I am sorry. I am not going to keep quiet with friends and family

[boston bean]

who voted for trump because they voted for hate.

And if that makes them sad or ashamed, well good. If that makes them not like me or not call or talk to me...well good. For hell, if they can't take the truth of a family member or friend to heart, but can excuse Trumps hate, crudeness, rudness, violent language... why are they so upset with me?

They cannot and they should not be allowed to separate whatever it is they say they voted for him for, from what the reality of what they actually voted for.

I would never EVER vote for a racist/sexist/homophobic/xenophobic piece of shit for ANY reason. For some reason they felt it ok. Some reason allowed them to overlook this very in your face FACT. I question as to what the reasoning could possibly be, but none the less allow them their reasoning.

What they aren't allowed is to wash away impact of their vote.

[cilla4progress]

1. Staying home this year

[boston bean]

2. I am too, but I have already said my piece on FB and I had it out with family members on the phone.

I am sorry, they need to live with what they voted for. I won't forget.

[sarcasmo]

44. Me too, canceled with the wife's crazy Christian family. No Takesgiving.

[The Blue Flower]

3. Thanksgiving will be a perfect opportunity to demonstrate real-world courage

We're all talking among ourselves about standing up for our rights, standing against fascism. So don't stay home or otherwise avoid an opportunity to practice pushing past your fears. Start with the family and friends who are right there in front of you. Doing so will make it easier to do so in public and with strangers. The damage and destruction of a drump administration are about to get real. You have to get real, too. Don't cower.

[lonestarnot]

6. Great advise w/o the alcohol!

[cilla4progress]

7. I wear my safety pin in public and am out loud and proud on my FB

It would do no good to broach this with sis-in-laws fundie family. They will know what our absence means. Mother in law is 88. Not going to have her bear witness to family breakdown at this stage. She's a strong Hillary supporter, so she will miss us. 😔

[Zorro]

4. I'm with you

"Christians" in my family voted for the Antichrist. I do not suffer fools gladly.

[Bettie]

15. They are not Christians

they are Lutherans/Baptists/Methodists/Catholics, etc. But every one of the ones who voted for Trump have forever given up any claim to be followers of Christ.

[hamsterjill]

29. 1

And that "plus one" is coming from a Christian who could NEVER in a million years have voted for the vile hatred spewing out of Trump.

Thank you for your post. There needs to be more differentiation between true Christianity and the idiots who have hijacked it over the last several decades.

[Plucketeer]

31. ABSOLUTELY!

It's bad enough that so many folks escape their own misdeeds and irresponsibility with the phony blanket of supposed forgiveness. It's even more ludicrous when they stomp across the imagined edicts of the deity they purport to respect. Sheer and determined LUNACY!

[lonestarnot]

5. git 'em bean.

[smirkymonkey]

8. I understand you. I am in for a hard time this season as well.

Fortunately, my family is half and half and our half are the better debaters!

[duffyduff]

9. Family comes before politics in my view.

We don't discuss politics at family gatherings.

There is so much else to talk about and enjoy.

You never know what will happen. They may be dead tomorrow. You can't take back the words once that happens.

[Elmergantry]

17. same here

Afterall love trumps hate.

[boston bean]

25. I suppose if they expect forgiveness or overlooking of their vote, they can forgive or overlook

my words to them on the subject.

[cwydro]

57. I would imagine that they are as proud of their vote as you are of yours.

What makes you think they want forgiveness of it?

If the roles were reversed, would you want them up in your face?

Bitterness and anger eats at the person who feels it.

You're not going to change their minds by venting your spleen at them. Do you really think you will?

Or do you just want someone to be angry at?

[treestar]

76. I don't think BB said she was going to vent spleen

and if they are proud of their vote this time, sorry. McCain and Rmoney were one thing. This is different. It is painful to acknowledge this is not mere political difference. It's a fundamental difference in viewing the world and other people in it.

[ProfessorGAC]

33. Well, Then We're Different

I didn't choose my family. So, family doesn't come first. They're just some people who grew up in the same house.

[duffyduff]

59. I feel sorry for you that political purity is so much more important than a family.

THAT is fucking sad. You don't know how tragic that statement of yours is.

