General Discussion
Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsI am curious...how do Dems in red states maintain their sanity?
Seriously, I live in a blue city and state and am on the verge of a nervous breakdown everyday. I applaud all of you! How do you do it?
drray23
(7,633 posts)mcar
(42,334 posts)It is getting more and more difficult. My SO and I serve as each others sounding boards. I'd go insane otherwise.
Most of my friends here are apolitical and clueless. I love them but get frustrated at their willful ignorance.
nikibatts
(2,198 posts)the Social Security Disability systems thanks to a corrupt doctor, pharmacist.
AgadorSparticus
(7,963 posts)I live in a "swing state" (Florida) but my area is very red, nothing here works to turn it anywhere near blue and the Corrine Brown scandal added fuel to the fire.
zipplewrath
(16,646 posts)It's where the current bourbon craze can trace it's roots.
mreilly
(2,120 posts).... since last November I've drank every single day. And switched to watching sports in the evening since reality is too much to deal with...
NobodyHere
(2,810 posts)Coventina
(27,121 posts)NobodyHere
(2,810 posts)Coventina
(27,121 posts)(and other science facts)
ThoughtCriminal
(14,047 posts)I wish it was just a show and I could sit back and relax.
SCLumbeelady
(37 posts)mercuryblues
(14,532 posts)only I don't bite my tongue. I either toss them out facts or mock them, depending on my mood.
Huh. All I hear is how graham needs to go. How you aren't ever going to vote for him again. Yet, every year he wins by a landslide. Are you a closet voter?
WhiteTara
(29,718 posts)This is a sanctuary.
drray23
(7,633 posts)You just have to look harder. Another interesting observation is that I have met many southerners who are too shy to say the lean democrats. They feel they would be ostracised by their neighbors if it was known. So, they vote dems but go along with their neighbors trump chest thumping.
mcar
(42,334 posts)We also have an actual Indivisible group here. I haven't gone to a meeting yet but intend to.
Orrex
(63,216 posts)I make a point to "like" their posts, and if I see them getting blasted by local Red voters, I'll sometimes send the Leftie a message to reassure them that they're not alone.
TexasProgresive
(12,157 posts)It's just one day at a time. Once Texas was a solid democratic state. If those idiot secessionists can wish that the south will rise again we can hope that Texans will once again return to sanity.
ekelly
(421 posts)I live in the DFW area and I have hope!
marlakay
(11,476 posts)And Corpus Christi, was glad to see hotel tv on CNN in CC instead of fox.
Daughter just moved to SA. The area was very friendly but I didn't talk politics with anyone.
Gravitycollapse
(8,155 posts)Awsi Dooger
(14,565 posts)It was effectively a warm up for Trump. Scott made it illegal to mention the term global warming in the legislature.
Technically we were a blue state briefly until 2016 but it never felt that way. Florida's margin never matched the national margin that Obama managed. The legislature is full of wingers, the turnpike is still named after Ronald Reagan despite him not giving a damn about the state, and so forth.
Now we've got a local election coming up and the Republican ground assault is unlike anything I've ever experienced, in this state or California or Nevada. They literally hammer every doorstep multiple times every day. My neighbor is a good liberal and got so fed up he bought a "No Soliciting" sign on Saturday and put it up in the most prominent area possible. Today I got flyers attached to my door knob with a huge picture of Donald Trump alongside the local candidate Diaz, with the wording on the flyer loudly proclaiming that Trump backs Diaz. It's ridiculous to believe the GOP is shying away from Trump. I'm concerned that this new ground emphasis is going to be the trend everywhere, designed to impact the 2018 midterms and limit the damage.
mitch96
(13,912 posts)Amen to that.... I like the state but hate the Gov. He just bought his title. I think it was a ego thing.. Never answers a straight question... Grrrrrr...
m
3catwoman3
(24,007 posts)...with either Rick or Scott in his name -
Rick Scott
Rick Perry
Rick Snyder
Scott Walker
Did I miss any?
kerry-is-my-prez
(8,133 posts)Made an ass of himself and made national news but has still been re-elected several times.
mitch96
(13,912 posts)I think you just about got 'em all!!
Really don't like this guy.....
m
mnhtnbb
(31,392 posts)I have not given up alcohol (which I should have done) and, in fact, just had a cocktail on the deck.
I refuse to let my husband talk endlessly about Trump or Republicans or any of their policies.
I don't sleep well.
I just adopted two senior kitties and am focusing my attention on making a difference for them.
I have a knee replacement scheduled for mid-July. I will NOT watch any cable news (other than Rachel)
while I am recuperating/rehabbing the new knee.
