Woman Outraged No One Keeping Her from Saying "Merry Christmas"

[LS_Editor]

Well, Merry Christmas. Wait, did I just violate the TOS at DU? Because we are all Christmas-haters here... Or something...

War on Christmas stupidity... These satire sites either have it very easy or very hard...


Woman Outraged No One Keeping Her from Saying "Merry Christmas"

PENSACOLA, FLORIDA (The Nil Admirari) - Today, avid Fox News viewer and Glenn Beck listener Nora Jolly declared she was outraged no one was stopping her from saying "Merry Christmas." Jolly - a casual church-goer who prefers to converse with God directly - told TNA she actively attempted to provoke multiple confrontations with unfortunate cashiers and other consumers at well-known department stores near her home, and no one told her she could not use the Christmas pleasantry.

+

Jolly added, "I even tried to start a fight with a cashier over some banners that read 'Happy Holidays' and 'Season's Greetings' that she almost certainly had no role in hanging. She wouldn't bite, and was super-polite in the face of me being extremely rude. And when I said 'Merry Christmas' to her, she actually said it back to me. Can you believe that?"

[Warpy]

1. Think this stupid woman is going to twig to the fact that she's been lied to?

My guess is never.

[Kber]

2. Funny satire

The Onion ran something similar. Or maybe Borowitz. I forget.

[marble falls]

3. Nil Admirari just isn't the Onion.