"I Made A Huge Sacrifice To Buy My Dream Home"

[KamaAina]

Not The Onion!

http://www.elledecor.com/life-culture/a7367/i-made-a-huge-sacrifice-to-buy-my-home/

My husband and I purchased our dream home entirely on our own. Money wasn't gifted for our down payment nor did we expect that. There is a certain sense of pride that comes with saving up, living off canned food for an entire year, buying consignment instead of new, and then making your dreams a reality without any handouts. By our early thirties, we were able to sell our first starter home, to build the fully-loaded luxury home of our dreams.

With that said, certain sacrifices had to be made for this dream to come true for us. The first being that we can only afford to have two children. We are able to afford one family vacation a year (using a timeshare that we purchased in full as newlyweds). We kept to a budget for other large expenses that came with our latest move like a ride-on lawnmower, gardening supplies, a fenced in yard for our dogs, and a generator. Our happy children have everything they need (not everything they want) and I am able to stay home with them while they are young because of the carefully premeditated financial choices we have made. None of this just happens. We prioritize, stick to our plans, and are teaching our young children about self-control by living as their example.

However, our story comes with a deeply rooted secret. We weren't planning on this change of heart when we purchased our home but we would like to have one more child. My uterus literally aches despite the fact that logic suggests we can't afford it right now. After talking it over, and trying to adjust the budget, we have come to the conclusion that the decision to buy our dream home last year has eliminated the possibility of having any more children. Unless circumstances suddenly change, in order to have one more child, we would need to downsize. This would mean another move and tearing our two kids away from the house they now call a home. And it would mean that I would need to return to work full-time, taking away from the quality time our two children enjoy having with me and putting them (and the hypothetical third child) in daycare which my teaching salary would probably just barely afford. Our annual vacation would disappear because we would need to sell the timeshare to make up the difference.

Understandably, something has to give and unfortunately, in this case, it's our mutual dream of having another child. My husband is able to accept this, I am not, and to be honest, this has caused some heartache. I have begun to resent the dream house and our decision to buy it. It's a strange mourning process I can't really discuss openly with others, mainly because people our age often don't plan as meticulously as we do. I certainly don't expect others to understand and I am beginning to move past it, but then a beautiful newborn is set in my arms and I have to start the process all over again. Sometimes, I can see us living in a smaller, older home somewhere, selling this one, and adjusting to accommodate life with a third child in a home that is definitely anything but a dream, but then I overhear our boys having a blast playing in our big, beautiful, safe backyard, or listen to their laughter billowing out of the colorful playroom space we have created and designed just for them, and I know this was always meant to be our forever home. This is the American dream and we are in it, living it, every day, just the four of us.

Got privilege?

[randys1]

1. Consignment instead of new? yes, much privilege

[cyberswede]

2. I guess I would avoid being so strictly tied to any plan...

...they should cross their fingers that the birth control doesn't fail.

[Orsino]

3. I won't judge, but...

...it may be that her "ache" isn't really for a third child?

[geek tragedy]

4. Seems like the real problem is that she wants another kid and he doesn't nt

[Gormy Cuss]

5. The comments are priceless. n/t

[olddots]

6. the word "gifted " stopped me from reading the article

[Nye Bevan]

7. A third child isn't *that* expensive, surely?

You already have a crib, car seats, high chairs, etc. and can reuse them. As well as hand-me-down clothes. The car you have already is probably big enough. And it's not like the grocery bill is going to go up by a huge amount, proportionately. I concur with those that suspect that this is really about something else.

[Hangingon]

21. Savings for college

[karynnj]

64. Agree - as one who had three

The only big costs I can think of are 1) medical, which should be for the most part covered by insurance - at least for group plans family of 5 is charged the same premium as a party of 4, but depending on how good the insurance is this could be a cost and 2) it may be that she anticipated going back to teaching when the second child started full day school. (As a teacher, I assume this would just mean a short time in before school and after school programs assuming her town has them.)

Someone mentioned college costs, but she refers to going back to teaching. It seems that the full cost of the house and living is 100% covered with little extra just from her husband's salary, when the kids are all in full day school, she could return to work and dedicate all her earnings to a college fund and any extra taxes.

I know some will criticize, but this story does not hang together. Not to mention - an ache in your uterus?? - I could see heart when you see someone else's baby, but uterus? I know of no one who yearns for the pregnancy, just the resultant baby. As to living on canned foods -- they could have eaten frugally and not eaten exclusively canned goods. (In fact, it might be less expensive. )

[REP]

8. Only one vacation? Only one working spouse? Poor thing!

[MissMillie]

15. +1

Sorry, not a lot of sympathy.

