I'm asking myself, what the hell is going to happen, next!

[Siwsan]

As some of you know, I lost my sister and mother, just 3 weeks apart so I'm deep in the grieving process AND trying to wade through estate business while still planning Mom's memorial service.

Monday I was driving to meet up with my brother so we can get some issues taken care of and a rear tire blew on the freeway. Ok. it was time for new tires, anyway, so I decided to get that taken care of while we met with our advisor. But then I found out my struts and shocks were kaput. And, yes, it is an honest, reliable place so I said go ahead and so the work. Not a small bill.

Today I'm headed down the same freeway, and at almost the exact same spot my timing belt "slipped" and my car stopped. So, another sizable repair bill.

The poor mechanic! I BURST into tears, and not about the cost but just from the stress. He didn't quite know what to do so he tore off several sheets of paper towels for me to mop up the tears. In retrospect, it was a pretty funny scene.

Anyway, I'd say I'm at my wit's end, but that might just temp fate to drop another bombshell on my life.

Thanks for letting me vent. Time for a Scottish tranquilizer. (Single Malt)

[shenmue]

1. {{{Siwsan}}}

[Warpy]

2. If it wasn't for bad luck, some days we'd have no luck at all

I'm sorry you're dealing with so much shit all at once. I hope you're just getting it all over with.

[Siwsan]

10. Do you remember that song "Cheer Up"

'Cheer up, things could get worse
Cheer up, it does no good to curse
They said that I should cheer up
That things could get must worse
So I cheered up
Sure enough, things got worse.

[Warpy]

34. No, but I did sort of flash on an old Hank Williams song

http://www.metrolyrics.com/everythings-okay-lyrics-hank-williams.html

[Siwsan]

38. Now you've done it - you made me laugh!

[malaise]

54. Tomorrow Robins will Sing

They will

[Siwsan]

56. That was wonderful

Made me teary eyed, in a good way. Even more special because it's Stevie - one of Michigan's best talents and one of my favorite artists.

[malaise]

57. Never be afraid to cry

Tears are like rain - they cleanse us.

[salin]

3. So very sorry for your losses, and the extra aggravations thrown your way

May you find moments of peace to get you through the 'muddling through' period. As you can, be good to yourself.

[Siwsan]

8. I am taking an early retirement, in a couple of months - HOPEFULLY

I'm not going to plan on having any fun. DID YOU HEAR THAT, FATE??????

[salin]

11. may fate throw an adventure your way... just to make it interesting

and a wee bit more bearable.

When the time comes - enjoy retirement.

[chillfactor]

4. i know what you mean....

first I lost my teaching job at a private school because the enrollment dropped, then I had a car accident and have been laid up for four weeks with no vehicle, and then the landlord decided he wanted to remodel this house and I have to move.......at 73 and in poor health to begin with...it has all become too much for me.............

[Siwsan]

5. I guess it's amazing what we handle, when we have no other choice

At any other time I could take the double car issues in stride. After all, I wasn't physically hurt. But right now I'm so emotionally exhausted. I just keep thinking that things will get better. I hope the same for you!

[Not Me]

6. I hope your luck turns around.

Any one of these on its own can be an emotional nightmare, but to have multiple issues occur in rapid succession can really take its toll.
Find the strength from within to see your way through this.
Hugs to you.

[randome]

7. The fact that you can say "the poor mechanic" is admirable.

[hr][font color="blue"][center]Birds are territorial creatures.
The lyrics to the songbird's melodious trill go something like this:
"Stay out of my territory or I'll PECK YOUR GODDAMNED EYES OUT!"[/center][/font][hr]

[Siwsan]

9. I know - the look on his face was pure panic

I actually felt sorry for him!

[Pakid]

12. Sad to say but there are times when you just can't win

I wish I could make it all better for you. Only time will make it better even bad luck has to run out at some point!

[chillfactor]

13. i hope you are right about bad luck running out at some point....

I have had enough bad luck in the past three years...I hope good luck hits me sooner than later...

[BlancheSplanchnik]

29. I hope it does for you too.

Hang in...oh, I know--the patience and perseverance are hard. I sure do know. But no storm lasts forever. So.......more perseverance. *gak*

[riderinthestorm]

14. Oh no Siwsan! 2015 is looking like your annus horribilus...

I'm so so sorry. You're truly living the old adage that when it rains it pours...

[seveneyes]

15. Dear Abby

You are what your are and you ain't what you ain't
So listen up Buster, and listen up good
Stop wishing for bad luck and knocking on wood

[Siwsan]

17. I'm definitely accepting that life is what it is

I think I'm just emotionally exhausted and now constantly waiting for the other 'shoe to fall'. Or, in my case, shoe store.

