UN Appoints Sarah Palin to Mediate Ukraine Crisis

[Earth_First]

The United Nations has appointed Sarah Palin as a special envoy to Ukraine, hoping she can help mediate a solution to the growing geopolitical crisis in that country.

According to sources close to the situation, Palin and a team of international crisis experts will fly to Kiev tonight to meet with Ukrainian officials before moving on to Moscow to negotiate a final settlement with Russia’s President Vladimir Putin over the fate of the disputed Crimea region.

In an exclusive interview, U.N. President Ban Ki-Moon said he chose Palin because of her impressive first-hand knowledge of the region and hopes she can facilitate a dialogue that avoids war.

“If it’s one thing I know about Sarah Palin, it’s that she never quits a job half-way through. I believe she can end this crisis once and for all,” he asserts.

http://dailycurrant.com/2014/03/02/un-appoints-sarah-palin-to-mediate-ukraine-crisis/

[louis-t]

1. Hawwwww!

It only took the first 4 words to make me laugh.

[Arkana]

2. I'm unironically happy I was able to spot this as satire before even clicking it.

[uppityperson]

3. Headline made me smile. The Onion? Borowitz? Dailycurrant?

[MattSh]

4. Good satire is not quite this obvious.

[Tommy_Carcetti]

5. Her mediation will consist of her shouting outside her kitchen window. nt

[eppur_se_muova]

6. Any ruse that sends her away is a good ruse ...

and if she doesn't come back, it's excellent.

[kwassa]

7. She can see the Ukraine from her front porch, can't she?

[Earth_First]

9. Only at low tide. nt

[JoeyT]

8. Shame this isn't real.

Though it'd cost us a fortune to go pick her dumb-ass up when she ended up in Uruguay. If we went and got her at all.