Fraternity 'Mom' Is 'Heartbroken' Over Video That Shows Her Singing N-Word
Source: TPM
The frat house "mom" for the University of Oklahoma's shuttered Sigma Alpha Epsilon chapter said Tuesday she was "heartbroken" that people believed she was a racist after seeing a video of her singing the N-word to the tune of a rap song.
“I have been made aware of a video of me that is circulating on social media and in the news," Beauton Gilbow said in a statement to TV station KFOR. "I am heartbroken by the portrayal that I am in some way racist. I have friends of all race and do not tolerate any form of discrimination in my life."
Amid the fallout from a now-infamous video of frat members singing "There will never be a nigger in SAE," a Vine clip filmed in 2013 surfaced Tuesday that appeared to show Gilbow singing the lyrics to Trinidad James' rap hit "All Gold Everything." The song makes liberal use of the N-word.
Gilbow confirmed in her statement that she was shown singing the song's lyrics in the clip. "I was singing along to a Trinidad song, but completely understand how the video must appear in the context of the events that occurred this week," she said, as quoted by KFOR.
-snip-
Read more: http://talkingpointsmemo.com/livewire/beauton-gilbow-statement-rap-video
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corkhead
(6,119 posts)
Piece of crap!
cstanleytech
(26,295 posts)a word that alot of people like myself object to, same can be said of course for the musician who recorded the song in the first place imo.
muriel_volestrangler
(101,321 posts)If they had been different, there would have been no event at all. The words are racist, whatever context they appear in. She tolerated the discrimination the frat house practised, and she celebrated it.
What doe a 'frat house mom' do anyway? Provide cover for the more questionable activities of a frat house, by making it look as if a mature woman has OKed them? Did she volunteer for that, or is she remunerated in some way?
DonViejo
(60,536 posts)with the job description for a frat Mom:
http://www.fraternitymom.com/
muriel_volestrangler
(101,321 posts)I don't know what's there, but that's not normally a good sign.
A Google search shows it's a paid position.
DonViejo
(60,536 posts)Looks like it's a clearinghouse for women interested in being a frat Mom and frats interested in hiring one
Elmer S. E. Dump
(5,751 posts)Job Description Checklist
● Previous experience as a House Mom
● Full Time Part Time
● Live In Live Out
● 9 month 10 month 11 month 12 month contract
● Excellent communication skills
○ Familiar with email, cell phone and texting
● Event planning and management
○ Assist and teach event planning
○ Creating event themes
○ Working within an event budget
○ Hosting at events
● Kitchen management
○ Hiring, training and managing kitchen staff
○ Creating and adhering to food budget
○ Creating diverse and healthy menus
○ Kitchen inspections, maintenance and repairs
○ Order or purchase all food
● Property Management
○ Daily operations of a large residential facility
○ Coordinate inspections as required by university, local state and federal agencies
○ Interaction with repair personnel and contractors
○ Hiring, training and managing household staff including housekeepers, groundskeepers and maintenance staff
○ Track household expenses and manage budgets
○ Process payroll
○ Oversee opening and closing of chapter house
○ Ensure all health code, fire regulations and inspections are met
○ Recommends capital improvements, household repairs and replacements
○ Requests required contractor bids for large projects for HCB
○ Use personal vehicle for errands and household purchases
● Chapter Relationship
○ Meet with chapter officers and committees as required
○ Provide sufficient leadership and authority
○ Etiquette lessons
○ Open door policy with hours ____ - ______
○ Attend all meals to interact with chapter members
○ Attend chapter activities including Greek Week and Homecoming events
yurbud
(39,405 posts)clean up after spoiled, upper middle class kids who stopped emotionally maturing in middle school...
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)Relevant lyrics passage starts at :30
Gold all in my chain, gold all in my ring
Gold all in my watch
Don't believe me, just watch
Nigga nigga nigga
Don't believe me, just watch
Don't believe me, just watch
Nigga nigga nigga
By well-known racist lyricist Trinidad James.
muriel_volestrangler
(101,321 posts)while her employers were being racists. I wouldn't believe her if she was saying that - would you?
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)This is what she is saying:
"I was singing along to a Trinidad song, but completely understand how the video must appear in the context of the events that occurred this week"
So, yes, she is claiming that she was singing (it's not really "sung" in any event) the Trinidad James lyrics. That's exactly what she is claiming.
In the video in question, which is a short clip, the Trinidad James song has proceeded from the chorus to the second verse, and she appears to be about three lines behind in reading the lyrics, stumbling over the line about the gold watch.
I'm not sure I understand what you are suggesting.
So I wonder (a) did you watch the video, and (b) do you hear the loud music in the background?
It is possible that there was a video of her saying that, and that the Trinidad James song was added to the video later, but that would seem like an odd thing to do.
muriel_volestrangler
(101,321 posts)just the pictures of her looking like she says the n word several times (because they come from broadcast TV, I guess).
I can't imagine what the 'context' would be, apart from the frat boys egging her on to say the N word repeatedly.
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)muriel_volestrangler
(101,321 posts)Time for me to get rid of NoScript.
