TPM - Josh Marshall re Trump "He Can't Even Fake It"

[NRaleighLiberal]

http://talkingpointsmemo.com/edblog/he-cant-even-fake-it#more-1080669

By JOSH MARSHALL Published SEPTEMBER 2, 2017 9:03 PM

People with certain autism spectrum disorders have difficulty reading social cues which most people understand intuitively. Therapists have developed techniques which can help them learn through training what comes effortlessly to others. I can’t help thinking of this when I see President Trump touring Texas with his litany of jarring, tone-deaf or just plain weird comments. But the deficit in this case isn’t social cue cognition. It’s empathy.

There is, of course, a word for people who have an extreme inability to feel empathy: sociopath. It can also be certain diagnoses of what is called ‘malignant narcissism.’ But even that isn’t quite what gets my attention. Because many sociopaths are actually quite adept at demonstrations of empathy. They don’t feel it. But they can mimic the behavior. That’s what gets me. Trump can’t even pretend. Even your garden variety jerk politician can put on a show of hugs and supportive words. Trump can’t.

There are plenty of cases where Trump is cruel and awful. We’ve seen plenty of those. In those cases, his predatory, probably sociopathic nature is plainly evident. But everybody knows that during a natural disaster the President’s job is consoler-in-chief. You don’t have to be crazy cynical to realize that it’s often a chance for a chief executive to connect with people in a human way. It can gain them support. Trump also clearly realizes this and is actually trying. Maybe he doesn’t really care about supporting people. But he gets that he’s supposed to do this touring, hugging, saying the right thing thing. Since this was generally seen as a strong suit for President Obama, he probably wants to outdo Obama at it as well. But he can’t. He’s trying. But it is painfully obvious he doesn’t know how. It’s not just that he can’t outdo Obama. That’s no surprise. He can’t even go through the motions.

In addition to the basic body language he keeps saying things like “Have a Good Time!” to people stranded in a shelter. Or, ‘it’s going great‘ to people who’ve just lost everything. Or, look at this huge turnout to people who … well, you get the idea. When it comes to acting human or compassionate it’s like the part of his brain governing that species of behavior has been removed. It’s like watching a person who has profound social awkwardness in a meet and greet situation at a cocktail party. It’s painful. But again, with Trump it’s not social awkwardness. It’s a basic, seemingly fundamental inability not only to experience but even to fake the experience of empathy or human concern. That additional part is what is remarkable to me.

How Trump got this way I have no clue. But it’s the behavior of a very damaged or emotionally stunted person.

[madaboutharry]

1. I wonder if any of the cable news

folks who got all excited about Trump's visit ended up feeling foolish after his inappropriate statements.

In addition to what Josh Marshall wrote, Trump completely lacks self discipline and his unable to stay controlled for more than half an hour.

[NRaleighLiberal]

2. each day I try to find ways not only to express my loathing....

but ways to cope - and try to keep hope that Mueller will do the work that will take them all down.

I have no faith at all in most of our media to do anything but work to normalize the asshole.

[pangaia]

3. I would be surprised if he actually wanted to return to texas.

My guess is that his handlers told him to, or talked him into it in some way.

He displays no positive feeling whatsoever about ANYTHING because there is nothing inside him, except deep self-hatred and extreme pain... really, really constant emotional pain, caused by.. what. his father? other experiences as a child?

[smirkymonkey]

22. I really would like to know what the hell happened to him in his childhood that made him

such an incredible asshole. Such a person who lacks basic human decency and kindness. Was he born that way or was it conditioning? I have never seen anyone so completely tone-deaf when it comes to dealing with tragedy. Most people at least know how to pretend.

[cyclonefence]

27. That's what I keep coming back to, too

What a miserable child he must have been to have turned out this way. I would like to know what his mother was like; we have a small idea of the asshole his dad must have been, but I believe his mother might be the key to his misery.

[smirkymonkey]

28. I am looking forward to an exhaustive biography. What made him this way?

There is more to his story than we have heard so far.

[annabanana]

37. .. kind of my thinking too.

Mary Anne MacLeod Trump

She was raised in a Scottish Gaelic-speaking household with her second language being English, arriving in New York City on May 11, 1930‍—‌one day after her 18th birthday, declaring she intended to become a U.S. citizen and would be staying permanently in America.

What would she yell at him in Gaelic when he displeased her? I'll bet it would be a trigger for him...

[raging moderate]

38. Hey, he looks like her.

If you subtract the hair and makeup and focus on the bone structure, there is a marked resemblance.

[japple]

40. Keep the hair and makeup. It's almost exactly the same. Different styles

but the same.

[lunatica]

31. In Donald's case it's lack of experience in pretending empathy

He's a Malignant Narcissist which explains his mean streaks and vengeful nature if anyone dares to cross him. He's had a lifetime of practicing and experiencing his total self-centeredness in a confrontational way. We know that he has to create an enemy that he can destroy. That's his life blood. His raison d'etre. He lives that every moment of his consciousness.