Years ago, my family had that bullshit of arguing politics, but much later it was agreed to it would NEVER, EVER be discussed in family get-togethers.

Like I said, words get said, somebody dies, and then you can't make it up.

[Generator]

66. And sometimes you are relieved when they die

You have ZERO idea what goes on in some people's childhoods. They barely survive it. And then get shamed for not keeping in touch with their abusers. And there is all kind of abuse-it doesn't have to be incest.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

68. I feel sorry for you,

for many reasons.

[ProfessorGAC]

70. Who Said That?

I didn't. Don't put words in my mouth. I said i don't put family ahead of everything because i didn't choose them.

Your inability to read without editorializing is what is sad.

[Amaril]

73. And sometimes it isn't just about politics.....

I have cut myself off from 99.9% of my extended family. I never fit in -- they made that clear my entire childhood & looked down on / ridiculed me because of it -- and the only reason I had anything to do with them after becoming an adult was for my Mom's sake. She passed away in 2007, and I haven't spoken to anyone on her side of the family since.........well, except the one aunt who called me six months after she died (none of them -- and I mean NONE -- reached out to me when she died. I was an only child, and had already lost my dad in 2002, and not a single one of her 9 surviving siblings sent so much as a card or called) asking for a teaspoon from the silver set my grandmother passed to my mother (because my mom was the one who bought it for her). When I said no, that was the end of that -- I never heard from her -- or any of them -- again, and frankly I'm glad of it.

I wouldn't have been surprised to have spotted more than one of them in the crowd shots from that White Nation gathering at Maggiano's the other evening. They are precisely "that" kind of people.

[gopiscrap]

54. fuck family

politics is everything what happens politically effects everything that happens to us.

[yeoman6987]

55. Wow. I can't and won't go there.

We don't discuss politics at all. Thanksgiving is a time for bringing up news on family and having a good time.

[duffyduff]

61. Because we don't ever talk politics, our get-togethers are GREAT.

We just have a great time. I will always have great memories of family gatherings until I kick off.

[duffyduff]

60. That is just so, I don't know what.

Actually, it is sad you have no value for personal relationships.

I am a lifelong single person, yet I have close family ties. I have no kids, but I stay connected to them through my place of work.

I hate what is going on in D.C., but I also deal with my own life. I have to, or I would go crazy with anger.

You are just sad.

[gopiscrap]

72. as a child who saw his mother suffer having her leg amputated

in additions to health problems all her lifer finally suffering a stroke at 38 when I was 16 and in addition to having my dad shot and killed in Vietnam when I was 7..by the time I was 15 I was an orphan because of political decisions. So yes fuck family if they vote some one like Trump. It's too personal for me. Political decisions effect ALL of our lives. I have no ;patience for racists, misogynists, self aggrandizers and war mongers because I have directly felt what effect they have had on my family!

[treestar]

75. Right wingers are the ones to bring it up

at least in my experience.

Also what happened to principles, etc.?

[DFW]

10. What I find is that it comes down to two basic kinds of people who love Trump

Type 1: Not evil to their core, but lonely, and frightened of things they have never seen, don't understand, but believe to their utmost that are "out there," and that the country somehow needs someone like Trump to protect them, even though they really have no idea how, or by doing what.

Type 2: these are people who, through being treated badly by others or pure bad luck, are seething in anger at the world, and only find solace or comfort in being mean to other people. Seeing others suffer makes them feel better about their own misery, be it physical, emotional, of material/financial.

I am fortunate to only have one family member who matches this description, and he is a cousin I haven't seen since 1994, and he lives in a state I haven't set foot in since 1977. I don't recall which marriage he is on by now (or if he even still is), but he was already not an easy character to be around even when we were teenagers.

[lostnfound]

62. The family members that voted for trump

The people in my own family who voted for him were 1) incapable of seeing Obama as a full human being (yes, I do recall one white male saying to me in confusion back in 2008, "I'm certainly not going to vote for HIM, he's a black!&quot and 2) Liberty college grads that have insulated themselves from the real world with a thick cocoon of Breitbart pap. And an old uncle that was inappropriately touching preteen girls back in the 60s, who never pays back his personal debts, either, and who re-imaged himself an evangelical preacher -- but I don't talk to him anymore, because I can't stand the hypocrisy, and he doesn't ask to borrow money anymore since I told him "sure but let's set up a payback schedule online."

