You're only Trump once. . . Please come CAPTION the Donald!!!

[skip fox]

Donald (the most expensive hair money can buy) Trump is saying: "Listen, it isn't often that I'm stumped. . . . But my wife asked me last year who I would want to be if I wasn't my own 'magnificent self.' . . . . Well, I'm still thinking about that one."

[R. P. McMurphy]

1. These are my emergency blinders for when . . .

I'm confronted by unexpected facts!

[Laf.La.Dem.]

2. I am the only true "family values" guy!

You can ask my first wife, or second wife, or my current wife

[skip fox]

3. "Be quiet. . . . I'm looking into the future!

What do it see? . . . Hmmm. . . . What could it be? . . . It's coming into focus! . . . Do I see . . . ? What is it? . . . . Ah hah, it's ME!!!"

[randome]

4. "I will clone myself and be my own running mate. I can't...I can't explain my own awesomeness!"

[hr][font color="blue"][center]Stop looking for heroes. BE one.[/center][/font][hr]

[skip fox]

5. "Not many people know it, but in my hair is a powerful antenna

and I get to hear alien broadcasts. . . . Yep, just like usual, they're talking about me!"

[KamaAina]

6. That looks like Johnny Carson's Carnac the Magnificent pose

"A rump, a chump, and a Trump."

Ed McMahon: "A rump, a chump, and a Trump!"

(envelope opens)

"Who is leading the polls in the Republican primary race?"

[11 Bravo]

7. OWW! Those butt plugs that look like me are PAINFUL!

[Jamaal510]

8. "I'll use my telekinesis on you

for getting offended by what I say."

[Hepburn]

9. I'm really not concerned...it's my hemorrhoids. n/t