White people need to stop saying or thinking they have experienced racism
I say this as a woman of Scandinavian/Mexican descent - I am very light skinned so I have benefited greatly from white privilege. I am not proud of it, but I cannot deny it. I hadn't realized just how much until probably the last 20 years or so and I am still embarrassed by it.
We will never, ever understand or experience racism the way black people have in this country. Even if we did one of those undercover things where we are black for a day with a hidden camera - you still have the knowledge at the end of the day you can be white again.
Because it isn't how people treat you for that one day that makes you go "oooh so this is racism" - it is a whole lifetime of little and huge experiences that influence your thought process every waking moment. It is the result of being bombarded by negative depictions in the media, micro-aggressions and blatant hostility.
I have one small example - I was out shopping at a small clothing store. When I walked in (I was the only one there at the time) I was greeted warmly by the sales staff and asked if I needed help. A few moments later two black women walked in (making it a total of 3 people in this small store - so not like it was super busy), I turned to look - because the little bell over the door went off and it is just a reaction for me to look - so I got to witness how they were greeted. They weren't. I did see some eye rolls from the (white) sales staff and some hushed whispering and pointing. And then watched as they were followed through the store (under the guise of arranging clothing that always happened to be right next to where the women were) - it was so obvious but I was still shocked. The staff never talked or greeted the two women - just glared at them.
These women were better dressed and way better made up (nice make-up, great hair) than me - I looked like a schlub in old jeans and frizzy hair, but they were treated like they were a gang of thieves.
I didn't know what to do - I am ashamed to admit. I left the store and called the corporate office and made a complaint when I got home. I wish I had said something to the saleswomen, but I was just shaking with anger. And I realized - this must happen to these women every fricking day. Because the first time it registered to me I was pissed as hell. I mean I have seen flat out racism when I lived in Louisiana (briefly, I was just a kid so I don't remember much) and being from Northern Minnesota you don't have much opportunity to see anyone who isn't white, much less see interactions. But now I was in the big city (Minneapolis/St Paul) and this just opened my eyes.
I realized that everyday these women had to pick their battles and some ignorant salsewomen weren't worth their time. And I cannot imagine experiencing that subtle racism (ok the staff weren't that subtle) every fricking day. Just watching it once made me ready to smack them - how can anyone face the day knowing that they are going to be treated differently for no other reason but the color of their skin and not be pissed constantly?
Those two years I was in Louisiana as a kid, I was one of 5 white kids in my class. Trust me, there was no "reverse" racism - not by my fellow black students or by my black teachers. My mom was told that there were ways to get around me going to my neighborhood school for nice (ie white) people like us - she said no my kid would go to the school in her neighborhood. My mom (a young woman from small town Minnesota) had no concept of the racial tension in the south. She just didn't want me to have special treatment and wasn't really understanding why she should bus me an hour away - well not until she was called a n* lover.
I had no fear of going into a class where I was the minority because I was never taught fear because of my skin color. But if it had been reversed - if I was one of 5 black kids in my class, I am pretty sure I would be scared on some level every day. That shapes who you are as a person - that constant being on guard has to become an automatic defense mechanism so you can just get through each day.
So yes, sometimes white people have had some negative experiences - what they refer to as "reverse" racism, but it isn't the same. Because for you it is an experience not a lifelong reality. To deny that white privilege exists is not just ignoring reality but insulting to every person of color.
Sorry for the long meandering rant
= new reply since forum marked as read
Sort of... While kissing my African-American girlfriend in the park. At first I wasn't sure, but I was kind of wondering why someone on the other side of the park, over a hundred feet away, would be harassing us. I thought, really? Racism, in this time, in this liberal part of the country? Can't be! Then my girlfriend said "Don't worry, we won't get that very often."
Too bad some may misinterpret your thread title as "telling people what they can say/think" - I understand the spirit in which you intended your title. 