[yallerdawg]

11. I had an 'aquaintance' tell me just yesterday...

that Trump will fix everything wrong here for the last eight years under Obama.

Now, this is Alabama, where everything Obama did was rejected by the state.

So, for the last eight years, Republicans have been running the show, nationally the last six years. Obama gets the blame.

Polarized.

There is no conversation, our neural nets are like from two different planets.

I'm hoping the end of the "Obama demon" will calm things down a bit. But we still have "immigrants, Mexicans, and Islamacists." It won't calm down.

I weep for what this country isn't.

[kimbutgar]

12. One of my cousins is going to spend thanksgiving with her in laws who voted for OH

My sister in law has barely spoke to her husband who voted for OH but this guy has always been rethug though. Happy to soend thanksgiving with my other Hillary loving relatives.

[hfojvt]

13. What is hate?

Isn't it pretty hateful to call somebody a "racist/sexist/homophobic/xenophobic piece of shit"? Seems to me that it definitely is. Of course, I know that your hatred is righteous and theirs is evil.

I am pretty sure that there are Obama haters out there who already think that you DID vote for a racist piece of shit.

And speaking of racists, my Republican friends never tire of bringing up the fact that the Democratic Party was once loaded with racists. That in fact, more Republicans voted for the Civil Rights act than Democrats.

Consider this hypothetical, which I am sure you will say could never happen.

Candidate A - xenophobic (since that probably means he/she thinks the USA should have a border) pro choice, supports equal pay

Candidate B - favors open borders, anti-choice, opposes equal pay

Are there no issues that are going to trump supposed xenophobia? Speaking of Boston, does that mean you voted for Ted Kennedy?

Also, chances are very good that their vote had NO impact at all. Certainly not by itself. My Trump supporting friend from Wisconsin did not cause Trump to win Wisconsin with his one vote, or even with his scores of hateful posts on FB, and even if he did through some kind of butterfly affect where he convinced his friends who then convinced their friends ... Well, Trump could have lost Wisconsin and still won the electoral college, and a vote for Trump in Kansas or California or many other places, also changed nothing.

[boston bean]

14. You are fighting on the wrong side. wow!

[Bettie]

16. OK. Glad I'm not

just misreading this. WTF?

[hfojvt]

22. Don't I know it

because I am fighting on the side of love and understanding.

When I should be spewing hate for "my" side.

Right now I am sorta disgusted with the country and all those Republican voters, but in general, it would probably help us to win if we could ever figure out that we should be attacking the politicians and NOT the voters who are duped into voting for them.

When we hate it is good, when they hate it is bad.
When we hate it is good, when they hate it is bad.

How many times am I required to write that?

Aw hell, I guess I am going back to room 101.

I hate when that happens.

[boston bean]

23. Let me put it this way dude you are trying to hard to make equivalencies. ok. way to hard.

[hfojvt]

34. it's not that hard

hate is pretty much equivalent to hate

the funny thing is, the hater pretty much always thinks that THEIR hate is justified.

Also kinda funny, in a sad way, it is apparently impossible to reason with somebody determined to hate, no matter which side they are on.

[boston bean]

42. What am I suppose to LOVE hate. my god. hating hate is a good thing.

[Bettie]

43. I get it

he's saying you are intolerant if you think intolerance is bad.

Now I know where he's (she's?) coming from. It's a right wing talking point: if you are don't like my hatred of (well, all the people Trump spewed hatred of, which his voters happily agreed with) then, you are the hateful one.

And this is why I probably will never speak to either of my brothers or their wives again.

[hfojvt]

49. actually no

I am saying a person is intolerant if they cannot tolerate people with certain opinions.

You may think it is legitimate to define certain opinions as "hatred".

It is true enough that some opinions are hatred, but people seem to keep wanting to expand that almost to the point, for example, where if somebody says "I don't want Hillary Clinton to be President" that they are a misogynist.

Your last line. What would you think if Hillary had won and your brothers never spoke to you again? Would that be a sign of their intolerance? I mean apparently they kept speaking to you even after Obama won twice.

