Welcome to DU! The truly grassroots left-of-center political community where regular people, not algorithms, drive the discussions and set the standards. Join the community: Create a free account Support DU (and get rid of ads!): Become a Star Member Latest Breaking News General Discussion The DU Lounge All Forums Issue Forums Culture Forums Alliance Forums Region Forums Support Forums Help & Search

LiberalArkie

(15,715 posts)
Wed Apr 22, 2015, 09:52 AM Apr 2015

A Dog Caused Chaos in Scotland After Driving a Tractor on a Highway

http://www.vice.com/read/a-dog-has-caused-chaos-in-scotland-after-driving-a-tractor-on-a-motorway-901

Incredibly, there was an appropriate stock image to go with this story. Photo via Flickr user Chris Breeze



Delays were caused on a stretch of busy Scottish motorway after a dog took control of a tractor and drove it into the road. Feels very biblical, this, doesn't it? As though the dogs are finally realizing their destiny by rising up, claiming our heavy machinery as their own, and decking it cheerfully into a big row of Peugeots. I, for one, welcome our new dog overlords, and the reign of turd-ridden streets and terror that they will inevitably bring.

As the BBC reports, the incident was reported by Traffic Scotland this morning with a tweet saying: "M74 (N) J13-RTC due to dog taking control of tractor... nope, not joking. Farmer and police at scene, vehicle in central res."

After the dog was pulled over and asked to please stop driving a tractor down a motorway, Traffic Scotland added: "M74 (N) at J13 – Route is clear from earlier incident and dog is fine. Has to be the weirdest thing we have ever reported! No delays in area."

Snip
16 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
A Dog Caused Chaos in Scotland After Driving a Tractor on a Highway (Original Post) LiberalArkie Apr 2015 OP
Epic! And it sadly reminds me of poor deceased Tiger the Kitty riding on the lawn mower KittyWampus Apr 2015 #1
The writer on that piece is very good! KittyWampus Apr 2015 #2
what a writer!!! I don't know whether to laugh... BlancheSplanchnik Apr 2015 #4
-carriageway- KittyWampus Apr 2015 #5
carriageway. Right, then. BlancheSplanchnik Apr 2015 #7
It's Dog eat Dog out there Sherman A1 Apr 2015 #3
Probably a Border Collie LiberalEsto Apr 2015 #6
You'd be correct justiceischeap Apr 2015 #11
How canny! Lars39 Apr 2015 #8
Arf arf shenmue Apr 2015 #9
This message was self-deleted by its author corkhead Apr 2015 #10
Silly Scots. Only cats can drive. KamaAina Apr 2015 #12
Beat me to it~ hifiguy Apr 2015 #14
Oh boy it's Toonces. Watch out Toonces...Toonces..TOONCES !!! Nooooooo!!!! BlueJazz Apr 2015 #15
Aw, who's a good doggie? joeybee12 Apr 2015 #13
Bad dog! cloudbase Apr 2015 #16
 

KittyWampus

(55,894 posts)
1. Epic! And it sadly reminds me of poor deceased Tiger the Kitty riding on the lawn mower
Wed Apr 22, 2015, 09:54 AM
Apr 2015

as "Protector" with his elderly owner.

 

KittyWampus

(55,894 posts)
2. The writer on that piece is very good!
Wed Apr 22, 2015, 09:56 AM
Apr 2015

Police joined the dog's human master—who it's thought is being earmarked for mercy in the upcoming dogpocalypse—in huddling around the central reservation where the tractor ended up and just being really Scottishly confused about the whole thing. It's thought the dog leaned on the tractor controls at some point while the farmer was out of the vehicle, or at least that's the story, anyway. In reality, the dog probably hypnotized the farmer with a loving look and then, as thousands of years of evolution came to a natural conclusion, clasped its paws in the vague approximation of opposable thumbs, smoothly changed gear, and then took off towards the M74, with joy in its tiny dog heart and the sun on its back.

What mysteries lie inside the gem-like mind of a dog? Dogs are innocent and they are wise. Dogs enjoy small tins of bad meat and being told they are good. They like walking and turning their necks awkwardly and excitedly to look at humans. They like panting and naps. They, apparently, like driving without a license and taking prohibited vehicles onto and across British carriageways. The mind of a dog is a precious diamond that it is impossible to mine. It contains magnitudes, all of them untold. What tiny spark of naïve genius inspired a Scottish dog to drive a tractor into a motorway? We may never know.

But sometimes, in life, I think we all feel like a dog driving a tractor down a busy stretch of Scottish motorway. We don't know what's happening or why, but we're behind the wheel and we're fucking motoring. Our happiness is both infectious and full of extreme and lethal possibility. We don't know how we got here but we're enjoying the ride. Thank you, Scottish Motorway Dog. Thank you for showing us that life is full of possibility and wonder. Thank you for teaching us that a single moment of vivid joy can make our day anew. Thank you for not killing us with a tractor while you were on your rampage.

BlancheSplanchnik

(20,219 posts)
4. what a writer!!! I don't know whether to laugh...
Wed Apr 22, 2015, 10:09 AM
Apr 2015

Or give a standing ovation! That was outstanding.

Out, standing in the middle of a Scottish motorway. On a tractor.

BlancheSplanchnik

(20,219 posts)
7. carriageway. Right, then.
Wed Apr 22, 2015, 10:32 AM
Apr 2015

OK. I forget it's there, cuz you can't see the fun stuff on mobile. I was tempted to change it...... Temporarily, anyway.

Response to LiberalArkie (Original post)

Latest Discussions»General Discussion»A Dog Caused Chaos in Sco...