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iandhr

(6,852 posts)
Tue Jul 5, 2016, 02:42 PM Jul 2016

CONGRESSIONAL REPUBLICANS VOTE TO ABOLISH F.B.I.

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In a stunning rebuke to one of the nation’s oldest and most established law-enforcement agencies, House Republicans voted unanimously on Tuesday to abolish the Federal Bureau of Investigation.

Unlike most House measures, which come up for a vote only after months or even years of sluggish effort, the bill to eliminate the F.B.I. was drafted in a matter of minutes on Tuesday morning, Republican staffers confirmed.

House Speaker Paul Ryan offered no specific reason for the Republicans’ sudden frenzy of activity to abolish the F.B.I., but said that the Bureau represented “big government at its worst.”

“This is an agency that, when given even the simplest task to do, can’t manage to do it right,” he said.

Representative Trey Gowdy of South Carolina bemoaned the F.B.I.’s “bloated and wasteful” annual budget of eight billion dollars, which he said could easily pay for an additional eleven hundred Benghazi investigations.


http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/congressional-republicans-vote-to-abolish-f-b-i

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CONGRESSIONAL REPUBLICANS VOTE TO ABOLISH F.B.I. (Original Post) iandhr Jul 2016 OP
more wasted taxpayer money.... chillfactor Jul 2016 #1
This is satire, which becomes obvious if you read it.. dixiegrrrrl Jul 2016 #3
How is that obvious? Lucky Luciano Jul 2016 #22
Lol SummerSnow Jul 2016 #2
Andy Borowitz nails it again.. mountain grammy Jul 2016 #4
he is rtracey Jul 2016 #16
I thought this was real at first. liberalnarb Jul 2016 #5
me too - with the goofy baggers it is often hard to tell rurallib Jul 2016 #11
Andy Borowitz!!!!! calimary Jul 2016 #6
ROFL! Stonepounder Jul 2016 #7
Why not abolish the Presidency? Helen Borg Jul 2016 #8
Excellent. Mr.Bill Jul 2016 #9
Anybody notice ... Jopin Klobe Jul 2016 #10
This is something that neoconfederates have wanted to do since 1964, forest444 Jul 2016 #12
Actually Craig234 Jul 2016 #13
GOP wants less govt like criminals want less cops. nt ErikJ Jul 2016 #14
I was so relieved when I saw it is Borowitz GeoWilliam750 Jul 2016 #15
Wow, the first half of the excerpt miserably fails Poes Law test. AtheistCrusader Jul 2016 #17
Good idea. They should have investigated the bank$ters and put some of them in prison. jtuck004 Jul 2016 #18
Don the Con will retweet and endorse this report. 63splitwindow Jul 2016 #19
Damn you satire sakabatou Jul 2016 #20
yeah, I was suckered too vlyons Jul 2016 #21
Andy Borowitz! Love him madly! R&K nt longship Jul 2016 #23

dixiegrrrrl

(60,010 posts)
3. This is satire, which becomes obvious if you read it..
Tue Jul 5, 2016, 03:24 PM
Jul 2016

"........could easily pay for an additional eleven hundred Benghazi investigations. "

rurallib

(62,423 posts)
11. me too - with the goofy baggers it is often hard to tell
Tue Jul 5, 2016, 04:27 PM
Jul 2016

down in Kansas they are trying to turn their Supreme Court into a kitchen staff.

Jopin Klobe

(779 posts)
10. Anybody notice ...
Tue Jul 5, 2016, 04:27 PM
Jul 2016

... that the so-called "Republican" so-called "people" ...

... are God damned egocentrically/sociopathically/White-Trash-ignorantly insane? ...

forest444

(5,902 posts)
12. This is something that neoconfederates have wanted to do since 1964,
Tue Jul 5, 2016, 04:29 PM
Jul 2016

when, if you'll recall, they'd refer to the FBI as the "Federal Bureau of Integration."

The drive among the right to abolish the FBI snowballed further since Obama took office because the GOP sees the FBI as the biggest impediment to the growth of extremist groups on the far right (militias, white supremacists, and the like).

This ain't your father's Republican Party, that's for sure.

 

Craig234

(335 posts)
13. Actually
Tue Jul 5, 2016, 04:37 PM
Jul 2016

When the FBI was first proposed, Congress refused to approve it, worried that it would help make the US a police state.

Like to often happens, bureaucrats found a way around that, borrowing people from other agencies to staff the positions.

Then they wait for an incident, and proclaim this new agency the best way to protect the country and politically the Congress can't refuse at that point.

Tim Weiner wrote a great history of the agency in "Enemies".

 

jtuck004

(15,882 posts)
18. Good idea. They should have investigated the bank$ters and put some of them in prison.
Tue Jul 5, 2016, 05:12 PM
Jul 2016

They seem to be doing a half-ass job with terrorism, and not protecting people against donors$ to the parties who continue to prey on homeowners.

Dump 'em and get someone worth paying our hard-earned money for.

 

63splitwindow

(2,657 posts)
19. Don the Con will retweet and endorse this report.
Tue Jul 5, 2016, 05:14 PM
Jul 2016

Don the Con with Twitter is like allowing a child to decide how much candy to eat on Halloween.

vlyons

(10,252 posts)
21. yeah, I was suckered too
Tue Jul 5, 2016, 05:24 PM
Jul 2016

GOP pissed that Hillary wasn't indicted in a Star chamber and burned at the stake. They are so hateful, it's easy to believe that they will do any stupid thing. hahha

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