[Bettie]

56. Obama did not run his campaign based on hate

He did not threaten people, he did not demean people.

There is a difference. If you refuse to see it, well, that's about you.

As to me not speaking to my brothers, they are toxic racist xenophobes and religious nutjobs. Not speaking to them is probably the sanest thing I've done in years.

If Hillary had won, they would probably not speak to me again until they wanted to borrow money (read: unpaid "borrow" as usual).

[treestar]

78. NO that is just disagreement

Don't let right wingers twist this!

It is not intolerant to disagree or argue.

THEY are the intolerant ones. Maybe each side does not "tolerate" the other's opinions, but that is not the point. They are intolerant of gay people, Muslims, other race people, etc. We live and let live. If they want to go to church, they can. They are the ones that don't tolerate others and think others should be forced to live that way.

[cwydro]

79. I understand what you're saying.

Many of us do.

But those who want to hate, on either side, will continue to do so.

[hfojvt]

46. well Martin did not think so

And he probably experienced much more hate directed at him than you and I combined.

"The nonviolent resister would contend that in the struggle for human dignity , the oppressed people of the world must not succumb to the temptation of becoming bitter or indulging in hate campaigns. To retaliate in kind would do nothing but intensify the existence of hate in the universe. Along the way of life, someone must have sense enough and morality enough to cut off the chain of hate. This can only be done by projecting the ethic of love to the center of our lives." Stride p. 104

"Agape means understanding, redeeming good will for ALL men....It is an entirely 'neighbor-regarding concern for others,' which discovers the neighbor in every man it meets. Therefore, agape makes no distinction between friend and enemy; it is directed toward both." Stride p 104-5

[Plucketeer]

37. There's a difference between hate and anger

I can hate something (someone) and not be seething with smoke jetting out of my ears. I can do that and not get my blood pressure up. But anger's different. Whether founded or not, it's not good to suppress it. It only hurts you to keep it inside. Anger suppressed to the point of overload is the cause of many a death. It's a natural human emotion that's dangerous to ignore.

[hfojvt]

47. not that big a difference

anger can be converted to hate without even the need of the new Hatetronics converter model 7734MV although those are pretty sweet, and I love that it comes in red and costs less than $200 at Target.

Speaking of targets though, anger looks a lot like hate when it is expelled at somebody or just gets thrown out there.

You suggest not keeping inside because it will hurt you. So instead you let it out where it can hurt others and cause more anger in them, which they let out and hurt others. That is like a game of pass it on. "The world is full of anger and hatred, pass it on."

[Plucketeer]

48. Nice "twist" there.

I guess you've never been angry with yourself, a malfunctioning Hatetronics unit or the looming return to your job on monday. But I'd like to be educated as to how those angers could hurt bystanders.

[hfojvt]

51. I used to be an angry young man

then I got old.

I came up with the saying "there is no problem so bad that you cannot make it worse by losing your temper."

Although it was funny, one time I was trying to nail my rural mail box to a post. After many failed attempts, I frigging lost it and started whaling on a nearby tree with my hammer and spewing out profanity. After about five minutes of that, I tried again, and wham bam in it went.

Also in a "field guide to survival" that I happened to get in my store, one of the author's suggestions was - get angry. That if you have to do something arduous to survive, like walk ten miles for help, that anger can be something that keeps you going.

Still, it is very easy for anger to hurt innocent bystanders, in the same way that I pounded on that innocent tree and spewed my verbiage into the ether. Suppose other targets had been handy? Had somebody else been around, then even a saint like me, the 9th most awesome person on the planet, might have said something hurtful to them.

[JTFrog]

24. Yep. nt

[Squinch]

80. Not even a little surprising.

[Maru Kitteh]

52. JPR has been holding hands and singing "Give Trump a Chance"

Fuck all those ratfuckers, and all the sexist, racist, xenophobic fascist-enabling Trump voters, Trump defenders and Trump apologists.

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

69. I totally understand!

What I don't get are these people acting like "politics" is some insignificant matter that affects nothing, or that says nothing about the people who support certain politicians.

