[Quantess]

33. Your comment lacks empathy. n-t

[Squinch]

39. She is talking to someone about the anger. It's very healthy. And it's pretty common.

Now, if you want unhealthy, let's talk about those in our very midst who feel that little girls should be seen as sex objects. That's unhealthy.

[Warren DeMontague]

20. Agreed. Oddly, street harassment seems more of an East Coast than West Coast phenomenon.

I wonder why that is.

[pnwmom]

22. I grew up on the east coast. I've noticed there was less of it here in the west coast,

but I thought maybe the whole country was changing.

Probably not though. Too bad.

[bettyellen]

25. the West Coast is so much more segregated, so you are probably referring to

middle to upper class neighborhoods where everyone drives. It's not like that everywhere out west, that's for sure.

[Warren DeMontague]

26. Actually, that observation has been made repeatedly

http://www.democraticunderground.com/125525628

[bettyellen]

31. women get harassed because they are perceived as lower status across the board, and it

happens more frequently to women who are perceived as lower status within the group of all women. Surprised anyone thought this wasn't a fitting subject for GD, as if we weren't half the population.

[Warren DeMontague]

32. That doesn't really have anything to do with what I was saying, but okay.

I think it absolutely is a fitting subject for GD, I'm just wondering what the basis is for the widely reported geographic discrepancy between the East Coast and West.

[pnwmom]

35. I grew up in a middle to upper-middle class east coast town where the kids did walk.

And girls did get harassed by drivers on the street -- especially by truck drivers.

Here on the west coast, this didn't happen much to my daughter, even though we live in a more urban area. So I thought maybe the times had changed -- but maybe it's just a difference between the coasts.

[bettyellen]

45. I do think more women fight back these days. But it's often a matter of opportunity.

Those truck drivers could harass the girls because apparently there were just enough pedestrians, and they just harass and drive off, easy. They'd probably not do that in a smaller middle class town if they were on foot- living and working there because there is a bigger chance of reprisals. In a super crowed area, like NYC they'd be less likely to get singled out for shitty behavior. In lower income neighborhoods, cat calling was normalized and sometimes accepted as flattering, because the ladies enduring it were perceived as low in status as you could get. Compared to a lot of other crap in their lives, it was not their biggest grievance either.

I was just harassed horribly and threatened with rape by an odd stranger downtown, and I wouldn't have even bothered to say anything (it was broad daylight and crowded) but I ran into a cop when the guy was in view. I doubt that cop would have done anything at all if it wasn't a very wealthy neighborhood. As it was I had to assure the police he had said some really disturbing violent and pornographic things and moved in to touch me. Only then did he decide to go talk to the guy.
There's a lot more opportunity for this weird stuff in walkable areas, and walking is more of a way of life out here, was my point.

[seabeyond]

60. When a girl is 12, 13, 14 yrs old she is so inexperienced with standing up for herself

Most all of us put our head down and walked faster. No eye contact. They do with girls knowing vulnerability. It is sick and preying on kids for a grown mans amusement. Get older and the men don't dare cause we are looking them eye to eye. They are cowards. They cannot handle eye to eye

[bettyellen]

134. very true. I was disgusted a few years ago when a 35+ yr old man made a very suggestive remark to my

obviously underage very niece at a Yankee game. I really let him have it, told him exactly how super fucking creepy it was, and that he should be ashamed. She was embarrassed I said something, but I remember letting a lot slide at that age too.
Really, at a baseball you need to make lascivious suggestions to total strangers? WTF, not cool with a grown woman either, but truly disturbing to harass a young girl. ANd the guys he was with acted as if it was normal- truly sad.

[seabeyond]

137. my well endowed 12 yr old niece was out to dinner with one of my friends and a friend of hers.

they were telling me that the over 40 yr old waiter went to pour her water and rub his crotch on her arm, suggestively.

asking what they did??? i was so angry.

my friend said they did nothing. that she was afraid to speak up. that they would have to go in parking lot after and the car was parked on the side of building.

i went after her, and made it clear to those two girls. do you think i would have stayed quiet? do you think i would have worried about embarrassing the man, embarrassing myself, or embarrassing the girls? there were so many options, and lowering eyes was the LEAST of those options. how dare my friend teach my niece and her friend to submit.

it was an opportunity to a listen to NEVER allow a man to denigrate her, and she take it. that her voice was her right. an obligation to speak out, to stop a predator so he did not do that to another girl.

and it was the adults responsibility to teach the girls. she failed.

i listed out the many options they had. staying quiet was not on that list.


so, fuck the dude and his friend. though embarrassed, you gave your niece the best of gifts. and example of voice.