I haven't taken a trip away from home since 1994.

[taught_me_patience]

35. Is that excessive? Why are you mocking that?

Seems like a normal middle class lifestyle. It might be a little more prosperous than the average middle class, but nothing excessive. Is this what DU has become? Mock those who are financially a little above average?

[riderinthestorm]

44. "Fully loaded luxury house" isn't just "a little above average"

Owning a timeshare also isn't typical for any young thirty something family of four either as far as I know....

The author of the article has opened herself up to critique. She could downsize to a less "fully loaded luxury house" to afford a third child, or sell the time share and go camping (or any of the other numerous suggestions).

In reality it appears she has problems in her marriage she's not willing to face and has penned a "poor me" letter despite her privilege.

She's justifiably getting called out on it.

[REP]

50. Did you read her whining, puling essay?

Her uterus literally aches for another baby! But she doesn't want to eat canned food, shop consignment, give up her vacation time share, work, get a smaller house, talk to her husband ... I'm mocking her "poooooooor me" drivel when she clearly has more than many.

[procon]

83. People in my own family have NEVER had a real vacation.

They are average, working class families that own modest homes with both parents working. Money is always tight and beyond legal holidays, they have never had more than the occasional 3 day weekend getaway when their schedules matched.

I don't see that anyone is mocking someone else's good fortune in attaining success, but there is ample reason to criticize the stunning chutzpah of this shallow, self-centered woman who takes her privileged, indulgent life for granted and complains when she can't decide what's more important... another kid, or her materialistic acquisitions.

[taught_me_patience]

86. Having a vacation is now considered "priviledge" and "indulgent"

I guess? Wow, I didn't know the bar is set so low.

[procon]

89. What a great take away...

Seriously, if that was the best retort you could think of, why even bother? This single-handed defense of the privileged few is coming up short on so many levels, but the only thing you can gripe about is a "vacation"; epic fail, yeah?

[yellowcanine]

92. I think the point is she has it pretty good and is whining publicly about it.

If she has to whine and kvetch about it, at least do it with a counselor or a pastor. Besides, only in America is someone going to have the nerve to post something like this. Does she have any idea about the real struggles which many parents have in many parts of the world? Think of someone besides yourself already.

[KittyWampus]

39. This comment reminds me of people attacking Union workers and their benefits-

why should THEY have benefits when -I- don't.

Rather than saying… we should all have benefits.

[Fred Sanders]

82. Democrats falling into the same trap the conservative do...Envy. Stop it, I say.

The Party Tent must exclude a middle class, senior...teacher??

Isn't mocking the salary and benefits of a senior teacher a con thing?

We have a big tent, I would like to keep the salaried teacher entrance open and welcoming.

[mnhtnbb]

9. This is about not understanding there ARE limits.

Choices have costs and mourning is always part of the process when one gives up
something in order to have something else.

[B2G]

10. Isn't that exactly what she's saying? nt

[mnhtnbb]

11. She's boo-hooing as though she hadn't known.

She made a choice. She needs to get over herself that in spite of being such a "wonderful
planner", she can't afford another kid AND keep her fancy house.

[Fred Sanders]

73. Yes, but isn't she mourning that decision to choose material goods over having a third child?

I think a lot of folks have not read the article or reflected much on it's meaning.

[yeoman6987]

12. True. I like that they are responsible

That isn't appreciated today much. I think they could find a way to make it work and hopefully they do. She claims to be a teacher so perhaps tutoring may help with the added expenses.

[Igel]

13. But there's a larger point.

It's a trade-off: kids, job, living standard.

"My kids" run the gamut. But the general rule of thumb is that if you're a teenager and your family's poor your parents are young; if your parents are old, you're likely to be fairly well off. (There are exceptions for accidents and last children.)

Where my own kid started school people assumed his mother was his grandmother. "Oh, so you're Igeling's grandmother!" "No, I'm his mother." The PhD and post-doc sort of got in the way of starting the family. For others, getting established at work takes priority over having kids. We should have had a second child, to be honest ... but only in hindsight.

The stats are relevant, it's not just anecdotes. Higher education, career, late first birth, higher overall income, greater home ownership and the house that's owned appreciates faster are all strongly correlated. Lower education, low-skilled job, earlier first birth, lower overall income, and rent--or, if you have a house, it's not going to appreciate very much. The graphs these stats produce are despondency-inducing.