But compassion and empathy have never been skills he needs to pretend to have. It's just not something he's needed to learn in his life because no one has demanded it of him before.

He has pretended to be a big giver of donations but those have proven false, which is one indication that he hasn't been held accountable of those lies. Up to now he's been able to turn his critics into enemies he can vanquish with his tweets. The fact that at his age he tweets idiocies and arguments you can shoot holes into is proof that he has a lot of total gaps in his personality and his life's experiences.

It's that he's not just a Sociopath or a Narcissist, but he's also always been coddled as being so rich that he simply hasn't ever experienced not getting every single thing he wants. He has no idea what it's like not to get what he wants or having to wait for something.

Empathy is not a thing he's ever needed to develop or learn, even in an experiential way. He can't find a needed antagonist in people who are so far beneath him that he should even bothered to consider them as essential in any way.

[linnknee]

4. The whole family is awkward

Its amazing how the entire family thinks they know everything and are totally worthless and stupid. What has ivanka and jared accomplished in 7 months. And tje queen mother probably wears stiletto shoes to sleep. The whole bunch of clueless hillbillies.

[Hekate]

16. Now that's just unfair to real hillbillies. The Mad King was born filthy rich, and I mean filthy...

They believe they are born to be served by the rest of us because they deserve to be. The arrogance and lack of humanity is beyond belief. In addition, the Trumps are a sick family in so many ways.

I was born blue collar but with an aspirational family. Fortunately my generation's parents were willing to be taxed for good public education system, and we benefited. From Kindergarten through University, I went to public schools, and they were a great societal leveler up to a point.

My first extended encounter with a whole bunch of people who were born wealthy and took privilege so much for granted that they couldn't even see it was when I decided to go to graduate school at a private institute. While it was a superlative experience in many ways, it took me over a year to figure out that we were not talking about the same things at all when it came to experiences like first jobs or working your way through college. It really was a different point of view, based on different experiences from birth on.

Yet these people, my classmates for 3 years, were empathetic, compassionate, creative and mature human beings who intended to do good for others, and did so.

In my years volunteering at Democratic fundraisers I have casually met any number of wealthy local Dems, and they are the same. Good people, doing good, sharing what they have in hopes of making a better world.

It's not the wealth that ruins people like the Trumps -- it's something missing in their souls that goes back at least 3 generations. In the Mad King's case, an awful lot of people are pretty sure he's suffering the onset of dementia, which afflicted his father at the same age.

[longship]

5. Josh Marshall's Editor's Blog is a daily must read.

Talking Points Memo

[zentrum]

8. ++++

[Poiuyt]

11. Josh Marshall is one of my favorite writers

Very insightful and writes with beautiful prose.

[xor]

6. I just watched a video of one of his speeches in Houston

It really was extremely awkward. I feel confident that I don't feel this way just because I don't like the guy, but rather because he truly is incapable of knowing how to behave and understand the situation he's in.

Like wtf?

[dalton99a]

7. Pathetic

[rickford66]

12. Painful and embarrassing. I had to stop after one minute.

[pangaia]

42. I lasted 1:10.

And i never ever watch or listen to that sick fuck.

[Tommy_Carcetti]

20. I'll save everyone 6 minutes.

"Everything is great now because the water has gone down, here are a bunch of people on stage with me, something something VA health care, thank me everybody, I mean thank you."

[smirkymonkey]

23. Oh puke!

He is repulsive. Was that Betsy fucking DeVos he was congratulating? Or am I imagining it?

[NastyRiffraff]

24. Complete lack of empathy

You can tell when Dump believes what he's saying; he gets animated, his voice rises, he gesticulates wildly. It happens most often when he's angry and cutting people down.

And what's with "when I was a civilian"? He is STILL a civilian; he is not a member of the military, even though he clearly wishes he were. There's a reason that the Commander in Chief is a civilian, but Dump apparently doesn't know this.

[iluvtennis]

9. Thanks for the post...great assessment of empathy

[DesertRat]

10. Josh Marshall nailed it. nt

[marylandblue]

13. It's in fact Narcissistic Personality Disorder

The difference between a sociopath and a narcissist is that the sociopath is a keen observer of human behavior, so they can fake emotions when they need to. But the narcissist is so involved in himself he can't fake it very well and doesn't understand appropriate behavior. When necessary, the narcissist falls back on rote scripts that work most of the time.

Most of the time, when you leave a large gathering of people, like at party or a football game, "have a good time" is an appropriate farewell. But Trump has probably never been to a disaster shelter before, so he doesn't know what to say, he just used an inappropriate script.

[GusBob]

17. Interesting. Is that why he repeats himself so often?

In the Phoenix rally he kept repeating statements, as if to add emphasis, or to fill space.