I consider friendship very personal and important. l barely have the time enough to spend with my many non-R friends. Why would I sacrifice any of that time to people who support philosophies and policies as abhorrent, unjust, and unreasonable as those associated with the modern Republican Party?

Same goes for my RW relatives. I would help them in an emergency if I could. Otherwise, I want as little to do with them as possible.

Ignore the bullies here trying to make you feel bad about your opinion on this. OK to disagree, but some of these replies are personal attacks on you and uncalled for, not to mention hypocritical.

[treestar]

77. your view would make it impossible to call out racism

POS might be too much. But a racist is a racist. It's not unkind. Why don't they own it? I find it very interesting they don't want to be called racists. Indicates they know it is wrong.

[MFM008]

18. My sister and her

Boyfriend open their mouths they are going to get an ugly surprise.

[JTFrog]

19. I'm not doing anything for the holidays this year. Too depressed.

My brother died in May. My father had a heart attack in July. My kids have moved back to Indiana because the cost of living in the bay area is ridiculous. They decided that they would rather deal with the bullshit red state policies than be out on the streets in a blue state.

My other brother voted for Trump. He has tried to apologize, but I still can't talk to him without crying.

I hope these feeling pass someday.

[hfojvt]

30. that's pretty harsh

but at least you have kids. I'd probably follow them to Indiana.

Of course, I have lived all my life in a red state. Well, except for the ten years in Wisconsin and five school years in Minnesota, but even in Wisconsin I had a Republican Governor, Republican state legislators and a Republican Congressman or two.

Consider helping out at the losers' dinner. That is what I will be doing.

I know, I know, I should not call it a losers' dinner, but that's what I call it, and I am the biggest loser there, so I am talking about myself more than anybody else.

I don't care about the meal, and have never found any companionship there, but I like to help them clean up afterwards. Of course, as a janitor I am a trained professional in that task.

Better to do something than be depressed.

Consider a musical break too. I plugged in my old computer and listened to queen and def leppard for a few hours. Pretty sure that helped.

[DemonGoddess]

20. I volunteered to work

I know me and my temper, and I also know I'd say some seriously unkind things to those that voted for the cretin.

[JTFrog]

21. I volunteered as well.

I wanted to do something positive. Unfortunately for me, when I decided to volunteer, Thanksgiving and Christmas positions were all filled in the bay area. So I am gonna volunteer between the holidays.

[kebob]

26. I Am WITH You

Girding for battle on Thursday!

[cwydro]

27. No Trump supporters in my immediate circle.

If this was an issue for me, I'd simply expect everyone to keep their political thoughts to themselves on a day that celebrates good feelings and family.

I'm curious how you think your opinion can made them sad or ashamed. Most likely, nasty behavior by you will simply make them sad for YOU.

If you absolutely feel the need to bring up politics at Thanksgiving, perhaps ask reasonable why they voted the way they did. Exchange ideas and discuss like a reasonable adult.

I hope you have a stress-free and happy holiday. Politics should not supersede relationships that are important to us.

[DinahMoeHum]

28. Fortunately, nobody in my family supported the asshole. . .

. . .not even my Republican brother and SIL.

. . .so there shouldn't be any issue this Thanksgiving.

[hamsterjill]

32. I'll be with family that is mostly Dems thankfully.

There is one couple that I'm sure were Trumpass supporters. I'll not say anything unless they do and if they do, I will not hold back. They will be outnumbered at the table.

After dinner, I'll be covering the feeding and care of a couple of TNR colonies of feral cats so that their normal caregiver can travel for her holiday. If my own meal becomes too hot to handle, those kitties may just need to eat early!!!

[jmg257]

35. Around here come holidays there will likely be more Trump voters then Dems who supported Hillary.

I'm not expecting much guilt, likely they all had their reasons that seemed good enough to them at the time..


Sure as shit there will most likely be some tears.