Trying to disentangle all the causes and effects is difficult. The first set--"higher education, career ..."--plausibly has cause-and-effect that's fairly obvious. For lower education folk it's more of a knot, with a lot of families started that make finishing college difficult, or they start fairly low-skill jobs and can't break free of the income trap they fall into. It's more the case that cause and effect are probably pretty clear, but it varies so much by person that it's a set of causal relationships with a variety of first steps that leads to not so wealthy outcomes. It makes it a tough nut to crack; and in some circles it's a nut that can't be mentioned, because it implies that there are choices to be made that lead to bad outcomes. This is a no-no. (In some cases, lack of chasing wealth is just a repudiation of the very idea that you need a lot of wealth to be happy; there's a lower bound for this, but it's not a real high lower bound.)

In some cases it's the parents--I've seen some kids whose parents could damned well afford to let the kid stay at home while the kid works to put himself through community college, but the parents insist on rent or the kid's moving out (never, by the way, parents with college educations).

I'd note another bit of research from last fall or winter. It looked at cortisol levels as a measure of stress. (Usually the research goes like this: high cortisol levels = stress. Poverty = high cortisol levels. Therefore income is a proxy for stress, and we can measure stress by measuring income. Catch the flaws? 1. Income at all incomes is a valid proxy for stress; 2. Only income levels produce stress. 3. Stress from one cause is physiologically distinct from stress from a second cause.)

It found that teens in very poor families have a high level of stress. After a surprisingly low income threshold is met--still well under the poverty threshold--the stress mostly levels out. At another still surprisingly low income level it does level out. That teen in a 4-person family making $30k/year has the same cortisol levels as a teen in a 4-person family making $300k/year. The stresses are from different causes, but the physiological effect of cortisol on learning is, well, the physiological effect of cortisol on learning. (And with the deft identification of a logical flaw, hundreds of education articles are suddenly rendered into low-quality toilet paper.)

The anecdotal version is always, "My stress is real and important; yours, not so much."

[pnwmom]

25. Thank you for your contribution to the discussion.

You make a lot of thoughtful points.

[Fred Sanders]

74. Thank you for making the compliment to the poster. I second your emotion; compliments are too rare when deserved.

[alarimer]

14. I would rather spend money on experiences than on things.

And that includes a house. It sounds like these people actually bought (or built, rather) more than they could actually afford.

A house is just a fucking place to store your stuff. It is not more important than spending time with people you care about, than having amazing experiences. It is a prison if you are sacrificing so much just to pay for it.

[a la izquierda]

72. Agreed.

I'd rather see the world than drive a swanky car or buy a ridiculously huge house.

[Arugula Latte]

16. Bwa ha ha! This insufferable woman is getting her ass handed to her in the comments.

I can relate to this. My wife and I are upset. I sold off one of my Lear leases, why? So she could buy our third vacation home. I have come to resent her for this. My scotch decanter on the old Lear rattles on takeoff, and to be honest, I wasn't quite ready for that level of personal sacrifice at the age of 31. Sure it is our dream third vacation home, and who doesn't want it to be perfect, at 19,000 square feet it's a little small, but the things we do for love.....

Reply: Oh Darlin' my heart aches for you as you must have a 2013 model Lear with the faulty corner brace on the wet bar. Please trade it in immediately as they have fixed that GLARING defect.

[pinboy3niner]

18. They should have headlined it: "My Dream House Ate My Baby!"

[Phentex]

54. I don't want to laugh I swear...

I should put you on ignore cause

[Mojorabbit]

68. I was really trying to come from a compassionate place

for the person who wrote the letter but your post cracked me up!

[peace13]

76. I'm in...

LMAO! Thank you!

[leftstreet]

23. LOL

[taught_me_patience]

28. Why the judgemental attitude?

Seems like a typical middle class problem... the cost of daycare for children can be overwhelming force tough decisions. The tolerance for other middle class people here is pathetic.

[B2G]

30. And we're going to want their votes next year,

while we mock them in our own little echo chamber.

I'm about done with the hypocrisy here. Religion gets mocked until Obama sings Amazing Grace. Cops are all cold blooded killers until one of them dances at a Gay Pride event. Middle class folks who happen to have a bit more than others are demonized and disdained.
I thought we were tolerant. I thought we were a big tent.

I used to think a lot of things.

[Erich Bloodaxe BSN]

52. Dems have been too big of a tent.

Or at least they've invited the wrong people into the tent. Too many embarrassed to call themselves Republicans types invited in, while the poor and struggling were kicked out to avoid offending their sensibilities.