[Ghost Dog]

23. I hear you, and you are not lying, Q.

... From what I've been told, that kind of problem is very common, too common, (in both anglo- and spanish- cultures I've grown to know) from males INSIDE ONE'S OWN FAMILY.

I share your anger. Bust them.

[11 Bravo]

24. Some asshole exposed himself to my wife on the streets of DC a few years ago. Her response ...

was, "You know, that looks just like a penis ... only smaller." She was with a group of co-workers, and the pathetic little weenie-wagger slunk away. I like to think that he thought twice before going down that road again.

[pnwmom]

28. I was tall for my age so it started for me when I was a preteen -- 12 or maybe even 11.

It was such a shock that first time to realize that that CREEPY OLD GUY in the truck was trying to get me to notice him. Yuk!

The road into my downtown was a two-lane state road that drew a lot of trucks and, as I walked the four blocks into town, I could pretty much count on a few honks coming from few different trucks every time I walked. As you know, it was anything but flattering. I felt judged and creeped out -- not flattered or complimented.

When I was thirteen I walked to a babysitting job a few blocks away from my house. On the way, I had to pass a house where some workers were taking a break from a remodeling job. All of a sudden, a group of men had surrounded me on the sidewalk, walking behind me, beside me, making noises at me and comments about me to each other. For those few seconds I was so scared and humiliated! And I'm sure they just thought it was a big joke -- a bunch of workers weren't going to attack me in broad daylight in our quiet little town. But I didn't know what they were going to do -- I was only 13!

[PasadenaTrudy]

36. It started for me at 10

Yup, 10. I'm so happy I'm turning 50 soon and I don't get any attn. It's such a huge relief. Men can be real pigs...

[pnwmom]

47. And I'm sure you weren't the only one. Most girls now have at least started developing

at that age.

[icarusxat]

76. Thank you...

for not saying all men. There are plenty of us who are not, and see the value of the message you are trying to send here...

[PasadenaTrudy]

94. I have great men in my life

Plus my dad was a good guy. Made a difference in the type of men I've chosen to be in relationships with

[intaglio]

40. You are not lying

It happens and too many people let it pass without comment.

That sickening post in Mens Rights should have been expunged

[Squinch]

44. +1

[Precisely]

86. ^^^^^^

[Squinch]

43. One other note: do you think any of those men who do harass girls have any idea how

skanky they are to the girls they harass?

Seriously, I think these guys are hoping for some return admiration. They have no idea how skin-crawl-inducing they are.

The very act is absolute proof of enormous delusion.

[pnwmom]

46. I bet they don't. We're supposed to appreciate the attention, no matter how young we are. n/t

[JI7]

49. yes, there is something wrong with us if we don't like it

[Squinch]

73. Blech. Just thinking about how that feels when you are confronted with one of those assholes

nauseates me.

And something else. It was one thing when it happened to me, and that had its own set of emotions, but now that I have loved ones who are young girls who are subject to it, the thought of THEM going through it makes me almost murderously angry.

[Precisely]

87. they know

it's intimidation

[seabeyond]

90. agreed. that is the point and why a guy cant talk himself out of just what it is. they know.

we know. and they do it anyway.

[Squinch]

142. I know what you are talking about: those guys who block the sidewalk,

or honk at a girl walking down the street.

But there is another species of this that, for some reason, I was very subject to in my younger days. Older men seemed to think that they could convince me to be with them by strutting either their wealth or power in front of me, and persisting long after I had established that there was no way it was going to happen. I had a different career when I was younger, one that had plenty of my own power attached to it. So I could never understand why they thought their preening and boasting would change my mind about them.

As I write this, I see your point applies here too. I was a young woman with some power. Their persistent and uncomfortable advances were to put me in my place in relation to their power.

OK. I get it now.

[seabeyond]

147. as men continually tell us, all us young women are biologically made up to go for the old fart with

$. we simply cannot help it anymore than they can help wanting to fuck a 13 yr old.

now, reality is.... on average, the age difference is 2 yrs. shoots that theory all to hell. but fact and reality does not matter. and the more financial opportunity and freedom women have gained, the more the number has reduced.

and seeing the reality that the majority of men do not want to fuck a 13 yr old also does not seem to matter in these adamant opinions that are spewed as science.