[cwydro]

16. Hugs.

I know the feeling.

[Siwsan]

18. Another of the reasons I love DU - someone usually identifies with a situation

Kind words are my salvation.

[cwydro]

24. We're all here for you.

[Sherman A1]

19. As was once said to me....

"Life is just one damn thing after another."

Sorry for your troubles and hope things resolve themselves soon.

[HappyMe]

20. I'm sorry for your losses.

It does seem like bad things come in waves.

I hope things level out for you.

[Sheepshank]

21. First and foremost, I am so sorry about your mother and sister.

Those are very difficult deaths at the best of times. I am so sorry you are dealing with car issues. Anything by itself is do-able, but all clumped together like this is truly magnified. I am glad you have trust in you mechanic. Can't even imagine dealing with the thoughts of being ripped off on top of everything else. If your mother's estate is on solid ground, may I suggest you hire an attorney to do ALL of the work for you. You can give him/her initial directions and let them handle the rest? In addition, breathe and take a lavendar bath. It won't fix anything, but it will help you relax a little so that these bumps in the road will not feel like you are being bludgeoned with a mallet. Hugs.

[Siwsan]

22. Thanks.

We do have a good attorney. Fortunately, my name is on everything as co-owner or beneficiary, her house is in the trust and the trust was transferred to my control, once we realized what was happening with Mom (Alzheimer's). There is just me and my brother, now, and we are on the same page.

I go back to work, tomorrow, and I'm dreading it. The tears still seem to erupt at the most inopportune moments. Like at the mechanics. They might just suggest I go back home.

[Worried senior]

23. They always say

that bad luck happens in three's so I'd say you were past the worst. Sure hope so.

So sorry about your mother and sister.

[progressoid]

25. Yeah,

I remember bursting into tears in the bread isle at the grocery store after my brother died. Got a couple looks from some customers!

This too will pass...

[annabanana]

26. It does feel like Fate piles trial on top of trial.

When you are dealing with the pain and confusion that surrounds you in these times, a small annoyance, that would have been little more than a distraction in an easier time feels like another weight, perhaps insupportable, that has been put on your back.

My prayers and as much cyber-support as is possible are yours. You "only" have to put one foot in front of the other.

[TNNurse]

27. If it is true

That what doesn't kill us makes us stronger..... you may be invincible.

Good luck with retirement. I retired in December and things have been rocky, but they have to improve. It is great to get up when you please.

[Half-Century Man]

28. If survival makes you stronger.

I think that shortly, you'll be able to survive a nuclear blast....shit.

FWIW, Glenfiddich single malt is nice.

[Siwsan]

31. I have a nice bottle of Cardhu

And if things aren't better by the weekend, my prize bottle of Penderyn (Welsh Whiskey - very lovely)

[Half-Century Man]

37. GlenF is a little commercial

But cost effective for me. I get to buy a couple bottles a year.


On edit: just Googled Penderyn. Ye gods... 34.25 pounds for the cheapest featured bottle............Yeah save that one for the big moments.

[Siwsan]

40. I think it's a fine single malt

I first tasted Cardhu at the duty free shop in Heathrow - they actually had a tasting room. I always bought a bottle for my Dad, at Christmas. The Penderyn is a new taste treat - hard to find and not available in Michigan. My cousin founds it in Illinois and brought it to me, after my sister died. I love soothing my Welsh soul with a little Welsh spring water. Well, fermented Welsh spring water.

[Half-Century Man]

42. They (Penderyn) have a web site.

You can order from there. I'll go back and look later. Still suffering sticker shock.

I've never tried Cardhu, but I will.

[Siwsan]

44. I will stretch this bottle for as long as humanly possible

My cousin wouldn't let me reimburse him for the purchase but I figured it was pretty pricey. Cardhu is more in line with my budget, but I still try to make it last.

[leftieNanner]

30. I'm so sorry

but I think a wee dram is good medicine. A Balvenie perhaps or a Macallan 12?

Take care of yourself.

[BlancheSplanchnik]

32. sometimes, ya do need the kindness of strangers.

hang in! RAH! FIGHT! Once more, into the fray.

[Siwsan]

35. Strangers, maybe, but I think of many DUers as cyber friends

You (DUers) have been a great support for me, during this nightmare of a time. It's a great reciprocity support.

[BlancheSplanchnik]

39. I agree.

[world wide wally]

33. This seems to be the time for rotten luck. I don't want to list the string that I've had lately, but

know that is isn't just you. In any case, we can only carry on and do what we can.
Spring will come once again.

