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Tab

(11,093 posts)
Thu Apr 14, 2016, 07:28 PM Apr 2016

Hokay.... "Smart Mattress Alerts You When It Detects It's Being Used By A Stranger"

This is bound to end infidelity once and for all

Technology watchdog @internetofshit brought to our attention the Smarttress: a mattress intended, according to its inventor, to combat Spain's terrible reputation for adultery. It incorporates an array of 24 ultrasonic sensors and a finely tuned algoritmo that reads the frequency and intensity of bouncing on its surface.

When certain telltale signs are detected -- not just the cat on the bed again -- a battery-powered communication module alerts the owner's smartphone. The owner must then race home and deal with his or her marital strife firsthand, since this version of the mattress does not incorporate any remotely deployable ejection devices or other automated hanky-panky deterrents.


http://www.popsci.com/mattress-with-sensors-texts-you-when-it-detects-questionable-usage

Next obvious use - wire it up to a bedroom cam that can be accessed remotely. Of course, if you're that far down the road of distrust, you probably shouldn't be together with that partner to begin with.

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Hokay.... "Smart Mattress Alerts You When It Detects It's Being Used By A Stranger" (Original Post) Tab Apr 2016 OP
Wow, what will they think of next? 2naSalit Apr 2016 #1
There was a time when this MuseRider Apr 2016 #2
Oh, I thought it would identify the person you woke up with on a Sunday jberryhill Apr 2016 #3
AND IT IS BOUNCING Warren DeMontague Apr 2016 #4
OMFG! Dont call me Shirley Apr 2016 #5
I bet I know who designed this thing! GreenPartyVoter Apr 2016 #6
Smart mattresses for dumb people Generic Brad Apr 2016 #7
Cheating partner might get wind that spouse bought a Smartress meow2u3 Apr 2016 #8
That's what I would do Generic Brad Apr 2016 #9
Hilarious, but about as real as bonsai kittens I'm guessing... petronius Apr 2016 #10

MuseRider

(34,111 posts)
2. There was a time when this
Thu Apr 14, 2016, 07:55 PM
Apr 2016

could have come in handy It's OK, I never let her sleep on your side of the bed and we always had sex on my side, you mad?

I could have been out of there before I had to hear that!

 

jberryhill

(62,444 posts)
3. Oh, I thought it would identify the person you woke up with on a Sunday
Thu Apr 14, 2016, 08:05 PM
Apr 2016

Years ago, detecting strangers in my bed was easy. Identifying them was the hard part.

meow2u3

(24,764 posts)
8. Cheating partner might get wind that spouse bought a Smartress
Thu Apr 14, 2016, 09:08 PM
Apr 2016

and start using the sofa or the floor to do the horizontal mambo.

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