[JoeyT]

107. I don't think they care.

I used to wonder that too. "Why the hell would someone catcall/whistle/honk/whatever at some random woman that has zero interest in them? Has that EVER worked?" Then I finally realized that getting the woman to pay attention isn't the goal for most of them. The goal is to intimidate, harass, and humiliate. It's to "put her in her place".

[raccoon]

117. wish I could rec your post. nt

[Precisely]

123. Exactly

Waving their balls, even better if other men are around to egg em on.

[seabeyond]

126. it mostly is around other men. it really is all about showing off to their peers. the girl/woman is

not a person, insignificant and only a tool to prove to the boys what a man he is.

[Precisely]

127. power

[seabeyond]

129. always. dominance, control. nt

[bettyellen]

143. yep. I have caught a few guy friends acting out in disturbing ways and boy were they upset

that a woman they did like or respected caught them acting like huge asses to women. What they cared about was that I'd have less interest in them, or speak poorly about them to other women so they would have less chance of getting laid, basically. What I have never seen was any thought towards the women they did treat poorly- or any self reflection that their behavior was fucked up. They didn't care about that part. They just didn't like getting caught and suffering any fallout from it.

[hotrod0808]

51. Rec'd

[BlueJazz]

52. Sorry you've had to endure some of that degrading crap. It can be quite scary.

I think men who do it are sociopaths...

[seabeyond]

57. that was a fuckin ridiculous fuckin hide for you from inablers to allow the boys to play at will...

cause, they are just being boys and cant help themselves. how the hell did that post of yours get hidden. a fuckin grown ass man asks how young can a girl be that he gets off on before he is a creep and it stands. proudly. not a sole calls the person out.

you, ... you get the post hidden.

bullshit.

and agree. most all us girls have had grown fuckin old ass men hittin on us. 12 yr old and some man talking to us about our boobs.

sick creeps.

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

78. Because going into a group....

....and doing an "I hate you all" dance for what one person posted is not really welcome.

Maybe if the Men's Group just banned everyone for saying anything the least bit disagreeable to the agenda, or covered for others advocating certain things like castration, we wouldn't have a PR problem.

[pintobean]

80. Except, that's not what happened.

She was forced into that thread as a juror. If that hadn't happened, she probably would have never seen that creepy-ass post. She returned to the thread after jury duty and posted the jury results. In her jury comments, she told off the people who replied to the OP, not everyone in the group, and she didn't say anything about hating anyone.
Your silly spin is insulting to anyone with a brain. The OP self deleted that pos on some good advise. I'd suggest you do the same here.

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

82. Telling everyone who replied to the OP to "fuck off" is abusive....

Even if you do it in some bullshit passive aggressive way of "It was thru my jury post".

Nice try, though. Your "suggestion" has been filed appropriately.

[pintobean]

84. Her post was hidden

and she took her medicine. You coming into this thread and mischaracterizing what she did makes it look like you're defending that creepy shit. Now, I'd prefer you not self delete. Sunshine is a wonderful thing.

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

138. Bullshit, and I have zero intention of self-deleting anything

That's a tact some others use very well, however.

My reply was to someone else who came into this thread to complain about it being hidden (as well as get their usual digs in on that group) and I pointed out why it was hidden. It was abusive, period.

As far as "defending creepy shit", apparently now simply posting in a thread you and others deemed creepy is "defending it" and merits a "fuck off"? That's what was said....I would like to tell everyone who responded to this OP to fuck off. Whatever. Keep the spin going, it's quite amusing.

By the way, I wasn't the alerter. I, like you, have no problem letting people's shit stand on it's own.

[seabeyond]

81. she posted a jury result. try again. i have yet to see any poster get a post hidden for posting

a jury result.

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

139. Abusive jury comments, even when not made public are not tolerated here as far as I know

Why should someone be allowed to get to tell numerous DU'ers to "fuck off" (with no real good reason or creepiness behind any of their comments) and hide behind that ten pound sack of crap in a five pound bag?

[seabeyond]

146. bullshit. seems who is being called out in a comment. nt

[Precisely]

124. sexually creepy is good for business

all business, all the time, all over. Challenge the right to exploit sexy young bodies? OUT!!!