[Arugula Latte]

42. Middle class? I don't think so!

They can afford their giant Barbie Dream House on one income. Why? Because they ate canned food -- FOR A WHOLE YEAR!

They are a rich family who are patting themselves on the back for achieving what used to be in reach for the middle class but no longer is.

And here she is whining and carping about how unfortunate it is that they can't have both their perfect house and another kid! Oh, the humanity!

She doesn't want to sacrifice her timeshare! Oh, God, no, anything but that!

Meanwhile, in the great chunk of America, people are working three crappy jobs and still can't afford to pay the rent, let alone a mortgage. Another issue, a lot of women can't have any kids. Zip. Nada. ... And her poor uterus "aches."

She seems to have absolutely no awareness of the problems true middle class people face, let alone poor people. She'd probably blame the poor people for not "sacrificing" enough. Did they really need that one pair of shoes from the thrift store? I mean, come on. She ate canned food so her boys could have a play "space."

Read the comments. This is not a DU-liberal-elitist view of this whiny, cringe-inducing pity piece. Pretty much everybody is having the same reaction.

[Major Nikon]

56. You obviously don't understand

Unless one lives in a cardboard box under the overpass, expressing woe is a function of privilege.

[taught_me_patience]

17. She should just wait a couple years and finances will improve dramtically

Husbands income will probably rise. Kids will be old enough to go to school and no longer have to be in daycare. Then she could also go back to work and easily pay for daycare for the third kid.

I just don't understand what is so bad about daycare that prevents mothers from going back to work. I have two kids that are in daycare and doing great. That's the way life is these days.

[bettyellen]

67. Or he could get laid off. You make plans and shit happens....

Including not liking the plan you originally had.

[riderinthestorm]

19. "Huge sacrifice" is eating canned food for a year and buying consignment?

(Worlds tiniest violin)...

[daredtowork]

20. Wow they have no idea how the other half lives

I'm playing my tiny violin for her sacrifices.

Note the self-control and handout dog whistles: they think other folks are given houses by Big Government while Stay At Home Mom has earned her Time Share Vacations.

[pnwmom]

22. It's so easy to judge, isn't it? Especially when you have no idea what day care would cost

for an infant and two other children. We're talking a few thousand dollars -- per month -- if you're in a major city. And she's a school teacher. It's not surprising that they can't squeeze this kind of cost into their monthly budget.

So here she is, writing in a "decor" magazine to warn other women that they might one day regret a choice to go for the bigger, fancier house instead of leaving space in their budgets -- and their lives -- for another child.

Now that they're settled into the "dream" house, it's much harder to leave it than if they'd never left their smaller home in the first place. If I were her friend, I'd tell her to sell the house -- her kids will be happy wherever she's happy. But she and her husband have decided to live with their original decision. So be it.

P.S. My daughter and her husband went to an accountant when they were setting up their wills and guardianship for their daughter. He told my daughter that she should really quit her job, since after taxes she's losing money by working. She's kept her job because she's in it for the long haul, but this is the situation for many women. Staying at home isn't always a privilege; sometimes it's a practical decision. If you live in an expensive area, day care for one child can wipe out the second salary.

P.P.S. This is what the Koch brothers want the 99% to do -- to resent each other instead of seeing who really represents privilege in this country. It's not the school teacher and her husband who can't afford a third child because they went overboard buying a house.

[B2G]

24. But judging other people's lives is what we do!

We're 'tolerant' that way.

[leftstreet]

26. Maybe they should open a daycare. Make a fortune

Since they're such a bootstrappy couple

For most people struggling to feed, shelter and cloth ONE kid, this just smacks of outright stupidity. Want another kid? Sell the fucking house and stop whining

[pnwmom]

29. The Koch brothers have succeeded. They've gotten people like you to blame "privileged" schoolteachers

instead of focusing like a laser on the 1%.

[leftstreet]

31. The twit is blaming people who don't sacrifice enough

She could make her case for the insecurities all people face without the preachy moralizing about sacrifice and suffering. Sounds to me like something the Koch brothers would HIRE someone to say

If the story's even true, thank godz she's not actually teaching and influencing young people with her hateful anti-working class rhetoric

[pnwmom]

37. No, she's not. She's pointing out that all their careful planning didn't leave space

in their hearts and budgets for another child. If she'd had the chance for a do over, she would have stayed in the first house till they'd had another child.