OK, so she's saying it more times than is in the lyrics (that you've given, anyway), so she's really just saying the N word for the hell of it, rather than singing along. And laughing about it.
snooper2
(30,151 posts)And I can tell you exactly what happened..
They hanging around, drinking, yuppie assholes thinking they are "hard" and "cool"...
Hey- Let's get House Granny to sing this and we'll make a Vine video that would go VIRAL!
Sure...come on...
rest is history
Kelvin Mace
(17,469 posts)"-er" at the end of the word, not "-ga"
Maybe it is just my ear.
hfojvt
(37,573 posts)most white people NOT understanding any distinction between -er and -ga, and think -ga is just a slang mispronunciation of -er.
AnnieBW
(10,429 posts)Buy the beer so that the underage frat guys won't get busted.
Sweep up the used condoms.
Get the girls out of the house before Campus Security shows up.
Ms. Toad
(34,075 posts)
I'm really kind of flabbergasted at how she would expect someone to see/hear her sing n*r, n*r, n*r, n*r, n*r, n*r, n*r, n*r, n*r, n*r - repeatedly - to think anything other than that she is, at a minimum, extremely racially insensitive.
Really? Are you 5 years old?
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)You will note that the video clip has loud music playing.
The song is:
"All Gold Everything"
Trinidad James
Gold all in my chain, gold all in my ring
Gold all in my watch
Don't believe me, just watch
Nigga nigga nigga
Don't believe me, just watch
Don't believe me, just watch
Nigga nigga nigga
Don't believe me, just watch
Don't believe me, just watch
Gold all in my chain, gold all in my ring
Gold all in my watch, don't believe me just watch
http://genius.com/1387527/Trinidad-james-all-gold-everything-remix/Gold-all-in-my-chain-gold-all-in-my-ring-gold-all-in-my-watch
YOHABLO
(7,358 posts)listen to these days? What ever happen to music? So pathetic the "taste" that has developed. We have young uneducated black dudes (so called Rap ''artist"
calling each other the N-word. One thing I have learned is it's okay if black kids want to call each other the N-word, but white kids sure as hell should never use it. EVER !
Erich Bloodaxe BSN
(14,733 posts)had her saying the n-word 7 or 8 times in a row. You keep showing a mere 3 times repetition for the 'chorus' line. Is there somewhere in the song where he sings it 7 or 8 times in a row? If not, that doesn't really seem to be 'singing along'.
Ms. Toad
(34,075 posts)jtuck004
(15,882 posts)She really believes what she is saying. And there are a lot like her, here too. Millions of people who are comfortable letting this happen, as long as it's "not them". Which is, after all, the only way people like this keep hurting others.
And here is our biography...
Mistakes Were Made (But not By Me)
Carol Tavris, Elliot Aronson
It will be one of the best books you ever read, as long as you understand they are talking about all of us.
zeemike
(18,998 posts)I am sure the right will crowd fund her to compensate for the grave injustice she had to face.
oldandhappy
(6,719 posts)ShoreLiberal
(16 posts)It's probably unfair to judge that lady based upon a 5 second clip of what appears to be a life spanning about 6+ decades. Is she a racist? Maybe. Is she a member of the Rainbow Coalition? Maybe. You cannot fairly tell by that vine. In all likelihood she was being videotaped singing the ridiculous lyrics of a song glorifying the use of that horrible word because the hypocrisy of it was funny. What makes it funny is that an old white lady is not supposed to say that word, while the artist's record lable directly markets his music to the white community including a fraternity of young white people who are supposed to enjoy and buy the music exploiting that word. That nanosecond of that lady's life should not be used by the left to paint an entire group of people as racists any more than a picture of a hoodie wearing black teen holding a gun should be used by the right to portray that all young black males are dangerous criminals. Sadly, the viral video of Frat Mom detracted from the SAE bus trip video which was truly worthy of all the attention it received. The only purpose the Frat Mom video truly served was to give the center right, the people we are trying to win over to our side, a reason to buy into the false belief that the left is an overly sensitive, whining and judgmental lot. Or are we?
uppityperson
(115,677 posts)
ShoreLiberal
(16 posts)I've been reading DU for a long time. I enjoy it tons. I suppose the "center right" would be the people that are detached from the political process until the days leading up to the elections. They don't watch Fox or MSNBC. They won't read or post on this site unless it is shared on their Facebook. They are people who should be clearly democrats / green party types, but don't know they should be. They are part of the people who realize that the republicans are even too nutty to affiliate with anymore. Perhaps Eisenhower republicans? They are the middle class that go republican because that's what their father did when it was okay to be republican. They vote against their best interest but don't know why the do. They may have an idea about this story but are wise enough to know that a 5 second vine is an unfair way to judge a person or a group of people. They are the people that have adopted the 90's anti-left slogan "political correctness" and don't want to worry about things unimportant in their lives. They support what happened to SAE, but would be offended by using that event as a reason to blast an old lady based upon a 5 second vine where she is openly mocking a song dripping with the n-word.
geek tragedy
(68,868 posts)Demit
(11,238 posts)She's giggling as she repeats the words. She knows what she's doing. I'll bet she thinks she's being "naughty," and she is utterly delighted to be.