[barbtries]

36. my oldest son

texted me to stop posting "negative propaganda."
A friend since infancy, all of our lives, told me to "give him a chance." She's never voted. After i confirmed that indeed she did not vote in this election, I said, "Conversation over."
She said, "I love you," and I said, "I love you too and I always will but this we cannot talk about ever."

i posted a video about puppies and babies and texted my son that he can hide my posts that he doesn't like.

i can be unfriended. I unfriend people too, when they cross a certain line. One woman put up a fake news story about protesters kicking a homeless man to death. Even after more than one person pointed out that it was not true, she kept it up and piously defended herself as being the person standing up for love. end fb friendship.
.
so far we still have our 1st amendment rights. now more than ever is the time to exercise those rights.

[Nevernose]

38. I'm going to be polite, diplomatic, and judicious

But I'm sure as hell not going to keep quiet, either. I'm only being nice about things with people in the real world because it's pragmatic (plus I'm a nice person, or at least often try to be).

[RussBLib]

39. I look forward to Thanksgiving

There are a couple of regressives in the family and I relish the opportunity to press them hard on Trump. I'm rather tired of being overly polite, and with the example of Trump, well, fuck that.

[lark]

40. I said I wasn't going to unfriend anyone on FB because of this, but just had to.

4-5 got moved to Acquaintances from Friends and I unfollowed them so I don't see their hateful pro-Drumpf idiocy. I finally had to unfriend several, one after my husband almost got into a fight with him defending my right to hate Drumpf. The other was a friend I've known for 35 years. I tried, throughout the election cycle, to talk sense to her and at least got to stop posting so much anti-HRC shit and pro-Drumpf. However, when she posted that Drumpf had more votes than HRC, that just did it for me. I advised her that she was promoting lies and needed to check her sources and that HRC had 1.5 million more votes, look it up, then unfriended her. Makes me sad, she was always more moderate than me, but was a true moderate. Then her sons joined the military and she just lost her mind. Her husband is on Medicare and she's a housewife, so they won't feel an immediate impact, but lots of people our age will get hurt and she's part of the reason why. I just can't tolerate assholes who help destroy our country and won't tolerate them anymore.

[jodymarie aimee]

45. No way in hell will I go

I am disabled and my SSDI is $10Grand a year. No auto, no cell phone, $16 a month in Foodstamps. My sister in law's family all rich bankers from Milwaukee. Their R vote may make me homeless next year. Cannot do it.

[Skittles]

50. thank you

silence = agreement.....I will trash them every time I hear their racism and ignorance - EVERY time

[blue cat]

53. Me either

I just had to tell a group of my friends texting that they better get used to me being politically incorrect when the subject of trump is brought up.

[csziggy]

58. I'm just going to have to avoid politics.

Until Friday I thought I wouldn't have to deal with any of it but then my husband told me his right wing sister and her Dominionist husband are hosting Thanksgiving.

The sister and some of their kinds were planning to vote for Gary Johnson but it turns out the husband voted for Trump. With that combination, if anyone says anything about the election, I could easily go off. Gary Johnson's 205,007 votes would have turned Florida for Hillary Clinton. While that would not have given her enough electoral votes to win, it would have made it much closer.

I am NOT happy about going. Maybe I should go out and find some disease to come down with by Wednesday night?

[lindysalsagal]

63. It's pointless. They'll choose fRump over you. They're brainwashed fools.

There's no rationality behind their devotion. All you can do is sit back and watch him take us over an economic//healthcare/ecological/diplomatic cliff.

Eventually, just as with shrub, we'll blame him rather than the voters for the castastrophies we're all about to experience.

Until then, you won't change them.

[boston bean]

64. Yep and some did.

[CK_John]

65. IMO, If they bring it up, tell them you will wait until next year and see how well he does. nt

[lindysalsagal]

81. That's a great plan. n/t.

[TNNurse]

71. I am skipping a huge gathering.

My cousin's family and her extended family. I have no idea how some of them voted but am sure there will be Trump voters in the group. I would not be able to swallow a bite of food. I do not want to make a scene in front of folks who are in their 90s....one will be 96 in January. I suspect they did not get out to vote anyway.

Maybe next Thanksgiving, but this is too soon.....of course, by next year we may be dealing with very different issues.

So quietly my husband, sister and I will eat and it will be peaceful and we can talk safely and search for reasons to be thankful.

Maybe the local forest fire will be out.....hell, we may have to watch football.

[treestar]

74. Exactly, the right wingers tend to bully

everyone - stand up to them.