There's nothing hateful or anti-working class in her piece. This is about her life, not yours.

[taught_me_patience]

36. +1 n/t

[SoCalDem]

45. I stayed home until our youngest was in 1st grade

It was not all fun and games, but we figured that after daycare, I would have netted about $100 a month, and it was just not worth the hassle of dragging 3 sleeping kids out of bed every morning, and schlepping them to a sitter, so I could sit at a desk somewhere...

I never regretted it..and we did have a very small house, one raggedy car and we rarely ever went anywhere..but for us it worked..and we needed the flexibility to take our oldest son back and forth to Mayo Clinic several times a year..so a job was pretty much put of the question.

I am SO glad those days are behind us..

Life is a series of trade-offs

[pnwmom]

46. I'm glad things have gotten easier for you

and I hope things are better with your son. There's nothing worse than worrying about a child. I know.

[Erich Bloodaxe BSN]

51. I think though, that

she might not be part of 'each other'. Based on the article, they sound like 1%ers, or at least pretty darn close. Maybe 2 or 3%ers at best.

I think that's why the lack of much sympathy here. She's not talking about having to walk everywhere simply to keep a roof over her and her spouse's head, not being able to afford any kids period. No, sounds like at roughly 30, she's already in her fully loaded dream house, something the majority of the population will never have even in their 90s.

Maybe she doesn't deserve all of the mockery she's getting, but she comes off as a person moaning about the fact that her shoes are out of style to the guy with no legs.

[pnwmom]

53. She was a school teacher and they can't afford the house if she works

because of the cost of daycare. That doesn't sound like the 1% to me.

It all probably depends on where they live. For example, $300K house is a dream house in some places, and a starter in others.

[Erich Bloodaxe BSN]

57. She must work in a school that pays extremely well.

Their 'fully loaded luxury dream home' comes with enough land to need a riding lawnmower, and they bought their timeshare outright as newlyweds.

And if you can set aside 300k by scrimping on meals for a year, you're making more than the President of the United States does.

[pnwmom]

60. Who said she set aside $300K? Didn't she get a mortgage? n/t

[taught_me_patience]

65. They set aside money for a starter home, which they sold for their "dream home"

which they also probably have a mortgage on. That's how it's done... save up for a starter home, plan, save, then sell and move up to a larger home. This is completely typical of a middle class life.

[TwilightGardener]

27. Meh. Let us know when you have a real problem.

Life is full of tradeoffs and regrets. Suck it up.

[Bonx]

32. I don't understand the 'got privilege ?' comment.

[KamaAina]

34. These people are living large by the standards of most Americans.

[pnwmom]

38. Because they got over in their heads trying to buy a special house? That makes them like an awful lot of Americans.

And she's trying to warn them that there could be a price to pay, beyond the price that can be paid in dollars.

[Bonx]

41. Ok. What does that have to do with privilege ?

The couple as described could easily be my boss & his wife.

[lumberjack_jeff]

66. The idea that "sacrifice" i.e. making choices - is some kind of tragedy and atypical. n/t

[DonCoquixote]

71. the idea is

for most of us, we sacrifice and do not even get ahead. The old cult of living lean and working hard is dying, because the rich are taking more money to ensure that their kids never have to do either.

[Solly Mack]

33. I got nothing.

[KG]

40. My uterus literally aches...

[Skittles]

63. that's the part where I bailed

yes indeed

[peace13]

77. ACA to the rescue!

Could be a medical problem. : )

[Oneironaut]

43. Usual swarm of internet bullies in the comments.

Article comments section - Yes, we get that you think she's clueless, and maybe she is. Does that make your outbursts any more justified? Maybe your posts are motivated a little bit by jealousy?

I don't like this new form of "social activism." It's nothing of the sort. If you're so concerned about rich people, go volunteer at a food pantry. Bullying people on the Internet just makes you a jerk...

[closeupready]

47. Wait. Am I the only one here who read the whole op-ed?

I have begun to resent the dream house and our decision to buy it. It's a strange mourning process I can't really discuss openly with others, mainly because people our age often don't plan as meticulously as we do. I certainly don't expect others to understand and I am beginning to move past it, but then a beautiful newborn is set in my arms and I have to start the process all over again.

(Underlining mine.)

[Erich Bloodaxe BSN]

55. Didn't read the whole thing, but read that part.

Sounded like just more 'we're special' boasting. WE were so great and meticulous that we were able to afford the ultramegadeluxe house after only scrimping for one year, something all the peasants are too stupid to do. And of course they're all too thick to understand how much we need a third child in a world that's already extremely overpopulated...

