Trump's first year is most successful in history, with zero Bigfoot-related deaths

[underpants]

But you can easily identify the many things you should be thanking President Trump for by applying this simple two-part rule:

1) If it happened any time after Inauguration Day 2017 and it was good, President Trump is responsible for it.

2) On the off chance it’s something not good, President Trump is responsible for it only if it can be framed in a way that makes it seem good.

Trump’s conviction that global warming is a hoax has forced temperatures to drop, giving Chicagoans the enviable status of “record breakers.”

Another important improvement over past administrations: The total number of verified Bigfoot-related deaths in 2017 fell to zero, a comforting and substantial improvement over the less-impressive zero Bigfoot-related deaths that occurred during all other American presidents’ first years.

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/opinion/huppke/ct-met-trump-nuclear-button-first-year-huppke-20180103-story.html

[DavidDvorkin]

1. Bullshit

There have been a huuuge number of Bigfoot-related deaths. The Deep State is covering it up.

[Dr Hobbitstein]

2. I was killed by Bigfoot 3 times last year. nt

[underpants]

4. 🕯🕯🕯

[underpants]

3. :-)

[SCantiGOP]

5. It was the best first year in the last year

Believe me. Believe me.