I disagree vehemently with your last sentence. No, the purpose of the video is to shame white people who think they are safe in being racist around their white friends. Oh, they're so tearful when they're found out and forced to see just how they look. I absolutely don't understand your concern for the twisted use the "center right" will make of something.
I can't believe you, in your SECOND post on this site, would warn progressives/liberals/DUers about being "overly sensitive, whining and judgmental."
ShoreLiberal
(16 posts)Actually, the overly judgmental thing was part of my first post, which your post clearly exemplifies. It appears as though you are prepared to make a judgment on a person based upon a 5 second vine. I thought we on the left were for fairness and justice. We are not supposed to judgmental without fully analyzing the facts. Just take a moment and listen to the song that was playing in the background. Read the lyrics posted herein. If Frat- Mom was pumping her fist on the SAE bus, you are right. But that's not the case here. All we have in this video is a woman singing along with horrible lyrics.
As the document depicted in your profile picture states, people are innocent until proven guilty. It would appear that you have a pretty restrictive view of our First Amendment rights. As a previous poster notes, please tell us who, in your America, is allowed to sing along with which song. Who is allowed to mock it? Who decides which age, race, religion is allowed to sing a song or who is permitted to point out its stupidity? That is the problem with your position that people in the center will never understand, regardless of how well intentioned your outrage is. The point of my post is that we on the progressive side should take a moment to think how to best direct our outrage so that it is understood by the mainstream. Clearly this Frat-Mom's video does not further any progressive agenda, but in all likelihood, achieves quite the opposite result e.g. the presence of an "overly judgmental" left.
uppityperson
(115,677 posts)'"overly judgmental" left' sounds like that old "how dare you call out my bigotry you are supposed to be open minded" ploy.
ShoreLiberal
(16 posts)Your view iseems pretty extreme. Can we go over your entire life and pick out 5 seconds in which you were imperfect, post it on the web then have millions pass judgment on you? Does not sound like a very liberal ideal to me.
uppityperson
(115,677 posts)"overly sensitive, whining and judgmental lot" we libruls are, eh? Shore nuf.
ShoreLiberal
(16 posts)Not all of us. But those who are, are doing the progressive movement a regressive disservice.
Kali
(55,014 posts)
Demit
(11,238 posts)So it only took her 5 seconds to do it. What does that change?
Do you really mean to say that your mythical "people in the center" don't understand the objective wrongness of what she did? What exactly would they be on the fence about there? What haven't they made their minds up about, that they have to be coaxed along?
And by the way, regarding First Amendment rights, the govt didn't arrest her, so her rights are intact. As has to be pointed out, ad nauseam, freedom of speech does not protect you from being criticized for the things you say.
I think you are being too cute for words, to call yourself progressive. I don't think you belong here.
Judi Lynn
(160,545 posts)ShoreLiberal
(16 posts)I thought only the right reduced every issue to black or white (pun not intended). I'm sure there is a five second span of your life where you objectively said something that could be construed as patently offensive, maybe even criminal, without actually intending that five seconds to be the definition of who you are as a person. Truth is, every issue has a grey area, and it has always been the left that acknowledges that grey areas exist and proper thought is required before jumping to any conclusions. But I can appreciate how easy it is to jump to the conclusion in that vine.
I thank you for the 8th grade civics lesson on the Constitution. I know its purpose. I know who it governs. My point was that somebody who proclaims to love the Constitution to the point that the document is used as that person's photo identification lead me to the incorrect assumption that you are so guided by its principles to the point that you would apply it in your own judgment of others. It was not a First Amendment point, it was a reference to the Constitutional principle that one is innocent until proven guilty after having an opportunity to defend oneself against their accuser. I acknowledge that I was wrong in my belief.
If you don't believe there is a center subject to influence you are wasting your time on this board and in all of your political activism. The center exists, and they are the ones who decide elections and ultimately are the ones needed to push a liberal agenda forward in this country.
It appears that you are the keeper of the gate on this site dedicated to liberal and progressive causes such as freedom of thought and expression. It also appears that I am not the correct type of progressive for you. To ease your fear just know that since 2002 I've donated enough time, money and effort to liberal causes and candidates than you could imagine. Following Gov. Dean's plan, I've run for and won in local elections in my very conservative town. My foray into this board leads me to the belief that if half the effort spent ranting on this forum was spent in actual activism, the DU agenda would be much better served. Give it a try.
Demit
(11,238 posts)You are, however, very long-winded.
ShoreLiberal
(16 posts)As anticipated.
MADem
(135,425 posts)This thread has some posts in it that stink on ice.
Alkene
(752 posts)so I have about the same exposure to historical context and social responsibility.
We apparently differ in that I wouldn't tolerate music with those lyrics and would either remove myself from the situation or, if it were within my power, require a different selection.
I don't think expecting the same good sense from 'Mom" is being overly sensitive, whining and judgmental.