[Arugula Latte]

69. She's so proud of her hard work ... of marrying a guy who makes big $$$.

[Fred Sanders]

75. "Uterus" is not a dirty word. It was used awkwardly, perhaps. Perhaps it was used experimentally?

[laundry_queen]

81. That saying is used quite often

on some parenting sites. At least it was a decade ago when I was on those sites. We would say that if we saw a cute newborn or something. "Oh, that picture makes my uterus ache". It was quite common.

[Erich Bloodaxe BSN]

84. I don't know.

I didn't mention the use of the word 'uterus' in my comment. Did you reply to the wrong comment?

[vankuria]

48. Alot of people would love to have her problems!

Timeshare, annual vacation, dream home, stay at home mom, 2 healthy kids, wants 3rd child but not sure she can afford it, etc. Doesn't sound so bad to me or I'm sure a lot of people just barely able to make rent, with fertility problems, all alone, or working crappy jobs for minimum wages, etc.

Some people would never be happy no matter what wonderful things they have to appreciate. For some the glass is always half empty and I wonder for this lady if a 3rd child would really make her a happy.

[cbdo2007]

49. Lol....Sounds like she is a terrible planner.

I'm sure she's more well off than my wife and I and we have our third kid on the way in December. We can't wait and we have plenty of love to give! Luckily that's pretty much all the kid will need.

[valerief]

58. When life doesn't give you problems, you have to invent them. nt

[Godhumor]

59. Not a big fan of the language choices, but I get the author's point

They decided on what kind of lifestyle they wanted, figured out how to achieve it and were happy. Time moved on and they wanted to add something new, but, to do so, something else...or a lot of somethings would have to change. So now it is a choice between keeping the lifestyle or adding a kid and making compromises. Her language choices were terrible and very patting-her-own-backish, but I still see what she was trying to get at.

For the record, my wife and I made a similar choice with regards to a second child vs keeping our current house and allowing my wife the choice to stay home. We decided to keep our current setup.

[freeplessinseattle]

61. If her uterus is literally aching, her ultra logical mind should get thee to a dr. eom

[BlueJazz]

62. I'm an atheist but Dear Miss God: Thank you, thank you for giving me the sense to not even date..

...somebody like THAT woman.

[DonCoquixote]

70. some will read

and think this woman is clueless, which she IS, but there is a bigger point that can and should be had.

namely, don't try to play the upwardly mobile game.. It was rigged before, and even more so now, so that the one percent can keep you running, chasing illusions.

I am also, sorry to say, glad she is not raising a kid in this mess. Said kid would come in right at the point where overstretched budgets and frayed marriages could ensure the dream home is anything BUT.

[Phentex]

88. I think you're right. Many families are trying to keep up with the neighbors...

and that is their dream. But it's a house of cards for some.

[6chars]

78. Imagine what a great house she could have

if she hadn't of had the two kids she did have. (joking)

Not that I think everyone should be having large families, but this does not compute - I am sure they could afford a third child, just not send them to Swarthmore.

[Ms. Yertle]

79. Setting goals

and sticking to a plan to achieve them is "privilege?" Who knew?

[abelenkpe]

80. She's got a dream house, two kids and vacations every year on one salary

but is upset because she wants more. Cry me a river. Wish we could afford a home and vacation. Seriously, does she not understand how lucky she is? Those on this thread who don't understand how this is a privileged life are blind to the fact that for most this is entirely out of reach today.

[Phentex]

85. The target audience are the readers of Elle Decor magazine. This is a fluff piece

that they may relate to. The people who don't read it? not so much.

[Vinca]

87. She sounds like the kind of self-absorbed person who would fall apart if her well-planned life

was thrown a curve ball like a job loss, serious illness, divorce or - horror of horrors - the dream house is found to have radon or black mold.

[yellowcanine]

90. Let me get this straight. She has two healthy kids, a nice house, a time-share vacation house, a

whole bunch of stuff, including a generator! and she is whining about having to give up the idea of having a third child? Because they can't afford it? Words fail, they really do. So much so that I wonder if it isn't all made up just to stir people up.

Assuming it is real, I would recommend a trip for this woman to some place like, say Mozambique. There she can drive down the road and see women and little kids hauling water on their heads for basic household use EVERY frikken day. Hell, I would pay for her ticket.

[KamaAina]

91. But her timeshare isn't in Mozambique.

[yellowcanine]

93. Yes. Pity.