Thank fucking hank… my mother finally died.
She's had diagnosed Alzheimer's for 12 years. If we, as a society allowed a compassionate option, she would have chosen death 6 years ago when she still could chew and talk and appreciate wit.
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It's a shame you both had to endure that. I couldn't put it better than anyone else on this thread already has. I'm in complete agreement. We've become entirely too mean, hard-hearted, and utterly devoid of any human compassion. May you have peace, healing, and renewal.
TYY
My heart goes out to you. I have never had your experience, but I've heard and read about them. Honesty wins.
So very sorry for your loss. I know your pain.
It was way past time for you both. We need a more peaceful, compassionate and dignified way to let our loved ones go. We need a choice.
Intense hugs to you and yours.
May your mom finally rest in peace.
I think you are beyond inaccurate in your assertion. 
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/01/18/AR2007011800616.html
Art Buchwald, 81, the newspaper humor columnist for more than a half-century whose newfound comic material about death revived his celebrity, died of kidney failure Jan. 17 at his son's home in Washington.
Buchwald, an owlish, cigar-chomping extrovert whose column won the Pulitzer Prize for commentary in 1982, teased death for the past year, after kidney and vascular problems forced doctors to amputate one of his legs just below the knee. Refusing dialysis, in February he entered the Washington Home and Community Hospices, which he described as "a place where you go when you want to go."
Then, amazing himself, his doctors, friends and the scores of reporters who thronged to him for a last goodbye, Buchwald didn't die. His kidneys began to work again. By July, he left hospice for his summer home. "Instead of going straight upstairs, I am going to Martha's Vineyard," he wrote. >snip<
I hope to gods that none of our resident life-at-all-costs-this-means-you-want-to-kill-the-disabled folks shows up in this thread. May they simply read and learn the depths and complexities there are to human suffering.
Peace, Luminous, peace.
My mom died last year after suffering from dementia for 5 years. Thankfully, her heart gave out after a pelvic fracture so she didn't have to go through the worst of the dementia. She was in a nursing home for two years already, her disease progressing rapidly. Still, we might have looked at another two or three years of misery for her and us.
You have been grieving the loss of your mom for years, without getting to say a final goodbye. Now you finally can do that and move on.
... and everywhere else, insisted I was her father and that I should stop teasing her.
Somehow I managed to choke it down, shift gears and play the part, and she was happy.
She died a few days later.
Still, better than Alzheimer's. My wife's grandma and her family suffered through that, and I know it was worse.
Solidarity.
TYY
TYY
I've gone through that with a parent as well, but fortunately he did not linger long beyond the 'nobody home' barrier. I cannot imagine 6 years of it, and I hope your family has peace at last.
There is a well connected and well financed church with a strong subscriber base that fights tooth and nail to keep an option that any human person would do for a pet, for fuck's sake, fully illegal for the people we love the most. No matter how badly they want it. No matter how much they are suffering. None of that matters to the RCC. When we legalized it here in Washington state, every individual donor in the top 15, and every organization in the top ten donor list, was some tentacle of the catholic church. We even had martin sheen in practically every commercial break, whipping off the glasses he didn't even wear for dramatic effect, lying about the way the law worked to scare voters the other way.
It was a vicious fight, but reason prevailed and I-1000 passed. 3 states in the union have now recognized this fundamental right, and yet... we have a lot of work to do.
I've lost several in the last year and just got back from the ICU where my favorite aunt is lying in a coma that she's not likely to come out of. I have a lot of mixed feeling, sadness and relief and regrets that I didn't spend more time with each one, but in the end you just have to say goodbye and promise to remember them. Anyhow hang in there.
My grandmother was just diagnosed with Alzheimer's when she fell and broke her hip, she never recovered from that. Very grateful we were spared the agony you were forced to endure. Peace to you.
For all that she, and all of you went through and for her loss, no matter what .... I know it must still be a horrible hurt. May your mom finally rest in peace. 
She's doing very well so far, but I fear for what's coming. My mil had it too and she lived about 10 yrs after her diagnosis. It was a slow and gentle passing, though she spent the last 3 years sleeping and being spoon-fed. Once in a while she uttered a word or two.
So I know what you've been through and I think I totally get what you're saying. I'm so sorry for your loss, and her loss.
My father is 89 and has had dementia for the past ten years. I've watched him slowly deteriorating, so I can relate to what you experienced with your mom. It's so hard watching a parent become so vulnerable and helpless.
If only we had a compassionate society when it comes to issues of birth & death. Alas, the crazies have been allowed to take over the conversation - all for profit. It's obscene.
Strength to you & your family.
Your post is wise and terribly sad at the same time.
Hope you can find some peace now.
Death with dignity is rarely possible with Alzheimer's. I am sorry you and she suffered for so many years.
It is a fate I would wish on nobody.
Not even the worst human I can imagine.
Not only is it torture for the victim, but for the entire family.
I know I'm preaching to the choir here, but it just can't be said enough.
and may your late mother RIP. which I shall light today for you and her.
Dementia so I know all too well what you both went through. Peace to you both.
Peace...
You are in my thoughts.
for what your mom and you have had to endure, Luminous Animal. Alzheimer's is a brutal disease that claims many victims, other than the one afflicted with the disease. I am glad your mom is free and that you and your family at last have peace.
Many hugs and good wishes to you, and gentle passage to your mom.
Peace to you and your mom.
May you find peace now that her suffering has ended.
And I'm very sorry she had such a prolonged death.
My brilliant, achieved, incredibly bright and engsging mom was diagnosed with early-onset in 2006. She just sort of gave up, by '10 she was in care and I'm hard pressed to get a flicker of a smile from her these days, let alone speech or recognition.
I grieved for her a long time ago, as did the rest of the family. When she finally passes, we will shamelessly celebrate her release