But perhaps not everybody has the same moral fortitude as you. So you are judging her based upon your "same exposure to historical context and social responsibility". How do you even know what this woman was exposed to in her life? Seems pretty judgmental to me. Again, you are feeding into the negative stereotypes of the left branded effectively by the right.
Alkene
(752 posts)You are a valued source of wisdom for me, so please stay on the line and a representative will be you shortly.
mac56
(17,569 posts)
tblue37
(65,408 posts)
TBF
(32,067 posts)
appalachiablue
(41,146 posts)sorority housemother with fondness & respect. Back then they kept things going at the house not like this vulgar mess.
NCjack
(10,279 posts)Snow Leopard
(348 posts)Then why do many of their songs contain the word?
madokie
(51,076 posts)no if, and or buts about it
christx30
(6,241 posts)along to "Gold Digger", am I supposed to sing the radio edit lyrics to avoid being thought of as racist? Or can I sing the real words? Or am I just now allowed to listen to that music at all? Maybe just stay in my own lane with some Aerosmith or something like that?
If they aren't her words, and she's singing along and having a good time, I don't see the problem, and can't fault her.
Guaguacoa
(271 posts)am latino (mexican) and don't get the outrage if she is singing the lyrics. If there is outrage it should be against the song to begin with. Then again white people seem to find racism in everything other white people do and none in what anyone else does.
madokie
(51,076 posts)no matter what. You do as you think is right
christx30
(6,241 posts)people are being hurt by unfounded accusations of racism. This woman is having her reputation dragged through the mud.
This seems like a nice woman that was having a good time with her charges, and she sang along to a racist song and now everyone is calling her a Grand Dragon.
I mean, consider the alternatives. She sits there with an uncomfortable look on her face while the song is playing, everyone thinks she's uncomfortable with "that culture".
She asks the kids to not play the music. Again, everyone thinks she hates rap, and, therefore, racist (This happened to me in highschool. I very publically hated rap, and I was called racist).
Or she listens to it, has a good time, and sings along.
She seems like a sweet lady that doesn't deserve anything that's happening to her. She has absolutely nothing to apologize for.
Warpy
(111,277 posts)you are a racist. Now we all know it and you're just going to have to cope with that.
Dawson Leery
(19,348 posts)They must be taught that there will be no tolerance for this nonsense.
Guaguacoa
(271 posts)selective outrage to me. I'm mexican and spic is offensive no matter who says it.
Vinca
(50,278 posts)you probably are.
alcibiades_mystery
(36,437 posts)
Judi Lynn
(160,545 posts)It's been far too long, already.
alcibiades_mystery
(36,437 posts)Shaking my damn head.
AngryAmish
(25,704 posts)Get old white women to say really racist shit.
At a minimum it is cultural appropriation.
White people should not listen to or perform hip hop.
Matariki
(18,775 posts)are you being serious?
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)
Skittles
(153,169 posts)I only make and follow rules for my own behavior.
You'll have to figure out yours.
Skittles
(153,169 posts)jberryhill
(62,444 posts)Nope.
Never got into that business either.
Skittles
(153,169 posts)yes indeed
Guaguacoa
(271 posts)st. patricks day? Just curious since you are making the rules.
I disagree with your rule anyway. Either be outraged at the song or not at all. If it's a nationally released song it's going to be sung to. Otherwise it just makes people on our side (the left) especially the white people that are outraged look like a bunch of knee jerk, selective racism buffoons.
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)The only person I make rules for is myself, so you are free to "disagree" with a rule that has nothing to do with you.
Guaguacoa
(271 posts)"White people should not listen to or perform hip hop."
You replied to that by saying it's a practical rule to follow.
It clearly says white people, not you yourself.
I now realize you run your mouth without owning what you say. Not to mention you are making a rule for "white People".
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)But, absolutely, I believe it is a practical rule to follow.
Are you a follower of mine or something?
Response to jberryhill (Reply #116)
Post removed
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)I said, "That's a practical rule to follow."
The only person whose behavior I make rules for is me.
Sorry you must resort to some odd form of gay slur.
Guaguacoa
(271 posts)type stuff? Should we latinos not listen to or perform anything but latino music? That alone sounds racist to me.
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)You are now the third in line to believe that I make rules for the conduct of people other than myself.
on edit: excuse me. second in line. I didn't realize you had come back for a second helping of not having a clue that how I conduct myself has nothing to do with you.
Guaguacoa
(271 posts)"White people should not listen to or perform hip hop."
You replied to that by saying it's a practical rule to follow.
It clearly says white people, not you yourself.
I now realize you run your mouth without owning what you say.
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)Unless you are taking orders from me, I have not the faintest idea how you turn that into a statement applicable to anyone else.
Guaguacoa
(271 posts)Nobody said anyone is taking your orders and obeying them and I am not white so your rule does not apply to me anyway.
There's a difference in someone spouting said rule and anyone following them. I commented you stating it, period. You denied you said it and now you are deflecting. Now go away and think about that for a while and you might figure it out.
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)Then you will also learn what Angry Amish said and what I responded.
