General Discussion
Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsSexual assault happens to males also
By other males.
It happened to me.
I was not a child, it didn't go very far, and left no lasting issues for me other than anger and feeling violated.
I'm over it now. It was about 35 years ago.
I am not attempting to take anything away from male on female assault which is far more prevalent than what happened to me.
It's terrible that people do this to others.
MrScorpio
(73,631 posts)The people who would play the blame the victim game are most likely the victimizers themselves.
Skittles
(153,169 posts)whenever I see judges going easy on predators I wonder about their own family members
get the red out
(13,466 posts)No matter who is being attacked this way. It is simply a horrible thing for someone to do someone. It needs to become completely unacceptable in our society.
Skittles
(153,169 posts)those teachers messing around with their students - all the sick joking aside, they are predators
Willie Pep
(841 posts)I think the joke was "oh man you were lucky the hot teacher banged you" or something like that. I think Susan Sarandon played the teacher. It was pretty messed up.
Prison rape jokes are also common and are usually about men getting made "Bubba's girlfriend" in prison. I used to laugh at stuff like that but I do think it influences people to take abuse claims by men less seriously. The premise is that you should have been manly enough to fight and defeat your attackers which is definitely blaming the victim.
byronius
(7,395 posts)Once I found out he read Nixon's speeches to his children at bedtime, I quit. I'm not surprised he made a movie like that; the more money he made, the more creative control he got, and boy does that show. Ugly ugly ugly. I was a fan, and now I wouldn't touch a Sandler movie with a twenty-foot pole.
Prison rape is something I care deeply about. It's never happened to me, but I've read enough to know that it's epidemic and horrifyingly damaging. For a state to allow prisoners in its custody to be harmed in any way is damaging to the state and thereby to the people that make up the state. Such practices are beyond barbaric in a modern culture. From the ancient Assyrians, one expected such atrocity.
We're supposed to be better than that.
Not Ruth
(3,613 posts)irisblue
(32,980 posts)#MeToo has been/is being added to tweets by twitter users as a way to help show the extent of sexual harassment & assault.
That behavior is based on a more powerful individual misusing a perceived less powerful individual. It is about power over another human.
mopinko
(70,120 posts)it took him 15 years to tell me.
screwed him up good. the idea that nobody ever gets over rape has him paralyzed. i know some never do. but i also no some who refused to curl up and die.
lunatica
(53,410 posts)Whether it happens as a hazing right of passage, or as a Navy tradition as the ships cross the equator or in jail or in your own family. It doesn't matter. It's rape and the psychological impact is just as profound.
That's why on DU people won't let a comment of rape in penitentiaries pass as some joke, or some wish pushed on another.
It's one of the reasons I love DU.
Mediumsizedhand
(531 posts)Initech
(100,080 posts)And it's definitely no laughing matter.
samnsara
(17,622 posts)...I am so very sorry that you were a victim.....
InAbLuEsTaTe
(24,122 posts)japple
(9,831 posts)that you were at fault. It was not your fault.
SHRED
(28,136 posts)I learned never to put myself in such a vulnerable situation though.
japple
(9,831 posts)"My skirt was too short." "My blouse was too revealing." "I was walking sexy." "My pants were too tight." "I was distracted." And on...and on...and on...
TheBlackAdder
(28,208 posts)A few men and a few women tried forcing themselves on me, trying various pressure techniques.
I was fortunate to evade them. But, once I did, it made it weird to be seen around them and I avoided them.
It placed me in the position of trying to evade their presence, giving them power over me.
mshasta
(2,108 posts)Living with metal scars and not being able to tell no one about it.
So sorry.
erinlough
(2,176 posts)I didnt, but the way I handled it is interesting even to me. I became hardened. I never flirted again and I was and am very direct. If I saw someone I was interested in I told them I was. Many were uncomfortable with this, but the ones who werent were usually good guys. I chose when and who to have sex with on my terms. Men who couldnt handle that left and that was ok with me. I was told I needed to soften my personality by men in positions of power and I told them I was happy with myself, but thanks for their opinion. I was probably thought of as a bitch, and thats ok with me. I dont know if I would have been different if the rape hadnt happened, my mother was a very strong woman and I might have been like her even without the rape. My bitchyness has served me well.