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Playinghardball

(11,665 posts)
Fri Mar 4, 2016, 04:15 PM Mar 2016

How about a joke for Friday?

A Fast Thinker

A man in a Florida supermarket tried to buy half a head of lettuce.

The very young produce assistant told him that they sell only whole heads of lettuce.

The man persisted and asked to see the manager. The boy said he'd ask his manager about it. Walking into the back room, the boy said to his manager: 'Some asshole wants to buy half a head of lettuce. As he finished his sentence, he turned to find the man standing right behind him, so he added, 'And this gentleman has kindly offered to buy the other half.'

The manager approved the deal, and the man went on his way.

Later the manager said to the boy, 'I was impressed with the way you got yourself out of that situation earlier. We like people who think on their feet here. Where are you from, son?'

Canada, sir,' the boy replied.
Well, why did you leave Canada?' the manager asked.

The boy said, 'Sir, there's nothing but whores and hockey players up there.'
Really?' said the manager. 'My wife is from Canada.'
No shit?' replied the boy. 'Who'd she play for?'

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How about a joke for Friday? (Original Post) Playinghardball Mar 2016 OP
Heehee! Will share it with my golf buddies this weekend. brush Mar 2016 #1
Good joke.... dixiegrrrrl Mar 2016 #2
... In_The_Wind Mar 2016 #3
my joke... Takket Mar 2016 #4
BRAWHAHAHAAAAA Playinghardball Mar 2016 #6
Ha ha bigwillq Mar 2016 #5
LOL, that's funny! DawgHouse Mar 2016 #7

Takket

(21,573 posts)
4. my joke...
Fri Mar 4, 2016, 04:43 PM
Mar 2016

A teabagger and a Progressive are standing in front of a pile of 100 cookies, trying to figure out how to divide them. A 1%er walks into the room and scoops 99 of the cookies into a bag. As he's walking out of the room, he whispers in the teabagger's ear.

"Watch out for the bleeding heart liberal. He wants to take your half of the cookie and give it to someone on welfare".

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