Guaguacoa
(271 posts)I am putting you on ignore anyway. You appear to be racist toward white people, I don't like any racists against any race. Adios.
NaturalHigh
(12,778 posts)That's the craziest comment I have read today.
bravenak
(34,648 posts)Makes no sense.
PersonNumber503602
(1,134 posts)christx30
(6,241 posts)If someone were to say "black people should not listen to or perform country music." someone would call that ridiculous, insulting, and racist.
In the 50's, if whites did not start playing rock music because it was dominated by black musicians, we would not have the Beatles, Buddy Holly, Aerosmith, ect. People should branch out as much as they want to, and explore music that's in their heart.
This woman was having a good time, and someone got it on video. If she just sat there, someone would have posted the video as "Look at the whitest person ever" and everyone would have laughed at her. But beause she joined in, she's called a racist. No way for her to win at all.
I'm going to give her the benefit of the doubt until I hear Paula Deen stuff or see some white sheets.
Guaguacoa
(271 posts)to someone singing along with lyrics from a nationally released released song written by a black person? Would you be just as offended with black people singing along to a white person's song repeating "redneck"? Of course not, it's selective racism and your comparison is a bad one. Would you would be outraged by me, as a mexican, singing the lyrics to the same song as the woman? Are only certain people allowed to sing along with songs? Maybe you should let everyone know because I have not seen the list or if my name is on it.
snooper2
(30,151 posts)
Wash. state Desk Jet
(3,426 posts)bravenak
(34,648 posts)I know that song, and the parodies. It says nigga like 47000 times. I believe her.
kwassa
(23,340 posts)Binary thinking. Something is either right or wrong. Nothing in-between.
bravenak
(34,648 posts)I bet nan one of these folks understand the song. In that song nigga is not a bad thing.
kwassa
(23,340 posts)much easier to resort to over-simplified analysis.
bravenak
(34,648 posts)I don't see color like you racists.
kwassa
(23,340 posts)otherwise it doesn't exist, like that tree that falls in the forest.
bravenak
(34,648 posts)Only certain people see it and we all know that it's in Their minds. They WANT to see it.
kwassa
(23,340 posts)time to get out the shillelagh.
bravenak
(34,648 posts)I want the gold.
kwassa
(23,340 posts)That's why they went to cold-ass Alaska in the first place.
bravenak
(34,648 posts) kwassa
(23,340 posts)just in time for climate change to flood the city.
See if you like hip boots.
I hate the heat more than the snow. Besides, climate change will be better for us that many others. Glad I came early, before the rush. It will probably be nice and temperate up here before I die.
kwassa
(23,340 posts)otherwise, when the gulf of Alaska starts rising, those king crabs will be nibbling your toes in your living room.
bravenak
(34,648 posts)I'll find me a place on Denali. Or Susitna. Little cabin where I can prospect gold. They haven't stopped selling gold claims yet. Maybe it's time to think about it.
kwassa
(23,340 posts)
They use machines now, silly. I'll just birth more children if I need workers. I only have the two and I'm 34. Plenty of time. My mother still has to use birth control. 
Response to bravenak (Reply #79)
Long Drive This message was self-deleted by its author.
freshwest
(53,661 posts)bravenak
(34,648 posts)At least we get to hang with Hawaii!
freshwest
(53,661 posts)
The dude is so Zen!
Guaguacoa
(271 posts)irishmen or is that racism?
kwassa
(23,340 posts)Guaguacoa
(271 posts)always when they are racist.
freshwest
(53,661 posts)Guaguacoa
(271 posts)directed at those white people say it should be directed at.
kwassa
(23,340 posts)Response to kwassa (Reply #89)
Post removed
kwassa
(23,340 posts)I would never use the word myself.
I'm white, married to a black woman.
I am aware that it is used in a different manner in the hiphop world, as a sign of affection rather than insult, and I would disagree that the word is available for anyone to use. I don't go around quoting hiphop songs, though, like this woman seemed to.
I have no reason to want to use the word, and I realize how upsetting it is for others to hear than word, so I just stay away from it.
Guaguacoa
(271 posts)If the word is offensive then it's offensive. Don't want to hear it then don't release it on a national released song. Either that or don't sell it to white people. To me it's ridiculous. If this woman buys this song or it's playing on the radio then she has every right to sing along to it.
This stuff really flushes any thought that "progressives" have on everyone being treated equal down the drain. I don't want to hear "but everyone is not being treated equal" because that's the whole point. Either you are for that or against it, it's not a selective thing. Who cares if the other side is not for it? If my side is not then what am I doing here? Either a word is offensive or it's not. Some black people do not like to hear it from black people either. I tend to side with them, if the word is offensive then only let offensive people use it. If I hear a latino singing or listening to racist words toward us I will consider it just as offensive as another race person using them. Selective outrage is the utmost in hpocrisy.
Like to call your friends that? Then do, but putting it out in a song changes the game.
kwassa
(23,340 posts)There is not one universally accepted definition of the n-word. The meaning depends on context; who is using it, and in what way.