[seabeyond]

128. absolutely. i think that is why it is so hard for the men to address when they are in leadership.

a lifetime of supporting bros in this search of masculinity. why you will see them laugh at an milf joke to stake claim peeing on territory, yet a lighten up, just a joke mentality. it is very very hard for a man to stand up to peers. i think we women have a much easier time. maybe. i will have to think about it. i can see in one way it being tough for girls. maybe i was just never a follower. ours is more about of course, our looks.... lol and presenting our sexuality to, ya, men

[Precisely]

130. it's equal opportunity exploitation these days.

and still a man's world

[laundry_queen]

59. It started quite young for me also

except in the end I WAS date raped and assaulted, likely because I was shy and submissive and had been bullied by my parents my whole life, and I didn't know how to stand up for myself or even how to disobey a direct command by someone.

I was around 11 when the harassment first started with being grabbed and kissed by some older teens at a party across the street (I was playing in the park adjacent to the house). At 12 my 'boyfriend's' (in quotes because we liked each other but weren't serious) dad was always hugging me. At 13 the father I was babysitting for was hitting on me non stop, telling me I had a great body. At 14, my manager at the restaurant I worked at grabbed my ass and boobs on a regular basis. Kept asking me when I was going to marry him. When I was 16, my brother's 45 year old married hockey coach groped me and called me hot.

This doesn't even include the stupid whistles, obscene gestures, propositions from random men on the street, or from the groping and harassment from boys my age.

The 'nice guys' you refer to remind me of my parents. They said I was always 'exaggerating' and was told those guys 'didn't mean anything by doing that' and that I was being 'too sensitive'. The message I got: you deserve what is happening to you. The other message I got was that I should enjoy the attention because I was lucky to get it.
It's all bullshit.

[Bernardo de La Paz]

61. Harassment is rampant and it grinds people down. Stop it, folks:

[seabeyond]

63. luv this. an absolute fav. and so point on. thank you. nt

[seabeyond]

64. lots of pictures. a little reading. but little words, so should be good to go. lots of pics.

Last edited Fri Sep 13, 2013, 11:47 PM - Edit history (1)

[Sheldon Cooper]

75. Did you really just say that?

Holy fucking shit...

[LittleBlue]

83. I lol'd

Sorry but I couldn't help it

As to the rest of the thread, what started this again? Dude's post was self deleted so...

[Cronus Protagonist]

97. I have no idea

I only post here when I'm drunk and my posts usually have no relation to the actual subject of the OP.

[LittleBlue]

98. Most excellent

[Squinch]

145. Dude's post was self deleted because he realized how turd-like it made him appear.

And how turd-like it makes all those who defend it.

The slobbering toad just slipped out of the cage for a second, and we all saw it. Self delete or not, we know it's there.

Lol away.

[NuclearDem]

89. Not appropriate.

[Rex]

69. To grown men who sexually harrass teenagers:

you are creepy scum. EOM.

EDIT - to add the word creepy.

[devils chaplain]

70. I've never even witnessed this phenomenon, I don't think...

Maybe I'm just oblivious. I've seen the "pickup artists" move in, though. It makes me cringe.

[Squinch]

74. They don't do it when a woman (or a girl) is with a man.

[raccoon]

118. Exactly, because a woman alone is "public property." A woman with a man

is "private property." to a certain mentality.

[Squinch]

140. Bingo. And a woman alone is "asking for it" by virtue of not having attached herself to a man.

[Bernardo de La Paz]

71. Cool vid makes the point:

&feature=player_embedded#t=0

[seabeyond]

77. just get tired... another very good piece from you. thank you. nt

[Bernardo de La Paz]

116. Here

The video shows a woman, who sometimes plays a second role as well, presenting a polemic about sexual harassment on the street by creepy men. This thread's Original Post (q.v., which see) is an approximation of the thesis of the video.

That summary and thesis does not spoil the video which is enjoyable as well as presenting an important point of view.

[seabeyond]

121. he does not give a shit. just jumped in to derail. sorry you though him sincere. nt

[Bernardo de La Paz]

132. It's OK. He fighting a battle from another thread and dragged it in here.

I have been asking people to give summaries of videos when they post them. Most recently in another thread where he posted a snotty request for a summary of the bible. So I indulged him there and again here.

I posted this one without a summary because I thought the post title ("Cool vid makes the point:&quot referred to the Original Post and that would serve as a summary. However, sometimes when people are being "difficult" on purpose to make a facetious point, it backfires when you give them a straight-up reply.