Docreed2003
(16,863 posts)It's nice being a big blue dot in the middle of red!
Aristus
(66,388 posts)I hate country music, but I've been to Nashville several times, and I love it. Great city.
WhiskeyGrinder
(22,357 posts)Amishman
(5,557 posts)Knowing my in-laws are Republicans doesn't make Christmas dinner less delicious
Knowing my elderly neighbors voted Trump doesn't mean I shouldn't help them with their driveway when it snows.
Someone brings up the subject, I'll do my best to convince them of their errors. Otherwise I let it go. Pretty sure I'd have a heart attack otherwise
Coventina
(27,121 posts)1. I avoid local newscasts
2. I'm on DU daily (even if I'm too busy to post)
3. I subscribe to "The Nation"
4. I don't talk politics except with like-minded people.
5. I vote vote vote vote vote!!!!
6. I spend a lot of time petting my fur-baby
7. I see my therapist every two weeks
8. I work on being physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually healthy (and believe me, it's WORK!)
9. As a college professor, I work on opening my students minds. I don't tell them WHAT to think, I teach them HOW to think. Reality has a liberal bias.
spanone
(135,844 posts)or real bent
INdemo
(6,994 posts)Everyone in this Red Area I live in know that Im a liberal...In fact being a liberal is not acceptable if one is a member of a service Club like the Local Lions Club for example. Some time ago I got into a heated argument in a public place, with the then incoming Club President because I was backing Obama/Biden,
I resigned my membership immediately and haven't spoke to any of the members since.
I do not put myself in a position whereby I worry about a nervous breakdown because I tell it like it is and will continue to do so.
blueinnebraska
(1 post)Exact same thing happened to me in my Lions Club. Had been a member for 20yrs.
INdemo
(6,994 posts)Gothmog
(145,321 posts)It is a slow process but things can change.
Laffy Kat
(16,383 posts)I live in a purple state and am barely hanging on to my sanity!
kydo
(2,679 posts)BigDemVoter
(4,150 posts)I made it exactly three years.
It was awful.
The ONLY things people were interested in:
"Are you married?" -- Nope. I'm gay and not married to anybody. . . . YET.
"Where do you go to church?" I don't. I'm not a believer, and in any case, I don't come from a Christian household.
I hated just about every second.
And I'm back in San Francisco. . . .
lunasun
(21,646 posts)Yea a friend of mine moved for a yr to a place like that . He quit his job to get back
cry baby
(6,682 posts)being a round peg that doesn't fit into the square holes, like most everyone around me.
I have found the Texas Democratic Women group since trumps "election" and those people have saved my sanity...plus, my 89 yr old mother is a strong and outspoken democrat!
Even my hubby is libertarian that comes from a right wing family. Trust me...we NEVER discuss politics.
I often feel very alone.
Mr. Ected
(9,670 posts)It's my panic room.
It stays on 24/7 and I read every single post in GD and LBN. If I didn't, being completely surrounded by MAGA freaks with nary a Democrat within miles, I'd go fuggin crazy.
demtenjeep
(31,997 posts)seriously, anti-anxiety meds started before this mess but thinking God for them now
Jersey Devil
(9,874 posts)I lived in NJ my whole life but had a right wing nutjob for a Congressman, Scott Garrett (NJ-05). Last year I moved to North Carolina where I had a Democratic Congressman for all of 4 months until he was replaced by a Republican in a gerrymandered district and finally in November they replaced Garrett in NJ with a Democrat. My head is spinning.
femmocrat
(28,394 posts)Easy to do now that I'm retired, but even when I was working, I never discussed politics.
I only engage in political conversations with two close friends and online.
I had a Kerry bumper sticker on my car during the 2004 election. Someone threw a bottle at my car and tried to run me off the road. Other people called the police who chased the person down.
It's scary here - a lot of crazy RWNJs. Like you, I only talk politics with friends or here online.
marybourg
(12,633 posts)mitch96
(13,912 posts)I have some very long time friends.. like 50 years long. Two liberal and two conservative..
We never discuss politics religion or sports... Other than that we get along great...
Although I must admit one of my conservative friends goes off the rails sometimes and we have to
"nudge" him back in line...
m
UncleTomsEvilBrother
(945 posts)We have civil rights marches. We try to make sure we don't drive late at night. We make sure to warn our sons about disobeying the police. We try to make sure our fellow DEMS can survive in meager housing. We try to make sure our public schools get equal funding.
We realize, that though we are DEMS, the Democratic party will rarely come knocking on our doors for help or support.
Wellstone ruled
(34,661 posts)for ten years. Can remember in 2004 when 13 of like minded people formed our County Demorcratic Party. Now that County has several thousand Democrats.