The same holds true for the definition of racism. The meaning of the word has evolved over time to mean what institutional racism used to indicate. For racism to be racism, power is a required element. Many accept that, others stick with the old, and still dictionary-current, definition of the word. I think that is the definition that you are using.
I am not offended by this woman using the n-word, when I've heard the context in which it was used.
Guaguacoa
(271 posts)does not mean it is. It seems to me some white people have a floating meaning of racism, that bothers me. Racism is thinking another race is inferior to theirs. It does not mean if someone disagrees with me, as a minority, they are racists. That's why it begins with the word rac(e).
Definition of RACISM (webster)
1
the belief that certain races of people are by birth and nature superior to others <Hitler's declaration of his belief in a “master race” was an indication of the inherent racism of the Nazi movement>
2 hatred of or discrimination against a person or persons based on their race
The word as not evolved, SOME have evolved in their use of it and it's not always correct. A group of people can't just take a word and change the meaning on their own. My point is it's about race, a whole race period.
It's like that emblem that was found on wrapping paper that resembled a REVERSE swastika. The nazi's do not own that emblem, but I can understand the hurt. The backwards swastica is a buddhist symbol that has nothing to do with nazi's. I have been to about 16 countries, japan being one, and it is many places. Yet people are so easy to point fingers and call racism that somehows the "backwards swastica" has evolved to symbolize nazi's and in reality it has not evolved at all. It's mostly a certain segment of white people that are looking for any reason to call other white people racist while ignoring real racism in other areas.
http://www.japanese-buddhism.com/swastika.html
stone space
(6,498 posts)
Both are objectionable.
stone space
(6,498 posts)AUTOMATED MESSAGE: Results of your alert
Mail Message
On Thu Mar 12, 2015, 04:18 PM you sent an alert on the following post:
Just agreeing with you my friend.
http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1014&pid=1037807
REASON FOR ALERT
This post is disruptive, hurtful, rude, insensitive, over-the-top, or otherwise inappropriate.
YOUR COMMENTS
"when illegals get to vote"
No human being is illegal. Drop the I-Word.
JURY RESULTS
A randomly-selected Jury of DU members completed their review of this alert at Thu Mar 12, 2015, 04:27 PM, and voted 4-3 to HIDE IT.
Juror #1 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: No explanation given
Juror #2 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: The poster is is wrong but...that's the posters opinion. This is a forum, learn to alert.
Juror #3 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: No explanation given
Juror #4 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: Not the best word choice, but not hide-worthy.
Juror #5 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: No explanation given
Juror #6 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: I did a quick history search on this poster. Use of "illegals" is part of a pattern for this poster.
Juror #7 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: No explanation given
Thank you.
24601
(3,962 posts)at a Midwestern liberal Arts College, is a Phi Delta Theta.
I do have the interview of two recent SAEs from that chapter at OU.
These two recent graduates are African American and without reservation, that stand with Mom B, as Mrs Gilbow is known.
Here are their words: [http://www.cnn.com/2015/03/11/us/oklahoma-fraternity-house-mom/]
"That word needs to die," James told CNN Tonight. "With that being said, I don't believe that Mom B. has hatred in her heart. I was there with her for four years. She took great care of me ... she cared about me, she cares about my family. She had pictures of me, my wife, my children on the entryway table in that house. Mom B means a lot to me."
and
Jonathon Davis, the first African-American member of the campus' SAE chapter, also defended "Mom B."
"I wouldn't even hesitate for a split second to say that Mom B. is undoubtedly not a racist," Davis said.
"I see her as being caught up in the moment. She does like to mix it up socially, and she likes to have fun with the guys and their dates they bring over to the house. And I see this as maybe her getting caught away with the moment."
So I stand with these two gentlemen who understand Mrs. B better than anyone on DU who hasn't met her personally.
Goodnight my friends.
kwassa
(23,340 posts)
ScreamingMeemie
(68,918 posts)kwassa
(23,340 posts)and a very interesting twist on this whole story.
It is fascinating how devastated they are by this whole chain of events.
ScreamingMeemie
(68,918 posts)You really could feel their emotion.
I think she did a really, really stupid thing and is pretty clueless.
Guaguacoa
(271 posts)Last edited Thu Mar 12, 2015, 04:37 PM - Edit history (1)
make me stupid and clueless? It's a word they use on each other, but it's also a bigoted and stereotypical term used to demean someone. I, as a mexican, would not use it. Does being stupid and clueless by singing along with stupid lyrics apply to everyone, or just white people?
I'm being serious, I don't get the outrage over singing to a song lyrics. It's not like it's an underground, racist song.
kwassa
(23,340 posts)I think you'd have a fight on your hands.
Guaguacoa
(271 posts)I know you are going to say it's different, but it's still a bigoted word used to insult and belittle someone just as is the n word and racist words against latinos such as spic and wetback. If I sang along with a song repeating this word as dark skinned person nothing would happen. If white people sang a song with spic and wetback in them there would probably be an outrage and this is along the same lines as us using redneck, or wop with italian heritage, etc. It's a double standard and one that should not be accepted by any liberal worth his salt. In the places I lived in the us there was a lot of racism between latinos and blacks, far more than other neighborhoods, but it is ignored as it does not involve white people. THAT is using racism for political or personal gain only.