[seabeyond]

135. i see. thanks for the explanation. nt

[Precisely]

136. Summary of the Bible

Old Testament: Be grateful you're here
New Testament: Love one another

[Bernardo de La Paz]

148. Summary of the bible

[arely staircase]

72. some people

seem to have no sense of boundaries or propriety. I have seen grown men gawk at my 13 year old niece. Not harrassment per se but "checking out" the girl who, though does look older than her age, is still young enough to be the daughter of those doing the gawking

[NuclearDem]

79. Men really need to learn to keep it in their pants.

They need to realize women aren't just there to get them off.

It's exceptionally disgusting to see grown men trying to get in teenagers' pants.

[grahamhgreen]

95. How bout grown women?

[Recursion]

100. How "very small" is that percentage?

Even as a guy, just watching it in DC and NYC was depressing as hell. Not as bad as where I am now, though (Mumbai).

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eve_teasing

Ugh.

[pnwmom]

104. I explained in another post

that there was a several block walk I would take to my town's downtown. Vehicles, mostly trucks, would drive by and honk or whatever. This started when I was 11 or 12 and I didn't feel flattered -- just creeped out. I'll never forget walking into town one day with a boyfriend when I was about 18. And, as usual, every block or so someone else would drive by and honk. All of a sudden my boyfriend got so frustrated he just lost it. He grabbed my shopping bag out of my hands and threw it on the ground out of sheer frustration! The bag had nothing to do with anything -- it was just the only thing he could throw, I guess. It was pretty funny -- and gratifying, too, because I knew that he did "get it." That kind of attention isn't fun.

[BainsBane]

150. I don't think it is so small

I was harassed and propositioned for prostitution a great deal as a young girl, starting about age 10. It was far too frequent to be a small percentage of men. The posts by other women in this thread with the same experiences also make clear that it is far too common to be a "very small percentage" of men.

[ForgoTheConsequence]

105. It's disgusting.

I've seen construction workers cat call and honk at jr high kids (12-14).

[longship]

106. I learned "nice guy" at my parents' knees.

That's what more people need to know.

I stand with you. Thanks for this post. More guys need to know this.


BTW, I am male.

[Le Taz Hot]

110. Nature had determined that I would

be well endowed early on. I think I was barely 13 the first time some complete asshole stranger walked up to me to inform me he wanted to "titty fuck" me. I had NO idea what he was talking about and it scared the living bejezus outta me. I've had vile comments made to me, been, literally, grabbed, squeezed, and groped, all WITHOUT my permission. And that's AFTER making every attempt to hide my shape (bulky t-shirts and sweatshirts). Luckily, our society treats women over 50 as if they're invisible which, after 40 years of groping, I'm JUST fine with.

Quantess, I KNOW you're anger. I truly do. I have NO idea what makes men think it's OK to approach young women in these ways. It's literally enough to make you sick.

[eridani]

119. A major, major benefit of being old. Sure I miss the strength and resilience I used to have

--but being ignored by jackasses goes a long way to make up for that. I think I somehow stuffed all the memories of harassment down the same memory hole where I put the memories of premenstrual tension and breast soreness.

[Precisely]

125. Both these replies

are truly heartmoving. The pain this causes. Reflecting how culture treats women. If people want to know what's up, here it is. Hope you find yourselves comfortable in your own skin.

[Nay]

155. Gotta agree there. The lack of harassment after the age of about 40 was SO SO wonderful. A major

benefit of aging.

I remember at about the age of 16 I was riding home from work on my bike when a truck full of men hollered, "Let's get her!" I was never so terrified in my life. I raced away and escaped. I have no idea if they were serious, but for a group of men to say that to a girl was beyond horrendous.

I also suffered a number of ass gropes, boob gropes, catcalls, and two (I repeat that, TWO) abduction attempts. I got away both times, the perps were never caught, and I am certain that either incident would have resulted in my rape and death.

I realize that I can still be abducted/murdered, etc., but at least I am partially released from the whole sexual predator component of men's behavior. Just that has been a great relief.

[Lunacee_2013]

120. A-FUCKING-MEN!!!

I know how you feel. I started getting the drive-by hoots when I was 11. Freaking 11! During the summer a neighbor would let us use their pool on the weekends. It was great,until we had to go home. I hated that walk home because of all the harassment we girls got, and keep in mind we were all between the ages of 8-11. Creepy indeed.

[MrScorpio]

122. K&R nt

[LWolf]

133. Hopefully

you won't find your audience here. I hope DU is not populated by grown men who sexually harass teenagers.

For the rest, I agree. I experienced harassment from about the age of 11; I was physically precocious. I remember being intimidated, embarrassed, and sometimes outright scared.

[BainsBane]

151. Quantess. Just wanted to let you know