Now live in a newly Blue State,hope to hell we can hold it. Once we get Heller and Laxalt asses kicked to the curb,then I will feel vindicated.
mountain grammy
(26,624 posts)and Laxalt.
LiberalArkie
(15,719 posts)MontanaMama
(23,322 posts)Thankfully my city is a solid blue or I would lose my shit more than I do. My spouse is apolitical but has been a bit more attentive since I had a complete come apart on November 8th. I have my friends here on DU, a weekly therapy appointment and a nice bottle is Sauvignon Blanc in the fridge at all times.
xmas74
(29,674 posts)And other liberal clubs. Attend meetings for everything :school board, hospital board, city council, etc. Speak out when able. Become an officer in said clubs. Join non political clubs. Become an officer and let them all realize that the changes made to those clubs were valuable and that they actually like a liberal.
Lather,rinse, repeat.
Phoenix61
(17,006 posts)I live in a pretty small town. Everyone knows my politics and has learned not to start any shit with me. I'm blessed with a good memory and a knack for remembering details. Makes it easy to win arguments with Faux fans.
asuhornets
(2,405 posts)Not very expensive,, Traffic is horrible. Absolut & cranberry juice can go a long way.
ornotna
(10,803 posts)All kidding aside, you just have to slog through it and get on with your life.
DFW
(54,405 posts)But first off, I'm rarely home these days (mostly about 6000 miles to the northeast). Second, Dallas is fairly blue compared to the rest of Texas, especially the rural parts and smaller towns. Third--despite everything, there are over THREE AND A HALF MILLION of us in Texas that voted for Hillary in 2016. Not too many other states, including ones Hillary carried, can say that.
TexasBushwhacker
(20,202 posts)It's the suburbs and rural areas that are red.
YCHDT
(962 posts)... doubt the votes there are being suppressed by VID measures or purging.
Abbott and Perry do NOT have a lot of friends in Dallas, and if they don't have many friends in our area (Highland Park) then they sure don't have a lot of friends elsewhere in the area.
redstatebluegirl
(12,265 posts)I also try and do what I can for the party here, weak as it is. I canvass, I do phone banks, give money to the state and local party and candidates. Try to keep my circle of aquaintences to like minded people or the few sane republicans in town. The past few months have been pure hell to be sure.
The River
(2,615 posts)2500 miles west.
pirateshipdude
(967 posts)dawg
(10,624 posts)I don't feel too threatened.
Despite living in one of those "rural" areas, I know a number of like-minded people who feel the same as me. Honestly, the whole country is going to suffer. Blue or red - it makes no difference.
The Genealogist
(4,723 posts)I live in the Missouri Ozarks. The land of Roy Blunt and John A$hcroft. It is about as red as it gets. I am the only person in on my Dad's side of the family that is not a fire-breathing wingnut. There are only two topics with them: RW politics and the wonders of conservative evangelical Protestantism. The local radio market is clogged with RW blather. I honestly ignore most of the RW bullshit. I'd go insane otherwise. I usually just roll my eyes and shake my head. You just get used to it.
SouthernIrish
(512 posts)I have never lived anywhere else. Luckily, my parents and my boyfriend are all very liberal. My best friends are all Democrats too. I don't bring up politics in public, but if someone trash talks about liberals, I say my peace. They assume that everyone around here are Southern Baptist right wing morons just like they are. I usually laugh in their face when they throw their ignorant talking points out there and then I fact check them. They usually quit talking then. They are so used to not being challenged that it throws them off their game. I always walk away smiling. "Bless their ♡".
Paladin
(28,264 posts)Solly Mack
(90,773 posts)But they always seem to look as if they are not sure if I am mocking them or not. I love that expression.
Different Drummer
(7,621 posts)is punishable by not less than five years in prison and a fine of not less than $10,000. I'm kidding, of course, but the Bible verse that no prophet is accepted in his hometown sometimes seems applicable. I don't know any like-minded people in real life, so this site is where I come for refuge and to restore my sanity. Absent that my mental health would be severely damaged, perhaps beyond repair.
TXCritter
(344 posts)I came here to support a wildlife rehab/education center. I focus on that piece of the puzzle.
doc03
(35,348 posts)anyone unless I know they are Democrats.
kerry-is-my-prez
(8,133 posts)are all Democrats since we're in social services. There is one person we suspect might be a Republican, though she denies it.
hamsterjill
(15,222 posts)And a lot of time on the phone calling my reps.
ileus
(15,396 posts)Hit a baseball game, take the kids to do this or that.
Have fun enjoy life...
