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Florida Man Rescued From Fountain After Swanning Around
https://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2017/12/19/572091923/florida-man-rescued-from-fountain-after-swanning-around
Here's what happened, according to the Orlando Sentinel, the Orlando Weekly and WFTV:
Keith Thurston "ingested a large quantity of Molly" and decided he wanted to commune with the swans because, as the police report put it, "they didn't judge him."
So, of course, he stole a swan-shaped boat, paddled to the fountain at the center of the lake, stepped out from the boat, forgot the crucial step of tying the boat to the fountain, and found himself marooned.
"Officers were called about 4 a.m. Friday after people heard Thurston screaming for help," the Sentinel writes. Police set off on a rescue mission.
Keith Thurston "ingested a large quantity of Molly" and decided he wanted to commune with the swans because, as the police report put it, "they didn't judge him."
So, of course, he stole a swan-shaped boat, paddled to the fountain at the center of the lake, stepped out from the boat, forgot the crucial step of tying the boat to the fountain, and found himself marooned.
"Officers were called about 4 a.m. Friday after people heard Thurston screaming for help," the Sentinel writes. Police set off on a rescue mission.
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