I'm an old fashioned liberal. I'm against war no matter who is in office, I'm against racism no matter who does it, I'm against calling racism to promote my personal agenda. Only when it exists. It seems like there are not a lot of us left, people are now against war....when the other side is in. Against racism.....when it involves white people. Against young black people dying.......only if it's at the hands of white people. For the rights of latinos........only if white people are involved. Go into the latino communities, a segement (mostly a bad segment criminal illegals) terrorizing and robbing latinos and nobody cares as it's not white people doing it.
If latino's in the us get the majority vote then watch out, they will be beholding to nobody as they are ignored by both sides. We plan on moving there in a few months.
stone space
(6,498 posts)Is this some sort of performance art?
stone space
(6,498 posts)AUTOMATED MESSAGE: Results of your alert
Mail Message
On Thu Mar 12, 2015, 05:28 PM you sent an alert on the following post:
Ha, I messed that one up and edited my post. Redneck is the word.
http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1014&pid=1037967
REASON FOR ALERT
This post is disruptive, hurtful, rude, insensitive, over-the-top, or otherwise inappropriate.
YOUR COMMENTS
"mostly a bad segment criminal illegals"
No human being is illegal. Drop the I-Word.
JURY RESULTS
A randomly-selected Jury of DU members completed their review of this alert at Thu Mar 12, 2015, 06:01 PM, and voted 2-5 to LEAVE IT ALONE.
Juror #1 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: I agree about the 'illegals' word; but also with the stereotyping of many on the 'left' only caring about racism and misdeeds by white people. (Easily contradicted; few on the left will fail to criticize Clarence Thomas, Allen West or Bobby Jindal, for example!) Also, the poster uses a large number of ethnic slurs as examples to make his point - not necessary! Hide this.
Juror #2 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: Not worth a hide.
Juror #3 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: interesting, wrong in places.
Juror #4 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: The alert comment is weird. But this person's "black people only care about black people dying or latinos only when it's at the hands of whites" make this a hideable offence. It's apparent that this person means illegal immigrants when they say illegals. Odd that was the phrase that made the alerter alert.
Juror #5 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: No explanation given
Juror #6 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: I agree that no human being is 'illegal.' I also believe your characterization is taken out of context. While the use of the word illegals to describe the undocumented is suspect, in this situation I believe this alert is unfounded.
Juror #7 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: No explanation given
Thank you.
Guaguacoa
(271 posts)they are unacceptable to everyone. This selective racism that gets directed toward someone singing lyrics to a well known song and not to the song itself just makes the left look bad, period. Some can deny it all they want but it's true.
I posted in a thread one time talking about racists and I said it's hypocrisy to hold someone like paula deen responsible to something she said 20 years ago and blindly accept byrd an ex kkk member. Anyone that hates enough to join the kkk is far worse than deen. I'm not saying she's not a racist, but it's selective finger pointing. I was attacked left and right by white people telling me what was racist. I'm a person of color, dark skinned mexican and THIS bothers me more than anything about the people on OUR side. People that cannot possibly know this type of racism (skin color) telling us what we are supposed to think.
Not to mention the line of thought that only white people are racist. I've lived in the us in several places and guess what? The racism and bigotry I have experienced has not been from white people. Even in the south, arkansas.
MADem
(135,425 posts)Personal anecdotes don't fly. We don't communicate by skype in this forum.
YOU can't tell another person how they are "supposed to" feel. I don't care what YOUR personal circumstances are--you check your own self, but don't ever think you have the right or the ability to tell others what they are permitted to think.
You are way out of line, here.
MADem
(135,425 posts)In other words, she's been pegged for what she is.
Guaguacoa
(271 posts)the lyrics? MS in charge, am I as a mexican (dark skinned) allowed?
MADem
(135,425 posts)You're being rude and disruptive and most definitely abusive--I'd like to know WHY.
You need to check yourself and stop accusing me of racism--because that IS what you are doing with that nasty post.
christx30
(6,241 posts)you don't know, and accusing her of being a racist based on 5 seconds of video. We could find any 5 second period in your life and make any kind of accusations about you that we wanted to. "She burped during dinner? ugh."
This isn't another Paula Deen thing. This is a person having fun with her charges. She sings along with an offensive song, but so was everyone else there. Black members of that frat have said that they know her very well and she is NOT racist. I refuse to condemn this person. It's just as wrong as anything the right does.
MADem
(135,425 posts)I don't have to "know" her--I can judge her by the RACIST SHIT coming outta her MOUTH.
You need to check yourself.
There are no "black members of that frat." That's what the fucking song is about. How there will NEVER be black members of that frat.
You are in the wrong place, here.
24601
(3,962 posts)MADem
(135,425 posts)to make the story about themselves or crap on an old lady? So she treated two guys decently--that doesn't mean she deserves a prize. Isn't her JOB to treat all the students decently?
