John Boehner’s Wife Calls For Her Shutdown King To Come Back To Bed

[kpete]

John Boehner’s Wife Calls For Her Shutdown King To Come Back To Bed
NEWS IN BRIEF • Politics • Politicians • News • ISSUE 49•42 • Oct 14, 2013

WASHINGTON—As her husband worked late into the night devising a strategy to negotiate the ongoing budget crisis that has ground Washington to a halt, the wife of House Speaker John Boehner called for her big, strong Shutdown King to come back to bed, sources confirmed early Monday morning. “It sounds like my Mr. Powerful Shutdown King is working awfully hard; maybe he needs something to help him take his mind off his kingly duties?” a negligee-wearing Deborah Boehner playfully called out from the couple’s bedroom, urging “His Majesty” to turn off his phone for five minutes and join her in their royal chamber. “My mighty deadlock leader has brought the federal government to its knees, but maybe now he can take his scepter and do the same to his Shutdown Queen? Your wish is my command, sire.” At press time, Boehner was mumbling “not now” under his breath.

http://www.theonion.com/articles/john-boehners-wife-calls-for-her-shutdown-king-to,34213/

[Shrike47]

1. Oh come on, he hasn't been in that bed in years! The orange is finally washed out of the sheets.

[Segami]

2. Oh come on,...

..I don't believe Deborah was wearing a negligee for the boehner......

[Segami]

3. "Working awfully hard??"........BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...

[riderinthestorm]

4. I'm thinking there are serious performance issues on every level

[MrMickeysMom]

5. As told by John's drinking buddies ... She's pissed!

His wife is not speaking to him!

So, JB goes into another bar and asks the for a drink. He asks the bartender for another. After a couple more drinks, the bartender gets worried.

"What's the matter?" the bartender asks.

"My wife and I got into a fight," explains JB... "and now she isn't talking to me for a whole 31 days."

The bartender thought about this for a while. "But, isn't it a good thing that she isn't talking to you?" he ask Boehner...

"Yeah, except today is the last night."

[Skittles]

6. SCHEDULING KPETE FOR ASS KICKING

*EGREGIOUS VISUAL*

[BluegrassStateBlues]

7. She better send him a golden ticket for the chocolate factory. nt

[Warren DeMontague]

8. So Not

A Mental Image I Need