[lpbk2713]

36. It's good you could find some humor in the mechanic.

It shows you still have some resilience left after all you've been through.

Hang in there.

[JoePhilly]

41. I'm right there with you ...

... Father in law died 2 months ago, good friends wife diagnosed with cancer around Christmas, my mom died unexpectedly 2 weeks ago, mother of wife's boss died last week, my boss's aunt died yesterday ... And my wife found a lump last week.

But earlier today ... The tests on the lump came back clear, no cancer.

Honestly, we were expecting the worst given all the rest.

My wife and I are going out to dinner tonight to celebrate.

So hang in there!!!

[CTyankee]

43. We've all been there, Siwsan. Please know that we know.

Read some poetry. See some art. Art always saves you. You will come back refreshed and reassured.

I know there are many who have endured much more than I have. If I could pray, I would pray for them. I am grateful that my luck is good so far.

Hang in there...we're all here if you need us...

[Siwsan]

45. My cats are determined to head butt the grief, right out of me

They've been pretty much plastered by my side, when ever I am home, looking cute and distracting me from dark places.

[brer cat]

52. Get into the middle of that hug

and you will have to feel better.

I am sorry trouble continue to show up on your doorstep. I hope it ends very soon.

[Siwsan]

55. I have been, just about every night

They used to sleep in another room, at night, but their behavior has changed, since this happened, and they both insist on snuggling me to sleep, every night.

BTW, that's Sophie Stinky Toes (the little tuxedo) and Boudicca.

[femmocrat]

46. We are also going through some tough sh*t right now..... You have my sympathy, Siwsan.

Hope this helps a little:

[Siwsan]

47. I love that!

And, I figure as long as I can maintain my sense of humor, I still have a grip, sometimes tenuous, but a grip none the less.

[femmocrat]

48. Oh good!

I'm so glad you liked it. We DUers have to stick together!

Humor can help a lot.

[Dont call me Shirley]

49. I'm so sorry Siswan for your repeated trauma.

Please, speaking from experience, don't ask that question because the universe will show you what the hell is gong to happen next.

[Siwsan]

50. The universe is capricious, that's for sure

I'm going to try to just focus on the here and now - can't do anything about the past, and damn little about the future is within my control.

[Dont call me Shirley]

64. There is one important thing the past holds, that is to learn from it. The more one can learn from

their past the better their present and future can become. I honor your survival on this difficult part of your path.

[Frustratedlady]

51. Been there, done that with parents dying 6 weeks apart and

siblings (who had nothing to do with their care) wanted to divide everything up the day after the last funeral. I lost it because I was SO tired and beaten down.

There are good days ahead, but it sure feels like they take their time coming. May these messages to you turn your luck around and allow you to see the sun at the end of the tunnel. Vent all you want. Getting it off your chest is the best medicine.

[Siwsan]

53. I'm fortunate - it's just me and my brother and we are in agreement

We've gone through every step of this nightmare, together. We have just each other, now.

[JohnnyLib2]

58. To share the family motto for such times---

Muddle through.
(Usually followed by "what the hell choice is there?"

[HereSince1628]

59. Life can be like this...been there...

Life is a daily thing, acknowledging that today is very challenging is perfectly OK.

What doesn't kill you doesn't make you stronger. It makes you more experienced with the tough side of life.

Statistically, the universe doesn't favor imbalance, it favors regression toward the mean.

That's how the actuarials in the insurance company guide profitability. It's a rational way to think about next week, next month and next year. Wherever you are things are likely to move toward average.

But it isn't a forecast. It cannot be guaranteed. It's just the odds.

If you don't do something to bias the outcomes against you... things will probably get more average.

If you do something to bias outcomes toward you they -could- become a lot better.

[niyad]

60. (((((siwsan))))) oh my word, you have certainly been having a difficult time. wish there were

something I could do to help besides sending good thoughts and prayers that things turn around for you very soon.


(wish I could send you the real thing)

[LiberalAndProud]

61. You are amazing Siwsan.

Even while venting about all of your recent excruciating heartache, you accentuated the positive pieces in your life. Your brother is a dear. Your cousin brings you comfort and is generous to a fault. Your mechanic thinks on his feet, having found himself short of a handkerchief when you needed one. And in the middle of all the tears, you found humor.

Not only are you surviving, you are thriving. You really are amazing.

[greatlaurel]

62. Oh my goodness, when it rains it pours. Hang in there.

[sabrina 1]

63. I think you need a heart!