This kind of shit just needs to stop.
24601
(3,962 posts)only basis from which to draw inferences are news reports.
The CNN interviews are significant for several reasons. http://www.cnn.com/2015/03/11/us/oklahoma-fraternity-house-mom/
Objectively,
1. It presented the views of two people who know Mrs. Gilbow (Mom B) personally.
2. They knew her over an extended period of time.
3. That they are African American members of OU's SAE Chapter is important for two reasons: First, they can speak 1st hand whether they were subject to racist behavior by SAE and/or OU, and second - whether they observed racist behavior that targeted any other students, faculty, or staff.
4. Since they have already graduated, it is less likely that their statements have been coerced.
5. Their existence as SAE/OU Alumni answers the question of whether SAE prohibited black membership at OU.
Subjectively,
The content and tone of their statements strikes me as honest. It appeared to me that neither one wanted the spotlight, but that they judged it a moral imperative to describe Mrs. Gilbow and that their commitment to the truth was more important than jumping on the bandwagon to reinforce the popular media spin.
MADem
(135,425 posts)taught at not just one, but a number of fraternities, if institutionalized racism didn't exist.
Just because, at one single fraternity, two black students avoided harm or insult, doesn't mean that the rest of the rotten organization gets a pass.
And even Strom Thurmond didn't act like a racist 24 hours a day. I'm sure that he treated the black staffers in his offices (and he had several) just fine. But that didn't mean that at his core he wasn't one.
24601
(3,962 posts)and supporting two African Americans who were SAE members at OU. You may disbelieve them if you choose. Wouldn't it be ironic if, in the stampede to condemn all SAE, they received better treatment from that very fraternity than from DU posters.
So, if you KNOW it, as opposed you've inferred it based on open source press and internet posts, what is your personal experience with SAE?
But as I said, my comment was about the two graduates who actually know Mrs. Gilbow well. Please produce just one real person who knows her and can attest that the two graduates are wrong.
The individual you bring forward should have witnessed Mrs. Gilbow's racist behavior in person. I'm not asking for anything elaborate, just a first-person eye witness account.
MADem
(135,425 posts)Yeah, they ARE a racist outfit. This is not a secret, nor is it a surprise.
Take off the doggone blinders, and stop embarrassing yourself:
http://www.slate.com/articles/life/inside_higher_ed/2015/03/behind_the_chant_discrimination_at_oklahoma_s_sae_chapter_goes_deeper_than.html
The Ugly, Racist, Deadly History of Sigma Alpha Epsilon
The fraternity’s problems aren’t limited to the University of Oklahoma or the South. And they stretch back decades.
DeVotie was one of the founders of Sigma Alpha Epsilon, the only national fraternity founded in the antebellum South. A chaplain at Alabama's Fort Morgan at the time of his death, he became the fraternity’s—and some argue, the country's—first Civil War casualty. Nearly 75 other SAE members would die before the war’s end, the vast majority of them fighting for the Confederate South. When the survivors returned home, many found their universities burned to the ground and the 15 chapters of the fraternity in ruins.
SAE spent the next three decades rebuilding its ranks, eventually establishing chapters at Northern colleges. But their presence there among the well-established Northern fraternities was an uneasy one, so two members wrote a defiant march in which, as SAE’s manual describes it, the fraternity “entered, met and held at bay its rivals in the North.” It was the first of many songs SAE would produce, earning it the nickname “the singing fraternity.”
There's nothing quaint about the nicknames SAE has these days—on many campuses people say the initials stand for “sexual assault expected” or “same assholes everywhere.” The fraternity is also known as the one in which members are most likely to die. And now it may be called the most racist. .... SAE has frequently been accused of racist and discriminatory behavior over the years. Now the largest fraternity in the country, SAE seems to have played a disproportionate role in some of the most offensive incidents in recent decades, yet it remains a house in good standing at more than 200 campuses....
Much more--all UGLY as hell--at the link. Unless you think mocking MLK's birthday and having "Jungle Fever" parties is just good clean fun? Screaming racial invective at black students and beating up Jews is what? College pranks?
Stop defending the indefensible.
24601
(3,962 posts)antebellum history with you.
christx30
(6,241 posts)But she certainly doesn't deserve the witch hunt that's happening to her.
MADem
(135,425 posts)I don't see anyone chasing her down the street in a squad car and shooting her.
yurbud
(39,405 posts)Spider_Mann
(40 posts)
Nye Bevan
(25,406 posts)does that make them a misogynist?
christx30
(6,241 posts)do they actually want to hold your hand?
catbyte
(34,403 posts)I can't bring myself to say that word, no matter what the context. If African Americans want to own it, fine, but I, as as an Ojibwe/Irish/French person, have no right to say it.
Manifestor_of_Light
(21,046 posts)that black rappers can be just as misogynistic (bitches and hos) and materialistic (bling and fast cars) as rich white guys, emulating the worst of white culture, and white grandmas can sing along with them and be completely oblivious to the horrible values espoused in the rapper's video, and then be racist on top of that???