As if to add emphasis, or fill in space (for example)

Most recently he met with the Finland dude, and he goes something along the lines of 'and it's wonderful that you are buying some great f-18 fighter planes from Boeing, which is a great deal, they are great fighter planes"

I can't stand to listen to him but those are 2 recent speech patterns I have noticed

The other thing I notice is he is great at putting other people down ( Hillary, Obama, the press)
But not so great at propping people up ( other than himself). . I think this is one reason he keeps losing staff

[marylandblue]

26. Yes, he uses the filler to obscure that he doesn't know what he is saying

He only knows that it gets the desired reaction from people who don't realize they are being snowed.

[secondwind]

14. Ivanka is the same way. Remember the SOTU

and the widow of the Navy Seal crying uncontrollably? Ivanka kept clapping and clapping and clapping while the poor woman cried her eyes out. Ivanka then sat down and looked at her, touching ever so lightly the woman's knee, and said "are you alright?" !!!!!!!

Michele would have wrapped her arms around her and hugged her tight.

And that dress!!!!!!! Off the shoulder glitz, knowing you are going to be sitting next to a grieving widow.

[lunatica]

32. You're right

Ivanka was staring at her and her clapping seemed to be just a motion she was continuing unconsciously. The look on her face was fascinated shock at the Navy Seal wife breaking down in front of us.

Yes, Michelle would have wrapped her arms around her and probably cried a bit herself. I know I would have and I would have hugged her hard so she could stay upright and so she could gain a little bit of composure. The wife was so shattered and all Ivanka could do was stare in fascination. Ugh!

[PatrickforO]

15. Each day, Trump does something else that is just downright embarrassing.

Maybe he can't help it, but the Republican party colluded with a hostile foreign power just to win a fucking election. That is not OK and it is TREASON.

Trump, Pence and the rest of his campaign, that group of misfits we can call his 'administration,' and many other Republicans are guilty of collusion with Russia. They forgot their basic morality, their basic loyalty to this country we love, this way of life.

Instead of trying to govern the nation and do what is best for its people, these horrible people have sold out to Charles Koch, the Mercers and other billionaire freaks. They are ripping apart everything that makes this country good, tearing at the social, economic, institutional and spiritual fabric of our nation.

We the people do not want to exist as wage slaves in the living hell of unrestrained capitalism, as Charles Koch wants. He has spent billions of dollars building up a huge stealth party - a fifth column - that is working 24/7/365 to undermine democracy and turn this nation into a capitalist experiment where the people are not permitted to push back.

Trump is a suppurating pustule, but the infection goes through the entire Republican party. Because they aren't Republicans. They are radical libertarians that don't care whether you or I live or die, as long as our hands and backs can be used for profit.

We must all RESIST with every fiber of our beings. Trump and his criminal gang must be brought to justice and our nation back to sanity.

[lunatica]

33. You've expressed the very reason the GOP pretends not to see Trump's crimes.

Very good analysis!

[oppressedproletarian]

36. Thank you PatrickforO

Well said.

And just for the record, I don't care (BIGLY) what the Obscene Toad can or cannot help, or what kind of childhood he had or did not have. THERE IS NO EXCUSE.

[annabanana]

41. Succinct, and quite

likely..
(Rohrabacher, for instance. We know because of that tape with Ryan on it..)

Who knows how many have their hands in those pockets?

[grantcart]

18. If he could read the script he might be able fake it but he can't even do the table read.

[moondust]

19. He's always just used people

to enrich and aggrandize himself. He's not likely to change after all these years.

[Orsino]

21. He fakes everything, and does it poorly.

Were media not so goddamned determined to make him glow, there would be nothing for us to admire--but he is allowed to coast without more than a token effort.

[uppityperson]

25. ++++++++

[rock]

29. Trump is incompetent

as a human being. He just doesn't come up to the minimum standards.

[colsohlibgal]

30. Josh Pretty Much Nails It

A lady I often play against in a tennis league is likely in a lower level within the autism spectrum. You can just see, briefly, her trying to figure out what an appropriate social response is. She mostly gets there but not as seamless as the rest of us.

Trump obviously never gets it, he is a seriously damaged person upstairs, incapable of any real empathy and often just plain mean and selfish. One big fat orange delusional narcissist.

How the non far right Neo Nazis could vote for this totally flawed and dangerous Creep is beyond me.

[lunatica]

34. They're all voting their self-interest or what they think will benefit them

His supporters are his mini-me fans.

[ismnotwasm]

35. When he--apparently seriously--said "My hands are too big"

I had to watch it several times to believe it. He is one fucked up hombre. Money has hidden all kinds of thing about him I think. I've seen interviews where is is relatively normal--it's not like he doesn't have experience in in public life.

[malaise]

39. Just the truth

Rec