Skittles
(153,169 posts)it's easy because they can never defend their ignorant, racist views for long without sounding, well, ignorant and racist
GeorgeGist
(25,321 posts)Butterflies
(1,240 posts)I have a hard time respecting people who would vote for Trump.
mountain grammy
(26,624 posts)Lonely, but do have a couple good liberal friends and sometimes attend county dems meetings.. vow to do that more often.
bluecollar2
(3,622 posts)AwakeAtLast
(14,130 posts)25 years (in Indiana) was enough.
mnhtnbb
(31,392 posts)AwakeAtLast
(14,130 posts)I grew up in So. IL. I know it is Red, too, but nothing like IN. I had never heard of KKK activity until I moved here.
mnhtnbb
(31,392 posts)Had an appointment this morning with my ortho surgeon as a prelim to the knee replacement surgery next month.
On the way out the door I watched a woman--probably 20-30 years younger than I am--struggling on her walker
coming out of physical therapy. Someone asked her how long ago. Two weeks (for a partial knee replacement).
By the time I got home and thought about all the pain pills they will be giving me (Oxy +others for 10 days, then the Oxy drops
off) and all the work it's going to take to rehab the damn knee, all I could think of was whether it was worth it.
Seriously. The country is broken. Our government is completely broken. The only place I want to go anymore is to the beach.
I was ranting and raving about the dumbfu*ks in the country, the a$$hole Republicans, the latest appointment to the Supreme Court,
Cheeto Mussolini, and all the bull$hit that goes with that lying POS a$$hole who has no business occupying the Oval Office.
It took multiple attempts at trying to contact AT&T--talking to robots--probably a total of more than an hour to finally schedule a repair
tech whom I'm now waiting for (until 5 PM) to fix our landline. The house we built 6 years ago is already needing repairs/replacements of things that
have failed--like windows and gutters. I'm tired of fighting with corporate a$$holes who only want to take your money and give as little service
as possible and make it difficult as possible to get it.
I'm really in a crap mood. Contemplating a drive to the beach and just go for a long swim. Fu*k it. Then I think of Snowy and Elmo and Stitch
who are so happy to have a roof, a place to sleep, someone to feed them. Life can be simple, can't it, when somebody else takes all the responsibility?
I wish the damn phone guy would hurry up and get here. I think I need a nap today.
greymattermom
(5,754 posts)Our special election was exciting, and I met a lot of interesting folks during the Ossoff events. When John Lewis is in town, I go to some of his events. I look at the Lukovich cartoons on ajc.com, and I go to Manuel's Tavern for inspiration. I take visitors to the Carter Presidential Library, the King National Historic Site, and the Civil Rights Museum, where they can sit at a lunch counter and feel what it was like.
Runningdawg
(4,520 posts)riversedge
(70,242 posts)northoftheborder
(7,572 posts)Always vote, contribute to other states when no one local to support, Audible books. Regular emails to reps (not that it does any good whatsoever, but keep up the drumbeat.)
SamKnause
(13,108 posts)I don't discuss politics with neighbors.
I don't discuss politics with family members who voted for Trump.
Hortensis
(58,785 posts)outnumber us come in two types:
Those who will be friends with liberals, California city people, atheists and Jews (all represented in our family) and those who won't. HUGE difference between the two, and I really regret that so many don't understand that.
We have friends among the first and seldom and only delicately discuss politics with them. The others we usually feel free to discuss politics with if they start it, and no holds barred if they start it.
jdadd
(1,314 posts)Blue_true
(31,261 posts)and Hillary 2016 for prison stickers. When you look at their vehicles, you know they are idiots, lots of jacked up trucks with them.
GulfCoast66
(11,949 posts)Even in a gerrymandered red district.
Lately have begun to respond to any anti-gay, abortion or otherwise liberal position by stating that the speaker is quite the believer in Sharia law. The responses have been entertaining. But indefensible.
Helps I am a big white guy.
misanthrope
(7,418 posts)I spend as much time alone as possible. When forced into social situations, I avoid a lot of conversation. My wife is very loquacious though so I spend a lot of time sitting and standing beside her, lost in my own thoughts while she talks.
It's at its worst at family events. I have just a couple of family members who are very enlightened and they live elsewhere. I have no other birth family here.
My in-laws are highly conservative, both culturally and politically. Once again, I just follow the wife around and let her do what comes naturally since most of the gossip and superficial subject matter bores me.
I avoid most all local news, print and broadcast. I long ago gave up trying to make any political impact here as this is Tea Party and Trump nirvana. Any frustration I feel is ultimately my fault as I should have moved before health issues impinged my ability to do so.
All told, I'd rather spend my time reading or learning so the lack of social interaction doesn't bother me much.