Prominent or Wealthy Men Often Have Many Consensual Sexual Opportunities.

[MineralMan]

Unfortunately, that can make them think that all women are available to them. That is part of what leads narcissistic men, in particular, to abuse their privilege in unwanted ways. And so many prominent and wealthy men are narcissists. That's one of the reasons we're seeing some such men who we held in high regard being hoist by their own petard right now.

Previously, women who fell victim to such behavior by such men have kept their silence, thinking that they wouldn't be believed or for some other reason. That's changing right now, and many are coming forward with their stories.

We don't often really know those prominent or wealthy men at all. We see their public faces, but not their inner drives. It takes some narcissism to seek and hold many positions. We should not be surprised when people we have respected, admired or even lionized are outed by victims of their baser motivations.

In fact, we should be surprised when they aren't, I think.

Today, we're hearing that Garrison Keillor has been called to account by someone who was sexually victimized by him. Many of us have long enjoyed his public persona, and have held him up as someone who is a "good guy." His public persona exudes that "good guy" image. Now, as with others, we're discovering that we knew him only partially, perhaps.

Narcissism is sort of a requirement for public prominence. It takes a massive ego to rise to those positions. But, there's a dark side to that characteristic. We're learning more about that right now.

We should not be too surprised when the mighty fall. The same things that led to their rise can lead to a sharp fall.

[LisaM]

1. Is it the opportunity. or how people exploit it, which is shame on them.

Between the ages of, say, 18-and 29, I had a pretty good figure and in all likelihood, could probably have had many men "available' to me. Of course, I wanted more than just one night stands, but the larger point is that just because I could have, doesn't mean I should have taken advantage of men, or did.

Seriously, why don't men follow that same path?

[MineralMan]

3. I think most men do follow that path.

Some, men, however, do not. We're learning who some of them are right now.

[PJMcK]

2. Just for the record

Pretty much all men-- and women-- often have many sexual opportunities. It's how we behave that makes all the difference in the world.

Otherwise, you're very wise, MineralMan, as usual.

[MineralMan]

5. That's true. And we choose which

opportunities to follow. When both parties are willing to participate, there is no problem. Often, we pass on such opportunities more often than we do not, as well.

For the people I'm talking about, they believe that opportunities exist where they do not willingly exist. They cannot imagine that anyone would NOT want to participate. So, they proceed, even in the face of a lack of real consent.

Most people do not do that. Narcissists do.

[PJMcK]

7. Good points

I'm startled by some of the stories that are coming out and the details of some men's behavior. It's as if these men never learned any manners.

Ultimately, that's the core issue: People who are polite and respectful generally don't have the problems we're seeing with these miscreants.

Of course, MineralMan, you're writing about people who have personality disorders or worse infirmities. Those people have something missing within them.

[Wellstone ruled]

4. Thanks for the post.

What you say is so true. After sixty five years of employment mostly in Sales,both Business to Business as well as a stint in direct Consumer. Your analogy hits home. Seen it,did not say anything,even swapped Accounts as to not deal with it or mention it.

One can have all the Interpersonal Training in the World,but,training for dealing with someone who is in the position of Power who commits inappropriate acts to their Employees in your presence is a tough one to deal with. When ones livelihood is dependent on the scene you walk into,now that is a reality check.

[MineralMan]

6. Thanks for the reply.

I think it is very difficult for most of us here to imagine doing what some people have done. It is for me. I'm very sad to learn about Garrison Keillor, for example. I would not have expected his name to be one of those we're hearing about. But, I don't really know him, despite having met him once.

I think the lesson is that we should not put prominent public figures on pedestals we create for them. Disappointment is the likely result.

[Wellstone ruled]

8. Yes,one has to be a

realist. People of Power and Position are no different than anyone else,but the use of those abilities seem to create a false sense of control of others by some. Narcissistic as well as what I call, those suffering from Short Mans Disease,seem to be Problem Children when it comes inappropriate interpersonal behavior.